Is It Normal to Have Doubts in a Relationship? A Rule Book of Doubts

Old or new relationship, you might have the odd doubt occasionally. Is it normal to have doubts in a relationship? You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t.

Relationships are complicated things. You’re up, you’re down, you’re bored, you’re happy, you’re not quite sure what you are sometimes. It leaves you wondering — is it normal to have doubts in a relationship?

The bottom line is, if love was supposed to be easy, we’d be falling in and out of it several times a day!

Disney dilemmas

Did you watch a lot of Disney films when you were a child? Be honest.

You might wonder why I’m bringing up the subject of Cinderella, Prince Charming, and Sleeping Beauty at this point, but it’s actually relevant. I used to watch Disney films all the time when I was young, and I loved them. The thing is, I totally blame them for my completely unrealistic view on relationships! Maybe you can sympathize with this. [Read: 14 unrealistic relationship expectations that can ruin your love life]

We’re told that we meet someone, fall in love *hopefully avoiding the evil queen or sorcerer who is trying to stop the whole thing from happening*, and we live happily ever after. End of story.

It’s never like that!

What Disney doesn’t tell you

Disney never talks about the annoying habits you realize they have: the snoring, the nagging, the staying out late, the spending too much money, and the general ups and downs that all normal relationships go through. They don’t mention the let’s-take-a-break talks, drunken arguments, and breaks ups which lead to fantastic make up sex.

It’s no wonder that many people ask themselves, is it normal to have doubts in a relationship? We’re all brainwashed into thinking that we should never doubt our partner, we should be 100% head over heels, and that means not noticing anything annoying about them. [Read: 10 ways to know if your relationship is worth keeping]

Come on, be realistic here people! I notice annoying things about my partner every single day, but that doesn’t mean I want to leave him! I think about our future and I question whether it’s ever going to work out, but I have faith so I don’t bail simply because I have a few doubts every now and then.

What I’m trying to say is that if you’re having doubts occasionally, and they come and go fleetingly, it’s nothing to worry about. If you’re having serious doubts that you’re pretty sure have a solid foundation, well, that’s something else entirely.

Is it normal to have doubts in a relationship which leave you seriously questioning everything?

Yes, it’s normal, because in that case, it means there is a problem in your relationship that needs fixing, or the relationship needs to end. Doubts are a very normal part of being human. We have them because we’re scared, we’re feeling a little paranoid occasionally, we’re anxious, and we have them because there is a real reason for having them. It’s about figuring out which side of the fence your doubts fall onto.

Serious doubts, questions about the future which you’re pretty sure you know the negative answer to, are your instincts telling you that you have a problem you need to address. In that case, yes, these doubts are totally normal. Doubts of any kind of normal, but what you do about them depends upon the doubts themselves. [Read: How to recognize your relationship doubts and make the right choice for you]

Let’s break this down a little, to make it clearer.

Doubts you don’t have to worry about

These include:

– Are they a little distant because they don’t love me anymore? Ridiculous, they’re probably just stressed at work.

– Do I want a future with this person? If the doubt comes and goes, swinging from ‘yes’ to ‘not sure’, it’s not a serious doubt to consider, but something to bear in mind.

– Do I love them or do I just like them a lot? Have you been together years and years? If yes, ask yourself why you’re questioning it. Have you been together a short time? If yes, don’t worry about it. You’re in the confusing phase for now. It will all become abundantly clear in time. [Read: What is love? 12 signs to recognize true love when you see it]

Doubts you should be worried about

Consider these doubts you have carefully:

– Why does every single thing they do annoy me? How long has this been going on? If it’s been a prolonged thing, question why.

– We’ve been together years, are we really that compatible? Not a great sign after years. [Read: 28 revealing signs to know if a relationship is about to end]

Can you see what I’m getting at here? It totally depends on how long you’ve been together, and whether the doubt sticks or it comes and goes.

For instance, after an argument it’s completely normal to doubt everything about your partner, but then when you make up, you are back in love land and everything is fine again. That’s not a doubt, that’s an anger reaction. It’s important to know the difference and not make snap judgements based on temporary emotions. [Read: Steps to telling your partner you’re unhappy]

Normal doubts in a relationship

You might feel guilty when you experience doubts about your partner, and that leads you to ask yourself, is it normal to have doubts in a relationship? I want you to realize that doubts are a normal part of life in general. You’re not supposed to have it all figured out. If you did, then what would be the point?

Sure, you need to know that you’re on the same page when it comes to the future. For instance, you both want children at some stage in the future, not now maybe, but one day. You also need to both be on the same page about potential marriage. Do you want it, or are you happy being together without a ring? It’s important for both to want the same things, but the rest of it can be figured out as you go along.

I live in a foreign country with my partner, and most days I question whether I’m doing the right thing, being away from my family and everything I’ve always known; in fact, not most days, every day. Do I act on it? No. Why? Because I know I’m in the right place. I’m just having jitters about making huge leaps forward in an area of my life which I’ve always lacked confidence in.

It’s vital that you know the difference between real doubts, the ones which you need to pay attention to, and simply your own low self-confidence talking.

Believe it will work, believe it’s for you, and it will be. I really do believe that. If however you’re really not sure if you want to be in a relationship with this person anymore, because they make you unhappy more than they make you smile, then that’s something else entirely. [Read: Should you stay in your relationship or should you go?]

Doubts and issues are two different things

Doubts are little niggles in our brains which can either turn into issues, or simply ebb away like the wind in the trees. Issues are things which are constant problems, arguments that always crop up, things we go back to time and time again, like records stuck on repeat.

Listen to the issues. Only pay a little attention to the doubts. That’s the best way to look at it all.

[Read: Want your happily ever after? Look for these 14 signs]

Is it normal to have doubts in a relationship? Yes! No relationship is perfect, but if yours makes you happy most of the time, throw the Disney rule book out of the window. Make your own instead.

The post Is It Normal to Have Doubts in a Relationship? A Rule Book of Doubts is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Never Have a Sexless Relationship (the Sex Trump Card)

Over the years I've seen friends go through relationships where after a while their woman stops having sex with them. When it happens, the guy is shaken; his self-esteem slides hard. When a man needs something, and is denied it by the woman he thought was there to be his partner for that thing and many others, his view of himself can crater.

I've never had to deal with a sexless relationship for long. A few times in the rockiest parts of soured relationships, I've had female partners do their darnedest to avoid sex with me. I reached a point with one ex like this where it would take me an hour or more of me doing everything I could to break through with her every time before I'd finally get some bone-dry vagina. I've had partners sour enough with me they'd completely dried up for me for sex (like that one), or sometimes firmly denied me for stretches of time.

But in the end, they always ended up pursuing me for sex and initiating on their own again.

I've had some longer relationships... some past the point where other friends' relationships have seen the sex dry completely up. I've had girlfriends whose libidos have waxed and waned. But me getting enough sex with them, except for short tumultuous stretches before I fix whatever the issue is, has never long been a problem.

This is a thing most people dread, the sexless relationship / sexless marriage. It's something when people fall into it, they become lost, confused, lonely, and hurt.

They don't know how to remedy it... and can't find a way out.

Yet, the most reliable cure for sexlessness is a simple one.

It's a position you can adopt that will motivate any partner who wants to keep you to be a whole heck of a lot more flexible with her sex life with you.

That position is this:

I completely understand if you don't want sex. But I NEED sex, and I'm going to HAVE it. If you can't provide it to me, I'll be sad, but again, I understand.

You will find out very quickly at this point whether she wants you enough to change the sex life... or whether things are so far gone it's time for you to hit the eject button.

How to Get a Girl to Send Nudes & Excite Her Into Wanting to Do It

In the time of modern romance, nudes have become very common. If you’re wondering how to get a girl to send nudes, well, then keep reading.

