19 Wily Signs She Only Wants Your Attention But Not a Relationship

You like her, but you’re not sure if she likes you back. So, how do you know for sure? One way is to look for the signs she only wants attention from you.

It’s time you figured out if this girl is really interested in you or if you’re just wasting time. If she’s only looking for attention, she knows exactly how to get it, but it’s your job to figure out her intentions.

Don’t waste another minute chasing her around if it’s only attention she wants from you. No one wants to be kept around just because it feeds their ego.

Why do girls like attention so much?

We have all known “those” people – the ones who are the attention-hogs and need to have everyone’s eyes on them. But just because we know these people doesn’t mean that we always understand them.

And when that kind of person is a girl that you like, it might be even more confusing. It’s quite difficult for most guys to decode a girl’s behavior. She may seem like she likes you, but then you turn around and she is doing something else that makes you question if she’s even interested in you!

[Read: 14 signs of attention-seeking behavior that reveal just how insecure those girls really are]

If she is only acting that way to get attention from you, what could be the reasons?

Why do some girls want your attention so badly?

It seems rather cruel of her to do that and lead you on, doesn’t it? Let’s take a look at the reasons and signs she only wants attention from you.

First, she may have low self-esteem. Let’s face it – many girls have low self-esteem. It doesn’t matter how hot, intelligent, funny, and charming she is. She still may feel bad about herself for one reason or another.

True, it doesn’t make much sense that a hot girl would have low self-esteem. But unfortunately, that is the case for many of them.

1. Her childhood made her needy

What would make a girl like that have low self-esteem? Well, the list could be endless. But let’s start with her parents and childhood. You have no idea what kind of family she grew up in.

Her parents might not have been very loving to her.

In fact, they could have been downright abusive – whether it’s emotionally, mentally, or even physically. Or she could have just been neglected more than she should have been. [Read: What makes a girl an attention whore who can’t exist without attention]

When that happens to a child, it can have a deep negative impact on that person as an adult. If your parents don’t give you positive messages about yourself, you start to think that you aren’t any good. Unless you hear things like, “You’re so smart, pretty, funny, I’m so proud of you, etc.” then you might think you aren’t ever good enough.

If this happened in her childhood, then she will start seeking approval from anyone and anywhere. She does this because she needs to get emotional confirmation from somewhere, if she never got it from her parents. [Read: 19 signs of low self-esteem in girls that show just how badly they need self-love]

So, that’s one of the reasons why she may be an attention-seeker. She simply feels bad about herself so she looks outside to guys like you to pump up her ego and make her like herself a little more.

2. She just loves attention and needs it to exist

Another reason is that it just feels good to get attention. This ties closely with what was just discussed about her low self-esteem. If someone is feeling bad about themselves, then it feels good to have people pay attention to you.

People who have low self-esteem feel a lot better when other people tell them how great they are. And even if they don’t use those specific words, just the very fact that someone is spending their time focused on them makes them feel important.

Feeling important to other people is a big deal to people with low self-esteem. Because they can’t derive feelings of self-love on their own, they have to rely on other people to do it for them. And the more attention they get, the more they feel important in the world. [Read: Why do some girls desperately crave male attention? Their mind and the need to be desired by all men]

3. She’s toying you for fun

Another reason that she only likes attention is that she might just like playing games with guys. That’s not very ethical, but it happens a lot. Because she doesn’t love herself and needs other people to feel important, when she plays games, it gives her a feeling of power.

Someone with low self-esteem does not feel powerful. They don’t like themselves, so they are in constant angst.

So, if she can find a way to play games with guys and get them to grovel after her, pay lots of attention to her, then she feels like she has power over them.

You could say she does this because she has no morals. That could be true. But one of the biggest reasons she does this is because she is self-centered. [Read: How do some girls become so self-centered and stop caring about others]

When people are self-centered, they are only thinking about themselves. So, if she only wants your attention, she is not thinking about YOUR feelings… only hers.

Think about it this way. If you are starving and there is not enough food, most people would be self-centered and try to get the food all to themselves. It’s just a survival instinct.

Well, it’s really no different when people are starving for attention. They only think about “feeding” their own ego, and don’t think about much else. [Read: 20 clear signs she’s leading you on, using you and only pretending to love you]

The clearest signs she only wants attention from you and nothing more

When you’re into someone, you don’t see reality. Of course, you see them, but their flaws or actions are masked by your puppy dog love eyes. It’s not your fault, really. This happens to the best of us.

In these cases, it’s easy to get caught up in your feelings and end up chasing her. Now, chasing a girl isn’t bad, but if she lets you chase her just for her own ego then it’s a problem.

Not only will your chasing get you nowhere, but it also makes you look like a fool. Don’t be a sucker. [Read: 20 ways to spot selfish people and stop them from hurting you]

1. You can’t actually get a date with her

You may chase her all day and night, but the thing is, you can’t actually land a date with her. But, if she only wants attention from you, she won’t actually spend any time with you.

If she agrees to go on a date with you, just when you’re supposed to go, she’ll make an excuse and flake out. Or, she goes but invites other people along.

2. She’s always texting

If she spends time with you, most of her time is with her glued to her phone. She makes plans with her friends for later, goes on Tinder, takes selfies. The point is, though physically next to you, she’s not mentally present.

She’s basically just hanging out with you to pass the time while you stroke her ego at the same time. [Read: 24 secrets signs of narcissism you should never ignore in a person]

3. She flirts with everyone

Now, there’s nothing wrong with flirting with people, that’s basically how we see if we’re attracted to someone. But she flirts constantly with multiple guys, even if they have girlfriends.

These girls don’t mind grinding against other guys, kissing them, giving their number without any intention of actually going further with them. That’s definitely one of the signs that she only wants attention.

4. She’s all about drama

If there’s something slightly troubling, it’s the end of the world for her.

If she fought with a friend or had issues at school, everyone hears about it. This, first of all, keeps the world revolving around her. Secondly, it keeps you interested in her and concerned. [Read: How to calmly deal with the drama queen]

5. She’ll speak to you on social media

But not via text message. Maybe you have her number. It doesn’t matter, she never replies. If she only replies to you via Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook or Twitter, there’s a problem.

It’s easy to ghost people on social media in comparison to texting and phone calls. Plus, it keeps you hooked on watching what she posts. [Read: What does it mean when someone’s ignoring your texts on purpose?]

6. She needs to feel like a celebrity

You noticed she’s unable to sustain genuine relationships with people around her. She constantly needs to be in the center of attention with constant stimulation around them. It’s hard to get that from the same people. She switches them in and out of her life.

7. Her friends are the same

There’s this quote that says, “You are who you hang out with.” And you know, it’s completely true. If all her friends do these things and use people, there’s a high chance that she does too.

Now, we don’t want to generalize, so you definitely should check her friends before you make this assumption. [Read: Sneaky signs you’re pursuing a genuine 24K gold digger]

8. Her excuses are vague

You asked her out or asked her if she’s into you, but she can’t really seem to give you a solid answer. In fact, she doesn’t have a good or logical answer to any question you ask her.

Truthfully, this is one of those big signs she only wants attention from you, but doesn’t actually care nor does she even want to invest the time.

What does this mean? She just keeps you around because it makes her feel good to watch you run after her.

9. She doesn’t want to be alone with you

She never asks you to hang out one on one. Well, she never asks you to hang out but never mind that. If she’s not trying to spend time with you one-on-one, it’s not a good sign.

If she saw you as a friend or someone close, she wouldn’t have a problem spending alone time with you, but she doesn’t even see you as that. [Read: Attention seeker: 17 signs a girl is one even if you can’t see it]

10. She keeps you away from her friends

You don’t get invited out with her and her friends which is a pretty solid sign she’s not into you. If she was, she would tell all her friends and introduce you to them as soon as possible.

