Relationship Rules: 30 Must-Know Tips to Live Your Best Love Life!

Similar to everything in life, there are rules you’re advised to follow. By applying these relationship rules, you reduce your chances of getting hurt.

Relationship rules don’t have to be boring and overwhelming. Love consists of both the good and bad, and rules prevent you from having the worst relationship experience. While pain and heartbreak are both inevitable, the right relationship rules guide you to experience love like a bed of roses.

It won’t be perfect, but it won’t destroy and sabotage your sanity entirely. The thing is, love is the most beautiful and extraordinary experience in the world, and the right relationship rules help you in achieving and living that dream love life.

[Read: 16 commonly believed relationship tips that ruin your love life]

The right relationship rules for successful love

There are a few relationship rules that can change a drifting relationship into a romantic one. Love isn’t as easy as the movies make it seem because it takes consistent effort and hard work to make a relationship last.

Not the kind of effort where it feels like a job, but the kind where you actually want to make the effort. Using the right kind of relationship rules, you will have the wisdom to make your relationship work.

After all, isn’t that what everyone wants – to prove that love can actually last a lifetime? Someone once said that falling in love should be effortless. True, falling in love is easy, but staying in love always needs a bit of work.

[Read: How to have a good relationship that gets better with each new day]

Why are relationship rules important?

Without relationship rules, you’ll lack guidance and wisdom on what’s the right and wrong way of taking care of your relationship. While there’s no one-size-fits-all approach in making a relationship last, these relationship rules are often agreed by the majority that these are the right approach.

Whether it’s seeking a healthy relationship or making your relationship last forever, rules are very beneficial in this situation. You might not realize it right away, but the lack of rules can also cause a lack of structure and direction in your relationship.

As a result, it becomes complacent and negligent, which leads to a relationship falling apart. By knowing the advisable relationship rules to follow, you’d be taking care of your relationship better. And everyone involved will be a lot happier too! [Read: 15 rules to be a good partner in a relationship & wow your lover]

30 relationship rules that matter more than all others

Follow these relationship rules in your own relationship, irrespective of whether it’s a new or old romance. As long as you’re committed to creating a better relationship, you’ll have no trouble creating a magical experience out of love.

1. Love your partner unconditionally

Try your best to love your partner unconditionally even if it seems hard not to be selfish. The very definition of love is to make someone happy the best way you can, even if it means sacrificing a part of your own happiness.

More than joy, love is also about sacrifice. Love your partner without expecting anything in return, and they’ll return the favor by loving you in the purest way possible. [Read: How to love unconditionally – Stop screwing up and start loving instead]

2. Look from your partner’s perspective

Sometimes, we’re so focused on following through with our own perspective that we forget to see things from our partner’s perspective.

Think from your partner’s perspective when it comes to matters of the heart. A relationship is all about partnership and in that partnership, you need to be open to their perspective as well – not just your own. [Read: How to develop empathy and master the art of growing a real heart]

3. End an argument immediately

End an argument as soon as possible, even if hugging your partner is the last thing on your mind. In taking note of these relationship rules, remember that love is a choice rather than a decision.

If you want your relationship to flourish and thrive, choose your partner over winning the argument. It’s pointless to prolong an argument if you end up losing your partner altogether. [Read: How to fight fair in a relationship and grow closer]

4. Make love regularly

Make love regularly, but never allot time for it. Scheduling time for sex makes it seem like a chore that can start to become a bore. Sex should become an activity you both enjoy to become intimate and connected with one another.

It shouldn’t feel like a routine, but it shouldn’t be done rarely either. Make sure you find the right balance in making love with your partner.

5. Have effective communication

Communication is the key to any working relationship, so if you want your relationship to really beat the odds, you need to learn to communicate. This means even when conflict is present, you don’t shy away from confrontation.

Communicate with each other and grow together in love, but never grow apart with a lack of communication as the years pass by. [Read: How to communicate in a relationship – 14 steps to a better love]

6. Give each other space

Couples often give each other space so you can miss one another healthily and you can do your individual things. Learn to give space to each other to become better individuals. Even the closest of relationships need some alone time to miss each other now and then.

There’s nothing bad with having space as it can help you love each other better when do you come together again. Of course, there’s still such thing as healthy space and too much space. [Read: How to give space in a relationship the right way so you feel close instead of drifting apart]

7. Don’t take each other for granted

One of the most important relationship rules to take note of is to never take your partner for granted. This is the easiest way to fall prey to affairs and arguments.

You’ll create a lot of friction and conflict in your relationship when you always assume they’ll be there for you all the time without appreciating their efforts.

8. White lies aren’t a bad thing

Say a white lie when you need to, especially if it’s a little lie that won’t change your relationship, but will make your partner feel happy.

Of course, it’s not an excuse to make a habit of saying a white lie *by all means, tell her how she looks better in that other dress!* It’s okay to do so occasionally, but not to the point where it’s all you say.

9. Never shy away from positive criticism

As long as you say it constructively, it’ll help your partner become a better person. Don’t feel offended when they say something you can use to improve yourself. Remember that constructive criticism is a good thing and isn’t something they’re saying to put you down.

You never know, your partner could have a point and you can use that feedback to grow. Would you rather be comforted with a lie or be offended by the truth? [Read: The worst mistakes couples make in a relationship]

10. Always be there for them

You’re the person they should run to when something happens to them. Whether they have a good or bad day, always be there for them. Tough times are the most frustrating phase of a relationship.

Stand by your partner, and when the storm ends, your love will shine brighter. This is one of the relationship rules to keep in mind as nobody wants a partner who leaves when things get tough. [Read: How to know if someone is right for you – 32 clear signs you’ve found the one]

11. Show affection publicly; argue privately

Never argue in public, but indulge in public display of affection. Any misunderstanding or conflict between you should be discussed behind the doors so you don’t end up embarrassing your partner.

However, don’t hesitate to express your love through simple physical gestures. Hold their hand, put your arm around them, kiss them! [Read: How to be a genuinely happy couple that’s envied by all other couples]

12. Keep dating each other

Just because you’ve been together for years, doesn’t mean you need to stop dating them. In fact, this is one of the relationship rules that will keep your sparks and chemistry alive. Don’t forget to have occasional date nights intentionally, not just when there’s nothing else to do.

Date nights are how you can spend quality time with your partner without any interruptions or distractions.

13. Take care of yourself

Don’t get lazy in your relationship. Just because you’ve been together for so long, doesn’t mean you should stop trying to look attractive. Get those abs, exercise, and do whatever it takes to maintain your attractiveness.

Your physical features might not be the only reason they fell for you, but it does play a part. [Read: How to be sexy, look sexy and feel sexy without even trying too hard]

14. Compliment your partner

Compliments are the best way to thank a special someone for the effort they’ve taken for you, however small it may be. It’s simple yet effective enough in making their day and reminding them how much you adore them.

15. Celebrate the special days

Birthdays and anniversaries may repeat themselves too many times, but it’s these milestones that create memories. These special occasions mark another step in your relationship, and it’s worth celebrating.

It’s also your rare opportunity to show your partner how much you appreciate everything they’ve done and how they’re the best thing to happen to you. It’s one of the underrated relationship rules, but equally as significant as the others in this list. [Read: The 25 best relationship topics to talk about if you want to be happy in love]

16. Don’t put your partner down

Never intentionally try to make your partner feel bad or look bad. It’ll leave a lasting scar that can hurt the relationship. The only thing you should do is lift them and support them every way you can.