Ah yes, the art of learning how to get a girl to send nudes. It’s a tricky subject. I’ve never been one who enjoyed the idea of sending naked pictures to men I don’t know, simply out of paranoia. Of course, when we’re talking about my partner, that’s a different story because I trust him.

But even then, if there’s a bad breakup, then what? I have no idea what’s going to happen to all those photos. But anyway, most people aren’t worried. Why?

Because almost everyone has sent a nude in their day. Nudes are like receiving a ‘good morning’ text message. People send nudes to each other like they’re emojis. [Read: The 10 ways to get sexy snapshots without asking]

How to get a girl to send nudes without pushing for it

But if you’re talking to someone new, sending nudes isn’t going to happen that fast. No way. Even though nudes are really common, people are still cautious when it comes to pressing send.

So, what does this mean for you? Well, the thing about nudes is that you can’t ask for them. That’s right. You should never ask for a nude. Nude photos are gifts. You need to be gifted a nude.

If you’re not gifted one, well, you’re out of luck. So, how you do receive such a gift? This is how to get a girl to send nudes. And no, it doesn’t start with a dick pic.

#1 Don’t ask. Like said earlier, you should never ask a girl for nude photos. First of all, women don’t like the idea of a man asking for a naked photo, it’s not attractive. There’s something sad about asking a woman for a nude photo. You’re more likely to receive one if you don’t ask for a nude. [Read: How to be a gentleman and win her over with your charm]

#2 Please, do NOT send a dick pic. Many men think that by sending a dick pic, they’ll receive an endless stream of nudes. But that’s not how it works. See, very few women actually enjoy receiving a dick pic from a man.

There’s no way to take an attractive dick pic, and women aren’t masturbating to the photo. So, keep your dick in your pants for now because it’s not needed.

#3 Don’t jump straight into pics. If you want nude photos, build up the relationship with her. You can’t just message her for the first time asking for nudes, it’s not going to work. Instead, you need to genuinely talk to her, and see how it goes.

If she likes you, she’ll flirt with you, and allow the relationship to continue to develop. But if she doesn’t like you, don’t push it. [Read: How to slide into a girl’s DM and get a reply]

#4 Not all women like taking nudes. Don’t assume that all women have an album in their phone of nudes that are just waiting to be sent out. It’s not like that at all. Many women don’t like the idea of taking nudes, everyone has their own preferences. If she doesn’t like the idea of sending nudes to you, she’s not going to do it. Don’t push her. Instead, back off.

#5 Dirty talk is an art. If you’re texting, and things are going well, you can slowly add in dirty talk to see what happens. If she doesn’t like it, she’ll reject it, and that’s fine. Now you know where you stand. If she’s into it, you can continue to dirty talk and progress into full-on sexting. If sexting happens, nudes may happen as well. [Read: 20 dirty questions to ask a girl and make her really wet]

#6 Don’t expect nudes. Some men feel they’re entitled to a woman sending them nudes. But that’s where they’re wrong. No man should feel like they’re entitled to receive nudes from anyone. It’s a woman’s choice whether or not she wants to send nudes.

If she wants to send nudes, that works out well for you. If she doesn’t want to send you nudes, that’s also okay. At the end of the day, she doesn’t need to send you anything. [Read: The nine reasons why a girl might not like you]

#7 Understand your partner’s likes. The key to a healthy relationship is figuring out what your partner likes and dislikes. For example, maybe she has a foot fetish and enjoys taking selfies of her feet. But when it comes to nudes, she’s not into it. Everyone has their own comfort levels which you should respect.

#8 Don’t be vulgar. For someone to take a photo of their naked body and send it to another person, it takes a lot of courage. They’re really putting themselves out there. So, that being said, if you receive a nude, don’t be vulgar or rude. There’s a line between dirty talking and vulgarity. You should never make a woman feel objectified. It’s disgusting and shows a lack of respect. If this happens, you will never get anywhere with women. [Read: How to ask for nudes and receive a gallery of naked pictures]

#9 You need to show that you’re trustworthy. Why should you be the one to receive a nude photo? How does she know you’re trustworthy? Now, this is a good question to ask yourself. Before she hits send, she’s going to decide whether or not you’re someone she can trust. Show discretion and the type of person you are.

#10 Show your attraction to her. Don’t nag a woman into sending you a nude, she won’t do it. This isn’t something you can change her mind on. Instead, show your appreciation to her, and make her feel like she’s desired. If she’s attractive to you, let her know. You don’t need to lie or be fake, she’ll sniff it out. [Read: How to show a girl you like her without actually telling her]

#11 Show appreciation. If she does send you nude photos, be appreciative. This isn’t something small. It’s a big deal. She literally sent you a photo of her naked body. If you act cold afterward, well, don’t ever expect her to send you a nude photo again. You just squashed her ego, and that isn’t a smart move on your part.

[Read: The 15 effortless and small gestures that girls always notice and appreciate]

Understanding how to get a girl to send nudes isn’t that easy. But follow these tips and it shouldn’t be too hard. At the end of the day, as long as there’s a connection and you’re respectful, she’ll send you nudes.

The post How to Get a Girl to Send Nudes & Excite Her Into Wanting to Do It is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Get Laid by Creating “Backup” Logistics

Are you good at snagging girls' numbers at bars and clubs but can’t turn them into anything? Here’s the perfect technique to turn those numbers into sex – tonight!

Contents

1. Logistics

1. How Logistics Alone Can Get You Laid

2. Introducing the Backup

1. Take Numbers
2. After-Party Invite

3. Three Scenarios

1. You Host
2. Someone Else’s After-party
3. The Last Shot

4. Recap

Hey, guys. Welcome back. I hope you are all doing great!

Today we will discuss logistics! Ah yes, logistics – a subject of such great importance that so many of you find boring.

I will share one of my techniques that is nearly 100% based on logistics – it has given me tons of lays. In fact, the first time I got 8 lays in one month (years ago) was by using this technique.

This is a simple logistical technique that is EASY TO PULL OFF yet very powerful on many levels. You will need some basic pickup skills to pull it off, so knowing a decent level of fundamentals may be a prerequisite for the full effect. But even if you don’t know the basics yet, this can still work (but the better your fundamentals, the better it will work).

FYI, this post is about night game.

Let's get to it!

How to Get a Boyfriend in College Without Losing Your Mind & Freedom

If you are wondering how to get a boyfriend in college, you have a lot to learn. But I’ve got you, so let’s begin. Class is in session.

A lot of us want to know how to get a boyfriend in college. For many, it is your first time being out on your own. You are away from your parents and maybe your high school ex. It seems like now is the perfect time to meet your dream guy. But, there is a problem with trying to get a boyfriend in college. As soon as that is your goal, it is pretty much doomed from the start.

College, although a time to explore and try new things, is also about school and friendship. College is a chance for you to date and truly see what you like and what you don’t.

If looking for a boyfriend in college is your priority, not only are missing out on tons of other amazing opportunities, but you may be wasting your time. [Read: The questions to ask yourself to see if you’re ready for a relationship]

Why wondering how to get a boyfriend in college is no good

Whether you were single in high school or not, having a boyfriend in college probably sounds wonderful.  You get to date someone without your parents breathing down your necks, without a curfew, and without supervision.

You may want to get the most out of this newfound independence. And that all makes sense. I was the same way. The only thing is, and I know it is cliche, but, getting a boyfriend is not that big of a deal.

The idea of a boyfriend is much more attractive than actually having one, especially in college. This is a time for you to make lifelong friends, focus on your courses, your job, and your future. You have so much to figure out, why drag a guy into it? [Read: The 12 types of guys you’ll meet in college]

Not only do relationships bring on a ton more drama and stress than you already have in college, but they take up valuable time.

The fact that you are desperately wondering how to get a boyfriend in college tells me you are more interested in having a boyfriend to have one, not to meet the right one. Having a boyfriend just because can lead to resentment, dysfunction, and even social decay; essentially wasting your college years.