But in this case, she doesn’t want them to know that you’re anything more than a friend, she doesn’t want them to get the wrong idea of what’s going on between you two.

11. She’s inconsistent

One week she texts you all the time. Then, the week after, she’s as cold as ice.

Though extremely annoying, it hooks you on her as you end up investing more time in figuring out what’s going on. See how it works? It’s a one-sided relationship through manipulation tactics. [Read: 15 types of girlfriends who will make your life hell]

12. She knows nothing about you

She’s never actually asked you about yourself. Weird, right?

If someone really likes you, they want to know everything about you. But if she’s not curious about your personal life then she’s not into you at all. If a girl likes a guy, she spends all the time in the world getting as much information on them as possible.

13. She loves being complimented

In fact, she spends a lot of time fishing for compliments! If she does her makeup, wears something sexy, she’s expecting your jaw to hit the floor.

She even makes negative comments about her appearance, usually, that’s a way to get you to praise her and boost her ego. This is one of the clear signs that she only wants attention from you. [Read: Manipulative behavior – Why it’s toxic and why you shouldn’t put up with it]

14. She has 1,000,000,000,000 selfies on her social media

Selfies are pretty common these days. However, there’s taking selfies… and then there’s TAKING SELFIES!!!! In other words, when a girl does nothing but take pictures of herself and post them for the whole world to see, then you know she is an attention-hog.

And even more so, if she only uses a ton of filters and never shows her natural face, then you know she needs to “look perfect,” and is searching for people to compliment her all the time. [Read: What make someone an attention seeker and how to read those traits]

15. Her words don’t match her actions

You may be saying how much you like her, and she says she likes you too. But yet when you text her, she takes hours and hours to respond. People who really like you don’t take that long.

Or when you ask her to hang out, and she says “Oh yes, I can’t wait to see you!” but she can never fit you into her schedule or she flakes on you.

If that’s happening, then she is probably only seeking your attention. [Read: Here’s why you should always ditch the people who flake on you]

16. She posts on social media 24/7

If she posts things on social media several times an hour, then as they say, “Houston, we have a problem!”

It could be anything from what she’s eating, to her friends, to selfies… well, anything! It’s not only important to analyze how often she posts, but also what kind of stories and photos she posts. The more often and the more self-centered the posts, the more likely she is only trying to get attention from people.

[Read: Why did she suddenly lose interest and what you need to learn from it]

Now that you know the signs she only wants attention from you, it’s time you figured out if this girl is someone you need in your life or if you’re just wasting your time feeding her ego. If it’s the latter, it’s time to move on!

The post 19 Wily Signs She Only Wants Your Attention But Not a Relationship is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How To Show a Guy You Like Him & Charm Him While Being a Real Tease

You know this guy, and you think he’s dreamy. You think about him all the time, but you don’t know how he feels. Here is how to show a guy you like him.

So, you found a guy who piques your interest. He’s hot, sexy, and totally your type. You sense he’s interested in you, too. But once you make a move, he shuts down. What went wrong? It leaves you wondering how to show the guy you like him and get him to reciprocate your feelings.

Well, for one, boys love the challenge. Once things get too easy, they tend to lose interest. According to Matthew, a proud player of the game, “I don’t like it when girls are too easy. I enjoy the chase, as it makes it so much more worthwhile.”

The thing is, it is not just the players who love the chase, but also guys who are actively seeking a woman to be in a serious relationship with. According to Brian, “I initially didn’t think anything was going to happen between me and my current girlfriend—that is, until she turned on the charm, played the game, and teased me into submission. I couldn’t resist her.”

[Read: The secret art of attracting guys in a way they just can’t resist]

Why it’s difficult to know if a guy likes you back

We all wish “the chase” in romance would be a little easier, right? It would be a lot better if we knew directly that the person of our desire actually liked us back. But humans are funny like that – especially guys. They can be difficult to decode, even when you want to show a guy you like him.

However, the only reason guys are not easy to read is that women often filter men’s behavior through their own expectations. They often look for “signs” that they like them.

For example, if a guy happens to send you a “xoxo” with a smiley face emoji in a text, you might interpret that as him really liking you.

This may or may not be the case. Men are actually quite simple, but women tend to make their behaviors more complex, because that’s the way women think. [Read: Does he like me? 23 signs to decode his body language]

How to read a guy’s interest and mixed signals before showing him you like him

Generally speaking, if you are getting mixed signals from a guy, then the answer is “no,” he probably doesn’t like you as much as you like him.

If you are not getting mixed signals *and they are all positive ones* then the answer is “yes” to whether he likes you or not. [Read: Do guys play hard to get? The honest truth, 21 reasons and what you should do]

You see, the bottom line is this: men and women think differently. For example, let’s say a guy and a girl go out on a date, and they both had a great time. What happens next will be very different in the minds of both the man and the woman.

The man might think, “Hey, that was a great date yesterday. Now, what am I going to eat for lunch?” He probably actually did have a wonderful time, but he’s not obsessing over it. [Read: 30 facts about guys that can help you easily read his mind]

On the other hand, the woman is probably reliving every little detail of the night before. She’s on pins and needles waiting to see if and when he will contact her again. She calls all her friends and analyzes everything inside and out.

Men don’t do that.

That’s one of the reasons it’s sometimes difficult to know if a guy likes you. And if that’s the case, that leads you to wonder how to show the guy that you like him, because not all guys are obvious about their attraction for you. [Read: 50 texts to make him miss you, think about you and want you closer]

Pros and cons of showing a guy that you like him

You might be thinking that only positive things can come from you telling this guy that you like him. Well, that could be true. However, you need to think about what could go wrong, too.

Let’s start with the pros of showing a guy you like him

Well, the obvious pro would be that he likes you back, asks you out on a date, you get into a relationship, and then you both live happily ever after. But that may not be the journey it takes if you tell him you like him. It might happen that way, but it might not. [Read: Dammit why doesn’t he like me back? 31 reasons why guys do this]

Another pro is that you at least get it off your chest. Once you do, then you can stop wondering about how he feels, because then you will know. And even if he doesn’t feel the same way, at least you can move on and stop obsessing about him.

The last pro of knowing how to show a guy you like him is that it can break the sexual tension. Yes, sexual tension can be fun. However, sometimes it can be torturous too. If he likes you back, at least you can both act on your feelings and see how you can move forward. [Read: 20 strong signs of sexual tension to know you make each other horny]

Now on to the cons of showing a guy you like him

Here’s the most obvious… you tell him that you like him and he doesn’t feel the same way. What then?

Obviously, it will be a blow to your ego. No one likes rejection, and most people don’t take it very well.

Are you prepared to face the fact that he might not like you the way you like him? If you are, then great. Go ahead and tell him. But if you’re not ready for rejection, and you think it will ruin your very existence, then maybe you should think twice about telling him. [Read: How to know for sure if a guy likes you + 35 ways to make him like you more]

And then if he doesn’t feel the same way, how will it change your relationship?

That depends on what kind of dynamic you had in the first place. If you are good friends with him, then it could be very awkward from that point on. You don’t want to ruin a friendship, do you?

But on the other hand, if he does like you and is too shy to tell you, then maybe it will work out.

If the guy is someone you just met or don’t know very well, then the riskiness of telling him you like him is much lower. You have a lot less to lose, because you don’t really have him in your life anyway.

Sure, it will still be a blow to your ego, but the pain won’t last very long. [Read: 20 signs he’s pretending not to like you but really does]

As you can see, you really should sit down with yourself and have a serious talk about whether or not telling the guy you like him will ultimately have more pros or more cons.

Only you can answer that question, but it’s important to be mentally prepared for any outcome.

Charm and tease: How to show a guy you like him while being a tease

The goal is to make him go gaga for you. You want to tease him to the point where he can’t stop thinking about you.