You can give constructive feedback, but don’t intentionally attack their insecurities and weaknesses. Otherwise, you might as well prepare to lose them.

17. Learn to forgive

Forgiveness is the one relationship rule you should never ignore. The key to any long-lasting relationship is forgiving each other over and over throughout the span of your relationship.

Stop holding grudges, no matter how easy this tendency is. We’re not perfect and you should expect that both of you are going to make several mistakes throughout your relationship. [Read: How to forgive someone: 15 positive ways to unburden your mind]

18. Respect your partner wholeheartedly

Respect is another one of the relationship rules that people choose to ignore. However, respect is the foundation for both trust and love. If you don’t trust your partner, then how can you expect to feel the love?

19. Be okay with your partner having other admirations

Your partner will have several crushes even if they’re committed to you – and that’s okay. Understand that your partner can have crushes on others too. It’s a difficult thought, but if you can admire someone else, so can your partner. [Read: How to handle a crush when you’re in a relationship with someone]

20. Trust your partner – and your gut

Trust is everything in a relationship. Without trusting them wholeheartedly, then it’s not a relationship that can work.

However, you should also learn to trust your gut when needed. If something doesn’t feel right, go with your gut instinct. [Read: How to build trust in a relationship and make it last]

21. Don’t badmouth each other

This seems like common sense, but a lot of couples end up attacking and cursing one another in anger. This is exactly what leads to toxic relationships, which is why it’s one of the important relationship rules to follow. Never grumble or badmouth each other even if you’re tempted to, out of anger or frustration.

22. Always spend quality time together

Quality time doesn’t always have to be exhausting or elaborate. Sometimes, it can be something simple like a homemade dinner or maybe running errands together. Quality time is how you make one another feel loved and rekindle your chemistry.

Learn to spend quality time with each other. There’s no better way to fall more in love with each other as the relationship grows.

23. Behave like children now and then

A few pillow fights or cute wrestles can never hurt anyone. Not only is it fun, but it can help both of you enjoy the relationship. There’s no better feeling than having a pillow fight or laughing until you cry with your partner.

24. Be spontaneous with your affection

Don’t always wait for special occasions or moments to express your love. Spontaneous surprises are always happier than planned surprises.

It doesn’t have to be Valentine’s day or your anniversary to spoil them with an elaborate dinner or amazing gift. In fact, the best feeling is to be surprised on an ordinary day. [Read: The 25 sweetest romantic gestures for everyday life]

25. Stop comparing

This is one of those important relationship rules, so pay close attention! Stop comparing your relationship with others as no relationship is going to be alike, ever.

Instead of learning from someone else’s relationship, learn from your own relationship’s successes and failures. [Read: Self concept – What it is and what makes it very important for your happiness]

26. Be their best friend

The best feeling is when your partner isn’t just the love of your life, but also your best friend. Having a friendship outside the relationship avoids a lot of fights and conflicts. This means they understand you more than anyone else, even when you’re being extremely difficult.

27. Watch how they say, “I love you”

These powerful three words don’t always need to be said out loud. They can say it in the form of gestures, quality time, physical touch, or even gifts.

This is otherwise known as love language. Everyone has different ways of showing love, so pay close attention. [Read: How to show someone you love them: 41 sure-fire ways]

28. Don’t make decisions when you’re angry or upset

Our negative emotions are so powerful that they can cloud our judgment and logic. One of the big relationship rules is to not make decisions based on your anger or frustration.

Don’t walk out that door, break up with them, or curse them. Most likely, you’ll regret everything by the time you feel more logical.

29. Don’t try to rise above your partner

A power struggle is often seen in relationships. When taking note of these relationship rules, remember that a relationship will always be about partnership and friendship – nothing else.

You’re not superior or inferior to your partner. What you lack, the other makes up for. Always keep this in mind before trying to control your partner. [Read: 14 ways to overcome power struggles in a relationship]

30. Choose each other every day

As much as love starts as a feeling, it develops into a choice. Relationships last not because you’ll always feel the butterflies in your stomach, but because you make a constant decision to love them each day.

Even when they frustrate or irritate you, the choice lies in making things work and not leaving just because things are difficult. That’s what love is.

[Read: Love is a choice: Why only you can make love happen]

So, what are relationship rules for?

Relationship rules exist not to make your relationship boring and rigid, but to increase the chances of it lasting and growing healthier. Without the proper structure and guidance, there’s no way of knowing if you’re doing the right or wrong things. For all you know, you could be pushing your partner away without realizing it.

[Read: What is true love? 22 signs of real love to know if your love is real]

These relationship rules could seem simple, but following them can make all the difference between a romantic relationship and a failed affair. They can transform neglect and complacency into romance and commitment.

The post Relationship Rules: 30 Must-Know Tips to Live Your Best Love Life! is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

What Are You Looking For in a Relationship? 25 Qs To Ask Yourself

When figuring out what are you looking for in a relationship, there’s no right or wrong answer. Every person’s standards are different and that’s okay. 

When deciding what are you looking for in a relationship, there’s no perfect answer. Everyone wants different things in a relationship. And no two people are looking for the same things in a relationship. Sometimes, what we think we want ends up being the very thing that is the worst for us.

This is why it’s very important to stay grounded in what you really want. While physical standards are very much valid, it’s more important to ask yourself questions in terms of relationship compatibility, emotional and mental intimacy, and chemistry.

More than the physical aspects, these are the things that determine the longevity of any relationship. 

Why is it important to know what you want in a relationship?

If you don’t know what you want, then how are you going to know if you’ve found the right person? Being indecisive of your standards is exactly how people end up in the wrong relationships. You can’t just go through the motions of a relationship as it comprises a significant aspect of your life.

Knowing what you want gives you insight on which people to choose, rather than just giving your heart to anyone who shows an interest in you. By asking what are you looking for in a relationship, you know deep inside the kind of partner you want for yourself.

This means that anyone who doesn’t come close to this standard isn’t worth your time, energy, or attention. Knowing what you want also saves you a lot of time you would spend with the wrong person if you weren’t so clear on your standards. 

[Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly!]

25 questions that’ll give you the answers you need

Before you start dating and looking for someone, you need to ask yourself all the right questions. Otherwise, there won’t be any indication if they’re right for you or not. In this feature, we’ll be listing down the right questions on what are you looking for in a relationship.

1. Do you think a relationship is a partnership, or two people sharing space?

If you are someone who wants to be involved in every aspect and your partner is not, it can leave you feeling lonely, as if the other person is being secretive.

You need to ask yourself whether sharing a space is something that’s important for you because if it is, you need to be with someone who shares this importance. In fact, this can even cause significant problems in the relationship further on. [Read: How to give space to each other without drifting apart]

2. Do you want to have traditional roles?

We live in the 21st century, which means women are no longer required to stay at home to fulfill household chores. If staying at home is what you want, then good for you!

However, there are women who want to climb the corporate ladder.

If you are more traditional, and he wants you to be the breadwinner, it may spell trouble in paradise. This is why it’s important to know what are you looking for in a relationship early on. [Read: Types of feminism – Can’t we all just agree to disagree?]