You do not want to spend this amazing time in your life worried about a guy that calls you dude, doesn’t respect you or depends on you for Psych 101 notes. Sorry to be so negative, but there is only a slim chance your college boyfriend will last for the long haul anyways. [Read:  College bucket list: 30 must-have items on your list]

How to get a boyfriend in college

Now, I am not saying you shouldn’t have a boyfriend or that you shouldn’t date in college. By all means, if the mood strikes or you like someone, go for it. My advice is simply don’t go looking for it. You can be open to love and romance and the possibility of a boyfriend without actively looking.

Put your focus and energy into things that are more beneficial to you and worth your while, boyfriend or not. Join a club or group. Try standup comedy or join in on planning a women’s march. Form a study group or student government.

All of these things will provide you with a lot more than your average college boyfriend can. And while you are doing these activities, you may actually come across someone that shares your morals and could potentially be your college boyfriend. [Read: How to get guys to notice you and fall for you]

Why you shouldn’t try to get a boyfriend in college

Meeting anyone with the intention of having them be your boyfriend is sort of self-sabotage. You are putting so much pressure on a guy you barely know. And having that word, boyfriend, flashing in the back of your mind constantly forces something that maybe shouldn’t be.

When you are looking for how to get a boyfriend in college, you are not being genuine about your feelings. It isn’t about the label boyfriend, it is about the actual connection you and this boy have.

I know I sound like a Debbie-downer, but I have been there. And I wasted some of my best college years pining over guys that weren’t worth my time or my tears. I could have enjoyed those years with friends. I could have even met someone that was a great match if I wasn’t so preoccupied with nailing down a boyfriend before I hit 21. [Read: Casual dating: 15 reasons why it’s the best thing ever]

Things to do instead of getting a boyfriend in college

Instead of having the goal of getting a boyfriend in college, change your focus. Looking at life through a new perspective not only opens new doors, but it changes how you look at those doors.

By focusing on other things in life, you realize you don’t need a boyfriend. You are a whole person on your own. You are awesome. And if you find someone they won’t be your other half, they will just add to your already 100% greatness.

When your life is full in every way, a boyfriend that is right for you will find you. I know it sounds cheesy, but it is true. I won’t say that the second you stop looking he’ll find you, but once you focus on something else, love has a way of making an appearance in the most unexpected placing. [Read: The real meaning of YOLO and how to live life to the fullest]

Like where?

#1 Join a club. This sounds so bad, but there are hundreds of clubs at college. And the kids in them are not losers. These are simply people with shared interests that are hanging out. Find something you’re passionate about and check out your school’s website and social media to see if there’s a club, if not, create your own.

It can be about making pancakes, watching Game of Thrones, or sewing. By bringing together like-minded people, you can create true friendships.

#2 Protest. Now is a time in our lives when we need to make our voices heard. And as young people, you can make a difference. You are the future, so start now. It seems like there are protests and marches at least once a month.

Not only can you go and support these on the day of the event, but you can volunteer to help with planning and spreading the word.

#3 Go to class. This is obvious, but there is a lot of class cutting in college. Instead of worrying yourself about a boyfriend, focus on your schoolwork. That is why you’re in college in the first place, right?

Take courses that inspire you and interest you. This way it will be exciting to get up and go rather than a nightmare. [Read: 13 secrets to find your passion in the simplest things]

#4 Get a job. Not only is it always great to have a little extra cash, but if you start saving for your future now, you will be so happy you did. It may not be the sexiest, but it gives you a little cushion for after you graduate and gives you real-life experience.

And depending on where you find a job, you can meet tons of interesting people.

#5 Date. You are probably saying, “huh?” I didn’t say dating was off the table, just that you don’t need to get a boyfriend. That doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. Now is your chance to experiment.

Date different types of guys. Go on fun dates. Make friends and get this experience before settling down. And if you find the person, great, if not, you still had fun. [Read: 17 vital secrets you should know about dating in college]

#6 Attend seminars. There is a serious lack of attendance at college events and seminars. While everyone is at the football game or frat party, there are tons of events your tuition is helping to pay for. Why not get your money’s worth.

Whether it is in the school newspaper or on the website, look into the latest events. There are writers that do book readings, concerts, and even Q&As with people you would never expect. These are great places to learn outside of class and to meet more people outside of your daily activities.

[Read: The big differences between relationships in college vs mid-twenties]

Sorry if I bummed you out about learning how to get a boyfriend in college, but hopefully, I inspired you to make your college years about more than boys. Make them about you.

The post How to Get a Boyfriend in College Without Losing Your Mind & Freedom is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

The Girlfriend Pickup Dip

If you're exclusively a monogamous sort of guy, this article won't apply to you at all.

However, if you ever find yourself in situations where you have one or more women you see regularly for sex, yet you're still on the dating scene, looking for new girls to pair up with, you will encounter this.

It's a phenomenon we might call The Girlfriend Pickup Dip.

The Dip looks like this: once you have a woman or two to tend to your sexual needs regularly, your motivation to seek new sex partners begins to dry up.

You grow less driven to secure new girls. Your tolerance for dating-related difficulties (like women flaking, testing you, or sending you mixed signals) erodes.

You may still go out, but the hunger isn't there. It's harder to get higher caliber women, too, despite everything you've been told: that high caliber women like guys who aren't needy, that women want men other women want, that women can 'smell' success... despite these things, when your drive isn't there, women can sense it, and that's the biggest thing. Because high caliber women want men who value them highly, and are willing to put a minimum level of investment in to get them.

Thus, as an almost inevitable consequence, as you bring more women into your life, and 'fill your pipeline' or 'fill up your rotation', you reach a point where your motivation to keep adding new women falls, and you are less-good at getting the really top notch girls you got at your hungriest, as well as just doing the same volume of new girls in general.

This is The Dip, and if you like multiple women in your life, it can be a thorn in your side.

How to Be Affectionate: 15 Gestures that Reveal Your Feelings Best

You love your partner, but when it comes to affection, it’s not your forte. But there are simple things you can learn on how to be affectionate.

Just because you may not be the most affectionate person doesn’t mean that can’t change. In fact, you can learn how to be affectionate with your partner and improve your relationship. Of course, you’re not going to change overnight and become this super romantic, lovey-dovey type. Everyone expresses love differently.

Some people don’t even like the idea of being physically touched. Affection may need to be shown in different ways. But let’s not get too much into detail right now. If you’re wondering how you can be more affectionate, then you’ve come to the right place. Keep reading if you’re interested in learning what you can do.

How to be affectionate with your partner

I used to think I was the affectionate type, but then I met my partner. Now, he’s really affectionate and a romantic at heart. And though we get along very well and spend a lot of our time laughing and enjoying each other’s company, I could be more affectionate. This isn’t to say I’m an ice queen, but it’s easy for me to get wrapped up in what’s going on with work and family. Ignoring my partner’s needs.

[Read: How to show affection in a relationship if it doesn’t come naturally]

No one said being in a relationship was easy. It’s constant work and something I didn’t really understand until being in one. I mean, people tell you that relationships are work, but when you’re single, it doesn’t mean much to you.

Let’s throw a little love and affection toward your partner.

#1 How do you express affection? You are affectionate, just maybe not in the same way as your partner. And that’s fine. Not every couple matches perfectly in this department. What you need to do is find out how you and your partner both express affection.

Usually, there are five ways: acts of kindness, giving gifts, physical touch, quality time, and words of assurance. [Read: Understand your partner better by asking them these 20 questions]

#2 Talk to your partner. If you’re not feeling loved or your partner is feeling neglected, talk about it with them. You don’t need to become upset or angry; this is a moment for you to self-improve. Be honest with each other and see how you can work things out. [Read: How to create a deeper connection with your partner]

#3 Start being affectionate. You may want your partner to be more affectionate, but sometimes they need a helping hand. So, why not make the first move? Make your partner breakfast in bed, pack their lunch, or hold their hand when out on the town. It’ll show them you’re interested in working on things and give them ideas on how they can be affectionate.