There are many ways to do this; all it takes is a little self-control on your part, some practice, and voila—you’ll definitely snag the man you’ve had your eye on.

Although these tips don’t apply to all guys, they certainly apply to most of them. Here are the best ways to show a guy you like him and still be a tease.

1. Use your words

Sitting pretty and looking like a princess isn’t enough. You need to amp up the flirting if you want to get it through his thick skull that you’re interested.

Don’t stray too far from the familiar and stick to the basics, such as, “Wow, your new haircut looks great!” or “Looks like that Crossfit gym membership is paying off, you sexy beast.” [Read: 30 special kinds of compliments for guys they’ll never forget]

2. Utilize eye contact

Gazing at him seductively will be sure to let him know that you like him, while still maintaining tease status.

There’s just something about looking at a man straight in the eye, then averting your gaze that’ll have him worked up into a frenzy. Do this a couple of times… until he gets the hint. [Read: What does eye contact mean to a guy – Is he a subtle flirt?]

3. Lightly touch him

The next time you’re having a conversation with him, inject some physical contact into the mix. Everything from lightly stroking his hand to gently hitting his arm while you’re laughing at his jokes will signal your interest.

If you’re not afraid of being more forward, playing accidental footsie with him is another option! [Read: How to make a guy horny just by innocently sitting next to him]

4. Show off your assets

Be sure to make an effort for him the next time you’re out. Take the initiative to put on something sexy and look your best.

If you’ve got great legs, don a dress that shows them off. If you’ve got great boobs, wear a V-neck top. No matter what you wear, just be sure not to look too slutty. When he compliments you, say something like, “I’m glad you like what you see.” [Read: How to look cute – 25 ways to exude cuteness and melt any guy’s heart]

5. Laugh at his jokes

Men love feeling special, so the next time he cracks a joke, be sure to laugh. Once he knows that you appreciate his humor, you’ll earn bonus points in his book. This is a good way to show a guy you like him.

6. Make him feel special

Hang on to his every word and make him feel like he’s the only one in the room. Be sure to compliment him and boost his ego. He will appreciate the effort you’re making on his behalf. Once you successfully make a man feel special, you’re in the clear.

7. Act interested

Men love it when you show interest in them. From asking him about his accomplishments, to letting him know that you’re keen on picking up his hobbies, he will be smitten by the time you’re done asking him everything you need to know about his likes and dislikes.

Remember not to interrogate him but, rather, pose the questions in a fun and interesting manner. [Read: 33 sexy ways to subtly seduce a guy who’s not yet yours and hook him hard]

8. Use technology

The beautiful thing about technology is that you can keep him aware of your presence, even when you’re apart.

If used right, everything from texting to social media will work to your benefit. For example, poking him and liking his posts on social media is a simple way to get his attention. Even posting great-looking photos and stories on Instagram would be more than enough to make him desire you way more!

As for texting, just shoot him something simple like, “Had a great time last night and can’t wait to do it again.” [Read: The sexy thirst trap – How to master sexy photos without looking trashy]

9. Don’t flirt with others

No one likes competition. Some people may say that, by making a man jealous, he’ll show more interest in you, but that’s certainly not the case—especially if he has other options to choose from.

Play it safe, and don’t flirt with anyone else the next time you’re with him. However, be sure not to overdo it by coming off as desperate.

10. Tease him

Inject some humor into your next conversation by teasing him.

However, remember that boys are sensitive creatures and there’s no turning back once you bruise his ego. Indulge in playful teasing, but don’t be cruel. [Read: How to tease a guy subtly and make him realize he likes you]

11. Let him know you’re available

Let him know you’re interested in spending time with him without being too forward. If he’s interested, he’ll pick up on the hints you drop.

For example, you can say, “I love the lineup at the music festival happening this weekend, but no one I know is keen on heading there with me.” If he likes you, he’ll ask you out. [Read: 15 sneaky and very fun ways to get a guy to ask you out]

12. Be confident

Another way to show a guy that you like him and still be a tease is by exuding confidence. Men love confident women, as it amps up your sex appeal. It’ll make him want you more.

Would you rather date a confident man or a mousy one? The same goes for women.

13. Show interest in what he likes

Generally, people enjoy spending time with others who enjoy doing the same things as them. That’s why yogis group together, hikers spend time together, and drinkers head out binge drinking together.

When getting to know him, suggest that you would like to try some of the things he enjoys doing. For example, if he loves rock climbing, hint that you have always wanted to give it a go. Ask him questions about the sport and, before you know it, he’ll invite you out to show you the ropes.

14. Get physical

Once you’ve scored a date with him, get physical—but don’t go all the way. You want him to know that you’re interested, while keeping some form of mystery and yearning in play.

Some guys may call this blue-balling, but hey, you want him coming back for more.

Contrary to what this feature may suggest, boys are not complex creatures. There’s no reading between the lines when it comes to them. If you like him, you’re simply going to have to prove it to him.

[Read: 30 subtle, obvious and very sexual flirting tips that’ll work every single time]

Whether it’s by showing interest in what he likes or showing off your assets, knowing how to show a guy that you like him isn’t that difficult. The rule of thumb is to never give it all away at one go. Lead him on, and you’ll hook him when the time is right.

The post How To Show a Guy You Like Him & Charm Him While Being a Real Tease is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

17 Ways to Ask a Girl If She Likes You Without Asking Her Directly

You have your eye on someone who you think is really special. You don’t know how she feels, but you want to. Here’s how to ask a girl if she likes you.

Regardless of how many girls you’ve gone out with, there’s still no telling what’s on any one girl’s mind *yes, they’re that complicated*. It’s hard to figure out for sure if the girl you have feelings for is also interested in you. Sometimes you need to take matters into your own hands, so here is how to ask a girl if she likes you, without saying the words directly!

For some men, the way to find this out can be an uphill battle, and they can make embarrassing and irreversible mistakes they end up regretting. Therefore, actually knowing what the right approaches are helps you get the answer—and it might even be the answer your hope for.

[Read: How to tell if a girl likes you by the way she texts you – 28 very subtle signs you can’t miss]

Reflect on why you want to ask the girl if she likes you

Before you do anything, the first step is to do some reflection on why you want this girl to like you. Okay, this might seem like a dumb thing to do. Why would you have to think about why you want to know if a girl likes you? Well, it’s actually an important step, and here’s why. [Read: What makes a man attractive? 38 traits that make a woman desire you]

Are you just looking for the thrill of the chase, or do you really like HER?

Sometimes, guys only like the girl until they catch her, and then they get disinterested. This is not fair to her. Because if it turns out that she really likes you, and then you change your mind, it will break her heart.

So, you really need to figure out how much you like her before you do anything. If you are wanting to know if she likes you because it inflates your ego, then that is not a good reason to do it. If you want her to like you because you’d really like to have sex with her one time, it’s silly to make her fall in love with you just for that! [Read: How to get a girl to have casual sex with you by arousing her very subtly]

However, if you really, truly like her, then you have the green light to go ahead.

You also have to think about what you want to come out of this. If you’re not ready for a serious relationship, but she is, that could create problems. Or vice versa.

You need to sort out your exact feelings and intentions for the girl before you try to figure out how she feels. Yes, it’s great knowing that someone likes you, but it’s not just about you. Her feelings are involved too.

On the other hand, if you truly like her, you need to be mentally and emotionally prepared for the fact that she may not feel the same way. That can be a blow to your ego. But if that happens, it’s not the end of the world. It just means she’s not the girl for you!

Bottom line is that you need to do some thinking and reflect on what your intentions are before you take any action. Because her feelings – and your feelings – are going to be on the line. [Read: How to make a girl want you, desire you and think of you sexually]

How to ask a girl if she likes you *without really asking*

After you’ve done some thinking, then you can take some action. And sometimes you just need to jump in and find out if the girl you are crushing on actually likes you. Don’t be shy! Follow these steps, and you should be able to see the signs she likes you in no time.