3. Are you someone who wants your own time?

Time is a very important aspect, for some more than others. If you’ve always been independent but your partner feels otherwise, this could be a problem.

In fact, this could be the foundation for all your fights in the future. An independent person and a dependent person simply don’t meld well together.

4. Are you all about sharing or do you like to keep things separate?

If you want to keep your money and financial decisions separate, but your significant other is all about combining resources, it may come across as selfish or make you seem like you are keeping your distance.

You need to talk about this or at least find a middle ground if you want the relationship to work out. A lot of people believe that relationships should be all about sharing every single thing, but that’s actually not mandatory in relationships. [Read: 20 questions you HAVE to ask each other before getting married]

5. Lovey-dovey is all good at first, but are you looking for a PDA-display relationship?

With the exception of the first few months, are you comfortable with PDA or would you rather keep affection when you’re both alone? Of course, when you start out, you want to be as close as possible no matter where you are.

As you mature, you might start to feel there is a time and place for PDA. People have different needs for physical closeness so make sure that both you and your partner are on the same page. Otherwise, one could feel rejected or offended. [Read: What is PDA in a relationship? The full guide to every aspect of affection in love]

6. Does it matter how much money they make?

Money is a more significant aspect than you think. If one of you makes more money, are you both okay with that concept? It’s entirely possible if they make more money than you, that you’re not comfortable with it, which then causes arguments and even a power struggle.

This is why it’s important to know what are you looking for in a relationship. If you think their minimum wage job is just a stepping stone, but they think it is their life’s achievement, this can pose a real problem.

7. Do you want someone to rely on you or be independent?

Let’s not deny this – it feels good to feel needed and wanted. However, there are people who want independent partners, especially if they’re independent themselves.

Do you want to be the type of couple making decisions together and leaning on one another, or the type that does things to care just for themselves? In the long run, if you end up making a decision without consulting the other, this could offend your partner if you have opposing beliefs. [Read: Am I codependent? 15 signs you’re clingy and overstepping boundaries]

8. Will you want to make joint decisions or go it alone?

No matter how many years you’ve been together, some people just aren’t comfortable making joint decisions. You don’t want to be in too deep in the relationship before you realize you have different ways of making decisions.

To some people, making major decisions without discussion feels like you don’t care about their opinion, or that you are operating all on your own. [Read: 10 decisions you should never let your partner make for you]

9. Who should be the disciplinarian if you have children?

Good cop and bad cop only work when one wants to be in each role. If you are both too stringent, then there could be a power play. If you are both too lenient, you may have a house out of control.

Also, if one of you has a traditional mindset, that could lead to expectations for being the disciplinarian. Make sure you discuss this before having children, or early on in the relationship. 

10. Is family important to you?

If a family is important to you, it would be a complete nightmare to date someone with opposing values. Remember, whoever you marry, you marry their family too. If you aren’t the big family type, it may make you miserable to have family picnics once a month.

Of course, compromise is always possible but be sure to talk about this in knowing what are you looking for in a relationship. [Read: 6 practical ways to *put up* deal with difficult in-laws]

11. Who should wear the pants in the family?

If you are a traditional person and believe one person should steer the ship, then finding someone who agrees with you is very important. This is another aspect that can cause a power struggle if you’re not careful enough.

Especially when both of you have dominating personalities, expect this to be a problem. After all, you can’t have two captains unless that is something you agree upon early on.

12. Are you a saver or a live-in-the-moment person?

If you think you don’t care about the spending habits in your relationship, think again. A lot of couples argue about this aspect more often than you think, especially when they aren’t okay with their partner’s spending habits.

If you’re a saver and your partner is a spender, you make quite the match from opposing sides. It becomes a lot more important when you go to fill your gas tank, and your significant other has spent the monthly take-home on a Gucci handbag. [Read: How to talk about money with your partner without fighting about it]

13. Do you want to save for retirement or YOLO?

People who save and those who live in the moment are inherently different in many ways, not just money matters. There are people who save for retirement funds, and people who say screw it and just go with the flow.

Make sure you choose someone who’s compatible with you in this aspect or someone who’s okay with you being from opposing ends. 

14. How much time do you want to spend together?

This question on what are you looking for in a relationship might not be as focused on as matters like money, but it’s just as big a deal-breaker. If you’re someone who values quality time but you’re with someone who doesn’t share that love language or doesn’t give it to you, it’s going to lead to neglect and resentment.

If you want a guy who is going to give up his frolicking days for you, make it clear upfront and find someone who is willing to. [Read: 15 reasons why most couples get bored with their relationship]

15. Do you want someone who thinks you are hotter than them? 

Having someone chase you around like a puppy idolizing you is very flattering at first. However, people who adore you may overestimate your importance and downplay their own.

This can also smother you as they might cling to you and become extra needy, even when not necessary. This is an underrated thing to consider when dating someone, but it’s just as valuable. [Read: 5 big reasons why loving someone too much kills the love really fast]

16. Do you want to play together or do your own thing?

Some couples like to play together; some like to meet up after the play is done. Make sure you know which one you are before committing. You might not realize this initially, but it’s a bigger deal than you think. 

17. Are you looking for long-term love or a more casual time-waster?

Unlike most of the questions above, this is something you need to know right away before getting too invested in someone. They might want something casual and you’re expecting a long-term commitment. Before you say anything, no, you can’t change their minds.

People don’t change, and if you want something real and lasting, you have to be honest upfront. If they can’t commit, you have to move along instead of beating yourself up trying to change their mind.

18. Do you want to have a relationship based on sex or one where friendship rules?

While you can have both these aspects, there’s always one that will rise above. Would you want it to be friendship or sex? If you want to have a purely sexual relationship, but they want you to be there to support them and hold their hand during the difficult parts, then you don’t want the same things out of the relationship.

This is another crucial reason why it’s important to know what are you looking for in a relationship – before you’re in too deep. [Read: Sexually incompatible? The unlucky signs that confirm you two have bad sex all the time]

19. Do you really want a sensitive guy?

Most girls say that they want a sensitive guy, but can we be honest? There is nothing more unattractive than a guy who cries more often than we do.

Make sure you know what you really want before dating someone who’s more sensitive than you are. Be sure if you want someone who is highly sensitive and has more of a feminine touch, if that is really what you want.

20. Are you really looking for a bad guy?

Most girls are attracted to the bad guy, and that’s for a reason. A bad guy is only good when he is a bad guy to everyone but you. Sometimes we think a bad guy can be changed and will be a good guy to just us.

However, really consider what you’re getting yourself into before committing. You can’t change a person *unless he wants to change himself,* so why bother? 

21. Do you want someone who only listens?

We all want someone to listen to what we have to say, but if all they do is listen and are your “yes, dear,” then it can feel more like they simply don’t care. While there are people who want a genuine listener *especially if you’re a talker yourself*, it’s hard to be with someone who doesn’t contribute anything to the conversation.

In knowing what are you looking for in a relationship, really ask yourself if you’re okay with dating a listener. Do you want someone who is going to allow you to wallow or someone who is going to bring out the best in you? The choice is yours. [Read: 23 types of relationships to clearly define your love life]

22. Do you want a stay-at-home partner?

This all goes back to traditional norms in the relationship. Are you really okay with someone who’s probably less ambitious than you? He does the dishes and household chores, but you do all the working and hustling.