#4 Show appreciation. You partner may be trying to be more affectionate but is struggling. And this is something you’ll need to be patient with. But, while they’re working hard, do show them you appreciate their efforts. You can do this by telling them or being more affectionate as well. [Read: The 25 sweetest romantic gestures for everyday life]

#5 Reward your partner. When they’ve shown affection towards you, reward them. I know, it sounds a little weird; they’re not a dog. But positive reinforcement can work wonders to promote affectionate behavior. By rewarding them, they’ll want to do it again.

#6 Be intimate. Everyone nowadays is so busy with work and family, they push intimacy to the side. But this is something you should focus on, if you want to know how to be affectionate. Even if you need to schedule a time for intimacy, do it. Sex and intimacy is a crucial part of a relationship. 

#7 Get flirty. When you’re in a relationship, sometimes you forget what it’s like to flirt with someone. Just because you’re together doesn’t mean you can’t flirt with each other. Flirting is not only fun, but it increases sexual tension and chemistry, taking you back to the beginning of the relationship. [Read: How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever]

#8 Make time for one another. Some people aren’t into physical affection, but as I said earlier, there are other forms of affection. Regardless, you should be making time for your partner. Whether it’s a date night or going for a daily walk, it’ll give you time to reconnect.

#9 Reciprocate. When your partner is trying to be affectionate, reciprocate by doing something back. If they give you a back rub one day, then reciprocate by giving them a foot rub the next day. This won’t make them feel like it’s a one-way street. [Read: How to fix a one-sided relationship before it ends in failure]

#10 Accept their affection. Unless it’s making you uncomfortable, of course. But when your partner is being more affectionate, don’t reject them. This will only make them refrain from showing affection towards you. In other words, your plan will backfire in a big way.

#11 Get cuddling. Everyone needs to cuddle. Whether it’s in front of Netflix or not, just get into bed and start cuddling with your partner. Cuddling can not only get things going, but it’s a way to bond with your partner. [Read: Do guys like to cuddle? 15 secrets you probably don’t know]

#12 Be their biggest fan. If you’re in a relationship, your partner should be your biggest fan and vice versa. Being supportive of your partner is one of the biggest acts of affection. Don’t knock down an idea they have or squash their dreams. Push them forward.

#13 Ask them what they want. You may not be feeling the love in the relationship, but have you directly asked them what they want? You’re trying to be more affectionate, but is it in the way that they need affection? You have to ask your partner these questions.

#14 Check in with them. You may have started to be more affectionate, but it’s now been a couple of months. So, how is the relationship now? Is there something still missing? Or areas you can improve on? Remember, relationships are constant work. You should always be checking in with your partner and seeing if their needs are being met, and vice versa. [Read: How to stop being codependent for a healthy love life]

#15 Ask for affection. If you want a back rub from your partner, ask for it. If you want your partner to give you a kiss, ask them for one. This doesn’t mean you’re desperate. It’s showing them what you need at that moment. It’ll help give them an idea of what you need from them.

[Read: How to be more affectionate in your relationship and show them you care]

Everyone loves receiving affection from their partner. But not everyone is naturally the affection type. Try out these tips for how to be affectionate with your partner.

The post How to Be Affectionate: 15 Gestures that Reveal Your Feelings Best is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Pick Between Two Guys When You Just Can’t Make Up Your Mind

We may not have all been there, but there is a way you can learn how to pick between two guys. And it is this… are you ready?

First of all, congratulations! You have found two decent guys that you like, that is two times more than many people find, so good for you. But do you know how to pick between two guys?

Now that we’ve celebrated, you do not want to mess up this choice. Yup, the pressure is on. This is not like picking out a dress. You cannot return one and go back to the other. 

Why can’t you pick between two guys?

Before we get into the how, let’s get into the why. Why are you in this pickle in the first place? Did you cheat? Are you afraid of ditching a decent boyfriend for someone that you are unsure about?

Think about your particular situation. How you got here says a lot about you. Have you been dating someone for a while but recently met someone you feel something else for? Or are you starting to develop feelings for a friend even though you have a boyfriend?

Think about what led you to have feelings for both of these guys. How did those feelings arise and how did you realize you had them? [Read: Should you worry about a friend crush or is it harmless?]

How NOT to pick between two guys

There are quite a few things you can do to make this decision easier for yourself or just to help make the decision, but there are also a fair amount of things you should not do when picking between two guys.

Make sure you avoid these things. They may be tempting, but they will not help you make a choice, at least not the right one.

#1 Do NOT just pick the guy you met first. This is something a lot of people in your situation may do. It seems only fair but is just an easy way out of making a bigger decision.

Just because you were dating someone first, met them first, or chose them early doesn’t mean that is your choice now. Things change. It sucks to hurt one of these guys, but it sucks more to lead them both on. [Read: What to do when you like someone else]

#2 Do NOT pick who anyone tells you to pick. Your parents may like one guy more than another. Your friends may also prefer one guy to the other. As much as their insight can guide you and clue you into things you may not have seen on your own, this decision is yours and yours alone.

It is your life.

#3 Do NOT make a pro and con list. Many people will tell you that is the way to go. If you make a pro and con list, you can see a quantitative list of both guys and what you like or don’t like. But, remember how that worked out for Ross on Friends?

You cannot file down a guy only to the qualities you can put down on paper. That is not how people or relationships work. [Read: Is he boyfriend material or fling material?]

#4 Do NOT binge The Bachelorette. When we need help making choices, we go to people for advice and it is great to go to people who have been in this situation before. But, this is not that common of a situation, unless of course, you are The Bachelorette.

You might think watching the show will give you some insight into figuring out how to pick between two guys, but it is all about you now. No matter how many long drawn out monologues we get watching that show, we never know how she is truly feeling. The reason the ending is so shocking is because only she knows how she feels, just like you.

#5 Do NOT judge their looks. So one guy is taller and one is shorter? Maybe one has a thick head of hair and perfect teeth while the other is balding and could use some floss. Does this really matter? No.

Looks can be deceiving and are not equivalent to the person. The most handsome guy in the world could be the devil. So try to look beyond their looks and choose between these two guys based on who they are, not what they look like. [Read: 20 qualities in a guy that make him a really good man]

How to pick between two guys

Now that you know what to avoid when learning how to pick between two guys, here are the steps you should take before picking between two guys. Then, hopefully, you can make up your mind confidently.

#1 Consider how they make you feel. This may be the most important part of your decision. Try not to focus on what they say or even do. Think about how they make you feel. When you are with each one, how do you feel?

Are you nervous or do you feel safe? Are you accepted and respected? Do you feel comfortable around them? [Read: The 11 signs you have found your soulmate]

#2 Think about your future. This is a big part of your choice too. If you are picking a guy to form a serious relationship with, you do not want to pick one that has conflicting plans. If you want to settle down and have kids and they want to travel the world for the next five years, how will that work?

Think about if your future plans align.

#3 Do you have chemistry? Chemistry can be finicky. It can be anything from passion to a deep connection. It can be intense physically or emotionally. But, what matters more to you. Do you have chemistry in every area with one of them? [Read: How to tell if there’s no chemistry and you should stop trying]

#4 Talk to your friends and family. Even though you are ultimately making this choice alone, you can benefit a lot from the insight of the people closest to you. Your friends may not know how you feel inside, but they know if you complain about one guy and rave about the other.

Your family and friends know how you are when you come back from seeing one of these guys. They know who makes you light up when they text you or smile when you talk about them.