1. Try to strike up a convo

Find an excuse to talk to her, whether it’s about the weather or your next project. The best time to do this is when she’s really busy or preoccupied with something.

If she stops what she’s doing just to talk to you, tell her, “Oh, you seem busy. I’ll come back later.”

If she tells you she’s not busy and you guys talk, that’s a great sign. A girl definitely likes you if she’s willing to stop whatever it is she’s doing to give you her full, undivided attention. [Read: How to keep a conversation going with a girl you really like]

2. Remember eye contact

There’s absolute truth to the cliché: The eyes are the windows to the soul. The eyes tell a lot about the thoughts and feelings of a person, as well as if they’re lying or not.

So remember when you talk to her, give her eye contact. If you’ve caught her staring at you a lot, stare back and smile. If she frowns and looks away like she’s irritated or confused, then tough luck. However, if she gets shy or awkwardly looks away, then you have reason to get your hopes up. [Read: 13 subtle eye contact moves to catch a girl’s eyes from afar]

3. Check her body

You can tell a lot about a girl by the way she moves. Despite what she may say sometimes *like she doesn’t really like you, for example*, her body language may tell a different story.

If she turns to you when you’re in the room or when you speak even if she’s doing something else and you’re not even talking to her, that’s a dead giveaway.

And if you do speak to her, does she self-consciously touch her hair or straighten her dress? [Read: 15 body language cues a girl gives away if she likes you]

4. Tell your friends about her

And let her know all about it. For example, tell her how you’ve been telling your work colleagues how you think her not playing a popular new game is just weird but cool since everyone’s in on it these days.

This opens up an opportunity for you to see if she’ll retort about a story of her own. This allows you to see if she told her friends about you too.

5. Make it about you

If she tells you about her bad dates from the past, tell her something like, “That won’t happen if you’re going out with me” and just laugh about it.

And then wait to see how she reacts.

The secret to this tip is to associate whatever she tells you with how you would handle the situation. This is a great gauge of how she reacts after you give her a mental image of you and her together. [Read: 13 naughty ways to get out of the friend zone in no time]

6. Ask about what she likes in a guy

A tried and tested way to also ask a girl if she likes you without really asking her is to ask her what she likes in a guy. A rather forward girl would go as far as exactly describing you.

There might be others who would tell you what they like in a guy and you can go ahead to be that guy for her. The way she’ll answer this question is your cue that she likes you and would be interested if you make a move. [Read: What girls find attractive – 25 traits that make a guy irresistible to women]

7. Play favorites

There’s also a game to try to know if she likes you without explicitly asking her. Over lunch or while the two of you are together, like sharing a cab or something, try to pass the time with the good ol’ favorites game.

Ask her what her favorites are, and if she’s eager to tell you more about herself while asking you back about your own favorites, then that means she’s also interested in knowing more about you. [Read: Instant chemistry – 25 flirty questions to ask a girl you like]

8. Drop some hint

Go ahead and subtly show her you like her. Compliment her on her new haircut, buy her favorite blend of coffee “just ‘cause” or simply tell her you like how she handled her presentation.

These little hints that you drop here and there are like bread crumbs. If she reciprocates or shows eager appreciation, then you’ll know she’s digging what you’re doing—and maybe even be digging you too.

9. Go on, jokester

There’s always something about funny guys that makes girls go gaga. So if your looks aren’t entirely on point for her, then you might change her mind with your sense of humor.

So go on, put it out there and make her laugh. By jokingly telling her how she dressed up all for you because she likes you, you can at least have an idea if she thinks you’re friend material or more.

If she vehemently denies it or is blushing, then there’s a chance she likes you. If she starts to rattle off sarcastic remarks, that’s an entirely different story. [Read: How to flirt with girls – 25 tips that’ll make any girl enjoy your company]

10. Get the group in on it

If you have common friends, then that makes it so much easier to know if she likes you. Plan a group outing or watch a movie together.

If a group hangout is something she agrees to, then she might be interested in getting to know you better.

It also paves the way for you to know each other better. And, if the time is right, you can even have your friends ask your dream girl out for you. [Read: How to ask a girl to hang out casually without making it a big deal]

11. See if she blushes or gets awkward

Find out any answer to any question you ask a girl even if they don’t even open their mouths. You can just watch how they react to certain statements you or your friends say.

And even without asking, you’ll easily find out if a girl likes you by getting close to her, and if she blushes and becomes shy, then there’s your cue.

12. Try to go physical

Not that kind of physical *unless you want her to think you’re a perv*. For example, while in a line, try to brush her hand with your arm or even dare to wrap your arms around her.

If she doesn’t budge, then take it a step further and get a fry from her food tray. Or, next time you see her, playfully nudge her, and if she nudges you back until you get into a playful physical game, then that’s a good sign.

Who knows, you may even end up embracing each other—or kissing! [Read: When to kiss a girl – 20 subtle signs to predict the magic moment]

13. Ask her out

There’s really not a better way to find out if she really likes you than taking the plunge and just asking her out.

First, wait for the right time, get her in a right place, make sure she’s in the right frame of mind *not busy, angry, or bawling her eyes out over her ex*, and pop the question.

Ask her if she’d like to go to the newly opened museum with you, or grab some steak and fries in your favorite restaurant. If she likes you, or at the very least considers you date material, then chances are she’d say “yes.” [Read: 15 casual ways to ask a girl out on a date and warm her up to a yes]

14. Go big or…

The best way to ask a girl if she likes you is, of course, by going direct with the big question: “Do you like me?”

While this can take a lot of balls *and kudos to you if you can sum up the courage*, this question helps to settle it once and for all. A quick, direct question such as this will more likely get a quick, direct answer—so be prepared! [Read: Should I ask her out? 30 signs she’s waiting for you to make a move]

The sure signs a girl likes you you always need to look for before asking her out

Girls are not always direct. So, trying to ask a girl if she likes you can be frustrating for a lot of guys. They don’t always know how to decode the girl’s signals. Here are the three most important things to look for, before you ask a girl if she likes you.

1. Body language

If she sits close to you, looks into your eyes, or touches your hand, that means she probably likes you.

As humans, we tend to want to be close to people we like. If she doesn’t like you, she will keep her distance, look away from you, and not engage in much conversation with you. [Read: How to start a conversation with a girl and make her really like you]

2. She texts you a lot

Girls like talking – usually more than guys do. So, if she is engaging with you over text or social media, that is a good sign.

It’s great if she reciprocates your communication, but it’s even better if she initiates it. But if she is wanting to talk to you and have conversations, then she probably likes you. [Read: How to tease a girl over text and 15 ways to get her to flirt back]

3. She wants to spend time with you

Someone who is not interested in you won’t be too eager to spend time with you. So, if she’s always willing to hang out and do just about anything with you, she probably likes you. And if she asks you to hang out before you ask her, then you are definitely in the “un-friend zone.”

While these are just a few signs that a girl likes you, they are the most important ones to look out for.

[Read: How to tell if a shy girl likes you – 22 signs and the best ways to open her up]

Use these tips on how to ask a girl if she likes you to make your move, and just remember, while the saying, “You’ll never know unless you ask” may be true, you also have to remember to be prepared for what the answer will be.

The post 17 Ways to Ask a Girl If She Likes You Without Asking Her Directly is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

19 Ways to Pull Back in a Relationship When You’re Giving Too Much

Romance isn’t always easy, and sometimes you don’t get what you need from your partner. So, you might need to learn how to pull back in a relationship.

So, of all the studies that they have done about the success, or lack thereof, of relationships, one proven favorite is the theory of equity. In essence, it is that a relationship is most successful if each partner feels as if they receive their fair share. If you find you give more than receive, you might be wondering how to pull back in a relationship.