Are you okay with the idea of being exhausted from work, only to find your partner just playing video games? Be careful what you think you want from someone.

If they do nothing but wait on you hand and foot, what could they possibly bring to the table at the end of the day but a warm dinner?

23. Are you okay with having opposing beliefs?

We’re all entitled to have our personal beliefs. Maybe you believe in God, or maybe you don’t care about religion. However, this can be a huge deal-breaker in relationships if you have opposing beliefs.

Are you okay with a partner that believes in different things than you? What belief system do you plan to raise your potential children on? This question will save you a lot of unnecessary pain further on in the relationship. [Read: What does being compatible actually mean in a relationship?]

24. Are you okay with a temperamental partner?

Believe it or not, some people have the worst anxieties and panic attacks when their partner expresses anger. If you’re someone who grew up in a household where problems were talked through rather than expressed in any form of rage, this could cause a problem if your partner has anger issues.

You need to work on a compromise or decide early on if you can date them. Most often, this never works out. 

25. Do you need a communicative and confrontational partner?

Communication is the key to any relationship, but some people just aren’t as vocal and confrontational. Normally, a communicative person and a non-communicative person don’t blend well especially in arguments.

Reflect whether this is important to you because if it is, it can leave you feeling neglected and ignored when your partner isn’t expressing their feelings vocally. 

[Read: 6 reasons people have a fear of confrontation]

So, what are you looking for in a relationship?

We all have different standards and wants in a relationship. To find someone who fulfills those wants and needs, you need to ask yourself the important questions before diving in too deep with them. 

[Read: How to have a good relationship that gets better with each new day]

Make sure you’re realistic in asking what are you looking for in a relationship. Only you can have all the answers on what you truly want and need when dating someone. 

The post What Are You Looking For in a Relationship? 25 Qs To Ask Yourself is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

What Does It Mean When a Guy Calls You Cute? These 25 Things!

When a guy calls you cute, it’s possible to have questions running through your mind. Keep reading to find out what does it mean when a guy calls you cute.

If you like a guy, and he describes you as “cute,” is that really something you should be flattered about? What does it mean when a guy calls you cute?

Being called cute is normally reserved for people and things that are adorable, so is he referring to your physical features? Or, does he maybe find your personality cute?

As a woman, you want to hear words that describe you like hot, gorgeous, delicious. Being called cute? It just doesn’t fall in the desirable category. Cute is what you’d describe a cute puppy video or maybe a friend, but maybe not someone you’re attracted to. Right?

[Read: How to look cute – 25 ways to exude cuteness and melt any guy’s heart]

What does it mean when a guy calls you cute?

Cute is something more than just the way that you look. Cute is an adjective that is more about the total package than simply how pretty you are. Every guy thinks they want a gorgeous woman wrapped around their arm, but what they don’t understand is that cute girls are the most attractive women on earth!

There’s just something unique when a guy calls you cute, and he’s not just referring to your physical looks. If you’re asking what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, it’s often a compliment. He’s trying to say he appreciates your personality more than anything else. *which you should be blushing at if you like him!*

Another possible reason he called you cute is that he finds you really attractive, but generally wants to tone it down because he doesn’t want to sound overly sexual or perverted!

Maybe he’s shy or doesn’t want to seem too direct about his compliment, so using cute is a very subtle way of doing that.

It’s highly possible he doesn’t want to come off too strong and offend you, so instead of using words like hot or sexy, he uses cute instead.

Lastly, maybe you look good but he’s at a loss for words, so he opted for cute instead! The bottom line is, being called cute really isn’t a bad thing! [Read: 25 things guys say when they like you – Lines that really mean a lot more]

What’s the difference between being called cute vs gorgeous?

Between both of these, cute is a much better compliment as it can refer to both your personality and physical appearance. On the other hand, if you’re called gorgeous, they’re only referring to the way you look.

Being called cute is a much better compliment as they’re also acknowledging the beauty of your personality as well as your outer beauty. The reason why cute isn’t often used as a compliment is that people often focus on your physical appearance.

After all, it’s the first thing you often see when you meet someone. However, when someone interacts with you and finds you cute, they’re complimenting you as a whole.

[Read: The guy’s view on what’s cute vs. sexy about a girl]

25 advantages that cute has over gorgeous

Cute girls rule! They are not only pretty, but kind and smart too. When a guy is looking for a girl to be in a relationship with, the cute girls are the ones who last. In this feature, we’ll be discussing 25 things on what does it mean when a guy calls you cute.

1. You don’t always have to be perfect

By definition, cute things are not perfect. It is in their imperfection where the “cuteness” is found. If you’re wondering what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, it’s your imperfection they find adorable.

This means they find your imperfections endearing! [Read: 13 charming ways to be more approachable to guys]

2. You know you’re fun to be around

Cute girls are the ones always having fun. They’re not stiff or boring to be around. They’re the opposite of wallflowers or posers, but they’re the life of the party.

This is why when you’re asking what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, it’s genuinely a compliment than anything else!

3. You have a cheerful attitude

There’s nothing cute or admirable about someone who’s bitchy and stiff. If someone says you’re cute, it means you have a cheery attitude, not a stuck-up one. Your optimism and positivity are your most defining traits so being called cute is really a matter of noticing those traits.

It just means he really admires your cheerful outlook on the world. [Read: 10 sure signs you’re a bitch and don’t even know it]

4. Your personality is likely chill

Cute girls are not high-strung, and they don’t get upset about every little thing. You go with the flow of the world and you don’t find the need to control everything and everyone around you.

Even if something goes against your wishes, you accept it with grace. That’s honestly a cute personality! Your attitude is just right, and every guy wants to be around you.

5. You’re not high maintenance

When you’re high-maintenance, guys tend to get exhausted eventually because let’s admit it, who wants a high-maintenance woman?

If you’re wondering what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, he means you know how just to roll with it, don’t take things too seriously, and can just go with the flow. [Read: 30 signs of a low maintenance girl that separates her from a snooty diva]

6. You can go from makeup-free to heels and be a totally different person

If a guy calls you cute, he has probably only seen the casual side of you. This is your window of opportunity to show you’re also full of surprises and can rock both a casual and hot look!

This means you can go from a t-shirt and sweatpants look to a full make-up, bodycon dress, and heels kind of look. Now, how cute is that?

Cute girls have a wide range of personality styles and looks and are way more textured than someone who is just there to look at. [Read: 15 signs you’re a high maintenance woman]

7. You have a wonderful smile

Do you know what isn’t cute? A girl who never smiles or knows how to have fun. A smile is a cute girl’s best feature so if you’re asking what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, he’s referring to your smile! This is a much better compliment than being called gorgeous.

8. You get along with people

Girls who can’t get along with other people, especially other girls, are anything but cute. There’s nothing admirable about not knowing how to socialize or interact with others.

Typically, a girl who’s labeled as cute can get along with anyone because they aren’t jealous, trying to prove anything, or putting others down to feel good about themselves.

Even with a guy you like, you know how to be likable and to connect with his group of friends. That’s really cute!

9. You aren’t a Debby Downer

There is nothing cute about someone who’s never happy. This is why happy girls are perceived as more admirable than those who are always miserable or constantly feel sorry for themselves. Even in a bad situation, you don’t make those around you miserable just because you are.