#5 Who talks to you? I once dated a guy who I thought the world of, but looking back we never talked. I was so goo-goo over him I looked past the fact that we had nothing in common and never had a deep conversation. The chemistry overtook me.

But, chemistry does not make a relationship. So, by thinking about who you can actually communicate with, you may find your answer. Relationships only work when you are open and honest with each other and if one of these guys isn’t he probably won’t change.

#6 Clear your mind. This is something I tell my friends, family, and strangers like you whenever you have a big decision to make. Whether it is about dumping someone, taking a new job, or choosing between two guys, this is the best advice I can offer.

Clear your mind. Don’t think about either guy. Don’t think about the future or the past. Don’t think about your family or stress or which guy makes life easier. Don’t think about the fallout or the potential breakup or who can handle it.

Clear your mind and whoever you think of is the one. It’s that simple. I know it seems cheesy and it isn’t that simple, but if all else fails, this is what can reassure you. Your subconscious has already made up its mind, you just didn’t know it yet. [Read: 16 signs to know if you found your twin soul]

Should you pick between two guys?

Sometimes there is a reason you are struggling how to pick between two guys. If the decision is that hard, maybe neither one is right for you.

I know it sucks and feels like you don’t appreciate what you have if you choose neither, but again, it is your life. You can’t just pick one because he is better or less bad than the other. No matter how similar or different they are, if your heart is not leaning one way or the other, its because you aren’t ready. Sometimes you just need to pick you.

Even with all the thinking and considering, when you found the right guy it won’t be so hard to choose.

[Read: Looking for true love? Avoid these 13 types of men]

I hope you now know how to pick between two guys, and make the right decision for you and your life. Now, try not to let this happen again.

The post How to Pick Between Two Guys When You Just Can’t Make Up Your Mind is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Tony’s Tips for Getting First-Date Sex

The first date is your best chance to have sex. Whether you want a one-night stand or to make her your girlfriend, these first-date sex tips will help make it happen.

Contents

1. The First Date Mindset

1. Women Love Sex, Too
2. Moving Too Fast

2. Tony’s First Date Template

1. The Ask
2. Be Close to Home
3. Priming
4. No Wild Adventures
5. Date in the Evening
6. Fun = Subject, Vibe, Location
7. Touchy-Feely
8. Make Her Work a Little
9. Don’t Eat Big Meals
10. Pulling
11. The “My Place” Date

3. Above All, Keep It Simple

Once you learn how to approach women and get dates, you might run into other quality problems – like how to turn those dates into sex. The most logical way is to bring her home on the first date.

And I'm here to show you why it's not only the most logical way, but also the most effective way. The only reason you shouldn’t be aiming for sex on the first date is if – well, honestly, I can’t think of any reason.

I always try for sex on the first date.

As long as there’s mutual attraction, why wouldn’t you try to sleep with her? It’s in both you and the girl’s best interest to copulate as soon as possible. The sooner, the better. Because the farther you get away from banging, the less likely it is to happen at all. And once you do, she’ll backward rationalize that she really likes you, otherwise, why would she have slept with you on the first date?

There could be the odd chance she feels buyer’s remorse; like she slept with you too fast, but it’s rare, and it’s her problem, not yours.

Or she may feel she was used for sex. But you can mitigate this by cuddling, having post-sex intimate conversation, or taking her for breakfast in the morning.

The 15 Best Books to Read after a Breakup and Begin Your Healing

When it comes to healing post-breakup, sometimes all you need is a good book. But where to start? Take a look at these books to read after a breakup.

No one wants to go through hard situations, but we don’t have a choice. We must get through it somehow, and I’m here to help. I chose some books to read after a breakup to not only remind you how strong you are but help you through this phase of your life.

What can I say? Breakups suck. There’s nothing else to it. Even if you weren’t in love, you invested time and energy into someone you connected with. And now, they’re no longer in your life.

15 best books to read after a breakup

Usually, when getting over someone, we resort to rebounding or excessively creeping our ex’s social media. Not surprisingly, none of these things help. [Read: How to know if you’re ready for rebound sex or not]

You really should be focusing on the healing process, but from a different angle. Sure, your friends are there to comfort you, but sometimes the people around you don’t understand what you’re feeling.

Surprisingly, books can act as our shoulder to cry on and show a different perspective on the situation you find yourself in. Now, I’m not talking about every book. There are certainly some books I wouldn’t recommend you read during a breakup. You want a book that’s going to help you go through the healing process—make you laugh, cry, and remind you that breakups are just a part of life.

It’s time to heal. So, crack open one of these books to read after a breakup and let the healing begin!

#1 This is How You Lose Her by Junot Diaz. One of my favorite books of all time. This is How You Lose Her goes through the dating life of one man, and how he lost each of his relationships. It’s deep, it’s funny, and it’s honest. [Read: How to deal with heartbreak in a healthy way]

#2 Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed. Whatever you’re going through, whether it’s a breakup or the loss of a loved one, read this book. Strayed does an amazing job of simplifying the complex thoughts you have in your head, helping you to think clearly about your own life.

#3 My Sister, The Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite. Am I saying that murder is the answer? No! But sometimes you just need to take your mind off of the situation and dive into a crazy story. In this book, Ayoola has a small problem: she keeps killing her boyfriends. And her sister Korede keeps covering her up. But when they both fall in love with the same man, that’s when the drama begins. [Read: The pity playlist you need to help heal your broken heart]

#4 The Pisces by Melissa Broder. If you’re suffering from love withdrawal, then Broder’s book is something you need to check out. It’s the perfect story if you’re looking to escape out of your own mind.

#5 How to Date Men When You Hate Men by Blythe Roberson. Well, this is a pretty fitting title for the occasion, right? If you want to have a good laugh, then you need to read this book. Roberson covers everything from dating culture, trying to find dates, and being tired of men.

#6 My Education by Susan Choi. When you’re in love, it feels so real. In Choi’s book, she talks about the relationship between a grad student and married couple, and all the nitty-gritty details in between. Young love is beautiful, but it’s also bittersweet.

#7 The Curse of the Boyfriend Sweater by Alanna Okun. Just by the title, you know this book is going to be good. Okun does an amazing job of describing the emotions of being newly single. And she asks the question, “What do you do when your partner is not yours anymore?”

#8 Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes. If the relationship you were in was anything but positive, then you’re probably thinking about making a change in your life. And that’s a great idea. In this book, Rhimes decides to say yes to everything for one year. Now, her life does change for the better, but that doesn’t mean you need to do the same thing. But you should try something new. [Read: How to listen to your gut and give strength to your inner voice]

#9 Tell Me Lies by Carola Lovering. If you just left college and are experiencing a breakup, you’d be a fool not to read this book. This book is about going through young adulthood while being in a relationship. It will definitely help you work through your own situation. 

#10 How Stella got her Groove Back by Terry McMillan. You’ve probably heard of the movie, but I recommend you give the book a read first. A middle-aged woman goes to Jamaica and falls in love with a sexy, young man. It’s a great book to remind yourself that there’s more to life, and you will find love again. [Read: Self-discovery after a breakup – How to happily move on]

#11 Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante. If you want to let your mind get lost in darkness, then this is the novel for you. Days of Abandonment is a dramatic breakup story about an Italian woman who’s abandoned by her husband; leaving her with two children to raise. While she’s grieving, her mind goes down dark roads.

#12 Dear Future Boyfriend by Cristin O’Keefe Aptowicz. Sometimes you just want to sit in your sadness, and that’s perfectly fine. In the poetry book, there’s a poem for every emotion you’re feeling right now. You’re not alone when this book is in your hands.

#13 Stay with Me by Ayobami Adebayo. Some love stories are simple, and others are more complicated. If your relationship was long-term and complex, well, then you’ll relate to this book. The narrative follows the lives of a complicated couple and the challenges which threaten their relationship.