There are all sorts of reasons, in addition to the theory of equity, why you would want to take a step back to give you both air to breathe. But, ignoring what your heart tells you by pulling your emotions back is usually easier said than done.

The problem is that if you feel inequity, they probably do too. The last thing you want to do is to either invest way more than you should or overwhelm them to the point where you lose them.

[Read: Putting too much effort into a relationship – Where to draw the line]

Reasons you should pull back in a relationship

It may seem strange to pull back when you are in a relationship and in love with someone, because you should be coming together, right? That’s true. A relationship should be two people who are constantly trying new ways to bond with one another. But that doesn’t always happen.

When that’s the case, it would not only be appropriate, but healthy, to pull back in a relationship. Here are some reasons you should pull back in a relationship. [Read: How to stop fighting in a relationship & 16 steps to really talk]

1. They are not treating you with respect

Every human being on the planet deserves to be treated with respect. And if your partner is calling you bad names, yelling, fighting, gaslighting, or physically abusing you, then you are definitely not being treated with respect!

If this is the case, you should really just end the relationship. But if you’re not ready to do that just yet, you should at least pull back.

You should love yourself enough to say “NO!” to your partner. Stand your ground and demand to be treated with respect. And if that can’t be accomplished by talking it through calmly, then it might be time to pull back. [Read: 16 reasons why you’re always being taken for granted]

2. They are being selfish

Some people are just naturally selfish, but that doesn’t mean you need to put up with their selfishness. Some people are too selfless, and that shouldn’t be you! [Read: How to stop being codependent: 17 steps to finding yourself again]

Ideally, there should be a balance of selfishness and selflessness in BOTH people. You shouldn’t ONLY care about yourself and your needs. But you also shouldn’t ONLY care about your partner and their needs while sacrificing your own. There needs to be a balance.

So, if you find that you are too selfless, and that your partner is too selfish, then it is time to pull back. Teach them a lesson – that you will not put up with it anymore. When it is unbalanced like this, it is time to pull back in a relationship to see if balance can be restored. [Read: 15 signs of a taker in a relationship – Are you a giver or a taker?]

3. They don’t appreciate you

Sadly, most people don’t express appreciation to their partner very often. In fact, some don’t even do it at all. This can be toxic. It is important that both people in a relationship show the other their appreciation on a regular basis.

Think about it – if you do something nice for someone and don’t even get a simple “thank you,” then doesn’t it make you feel resentful? If you cook dinner every night, but never, ever get any appreciation, then you are being used. You should be appreciated even for the “little things” you do all the time.

So, if your partner is taking you for granted and thinks you should just cater to their every need, then it is time to pull back in the relationship. [Read: Healthy relationship boundaries – how to talk about them and set them]

4. They are neglecting you

Many people associate abuse with a negative or toxic relationship. But being neglected by your partner can also be a reason you should sit back and re-think everything your partner is doing to you.

If they are not communicating with you, avoiding you, playing video games 24/7, only hanging out with their friends *and not you*, or not giving you love and affection, then this is considered neglect.

Neglect isn’t as bad as physical abuse necessarily, but it is a form of emotional abuse. Neglecting your partner is withholding the very needs and desires that they have – to be in a loving relationship. And neglect is not part of a loving relationship. [Read: 18 foundations of a relationship that separate the good and the bad]

How to pull back in a relationship and create some distance

If you want to know how to pull back in a relationship, it is all about finding the inner you. After all, a relationship is an addition to YOU, not the definition of you.

So, when in one, always maintain a good sense of self and not get lost in the mix. Distancing yourself, although sounding hard and somewhat foreign, can sometimes be the catalyst not only to save your relationship, but also to save you. [Read: 17 most important things in a relationship that hold it together]

1. Think with your head, not your heart

One of the hardest things to do is to take the emotion out of something. But, if you want to pull back in a relationship, then separate your emotions and think about each situation rationally. Instead of chasing them when they blow you off, blow them off right back.

If you stop reaching out to them with desperation and put things into practical terms, then you make a lot better decisions. Before you take action, ask yourself what you want to happen and how you would handle someone else who treated you the way your partner does.

If there wasn’t so much emotion and history wrapped up, would you behave the same way? Talk through your actions in your head and ask your heart to take a back seat for a while.[Read: The most common relationship problems and quick ways to fix them]

2. Do what you love often

If you want to back off in a relationship, then find the things that you love to do and let them distract you. If you are too wound up in a union, it is easy to make it the center point of your life.

It creates a whole lot of drama that doesn’t need to be. Just for one day, do what you love and don’t give any thought to your significant other.

If you make it through one day, then try for two. You will be amazed at how happy you make yourself when you stop trying to make someone else responsible for your happiness. [Read: How to be emotionally independent and stop relying on others for your happiness]

3. Call your partner in crime

If you want to pull back, then call your partner in crime to take some time off. We all have that one friend who never gets tired of hearing us bitch and also gets us out of bitch mode to have some fun.

The best way to pull back and discover if your relationship is really what you want is to remember what it is like to have fun without the person who makes your life so complex right now. [Read: Partner in crime – 31 signs you have this friend in your life]

4. Stay busy

The best way to stop obsessing about a relationship that isn’t going exactly as you want is to find something else to occupy your time. Move over thoughts and anxiety surrounding your relationship.

If you find yourself making a mountain out of a molehill, worrying too much about where you stand, where you are going, or what is going on, distract yourself by finding something to do to take your mind off of it.

Distraction is the best medicine. Get lost in a book, hit the gym, or just catch dinner with a friend. There is always safety in numbers when you look to find some distance in a relationship.

5. Focus on you by making a goal

If you want to know how to pull back in a relationship and create distance, then find a goal to focus on. Instead of focusing on a relationship that creates anxiety for you, find something else to throw all that wasted energy into.

If you have a goal in mind and are determined to meet it, then whatever goes on in your relationship seems minuscule and a huge waste of time.

Keep your eyes on the prize and let your relationship issues work themselves through instead of trying to control them yourself. [Read: How to focus on yourself and 27 ways to create your own sunshine]

6. Sit back and let them come to you

If you are always the one looking for answers, chasing them, or wanting more, then it is time to take a back seat. Sometimes the hardest thing is drawing a line in the sand and keeping it.

We always find reasons to cross back over and let them take control. But, if you really want to pull back and create distance, then set boundaries for yourself and for them. Let them pursue you for once while you focus on staying strong. [Read: 20 hints to make your partner realize they’re losing you]

7. Set up obstacles to obsession

If you know you have a hard time with self-control, then make sure to set up obstacles that prevent you from putting too much of yourself or your angst into your communication with them.

Blocking them on your cell phone when highly emotional or out drinking is a great way to ensure that you don’t overreact and end up undoing any distance that you put between the two of you when you had your rational mind and head on straight.

There are going to be times when knowing how to pull back in a relationship will be easy, like when you aren’t upset. But, other times when you are lonely or missing them, it will be much tougher, which is why a safety net is an excellent insurance policy. [Read: Why you feel lonely in a relationship and what to do about it]

8. Stay off their social media

Stop stalking their social media. If you want to pull back in your relationship, the first place to start is to disconnect from their social media plug.

9. Have a “safe” friend to guide you

If you know that you have moments of weakness where you will run back, even when trying to pull back, have that one friend who talks some sense into you before you make the mistake of undoing all the progress you achieved.

10. Talk about them with someone you love instead of badgering them to talk to you

If they are unwilling to talk about what is going on, stop trying to insert yourself into their drama and talk it through with someone else that you love and trust. If you need to pull back, you also don’t have to explain why.

A friend is going to be your best ally and your partner your worst enemy when you feel the need to explain your need to pull back. You don’t owe your partner an explanation, and that energy is much better spent talking it over with someone who is on your side. [Read: 16 signs it’s time to move on and end the relationship]

11. Go back to the person you were before you met them

We have a tendency to lose ourselves in relationships that either overwhelm or hurt us or are just too intense. Try to remember the person you were before the relationship.