Cuteness is choosing to be happy, regardless of your situation! This is why other people are drawn to you – because of that admirable personality of yours. [Read: How to be happy in life and live life to the fullest]

10. Cute can be hot, but hot girls are rarely cute

Cute does not negate that you are hot. You can be hot AND cute. However, when you’re called hot, that’s all you ever are. Hotness is focused on your body and physical appearance, while cuteness is everything you are.

So if someone is calling you cute, don’t assume he doesn’t also think that you’re hot.

11. You are the girl that mother-in-laws dream of

Cute girls get along with mother-in-laws. Why? They are respectful and roll with it. As a cute girl, you’re generally likable by mother-in-laws and even if they don’t like you, your charm is often enough to deal with that situation.

You see, cute girls don’t need to please everyone and that’s the beauty of who they are.

12. You’re more marriage material

Do you know the real reason why guys rarely use the word ‘cute’ as a compliment? Most likely, when he calls you cute, it means you’re marriage material! A cute girl is real and really someone you want to spend the rest of your life with.

She’s everything you could dream of and possibly more. Being cute isn’t just having an admirable face and body, but it’s having the whole package. [Read: Are you wifey material? 25 signs that prove it instantly]

13. You will age with grace

A cute girl is naturally pretty and doesn’t have to go to great lengths to make herself appear to be someone she’s not. If you’re wondering what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, he’s complimenting your natural beauty.

This means you don’t have to try too hard to look beautiful or gorgeous – because you already are! As the years progress, one of the common compliments a cute girl will get is how it’s like she hasn’t aged at all.

14. No one expects you to be someone you aren’t

Everyone loves the cute girl because of who she really is, not someone she is pretending to be. As a cute girl, you’re nothing less than authentic and real.

In a world trying to pretend to be someone else, this is a very attractive trait. Guys date the cute girl because they know there’s no hidden agenda with her.

15. You are independent

Being cute also means being sassy, independent, sarcastic, and witty. Basically, the entire package! You don’t need to be with someone 24/7, as you’re independent like that.

Even as you appreciate being with others, you’re also incredibly independent. Cute can have a bit of the spunk that you aren’t expecting, but love, to see. [Read: 25 things guys find sexy and attractive about a girl]

16. You have your own style and aren’t defined by trendy

Cute girls wear what they want and look good in what they wear. They’re not defined by whatever fashion trend is on the rise lately nor do they try their hardest to engage in that trend.

They have their own authentic style, and it’s one of the admirable things about cute girls. As a cute girl, this means you can completely rock a simple top and sweatpants without a problem!

17. You look as beautiful waking up as you do going to bed

A natural beauty, you wake up looking as beautiful as when you go to bed. You save a lot of shock from guys by not looking completely different when you got into bed with them versus waking up in the morning.

Again, cute girls are authentic and you shouldn’t expect otherwise! You are just you: beautiful, charming, and sweet. [Read: 20 sexy things that turn guys on every single time]

18. You don’t take yourself too seriously

Cute girls aren’t likely to set the world on fire nor are they likely to wage war. They live life the best way they can, which is to not take themselves too seriously.

They thrive in living in the moment instead of destroying themselves changing the world. Not that there’s anything wrong with standing up for a change, but balance is really everything!

19. You can be one of the guys and totally hang

A cute girl throws on a jersey and pretends to watch any game or be any team’s fan. Comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt, a cute girl can be one of the guys with no problem.

This is mainly what makes cute girls the best company to be around! They aren’t trying to impress anyone or seem awkward because they don’t fit in. [Read: Hotness decoder – How to know for sure if someone finds you attractive]

20. You aren’t worried about breaking a nail

Cute girls are in the mix. They aren’t concerned about skinny dipping because of ruining their makeup or not wanting to hike because they’ll perspire.

The last thing they’re worried about is ruining their physical appearance. It’s what makes them so substantial and meaningful!

21. You’ve got a sense of humor

Whether it’s sarcasm or one-liners, you always manage to make guys laugh. There’s never a boring moment when hanging out with you.

If you’re wondering what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, he’s complimenting your sense of humor! Compared to girls who try too hard to act proper, cute girls just don’t care! It’s also why they’re the life of the party most times. [Read: How to be funny around guys and make them crave your company]

22. You’re highly ambitious

The best thing about cute girls? They can balance living in the moment and going after their goals – at the same time. This is why cute girls are so unique and admirable.

When a guy calls you cute, he’s also complimenting your sense of ambition! [Read: How to be successful in life]

23. You don’t mind drinking with the boys

Believe it or not, some girls are very picky with who they drink with! As a cute girl, you aren’t like that at all.

Even if it’s drinking beer after beer with the guys, you really don’t mind! In fact, you find it really fun and amusing to spend your time drinking with them.

24. You’re enthusiastic and passionate

Cute girls are all about finding the perfect balance. While you’re very chill about things, you can also be highly passionate about the things you love. Whether it’s the people you love or your hobbies, your passion clearly shows.

When wondering what does it mean when a guy calls you cute, he’s complimenting your passion and enthusiasm for the things you love!

25. You’re spontaneous

We all know those girls who are so rigid and stiff that they need to have everything planned. Spontaneous moments? That’s their nightmare. With cute girls, this isn’t a problem!

In fact, spontaneity and adventure are in their nature and they highly enjoy unplanned trips to wherever life leads them. It’s how they get the most experiences out of life.

[Read: How to keep a guy interested: 30 effortlessly easy and sexy ways]

So, what does it mean when a guy calls you cute?

If a guy calls you cute, take it as a compliment rather than being offended by it! It might be a rare compliment, but that’s what makes this so meaningful. When a guy calls you cute, he’s admiring the whole package of what makes you who you really are.

[Read: 26 very obvious signs a guy is irresistibly attracted to you sexually even if he calls you cute]

If some guy recently called you cute, and you think that is just a hot downgrade, think again. Being cute isn’t like being called gorgeous where the focus is on how you look. Rather, being cute is being complimented for everything you are!

The post What Does It Mean When a Guy Calls You Cute? These 25 Things! is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Post-COVID Nightlife Observations

Nightlife has opened up many places again, now that COVID restrictions have lifted. How has women’s nightlife behavior changed – and how’s it remained the same?

Contents

I. How Has the Pandemic Affected Nightlife?

1. Low Social Momentum and Awkwardness

2. Dance Floor Frenzy

3. She Just Broke Up with Her Boyfriend

4. COVID Boyfriends

5. Alcoholism and Low Party Stamina

6. The Party Starts Earlier

II. Conclusion: Should I Bother?

Hey guys!

Today’s post is sociological. I’ll share my latest nightlife observations post-COVID-reopening. As I write this in August 2021, many have been desocialized from measures adopted due to the great COVID-19 pandemic.

If you live somewhere where things are not reopening yet, this post will still be useful since it can give you some idea of what to expect when reopening happens.

What are Daddy Issues? 19 Signs to Recognize a Girl with This Issue

What are daddy issues? You hear this term constantly without knowing the signs of daddy issues. There’s more than meets the eye on what this really means.

What are daddy issues? As the name suggests, it’s derived from a girl who has complicated issues with her father. Unlike the popular notion, one of the signs of daddy issues don’t automatically refer to having an absent father, but it can also mean having a bad one.

A parent’s role in a child’s life is very significant so if you had an absent or bad parent, this can affect all your relationships growing up. Of course, this doesn’t go for everyone who’s had father issues.