#14 I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith. Cassandra Mortmain is 17-years-old and decided to write a journal about her life with her family in a deteriorating castle. But when two American brothers move to town, well, that changes the course of her life. [Read: The seven stages of grief to expect when you become an ex] 

#15 Stag’s Leap by Sharon Olds. Sometimes a book of poetry can hit the spot in ways a novel can’t. When mourning a breakup, you always need to read some super sad poetry, and, Olds’ poetry will take you through the grieving process. The book goes through the stages of grief and is based on when her husband left her for another woman.

[Read: How to let go of the past and look to the future]

Breakups are hard, but these good books to read after a breakup can make the healing process much easier. Grab one of these books and dive in.

The post The 15 Best Books to Read after a Breakup and Begin Your Healing is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

The Health Benefits of Hugging that’ll Make You Want to Cuddle More

Did you know there are some serious benefits of hugging? So, grab someone you like *with their permission, of course* and give them a squeeze!

Did you know there are some great benefits of hugging? You might not be aware of them. When you read about these seven benefits on your mind and body, you might feel differently about getting a little cuddly!

How do you feel about hugging?

Not everyone is a touchy feeling kind of person. I’ll freely admit that I am. I love a good hug. You know the kind that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. For me, a hug can be enough to take away the stresses of the day.

For others, a hug is an invasion of personal space. We’re all different. We all react differently to various situations.

Where do you stand on hugs? Do you love them or hate them? Or, do you just tolerate them because you don’t want to seem cold or stand-offish? You might feel quite cuddly one day and avoid any type of touch the next. Humans are complex beings!

[Read: How to be true to yourself and live life on your terms]

Seven surprising benefits of hugging

Hugging is a personal choice in many ways. Always do what you feel comfortable with. But prepare to be amazed by the benefits of hugging!

#1 Hugging shows you care and support that person. Hugging someone you care about is more than just a physical thing. It’s actually a show of emotional support too. If that person is stressed out, feeling low, dealing with something, a hug could be just the thing they need in that moment.

It’s the physical way of saying ‘hey, are you okay?’. Not everyone is comfortable with talking about their feelings. A hug can be a non-verbal way to say you see they’re suffering or upset, and you’re there for them no matter what. Put simply, this is one of the biggest benefits of hugging if someone close to you is going through something. [Read: How to take care of yourself emotionally and avoid falling apart]

#2 Hugs might actually be immune system boosting. A recent study has shown that hugging might actually help you avoid becoming sick quite so often. This all comes down how hugging reduces stress.

Our brain releases feel-good hormones when we hug someone and feel relaxed in that moment. This stress reduction, even if just for a short time, has an impact on your immune system. If you hug enough, it might just help you stay healthier in the long-term! [Read: Feeling unlovable? 12 life changing truths you need to know]

#3 Hugging helps you grow closer to someone. We’ve all heard of Oxytocin, a hormone which the brain releases. It makes us feel all warm and cuddly. Sometimes called the ‘love hormone’ for the simple reason that it helps us grow closer to people and feel calmer and relaxed as a result. Oxytocin is responsible for that warm and cuddly feeling you get after sex, but even a hug is enough to release it and make you feel closer to that person.

So, if you want to increase your bond, get hugging!

#4 Hugging might give you a stronger heart. Yet again, hugging releases relaxing hormones and reduces stress levels. What does this do? It helps your heart remain strong and stops stress from causing all manner of nasty issues. For instance, high blood pressure is known to be detrimental over time for your heart health.

High blood pressure is also associated with stress. In some cases, provided there isn’t a health-related issue underlying, reducing stress via hugging *thanks to that Oxytocin* could therefore contribute to a healthier heart, when you live a healthy and active life at the same time.

Helping your heart stay health is certainly one the best benefits of hugging! [Read: 20 positive ways to pay it forward and create a chain of goodwill]

#5 Hugging makes you smile. Yet again, we pay homage to those hormones released when we hug. Oxytocin not only makes you feel calm, less stressed, and quite relaxed, but it creates happiness. Your levels of Oxytocin rise whenever you are close to someone, e.g. when you touch, hug, or sometimes even sit next to another person.

This gives you a boost of happiness, assuming you like that other person. Women in particular are strongly affected by Oxytocin. If this is one of the benefits of hugging, get hugging!

#6 Hugging helps to take away ‘in the moment’ fears. There’s a reason why babies cry and when you hug or cuddle them they often stop. Hugging is not only a tool for calming you down but it also reassures. And in that very moment, it takes away your fears. If you struggle with anxiety, get hugging. Hugging has been shown to help reduce fears, reduce worries, and, if done enough, perhaps even help to reduce anxiety to a degree.

#7 Hugging might help to reduce certain types of pain. We need to refer to another study to give this one some proof. To show that light touching, including hugging, relieved pain symptoms, a group of fibromyalgia sufferers had a series of therapeutic treatments involving light touch to the arms in particular. Each of those people reported less pain and a better quality of life.

While I’m not suggesting that hugging can totally magic away pain, it looks like it can reduce it. It’s probably down to that dose of Oxytocin once more. The relaxing and stress-relieving effects of this hormone are quite far reaching. If it can reduce the pain that someone is in even just a little, surely it’s worth a go? [Read: 13 ways to keep growing yourself into a kinder human being]

Ready to get hugging?

What do you think about these benefits of hugging? They’re pretty impressive, right?

If you thought hugging was just an annoyance, something those perky people do when they feel like being ultra-annoying, you’re far from the mark! Hugging is one expression of love and caring. It’s a silent communication method and a way of reducing stress and boosting your overall health and wellbeing as a result. Who would have known that hugging can actually help your heart health? It’s true!

Now, I’m not suggesting you go around hugging everyone you see. It would be annoying. You’d quickly get a reputation as being a nuisance, and probably quite weird. What I am suggesting is that if you love someone or even care about them in some way, show it in a hug every now and then. We all need a cuddle sometimes. With these benefits of hugging ready to be grabbed, you have your ideal excuse!

Of course, some people don’t feel comfortable with hugging for different reasons. Maybe they were never really hugged as a child and find it a little space invading or uncomfortable. Or it can be that they simply aren’t a tactile kind of person. In each case, respect their boundaries.

Never push your hugging onto someone simply because there are benefits to it. Remember, we all have our limitations and those are personal to us all. In that case, a light touch on the arm and a smile might be enough to show them you care.

[Read: 16 steps for how to feel better about your life]

The benefits of hugging are far-reaching and also quite surprising! The cuddling/love hormone called Oxytocin is at the heart of it all.

The post The Health Benefits of Hugging that’ll Make You Want to Cuddle More is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Tactics Tuesdays: Group Invite Dates

Girl won't come out, or isn't sure about you… or you're too busy to meet her 1-on-1? Extend a group invite date to her, and get her doing something social with you.

My normal advice with you for dates is 'get her out alone with you'.

Don't make dates less intimate. Don't do party dates. Don't do things where there are other people around to distract.

Contents

1. What's Good About Them?

2. Good vs. Bad Group Invites

3. When to Use This Date

4. Should You Aim for Sex?

5. Wrap Up

In the typical scenario, where you have a girl who's already game to come out with you 1-on-1, this is the best advice for you. There's no need to overcomplicate things for yourself or introduce chaos by involving additional people. Make the date about you and her, and get everything else out of the way.

However... there are a few scenarios in which 'get her out 1-on-1' isn't practical or viable. And sometimes it just makes more sense to do something in a group.

For such cases, it can actually make sense to skip the 1-on-1, and invite a girl to a group event.

Because just like 1-on-1 dates, group invite dates have their upsides, too.

Housewarming Invitation Messages and Wording Ideas

Housewarming Invitation Messages: Being an owner of a new house or moving into a new place is a very important... More

The post Housewarming Invitation Messages and Wording Ideas appeared first on WishesMsg.