If finding the strength is difficult, find the inner you before they entered the scene. And, what you will find is that you had a life before. If you choose, you can have a life after, but you need to pull back to get your answers. [Read: How to be independent even when you’re in a relationship]

12. Kind of make it a shit test

A shit test is something that you put someone through to see how much they will do for you.

If you want to know how to pull back in a relationship, and find out how much someone cares for you then, really pulling back, is the only way to make them truly think about how much you mean to them and what they need. [Read: What is a shit test, and how people use them]

13. Figure out if you are better off with them or without them

Convince yourself that pulling back to take some time is the only way that you’ll find if they are the one for you, or if they are the one making you unhappy.

If you don’t take the time now to pull back and find out what is going on, you can easily get swept up. Convince yourself that it is only a break and for a while. Most importantly, convince yourself that it is a necessary thing to do for your own emotional wellbeing. [Read: Relationship break – 17 rules to taking a break and how to plan for it]

14. Stop letting them control your feelings and emotions

If you have a hard time pulling away but know that you should, then it might be the case that your partner controls you with their behavior.

If you know in your heart that something isn’t right and you need to pull back to gain some perspective, don’t let them emotionally blackmail you or use other forms of abuse to keep you in close when it hurts you. [Read: How to know if your relationship is toxic so you can get out fast]

15. Find out what you need to make yourself secure and do it

The only way that someone pulls back is if they have the security and the self-esteem to know that if they pull back and lose the relationship, it wasn’t right from the start.

Find the strength within yourself to know that you can stand on your own two feet if you lose them. After all, if you don’t pull back, then you just might end up in a relationship that isn’t healthy, or on the other end, losing someone you held onto too tightly.

Whether you want to distance yourself in your relationship because you think you are more into it than they are, or just because you generally have a feeling that something isn’t right and they are using you, it is time to take the time to figure things out.

Sometimes we get so deep into our relationships and obsessed with making it work that we can’t see that they aren’t working for us.

[Read: How to know if you should break up – 22 signs that can clearly guide you]

The only way to truly figure out if your current relationship is what you want or what you need, requires taking a step back and distance yourself. Follow these steps for how to pull back in a relationship and help both you and your partner.

The post 19 Ways to Pull Back in a Relationship When You’re Giving Too Much is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Couple Swap: First Timer’s Guide to Having Sex with Another Couple

You and your partner are thinking of spicing up your sex life with a couple swap. So, here are the pros and cons and guidelines for how to do it right.

The norm states that you shouldn’t be sharing your partner with someone else. However, this unwritten rule has been thwarted, broken, bent, and ignored for centuries. So why not embrace a new norm and explore what’s out there with a couple swap?

If your partner is fully on board with it, sleeping with someone else does not make you a dirtbag cheater. Instead, it makes you an open-minded individual who isn’t afraid of the power of sex.

Many couples nowadays are experimenting with sex and intimacy through threesomes, open relationships, and swinging.

[Read: Non-monogamy and how to know if you and your partner are ready for it]

The difference between open relationships and swinging

Firstly, do not confuse the two. An open relationship means that both parties consent to their partners engaging in sexual activities with other people.

On the other hand, swinging is a lifestyle that embodies partners in committed relationships agreeing to the act of swapping partners with other couples. [Read: 20 open relationship rules you must know if you want to give non-monogamy a try and make sex exciting]

What kind of couple swaps and swinging do you like?

There are a couple of differences within the swinging lifestyle itself, known as a soft swap and a full swap. The former is when couples swap partners and engage in kissing and other sexual acts that do not involve penetration. [Read: What is a soft swap and how to ease your partner into the experience]

The latter is when penetration is involved. Do further research to figure out which one works better for the two of you.

Remember that there are many rules when it comes to the swinging lifestyle. Whether you head to a swinging club, sexy swingers event, or find a like-minded couple on Tinder or a dating app to get it on with, the most important rule is that swinging should not replace your current sex life.

You need to look at swinging as an added bonus that helps propel your sex life to another level.

If the only time you have sex is during your out-on-the-town swinging sessions, then you can safely say that you have a problem with your own relationship. Work on that first before attempting anything else. [Read: How to start swinging with your partner and meeting other like-minded people]

Pros and cons of a couple swap

As with anything, there are advantages and disadvantages to doing a couple swap. While it can be exciting and new, there are some things you need to keep in mind. But let’s start with the pros.

The biggest pros of a sexy couple swap

A couple swap is definitely exciting, and fun. It’ll give you a huge burst of sexual energy and make you and your partner feel like horny bunnies all over again!

1. It’s exciting and naughty

If you have always wanted to add some excitement to your sex life, doing a couple swap can definitely accomplish that goal.

It’s naughty, and most people don’t even think to do it. So, if you are the type of person who wants to live on the edge and not have to conform to society’s rules, then this could be a lot of fun for you as a couple. [Confession: My first accidental threesome with a woman we met while on vacation]

2. Allows you to act out your sexual fantasies

Maybe doing a couple swap has always been a fantasy of yours. Well, now is your chance to try it! Not only can you act out the fantasy of swinging, you can talk about sexual fantasies with the other couple as well.

You are not just limited to doing these with your partner. And maybe a person in the other couple will have the same fantasies as you do. [Read: The do’s and don’ts of swinging that you HAVE to follow]

3. Sexual variety

As much as you probably love your partner, sometimes being monogamous can get boring for some people. The same person year after year doesn’t let you explore a lot of variety.

So, what better way to add some spice than to do it with your partner and another couple?

4. Adventurousness

Not only do you get some variety in terms of people, but you can also try new things that you haven’t done with your partner – or that they don’t like or want to do.

Maybe you’ve always wanted to get wild and try S&M, but you can’t because your better half won’t let you. If you do a couple swap and one of them wants to try it too, then you have the best of both worlds. [Read: The top 50 kinky sex ideas worth experimenting at least once in your lifetime]

5. Allows you to tackle your fears

Let’s face it, humans are naturally jealous beings. And because of this, we usually want to keep our lovers to ourselves.

But if you do a couple swap, you will have to face your fears. You will have to deal with your jealousy and overcome it. But it is a safe space to do that, and you might be a better person because of it.

6. Enhances a happy couple’s relationship

If a couple is already happy, and they decide to do a couple swap, it could enhance and bond them even more.

The reason for this is because they are mutually agreeing to something that they both want to do. Plus, it’s sort of “taboo” in society, which makes them “partners in crime” and they have a little secret between themselves that no one knows about except the other couples who are participating. [Read: Does your wife want to sleep with another man? How to experience this fantasy together]

The scary cons of a couple swap most people don’t talk about

As fun as couple swaps are, whether accidentally on a drunken night, or a planned hookup on a dating app, it does come with its own share of disadvantages as well. So make sure you’re prepared to face these when you come across them.

1. You’ll have to keep it secret

As we just mentioned, because it’s “taboo,” not a lot of other people in your life will understand why you want to do a couple swap.

It’s just not something that most people want to do because they wouldn’t be able to handle it emotionally. So, you might have to keep it a secret from everyone else you know.

2. Partners may not always agree

How do you find a suitable couple for both of you? What if the man finds the other woman attractive, but the woman doesn’t find the other man attractive? Then what?

You have to find a couple where everyone is attracted to everyone else. And that’s not easy to do. [Read: The cuckold fantasy – What you both should know to give it a try in real life]

3. Finding couple swap partners

Another problem is finding people to do this with. You can’t just walk up to someone at a bar and say, “Hey, do you want to do a couple swap with us?”

You could probably go to the internet and find people, but it’s a bit risky.