What are daddy issues? They are issues or difficulties that a woman has, while developing and withstanding romantic relationships in her adult life, based on the poor relationship she had with her father.

[Read: How certain father-taught dynamics can lead to daddy issues]

What are daddy issues?

Daddy issues seriously vary from person to person, and there is no “one way” to have them. It is also not a decision to have these issues, and many women don’t even realize that they exist within them.

We shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that we have daddy issues just because we’re misfortunate enough to have complicated relationships with our father. Some manage to heal from those complications and live a normal life without projecting their issues in all their relationships.

Of course, some aren’t as lucky and have to live with the trauma of having an absent or bad father. It is important to remember that these daddy issues are incredibly deep within their subconscious and cannot truly be uncovered unless by a certified psychologist, or the like.

It’s also possible that just because the signs are similar to those who have daddy issues, it can have nothing to do with their upbringing. These symptoms might just be part of an individual’s makeup and have nothing to do with their relationship with their father. [Read: The father daughter relationship and the 10 issues it can lead to]

Why do some women have daddy issues?

Again, it’s not exactly easy growing up without a father or with an emotionally neglecting father. A parent is supposed to raise and support you as you grow up. When you grow up without a father to look up to or with a bad father, it changes the way you view relationships entirely.

Even if it’s not intentional, you end up going for boys who have similar issues as your father, or you project your fear into all your relationships. For instance, if your father wasn’t emotionally present in your life, having daddy issues would mean you’re unable to commit to any relationship without the fear of being abandoned.

You can’t help it – that’s the one mindset you can’t control if you have daddy issues. Another interesting thing to note is that daddy issues are not just reserved for women with absent fathers.

Many women whose father was very much present in their lives also suffer from daddy issues – specifically bad fathers. [Read: The 13 effects of a good or bad father on a girl]

19 signs you’re a girl with daddy issues

Now that we have a better understanding of what daddy issues are, we can begin to determine the possibility of you, or a girl you know, having them or not.

1. You have issues implementing boundaries

In determining what are daddy issues, these women have difficulty standing firm to their boundaries.

Maybe you’re a pushover and you allow people to walk all over you, or you’ll do everything to please everyone.

People may push things on you that you are definitely not okay with, but you allow it to happen because you’ve never been taught to say no. You feel like saying no is a crime, so you end up never doing it to begin with. No matter who it is, you just can’t stick to your boundaries. [Read: The crucial steps you need to take in your life to make boundaries]

2. You have low self-esteem

Whether your father was in the picture or not, he didn’t give you the love and respect you deserved.

In your relationships and even friendships, you feel like you’re always chasing after the love you want. You’re not capable of saying what you want and going for what you deserve, which can lead to some toxic situations.

3. You cannot trust your partners

One of the determining factors on what are daddy issues is the lack of trust for anyone they are with. When a woman has daddy issues, she generally has the worst time trusting and relying on people.

The woman’s father never gave her a reason to trust him, so she learned at a young age that she cannot trust the men in her life.

With daddy issues, you either have abandonment issues, commitment issues, trust issues, or all of these combined. [Read: Understanding the fear you feel in trusting someone]

4. You tend to date older men

Women with daddy issues tend to date those older than them. They didn’t have a father figure to look up to growing up, so they subconsciously choose men who appear as a father figure for them.

Okay, this is kind of gross to think of your partner as your father figure, but subconsciously this could be happening. We’re not just talking about a small age gap of a few or five years, but even more than that!

5. You’re emotionally unavailable

Surprise, surprise. The lack of emotional intimacy for those with daddy issues shouldn’t even shock you by now.  One of the signs of daddy issues is the inability to become emotionally connected or intimate with anyone.

There’s always going to be a wall between you and them as you fear other men will always treat you the same way your father did – either abandoned or neglected. Your father hurt you, and now you’re afraid to love somebody else. It makes perfect sense, honestly. [Read: Am I emotionally unavailable? 17 signs you are and how to fix it ASAP]

6. You prefer sexual relationships to emotional ones

You gotta admit, sex-based relationships don’t have the messy feelings and complications of an actual relationship. This is all the more true for those with daddy issues.

They might even have more sexual needs than a typical person as they think they can hook and keep a man just through sex alone.

7. You’re afraid of abandonment

Being abandoned by your father doesn’t entirely mean they were never present. It could also mean having a mentally or emotionally neglecting father who never gave you what you needed. Your father abandoned you, and now you constantly fear it will happen again.

Every time your partner leaves, the little voice in the back of your head says “he’s not coming back,” even if he has never given you any reason to believe this. Even if it’s as simple as not saying “I love you” back, you fear they no longer love you and are going to walk away eventually. [Read: The insecure girlfriend – 30 signs and ways to help her feel good]

8. You constantly need reassurance

You find yourself asking for reassurance from your partner often. We can’t stress this enough, but no matter how many times they remind you they love you, it’s never enough for you.

Reassurance is a must for you to feel at peace with yourself and your relationships. You constantly second-guess their intentions when they don’t reassure you. [Read: 20 ways your overanalyzing is sabotaging your relationship]

9. You tend to be jealous

Jealousy is something that many women are guilty of, but especially for those with daddy issues. If you see your partner talking to other women, you tend to get worried, even if they are just friends. You always assume the worst, just because you’ve been dealt the worst cards with your father.

When you’re asking what are daddy issues, everything you do in relationships stems from a bad parental figure, such as being obsessively jealous. That little voice in the back of your head tells you that you aren’t good enough and causes more issues.

10. You seek emotionally unavailable men

Since you’re so used to neglect and abandonment from your father, you subconsciously seek the same thing from other men. You grew up with this unhealthy behavior from the one man you thought you could trust so you wind up looking for that same familiarity in the men you date.

If your father never gave you the time of day, this is what you became comfortable with, so you may seek this out in your partners.

11. You push men away

In line with your abandonment and trust issues, you end up pushing men away. Even if they show their purest intentions, you always believe they’ll break your heart and abandon you. Instead of taking that risk, you push them away before giving them a chance to prove their intentions. [Read: How to stop pushing people away – Why you do this and how to fix it]

12. You become easily attached

Instead of pushing men away, you could do the opposite too: become easily attached. Honestly, this isn’t better than pushing them away as instead of being distant, you become extremely clingy to a fault.

When you find someone that you are really interested in, it can be hard to let them go and move on. Especially if they don’t feel the same way, or if it just doesn’t work out to plan.

13. You seek out fairytales

If you’re asking what are daddy issues, one of the signs is idealizing relationships far too much. You put your partner on a pedestal and you have this perfect vision of your relationship or your partner.

When reality hits, it will slap you hard with disappointment and heartbreak. Again, all this comes back to what you weren’t given as a child. [Read: 20 practical things to consider before giving up on love]

14. You’re a people-pleaser

Your father was never pleased with you, no matter what you did. This is also why you don’t set boundaries and can’t say no, even if your life depends on it. You generally like the idea of pleasing everyone, especially the men in your life, so you often go out of your way to achieve this.

On the contrary, when someone shows their disapproval or frustration, this also sets you off. [Read: 20 signs you’re a people pleaser but you just don’t realize it]

15. You love attention from men, even if they aren’t your partner

You’re fond of the idea that men give you the attention you deeply crave from your partner. Even if it’s not necessarily from your partner, you’re okay with it. Even if you’re in a relationship, you always hope somebody will check you out at the gym or hit on you at the bar.