45 Best Religious Birthday Wishes – Happy Birthday Blessings

Religious Birthday Wishes Happy birthday, birthday girl! Celebrate everything that life has to offer today, and bring with you all the joy that you should have too! ======================== God walks…

The post 45 Best Religious Birthday Wishes – Happy Birthday Blessings appeared first on Events Greetings.

How to Talk Dirty to a Girl Without Being Awkward (Video)

Dirty talk is ESSENTIAL for a good time in bed. It’s not optional. It’s MANDATORY.

You arouse a woman’s mind as much as you arouse her pussy.

But if you do it wrong, it can seem a bit cringe worthy. I totally understand.

However, you can get away with a lot in the bedroom that doesn’t work in real life.

THE BEDROOM IS YOUR SECRET GARDEN.

So become a SAVAGE.

And I’ll teach you how to do it without being cringe worthy.

How to Start a Conversation on Tinder: 20 Must-Know Rules to Follow

Although talking on Tinder may not be as nerve-racking as talking in person, it is still nice to know how to start a conversation on Tinder.

At one time, this article would have been about how to approach a stranger at the bar. Nowadays, Tinder is the new bar. It is where you create connections, so learning how to start a conversation on Tinder is important.

Because, without face to face contact, the conversation really needs to be great in order for anything to come from it. So, how do you make it great?

Well, there are always options when it comes to starting a conversation on Tinder. You can be deep, funny, or totally original. What’s important is that you start your Tinder conversation in a way that feels true to you. [Read: How to use tinder – A guide for true love or a perfect hookup]

Why it is so important how you start a conversation on Tinder

You might think the opening sentence on Tinder is just a few words and what comes after is more important, but that is not always the case. In today’s culture, people want to feel a connection ASAP.

It doesn’t seem exactly fair but first impressions are important. If you don’t draw positive attention quickly, Tinder is full of more people. Some people, of course, will try to get to know you even if your opening line is “Hey.” Others will move on to find something a bit more unique.

Think of Tinder as a first date. Although it is virtual, you still want to put in the same effort you would on a date. Try to share something personal, ask something that sparks intrigue, or even make a joke.

Try not to let this put pressure on you though. There is no need to be worried or concerned that what you said wasn’t perfect. Not everyone will click with you and that is okay. Plus, just as they can move on, so can you.

That is the benefit of a dating app like Tinder, there is always someone else on the horizon. [Read: 8 great reasons online dating is worth a shot]

How to start a conversation on Tinder

Now that you know why knowing how to start a conversation on Tinder is so important,  you can go into it with boldness and originality.

Being able to start a conversation on Tinder is all about making an impact. You don’t want to go in with something that doesn’t require a response or can be answered with a simple yes or no.

So, here on some ideas you can use or just pull inspiration from.

#1 Respond to their profile. This is probably the easiest way to start a conversation on Tinder. Instead of trying to come up with something unique and original on your own, pull from what you already know about them.

If they mentioned they are into travel or photography, strike up a conversation about cameras or their favorite place to travel. [Read: How to start a conversation on Tinder and snag a date every time]

#2 Ask about one of their photos. Some people leave their bios blank which gives you a lack of material to work with, but there are always photos. Hopefully, they are not all selfies and you can ask about them.

Ask where their hiking photo was taken, how old their dog is, or anything else pertaining to a specific photo. They chose those specific photos to intrigue potential matches, so show them it worked.

#3 Play a game. You may have taken a break from using games to break the ice since the first day of high school, but these tricks work. They distract you from the fact that this is sort of awkward and just let you get to know each other.

Try something like Two truths and a Lie or 20 Questions.

#4 Quote a movie or TV show. This is a great way to see if your tastes line up. Ask them to guess where the quote is from or just see if they recognize it. You can use a line from your favorite show like The Office or classic movie like The Breakfast Club.

You can even copy a show like Master of None on Netflix. Take Aziz Ansari’s favorite line, “Going to Whole Foods, want me to pick you up anything?” [Read: 21 Tinder conversation starters that’ll intrigue anyone instantly]

#5 Ask what their dream date is. Whether you want to chat for a while first or meet up quickly, this is a great way to start a conversation on Tinder. You get to know the vibe they are going for and if it is something you would enjoy.

And if you want to meet up, it is a great segue. [Read: Online dating success? Meet your date in person soon]

#6 Ask about the most spontaneous thing they have ever done. Starting a conversation on Tinder with this question gets things off on a light note. You can talk about your bucket list and how adventurous you are or aren’t.

#7 Ask what they’re looking for. I know this seems obvious, but when it comes to knowing how to start a conversation on Tinder, not many people ask this until they meet or even later than that. If you are on Tinder for a hook up, make sure the person you’re interested in wants the same thing or else it will get complicated later.

#8 Ask their opinion on a classic debate. Do they prefer peanut butter or jelly? Do they hang the toilet paper over or under? These are things everyone has a feeling about one way or the other. Starting things off with a friendly debate always heats things up.

#9 Ask what best pickup line they’ve ever heard. This is sure to be a funny way to start a conversation on Tinder. You can trade hilarious or cheesy pickup lines. See which catches your fancy. [Read: 70 hilarious cheesy pick up lines that’ll get anyone laughing]

#10 What is the best show to binge? Television is a big part of pop culture today. Sharing your interests and preferences can let you know if you would get along. And even if this isn’t a match made in Netflix heaven, you might get some good TV recommendations out of it.

#11 What is their dream vacation? Just about everyone on Tinder says they love to travel, but that is quite a bit vague. Ask them where they would love to travel to. Then, ask if they have any plans to go there. And if you’ve been there, offer some pointers.

#12 Compliment them. This is always a go-to. You can compliment their smile, style, or bio. Just be sure to follow up that comment with a question like, “I love your style, how did you get so cool?” [Read: How to flirt and intrigue someone with only your written words]

#13 Use a GIF. Emojis and GIFs are at your disposal so use what you have. Ask a question and throw in a funny GIF or even a meme to help drive your point home.

#14 Ask a multiple choice question. This is something that I have recently seen. It is such a unique way to get to know someone. Instead of an open-ended question, ask something and give them options for an answer.

Ask them the vibe they like on weekends. Do they prefer to be a. lazy, b. party, c. productive, or d. all of the above.

#15 Check for typos. Proper grammar and spelling show intellect and also how much you care about what you are saying. Be sure to double check for typos and grammatical errors. I know it seems minute, but this is a real turn-off for a lot of people.

#16 Message when you have time to talk. Try not to message someone and start a conversation on your way to work or before you go to sleep. Message when you actually have the time to go back and forth and really carry out a conversation. [Read: 15 Tinder tips you cannot ignore if you ever want a date]

#17 Don’t get too personal too quickly. When it comes to learning how to start a conversation on Tinder, it can be tempting to open yourself up to someone when you feel a connection straight off the bat. Hold back at least a little bit. Although Tinder has formed some amazing bonds, there are still a lot of ghosters out there.

You do not want to tell someone everything about yourself only for them to disappear.

#18 Don’t use their name in your message. Apparently, some people find this to be sincere, but I think most people find it creepy. When someone says something like, “Hi Samantha, you’re really cute.” I don’t know why, but it is creepy to me.

Think about it. How often do you use someone’s name in a message to them?

#19 Only follow-up once. Sure, sometimes Tinder doesn’t notify people or they are busy and forget to respond. So, go ahead and follow-up. Do not resend the same message but add a meme or GIF about two to four hours after the initial message. If there is still no response, let it go. [Read: 6 rules double texting rules everyone needs to follow]

#20 Play it cool. Remember that the person you are starting a conversation with on Tinder is probably not your lifelong crush. It is someone that you thought looked cool from a few sentences and a few photos. Don’t freak out. There is no need to be nervous.