4. Could take up a lot of time

If you decide to do this, it could take a lot of planning and time. It’s not like you can just have a quickie with your partner and be done with it. There might be parties to attend or simply getting schedules to sync up. [Read: The cuckquean experience – Do you like watching your man with someone else?]

5. Could ruin a relationship

While it can be a fun and exciting thing to do, jealousy can definitely rear its ugly head.

Sure, you can try to overcome the jealousy, but what if you can’t? What if one partner likes it and the other doesn’t? Those kinds of tensions can ruin a relationship. [Read: The most important open relationship questions to know if you BOTH are ready for it]

How to avoid complications a couple swap

Here are the most important couple swap and swinging tips for you to keep in mind, if you want unconventional sex, minus the drama that comes with it.

1. Agree to the lifestyle together

When you look at it from an unconventional point of view, sex can be treated and looked at as a hobby. Just like shooting hoops or baking a cake, it is something that you can do alone, with your partner, and with others.

Just remember that this lifestyle is something that both of you have to agree to. If not, it stands the risk of falling under the category of cheating. [Read: How to talk about sex without sounding like a pervert]

The hardest part of agreeing to the lifestyle together is broaching the subject for the first time. Whether swinging is yours or your partner’s brainchild, there is no denying that the very first conversation that the two of you have about it will be steeped in awkwardness.

Do not be surprised if shame, jealousy, and anger make an appearance. Once you get over the initial hurdle, things start getting much easier as both of you are now on board and will work together to source for the perfect swinging experience.

If your partner is hesitant about making the move to this lifestyle, be patient and do not even think about forcing them into it. This will invite resentment, insecurity and defensiveness, making it very difficult for your partner to ever clamber on board. [Read: 14 things to know to get your partner to open up and talk more about sex]

2. Lay down ground rules

Another way to preserve your relationship is to set the rules with your partner beforehand. Blurred lines and assumptions make one stunning recipe for disaster. Arguments will be bound to arise once jealousy rears its ugly head.

Although you and your partner are open to having sex with other couples, it does not change the fact that you are both human and your emotions will inevitably come into play.

An example of a rule that you can set together is agreeing that neither of you will indulge in a swinging outing without the other. You can also discuss the option of not having any contact with the other couple outside of swinging meet-ups.

Laying down the law when it comes to using protection, staying together at swingers parties and other related issues should also be discussed.

The more ground you cover together, the less likely one or both parties will start an argument and complicate the relationship. [Read: How to prepare for sex – 20 things you must do to enjoy it way more]

3. Invest in trust

Trust is a very important quality to have, if you want to partake in a swinging lifestyle without complicating your own partnership.

If you are the jealous type, start swinging by partaking in a tamer sort of swap, particularly one that involves just a soft swap, and see where it takes you from there.

Some couples take years before finally agreeing to a full swap, so do not worry if it takes you longer than expected to solidify the trust and go all the way. [Read: How to build trust in your relationship and learn to be loyal and loving]

4. Communicate often

Another way to keep your relationship from getting complicated is to communicate often with your spouse. Good communication is perhaps one of the most important things that you need to work on when you enter the world of swinging.

Speak incessantly about what the two of you are hoping to get out of swinging. Do not forget to communicate with your lover about the type of couple you would like to experiment with and so on. So long as you are prepared to compromise with your partner, everything will be just fine. [Read: How to compromise in a relationship and not feel like you lost out]

5. Do not couple swap with friends

A good way to keep your new lifestyle and relationship with your spouse intact is to never swap partners with friends.

Feelings may start developing, jealousy will inevitably come into play and before you know it, a falling out with these friends is bound to happen.

Trust us on this when we say that it is better to keep your friendships and sex life separate. Even better, be classy and keep your swinging lifestyle on the down-low. The last thing you want is for the whole neighborhood and their cousins to know what you and your spouse are up to. [Read: Unicorn hunting – how to find a third sexual partner and do it right]

6. Couple swap with seasoned couples

If you are new to the lifestyle and want to keep things as drama-free as possible, consider swinging with seasoned and experienced couples, at least at first. Not only will they show you the ropes, they will also share with you lifestyle tips that they have picked up along the way.

Just like starting anything new, it is always best to speak to an expert beforehand to get an idea of what to expect, and how to react when the unexpected crops up. [Read: Do you fantasize about cheating? The reasons why your mind goes there]

7. Bring home the eroticism

Finally, the best way to have sex with other couples without complicating your relationship is to bring home the eroticism and sensuality.

Remember that swinging is one of the many tools in life’s toolbox that you can use to keep your sex life fresh and exciting. The whole point of experiencing this unconventional lifestyle is so that you can take home these new experiences with you.

Whether you want to relive what you did or try out something new with your partner, ensure that you keep the sexual attraction between the two of you alive and well. [Read: 30 sexy ways to spice up your sex life and keep each other interesting]

Whether you like watching, being watched, experimenting with props, or just getting it on with someone else, doing a couple swap lets you do it all. Just remember that your relationship with your spouse is the most important one of all. If one of you gets uncomfortable, talk it through and come to an agreement on what to do next.

The post Couple Swap: First Timer’s Guide to Having Sex with Another Couple is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Trophy Wife: What It Is, 22 Ways to Be One & Why All Men Desire One

We’ve all heard the term trophy wife. But what is it, how do you become one, why do men want one, and what are the pros and cons? Here are your answers.

We’ve all seen them. Whether they’re at business conventions, movie premieres, or social events, the stunning female with model looks draped seductively over the arm of a far inferior looking male specimen is something we can’t take our eyes off… a trophy wife.

This is the legendary trophy wife; an accessory for successful men since time immemorial.

Wherever there is ambition, there the trophy wife will be found. And make no mistake about it; there aren’t many guys who would turn down the chance to have one of their own. But why exactly is that the case?

What is a trophy wife?

Simply put, a trophy wife is a status symbol for her husband. The term has a bit of a negative connotation to it because it implies that the woman is nothing but her good looks.

In essence, she lacks intelligence, personality, ambition, or money of her own. She is completely dependent on her husband.

A trophy wife is supposed to be overly concerned about her appearance. She must be skinny, healthy, young, beautiful, and in shape. She must regularly get her hair and nails done, wear makeup 24/7, and generally just maintain a lot of upkeep on her body.

Although this isn’t always the case, typically the trophy wife usually is the second, third, fourth, *or more* wife of a rich older man. [Read: Stay at home wife – 18 reasons why her life is so perfect and enviable]

History of the “trophy wife”

The origination of the term trophy wife isn’t completely clear. However, some people suggest that it appeared in the 1950 issue of The Economist newspaper.

Historically, men who fought wars would sometimes capture the most beautiful women of the lands they conquered. They even brought them home and made them their wives.

As you can see, the term “trophy” implies winning. And if these men won wars, they captured their own “trophy” in the form of a beautiful woman that he forced to marry him.

While that is not the only opinion of where the term came from, it seems to make the most sense. Other people who write books or for magazines also want to claim the credit for coining the term, but we’ll just go with the war explanation since it makes the most sense. [Read: Trophy husband – your golden guide to be a rich girl’s bitch]

Characteristics of a trophy wife

While these are stereotypical characteristics, they are the most common qualities a trophy wife has. So, let’s take a look at them.

1. Doesn’t worry about money

Because trophy wives are almost always married to very rich men, they usually don’t have to work.

Not only that, their husbands buy them anything and everything she wants. She has a mansion, maids, fancy cars, glamorous clothes, yachts, and probably travels the world. [Read: 14 signs you’re being used as a trophy wife only for an ego boost]

2. Physical appearance

As we mentioned above, not just anyone can be a trophy wife. If a rich man was going to have the pick of the litter *so to speak,* don’t you think he will choose the “best one?”