This sounds dysfunctional and insane, but it’s a quality that someone with daddy issues possesses. [Read: 15 must-know facts about dating a girl with daddy issues]

16. You almost get destroyed with every breakup

Even with your distant and unaffected nature, you can’t help but feel almost destroyed with every breakup. This is one of the signs of daddy issues to look out for. Even if you’ve practically pushed men away and expected the worst, breakups always feel like history is repeating itself.

You’re used to seeking validation and reassurance from your partner and just like that, they’re gone and you can’t breathe.

17. You can’t stand being single

It’s ironic, but one of the obvious signs of daddy issues you’ll see is if you can’t stand being single. Even if you tried, you always get into the same pattern. In fact, it doesn’t matter what type of relationship it is, as long as you’re with someone.

The feelings of loneliness and abandonment get too intense when you’re single that you always end up distracting yourself through relationships. [Read: Relationship addiction – Are you a serial dater who loves love?]

18. You almost always end up with men who don’t deserve you

You’re so used to being neglected and abandoned as a child that you don’t know a single thing about being with a good guy. Unfortunately, it’s a determining sign of daddy issues – you don’t know how to accept love.

You always assume that love has to be toxic, draining, abusive, manipulative, or always has to end in abandonment and neglect. Most likely, you never experienced being with a good man if you have daddy issues. [Read: We accept the love we deserve – why aren’t you worthy?]

19.  You have a complicated relationship with your mother

If you have daddy issues, you most likely have a complicated relationship with your mother. You try your best to get what you need from her that your father should’ve given you, but you always end up constantly clashing. You’re most likely always butting heads or you just gave up on the idea of a relationship with her entirely.

So, what are daddy issues?

Women with daddy issues are those who subconsciously project their neglecting or absent father into their relationships. Even if this is the case, this doesn’t make women who have daddy issues inferior or worth being judged.

It’s not easy growing up without a father or having a complicated father. In fact, it’s one of the most hurtful things you can experience and not everyone gets to heal from it.

[Read: How to get through the ice of an emotionally unavailable woman]

Now that we answered what are daddy issues, we hope you can better understand the issue. If ever you were to date someone with these issues, at least you have better awareness behind their behavior and insecurities.

The post What are Daddy Issues? 19 Signs to Recognize a Girl with This Issue is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Stop Being Shy: 20 Ways to Kick Your Shyness to the Curb

It’s not the easiest thing to be shy as it can make you extremely awkward and reserved to be around. However, you can always learn how to stop being shy.

There’s really nothing wrong with being shy, but it can hold you back from forming friendships and relationships. This is why learning how to stop being shy is so important. Otherwise, this could limit you to the number of potential connections you have.

When you’re shy, it’s normally because of your upbringing, your confidence, or maybe you’ve always just been an introvert and it’s part of your nature.

There may be cases where your shyness is stopping you from trying things you want to do or gives the illusion that you’re really awkward and nervous as a person. Despite all of this, you can always choose to learn how to stop being shy.

[Read: How to be less shy and more comfortable when you meet new people]

Shyness vs introversion: What’s the difference?

It’s really easy to mistake shyness from being an introvert as the same thing, but they’re not. When you’re shy, you’re really not comfortable talking to people or socializing. Even if this is also the case for introverts, their reserved nature comes from their lack of interest in talking to others, and their need for solitude.

This is why some introverts might appear shy from the perspective of strangers, but to everyone else in their life, they can be such great conversationalists. However, when you’re shy and not an introvert, this affects all your interactions.

Introverts are okay when people approach them as some are confident and secure enough to converse. When you’re shy, this isn’t the case. [Read: Nervous sweating – How to recognize your triggers and prevent stress sweats]

Why is learning how to stop being shy important?

By learning to overcome this, you expose yourself to meeting all kinds of people with different personalities and from different backgrounds. Also, you no longer have to wait to be approached when you’re shy, especially when you know how to initiate conversations.

Being shy isn’t a great feeling as you never know when you can make a potential friend or even go on a date, because you’re just too shy to put yourself out there. Of course, it’s easier said than done, but this is why it’s important to stop being shy.

It doesn’t just affect your relationship, but also your confidence and self-worth. As a shy person, it can be challenging for you to go on interviews, present in meetings, or basically go out of your comfort zone. If you don’t overcome this, it can negatively impact your life as a whole. [Read: How to flirt when you’re shy without trying to be too smooth]

How to stop being shy – All the tips you need

If you’re reading this feature, it’s because you’re tired of being looked at as the shy one. It might sound scary to overcome this, but it’s really not as overwhelming as it seems.

The thing about this struggle is you’re not alone – there are a lot of shy people in the world! Just read these tips, and you’ll stop being a wallflower in no time. [Read: Socially awkward? 16 ways to loosen up and live life]

1. Just admit it

The first step to overcoming any struggle is to admit it first. If you really want to learn how to stop being shy, just come clean with it. Acknowledge that you’re shy and that you want to overcome it. It doesn’t make you inferior or a bad person just because you admit your weakness.

In fact, it makes you strong because you’re willing to make yourself better in admitting your flaws. People aren’t going to love you less by coming clean with being shy, we guarantee you that. Most probably, your shyness is one of the quirks they’ve learned to love about you. [Read: Do guys like shy girls and find them more attractive?]

2. Address your shyness with your friends and family

In coming clean, you need to first start with your friends and family. They’re probably the ones who know your shyness better than others, which means they’re also the ones who should be the first to know. If you want to learn how to stop being shy, it starts with your family and friends.

Also, let them know that you don’t want to be pressured. Sometimes, your friends think they’re helping you, but they end up pushing and suffocating you. This way, they’ll know whether to invite you out or not be as pushy in coming with them. [Read: Outgoing introvert? 12 signs you’re a complex ambivert]

3. Figure out why you’re shy

Were you always shy, or did you slowly develop into a shy person? Again, being shy can come from a lot of factors. Maybe you were just influenced to be shy growing up as an only child, or maybe you suffered something traumatic. If you know the core reason for being shy, then you know how to overcome it.

This also helps you determine whether you’re just shy in a specific situation or shy in general. For instance, some shy people are actually very extroverted in small groups but they won’t even speak an entire sentence in a big crowd.

It’s these things that can help you identify the levels of your own shyness and what you can do about it.

4. Know your comfort zone

Know what you’re comfortable with and where your boundaries are. There are some boundaries that you can’t cross, which is fine. In learning how to stop being shy, find the line between what you can’t and can’t cross.

With this being said, there’s also such a thing as making excuses just to stay in your comfort zone forever. Even if overcoming your shyness is a gradual process, you need to be willing to let go of familiarity and comfort at some point. Maybe not right away, but eventually. [Read: How to not be awkward – A guide for the quirky ones]

5. Don’t create huge goals

Goals are great things to have, however, make them modest in the beginning. While the goal is to overcome your shyness, you don’t need to do it overnight. Just like nobody reaches success overnight, you won’t overcome this struggle immediately. What’s the rush?

Just take your time in expanding your comfort zone and getting to know yourself. If your goals are too big, you run the risk of overwhelming yourself and giving up.