[Read: How to make yourself standout on Tinder with these conversation starters]

Now that you know how to start a conversation on Tinder, go out with confidence. Time to get yourself a Tinder date.

The post How to Start a Conversation on Tinder: 20 Must-Know Rules to Follow is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Message for Daughter To Show Love, Pride and Inspire Her

Message for Daughter : Daughters are the angels sent by God from heaven. If you are parents of a daughter,... More

The post Message for Daughter To Show Love, Pride and Inspire Her appeared first on WishesMsg.

Franco Lombardi – Gauging a Woman’s Comfort Level on Dates (Podcast)

Welcome back to Dating Mechanics, our podcast here on Girls Chase! Today once again I feature Franco, with whom I’ve done several podcasts – and they’ve turned out to be some of the most popular due to Franco’s special knowledge of dating and relationships. We met up in San Diego over New Years and talked about a girl’s comfort on dates, which is a sticking point I had late last year, where it was difficult to tell how comfortable a girl was on a date, which made it tough to move things forward.

Franco always tells me about his excellent track record on dates, as he was closing 9 out of 10 girls he would take on dates with him. What helps is his ability to gauge a girl’s comfort and where she is emotionally on a date.

Knowing a girl’s comfort level and emotions are key in the moment, as this allows you to determine what you need to do to move a date forward toward intimacy – and very importantly, when.

Girls also often give mixed signals to test a guy, and a good guy should know how to handle these tests as he moves the process along with a girl.

In this podcast, we talk about how to determine a girl’s comfort level early on a date, the adjustments in vibe we need to make to make her more comfortable, the adjustments we should make if an emotion is too strong, how to determine when a girl is comfortable enough for touch and what type, when to start and escalate touch, how to use sexual touch when she’s comfortable, and how to close at the end of the date – whether it’s just going for the kiss or pulling her home.

Here’s Franco…

How to Change Your Life: 12 Easy Steps for a Dramatic Life Makeover

Forrest Gump said, “Life is like a box of chocolates,” and you know the rest. You have more control than you think. Here’s how to change your life.

There is nothing more frustrating than knowing you want to make changes, and that you have to make changes, but not having the first clue about how to change your life.

Are you sitting there a little disillusioned with life and wondering if this is all there is? Maybe even considering how to change your life, but not really knowing if it’s possible. There is good news coming your way.

You can change your life whenever you want. It simply takes planning, openness, and a willingness to try. It doesn’t matter whether you want to make a full life overhaul or just change a few things here and there. Being open to trying new things is the first step, while committing a little time to soul-searching is another. [Read: How to learn to be vulnerable and welcome life in]

Are you ready to change your life?

Before I get into the process of learning how to change your life, ask yourself whether you want to make changes for you, or whether you simply feel you need to because someone else is. You see, the rise of social media is wonderful on so many levels, but it’s quite damaging on others.

You see your friends posting about their wonderful life on Facebook and Instagram and can lead you to wonder why you’re not traveling around the world every few months, why you’re not being asked to all these parties, and why you’re not rustling up a brand new recipe to post to your friends every single evening. How do they find the time?

Don’t believe everything you see on social media. Most of the time, this is simply people posting falsities to make others feel bad, which in turn makes them feel good. This is part and parcel of human behavior, and not a particular pleasant side to humanity either. Unfortunately, we all do it, whether we’re aware of it or not.

For that reason, make sure that you are embarking on changes for you, because you want to do it, not because you want to litter your social media feeds with killer posts to gain likes. [Read: How to avoid the danger of social media insecurity]

How to change your life: 12 little steps for a dramatic change

Change your life for the right reasons—for you!

#1 Say ‘yes’ more. Make it your aim to say ‘yes’ more than you say ‘no.’ I’m not suggesting you say ‘yes’ to every single invite or idea that comes your way, but make a concerted effort to take more risks. Go to more social events, take people up on suggestions, and see where it leads you. Who knows, you might meet a new love interest, a new friend, or find a new job in the middle of it all!

#2 Kick out unhealthy habits. You will instantly change your life by kicking out habits which are unhealthy and damaging. This means no more smoking, no more excessive drinking, no drug taking, no being lazy, no self-deprecating talk, and basically focusing on healthy coping mechanisms, as opposed to unhealthy ones. You’ll feel better as a result! [Read: How to learn these 12 simple, daily self-love habits]

#3 Focus on health and wellbeing. While kicking out unhealthy habits, focus on your overall health and wellbeing. Make sure you eat a healthy, balanced diet, drink more water, cut down on takeaways, buy into moderation, and exercise. Focus on your mental health too. Take out anything that’s bothering you and learn how to manage stress and pressure healthily. [Read: How to be emotionally stable and find your zone of perfect calmness]

#4 Spend more time with those you love. I guarantee you that at the end of your days, the biggest regret you will have is that you didn’t spend enough time with your loved ones. It’s time to change this! You’re not too tired to go out, just go.

Make sure date night is a thing which is never cancelled. Head to your parents’ house for Sunday lunch without fail. Talk to those friends you have lost touch with. Focus on relationships, not material things.

#5 Work to live, don’t live to work. I’m all for finding a job you love, which gives you something to pour your effort and creativity into, it’s something I love with the job I do, but I also know about work and life balance. Make sure that your job isn’t taking over your life. You work in order to live, you should not be living in order to work!

#6 Identify your dreams and make a plan. What is your bucket list? If you haven’t got one, it’s time to write one! Figure out what your dreams are, and I’m talking abut the realistic ones. You’re not going to be discovered by NASA with zero experience! Identify the dreams you have and work towards putting a plan together to make them a reality. It might take time, it might even take a lot of time, but even baby steps are progress. [Read: The couples bucket list – 20 things every couple has to try]

#7 Do something new every day. This doesn’t have to be anything huge. It can be something as simple as trying a new hairstyle or cooking a new dish for dinner. Just make sure that every single day you try something new. By doing this, you’ll probably find new hobbies to continue pursuing, and you have no idea where they might lead! [Read: 15 ways to discover self-love and happiness]

#8 Accept yourself and your past. Most of us have some kind of baggage that we hang onto. We don’t realize that over time it makes us bitter and holds us back. Let go of your past by accepting it and moving on. At the same time, accept yourself for who you are, you’re wonderful just as you are!

By doing this, you’re allowing yourself to fly in so many ways, without holding yourself back with the negativity of past experiences and false expectations.

#9 Dare to date outside of your ‘type.’ If you’re guilty of sticking to the same ‘type’ when you date, you’re missing out on the people you’re filtering! Remember, opposites attract, so dare to date someone you wouldn’t normally consider and see where it leads. You might just find a partner of your dreams!

#10 Let go of grudges. I mentioned accepting your past, but along the same lines as that comes letting go of grudges. There is nothing positive about holding a grudge. All it does is breed negativity and contempt. Let it go, accept it, forgive it, and move on. You’ll feel so much lighter as a result.

#11 Escape the negative mindset. Humans are hard-wired to be negative first and positive second. You can change that by actively turning your negative thoughts into positive ones! Reframing is a popular cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) method. It takes time and practice, but you simply come up with a positive alternative for every negative thought you have. Then, repeat it until it becomes second nature. Your life will change for the better! [Read: 14 easy mantras that will transform your life]

#12 Really understand what matters in life. We put so much emphasis on material things and trying to please other people, that we fail to realize what life is all about. The most important things are family, friends, relationships, health, experiences, and happiness.

It has nothing to do with the latest iPhone or laptop, and everything to do with happiness and social connections. By knowing what is really important, you can channel your energy in the right direction.

[Read: A roadmap for emotional wellness and living life with intention]

If you’ve been wondering how to change your life with no idea where to start, these 12 points should give you food for thought. Remember, this is your novel, so make sure you write a good one!

The post How to Change Your Life: 12 Easy Steps for a Dramatic Life Makeover is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.