So, the trophy wives are typically young, beautiful, skinny, healthy, and keep up their appearance. [Read: How to be a good sugar baby – 16 secrets to the luxe life]

3. Don’t have much of a relationship with husband

Again, this is a stereotype, but the term “trophy wife” implies that there is not a lot of love and affection between her and her husband.

Instead, the relationship is very superficial and based around money and showing her off. They probably don’t have a lot of private, intimate moments, and they definitely don’t have a friendship or emotional intimacy.

4. Giant diamond ring

Of course, this is kind of a no-brainer. In order to be the perfect trophy wife, you definitely need a huge engagement ring to flash in everyone’s eyes. The more carats the better.

The bigger the diamond, the more successful your husband is. As they say, go big or go home!

How to become a trophy wife

So, you want to be a trophy wife, huh? Well, good luck. It’s not that easy. But regardless, here are some of the things you will have to do. [Read: 33 signs you’re unattractive and all the ugly fixes to get way hotter]

1. Take care of yourself and your body

While this is always a good thing to do to stay healthy, if you want to be a trophy wife you will have to take it to a whole new level.

You can’t change the body structure you were born with, but some trophy wives even go as far as to get plastic surgery and other body enhancements. This is all in addition to eating very little and hitting the gym every day.

2. Meet rich men

You can’t be a trophy wife without a rich husband, right? That’s obvious. So, you’re going to have to put yourself in situations where you can meet them. That’s not always easy to do. But you could sign up with a matchmaker or find dating apps for millionaires. [Read: A girl’s guide to snagging a rich husband or a sugar daddy]

3. Dress sexy

If you want to catch your future husband’s eye, you will have to dial up the sexiness. Make sure your clothes are tight-fitting, your skirts are short, and you wear sky-high heels.

These are the things that rich men look for in a trophy wife. Oh, and don’t forget that this will all lead to sex… so be ready for that anytime. [Read: 27 super sexy ways to be the wife of your husband’s dreams]

4. Be willing to sign a prenuptial agreement

You didn’t think that a rich man would let you marry him without signing a prenuptial agreement, did you? He’s not stupid. He doesn’t want to lose his entire fortune if you happen to get divorced.

So, expect that you will have to sign that little piece of paper before you walk down the aisle. It may or may not be fair to you, but that’s what you’ll have to do if you want to be a trophy wife.

The pros and the cons of a trophy wife

There are many reasons why men seek the company of a trophy wife, a woman who is significantly better looking than them; a real ten-out-of-ten on the stunner scale.

Yes, this can be due to the simple fact of being able to enjoy the physicality of such a beautiful woman, but there are a number of other reasons, usually linked to games of advantage and one-upping others in their immediate social circle. These are discussed in the first of the two following lists.

There are, however, downfalls associated with the trophy wife and we think it’s only fair that we should discuss these as well. [Read: The 23 kinds of relationships to define your love life]

Pros of a trophy wife

Why do men desire a trophy wife? We’re all looking at them as they enter the restaurant, as they step into that classic car, and as they strut down the street looking more than a little pleased with themselves.

Is it just that men love the attention of having a beautiful woman in their arms, or is there something more?

1. The little green-eyed monster

Let’s face it; guys love that first moment when they introduce her to their friends and/or colleagues and their jaws hit the ground in amazement.

Soliciting this jealous reaction from others is one of the main reasons that the trophy wife is so popular, with all the petulant joy it brings! [Read: 34 physical traits of a woman that arouse any man instantly]

2. Professional prestige

Taking along a trophy wife to a professional event is likely to make a boss sit up and take notice.

A guy who can have a woman like that on his arm must be a real go-getter, an action man of the highest order. It’s a guaranteed way to get yourself noticed the next time the promotions are handed out.

3. Control

Trophy wives are usually very aware of what they are, and happy to compromise any other principles they may have.

Consequently, they are unlikely to challenge and criticize your decisions and opinions in the manner that other women may. This means an easy life guaranteed for the man who doesn’t have much about him. [Read: How to be a sexy goddess who’s desired by all men]

4. The fast track

It’s not only in your professional life that having a trophy wife adorning your arm works out for the best. Watch locked doors open and queues suddenly shorten as people make an effort to fast track you and your human jewelry down the corridors of life.

From airplanes to lines at the nightclub, you will start to glide through life that little bit easier.

5. You can’t be serious

A trophy wife is undeniably fun. She knows her place in life and doesn’t pretend to be anything else.

She’s there to make you look good and feel good and that’s the role she performs. Always the life and soul of the party, she’ll ensure that you never have a dull evening—one way or another!

6. The mystery factor

There’s nothing more guaranteed to get people guessing about you than the presence of a trophy wife.

What are you? A big businessman, a politician, a superstar, a Bond-esque secret agent? It’s all fantastically ego-building stuff. [Read: 25 awesomely bad ways to be a total badass]

7. Young at heart

It’s probably fair to say that the trophy wife is usually found upon the arm of a gentleman significantly older than herself.

And there is something significantly rejuvenating about spending personal time in the company of a younger, beautiful woman. As they say, you’re only as old as the woman you feel! [Read: Why men always fall for the damsel in distress]

Cons of a trophy wife

Unfortunately, it’s not all fun-filled nights of champagne and jealous stares. Having a trophy wife in your life also has some significant downsides.

1. Deep pockets required

The most obvious disadvantage to a trophy wife is that if you’re going to run a Ferrari, then you have to pay a great deal more in maintenance.

Trophies don’t come cheap, and an occasional wallet-saver dinner at the local burger joint is never an option. For this lady, it’s swanky restaurants, luxury clothing, expensive cosmetic procedures, catwalk accessories, and champagne and caviar, every step of the way. [Read: How to look rich – 40 posh ways to look like you’re rolling in cash]

2. Till death do us part?

Trophy wives will tend to stick with someone who lavishes enough attention on them, but only until the next richer and better-looking option comes along.

Be prepared to be ditched for a newer, more extravagant model. And trust us, most trophy wives won’t think twice about making that change. [Read: The 7 kinds of women who will end up just wasting your time]

3. Dangerous liaisons

Being a perfect 10, she can get any man she wants—and that rich, magazine centerfold stud that strolled into the bar is going to walk away with her telephone number at the end of the night. Infidelity is the curse of any trophy wife relationship.

4. Something missing

If there’s more to you than your acquisition of a trophy wife would suggest, you’re going to find the relationship very unfulfilling very quickly.

They aren’t renowned for their scintillating conversation and you may just find yourself pining for a woman who knows her own mind. [Read: 23 classy traits of a real woman that awe and mesmerize everyone around her]

5. Beating the cliché

If you are the typical older man in this relationship, then expect the whisperers to engage in conversation at every opportunity your turned back presents.

The rumormongers will be calling you every creepy old man epithet under the sun, and this isn’t really the ideal way for people to get to know you—in any arena. [Read: The sneaky signs you’re dating a 24K gold digger!]

6. Raised eyebrows

Not the kind she gets every time she goes for her refreshing syringe of Botox, but the kind your friends display when she attempts conversation at the restaurant.

If she’s not the greatest of conversationalists, prepare to be embarrassed!

7. Accumulative stress

With all the embarrassments, worries, and expenses of maintaining a trophy wife, is it actually worth having one? That is of course for you to decide, but there aren’t many men who can afford to manage such stresses without significant aplomb.

It’s no coincidence that many men who marry trophy wives end up with different women later in their lives. It’s exhausting, expensive, and mentally draining to manage a trophy wife—with no real guarantee that she’ll stay with you in the end.

[Read: 15 signs a girl is high maintenance and not just a trophy wife]

Some men, however, still love the prestige that a beautiful woman affords. If that’s you, then go ahead and search out your particular piece of human jewelry – your trophy wife. Just make sure you’re ready for the pitfalls too.

The post Trophy Wife: What It Is, 22 Ways to Be One & Why All Men Desire One is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.