You’re going to burn yourself out and as a result, you won’t want to try again in achieving this goal. Take it one step at a time in overcoming your shyness and see where it takes you. [Read: How to feel better about yourself – 20 small steps for the biggest results]

6. Take baby steps

You don’t have to jump right into it. Baby steps, people. We’ve said this over and over above, but we’ll say it again – don’t rush into things. There’s no need to dive into the water right away, but take a dip first and see what happens.

You can’t rush the process as the more you rush things, the more overwhelmed you’ll feel. By taking things slow, you won’t shock yourself and retreat back into your comfort zone. You won’t hide in your comfort zone forever in the fear of being overwhelmed or messing up again all because you dove in too quickly.

7. Prepare some conversation starters

If you’re worried that you won’t have anything to say at the party or interview you’re going to, well then, prepare ahead of time. Come up with five basic conversation starters. This is honestly the best way not to let your anxiety get the best out of you.

When you’re ready for a social event, then you’re ready for whatever life throws at you. As long as you’re saying something related to the event you’re going to, you’re all good.

You can practice doing this with yourself in front of a mirror, and take it up a notch when you’re ready – practice with your friends and family when you have more confidence. [Read: Drawing a blank? Try these 25 perfect conversation starters]

8. Rehearse what you want to say

This is very similar to the point above, but you need to rehearse what you want to say if you want to know how to stop being shy. Part of why we’re shy is because we’re afraid of saying the wrong thing or making a fool of ourselves.

By rehearsing what you’re going to say, you’ll be able to organize your thoughts and also predict where the conversations will go. So, if you don’t like the element of surprise, this is a great way to relieve anxiety.

9. Know what you’re good at

The best way to overcome this and learn how to stop being shy is not to focus on your weaknesses, but your strengths. You’ll never achieve anything when you always focus on what’s lacking, so you need to focus on the things you particularly excel at.

This not only will help you develop confidence, but you also now have some conversation topics at your disposal. Also, don’t be so quick to dismiss this and say you don’t have strengths, because everyone has strengths.

You’re just so used to overlooking them that you don’t see them, but they’re there. [Read: Social anxiety to social butterfly – How to be less awkward]

10. Stop worrying about what other people think

What you need to know is people really don’t care about you. Stop worrying about people judging or criticizing you all the time. Most often than not, people are so focused and preoccupied with their own lives that they don’t have the energy to judge you when they’re busy judging themselves.

It’s easy to think that people are constantly criticizing your every move, but that’s not what the reality is. People love themselves.

Sure, we all comment on each other, but at the end of the day, no one remembers it because we’re too concerned about ourselves. Remember this the next time you’re being overwhelmed by your shyness.

11. Observe extroverts

If you’re not sure how to approach people, watch extroverts. They’re the life of the party and basically embody what it’s like to be confident and secure, and they make it seem so easy to talk to everyone. Watch how they converse, their body language, facial expressions – literally everything.

There’s so much you can learn from extroverts when learning how to stop being shy. You never know, that extrovert friend you have might be the inspiration you need to learn from them. If they can do it, then so can you. [Read: Motivational tips-n-tricks for shy people and introverts]

12. When in doubt, ask questions

If you don’t know what to talk about with someone, remember, people love talking about themselves. The most engaging thing in a conversation is questions, so when in doubt, ask them any question about themselves and they’d keep going.

The best thing about this? It makes it seem like you’re actually interested and engaged in the conversation. It doesn’t even have to be a philosophical one.

Just ask them about their dog or what their tattoo means – that’ll get them going. You can even ask them about their passions in life – people love talking about the things they love. [Read: Why introverts are much more than just shy and awkward]

13. Don’t self-sabotage

Listen, self-deprecation is fine if you’re a comedian and have a high level of self-confidence. However, if you’re shy, do not try to sabotage yourself. If you’re embarrassed or made fun of yourself, realize that it’s not the end of the world.

You can do one of two things – self-sabotage, or use it as an opportunity to keep learning. Stop letting your negative thoughts dictate your progress and direction, no matter how easy it is.

Anyway, you can always choose to laugh about it and it’d make a great way to make your friend laugh. Not bad for someone shy, huh? [Read: Sabotaging your happiness – The many ways you ruin your own life without realizing it]

14. Stay away from bullies

Shocking, yes, but people can be assholes even after they graduated high school. You need to stay away from bullies as best as you can and if you can’t, don’t listen to them. It’s easier said than done, but you can’t let bullies put down your self-esteem even further and diminish your progress completely.

You’re trying to work on yourself, not help them inflate their self-esteem. So, hang around people who are positive, interesting, and supportive. [Read: Easy dating advice for introverts]

15. Work through the fear

If your friend invites you to a house party and it’s your first one, don’t be so hesitant to go. You need to learn to face your fears, even if it feels uncomfortable at first. How else are you going to get better if you don’t face your fears?

More often than not, what you fear happening isn’t going to actually happen.

16. If you don’t succeed, try again

Progress isn’t linear and you need to remember this the next time you feel discouraged. In learning how to stop being shy, keep trying multiple times until you actually get there. The most confident people didn’t get to that stage in just one try, the same goes for you.

You’re not always going to get it right. By learning how to stop being shy, you’re changing a part of yourself, so you’re going to fail a couple of times and it’s going to be hard. [Read: How to overcome shyness – 16 quick-fixes to transform your life]

17. Avoid the label

Sometimes, labeling ourselves as the shy person can hold us back from actually overcoming that struggle. Labels can make you think that you’ll always be defined by them. However, the truth is that you define your life and what you choose to do with it.

Stop putting a label on yourself and start executing action on what you want to do about it. Are you going to be that shy person, or are you going to be someone who actively conquers their fears? The choice is yours.

18. Choose your friends wisely

You are the average of the five people you spend most of your time with. This means that if you’re likely surrounded by negative people, then that perception is going to be reflected in your life as well.

Instead, choose people who empower and support you towards the right path. Choose people who won’t make you dwell on the negativity, but on everything going right. [Read: Good friends are like stars: 18 ways to build lasting friendships]

19. Read a self-help book

Granted that a self-help book doesn’t solve all your problems, but it does help you gain insight on what to do. You can use a self-help book to get professional advice on how to be more confident when you approach people, and learn to overcome your shyness.

It’s not going to magically turn you into an extrovert, but it can improve you *if you let it*.

20. Smile more in conversations

We can’t stress this enough, but you need to smile more in conversations. Even if you feel shy at that moment, a smile can always make conversations seem more light and fun. Generally, you’re also more approachable and friendly when you smile when talking to people.

No, we’re not referring to a creepy smile, but genuinely smile at them and make them feel comfortable. Smiling also gives you the impression of confidence. *so if we were you, we’d smile way more often!*

[Read: A guide on effective communication in a relationship]

So, how to stop being shy?

It’s not the easiest thing to grow up being shy. If anything, it’s one of the hardest things you’re going to overcome. Your comfort zone and courage are going to be tested every step of the way. But you know what? It’s all going to be worth it.

[Read: 25 memorable life lessons to perfect your life in every way you desire]

If you want to get out of your shell, it’s totally doable! You can learn how to stop being shy. Just take it one step at a time and you’ll find yourself overcoming your shyness in no time!

The post How to Stop Being Shy: 20 Ways to Kick Your Shyness to the Curb is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.