28 Kissing Tips & Secret Techniques to Make You a Much Better Kisser

Everyone thinks they know the best kissing techniques, but how does your partner rate your smooch? Master these kissing tips and blow your partner’s mind!

The one thing that can really make or break your chances with someone new is the first kiss. Even though it may seem really superficial, many people decide in that moment if they want to continue things with you or not. For that reason, knowing a few kissing techniques will help you to make the perfect first impression.

Kissing is a pretty intimate thing. Most people play down the significance of pressing your lips to someone else’s but, come on, it’s a pretty big deal!

By knowing a few kissing tips, you’ll be able to wow your partner, whether you intend to stay with them forever or not! [Read: 15 types of kisses – Deciphering the truth behind their smooch]

The five different types of kisses

You might assume that a kiss is just a kiss, but it’s so much more than that! There are different types of kisses you need to know about. So, when learning kissing tips, know which type of smooch you’re going for!

1. The goodnight kiss

The goodnight kiss is about making a lasting impression that will leave a mark on your date’s mind. It has to be done at the right moment to avoid any embarrassing misunderstandings. This is one of the kissing techniques to master, for sure! [Read: 29 secrets to have the perfect first kiss]

2. The private kiss

This is the kiss that starts out in an intimate and private setting. You could say that this is the preceding kiss that leads to an intense make-out session.

There are sometimes a lot of awkward starts involved, but the end culminates with a sweet kiss that builds up to a passionate one.

3. The can’t-get-enough-of-you kiss

This is the immediate make-out kiss. There are no preliminary chaste kisses involved. It usually starts off with two people colliding with each other to form an incomprehensible ball of desire. [Read: 10 ways to have the perfectly passionate kiss]

4. The surprise kiss

Much like the can’t-get-enough-of-you kiss, this one is also fueled by passion. The only difference is that only one person knows that it is about to happen.

It can happen in an elevator, while you’re quietly watching television, or even while you’re cooking.

5. The ultimate kiss

This is the kiss that everyone has been looking for all their lives. It can also be called the Sexy Kiss because of the nature of its performance. It is a sensual and slow kiss that can leave a person shivering from head to toe.

Remember that if someone really likes you, they won’t care if you’re a bad kisser

The thing with kissing is that you can easily improve with practice. Sure, you want to impress a person right away with your kissing skills but even if they’re not up to par, that person won’t mind if they truly like you. [Read: 11 signs of a bad kisser and how to fix it]

If anything, they’ll be willing to practice with you and even tell you what they like. So keep in mind that if you’re trying to learn how to kiss better for someone in particular, getting them to like you first will lessen the need for it.

Put simply, we all worry that we’re bad at kissing, but by learning some useful kissing tips and techniques, you’ll be able to kick that care out of your mind. [Read: First kiss red flags – What you can learn about someone who doesn’t kiss you well]

The best kissing techniques to leave them weak in the knees

Many people look at kisses in the movies and think, “why can’t I be kissed like that?” However, those kisses are calculated, planned, and even choreographed to look amazing and desirable. Wouldn’t it feel great to give someone a kiss that will make even the best on-screen smooch seem lame?

What you have to remember is that some kisses just don’t work out straightaway. That’s fine, you just need to figure out a little damage control in the heat of the moment! Being able to laugh about it and try again always helps.

The best kisses make your heart race, knees weak, and definitely leave you wanting a lot more. Those kisses all have certain things in common. Master these kissing techniques and you’ll be dolling out heartbeat-skipping kisses in no time. [Read: 12 foolproof kissing tips for that picture perfect smooch]

1. Make sure the kiss is wanted

This is one of the most important kissing tips out there. Gauge the other person’s reaction to your proximity throughout the evening. If they shy away when you get closer, maybe you should reconsider going in for the kiss.

If you’re finding that they’re moving closer and even initiating some contact between you, you’re probably safe.

2. Pick the right time and place

Timing is almost as important as the kiss itself. If you mess up the timing, things can get awkward really quickly.

The best time to lean in and smooch is when you have naturally drawn closer together. This is usually toward the end of the date/night when you are both feeling comfortable around each other. [Read: When to kiss a girl – 33 subtle signs to predict the magic moment]

3. Move slowly

Too drastic of a move makes it hard to gauge their reaction and makes it difficult for you to change something if it’s not appealing to them. When you move in for the kiss, do so at a slow *but not too slow* pace.

Easing your way into it builds the anticipation, and that’s a huge factor when it comes to making it a heartbeat-skipping kiss. Kissing techniques aren’t all about doing anything fancy, it’s sometimes just being able to read the other person. [Read: How to get a guy to kiss you when you want him to]

4. Start softly

When your lips finally touch, don’t shove your face as hard as you can against theirs. Very gently and softly touch your lips to theirs. The softness will create a tenderness that will be unmatched.

They will be asking *almost begging* for more.

5. Work up to it

By this, we mean put the idea in their head early on and work up to the kiss. Initiate physical contact *innocently* throughout the night.

Get closer to them as the night goes on and set yourself up to give them that amazing kiss. [Read: How to seduce someone with words and leave them weak in the knees]

6. Hand placement is key

When you’re finally ready to move into the kiss, you’ll need somewhere to put your hands. It’s always awkward kissing someone without touching them in any other way. It reminds you of two little kids planting their first kiss on someone – sad and uncomfortable.

Kissing techniques don’t always come down to what you do with your lips!

When you go in for the kiss, put one or both hands on the sides of their face. If you only use one hand to grab their face, use the other to grab them by the waist and pull them in gently so they’re that much closer to you. [Read: How to kiss a girl for the first time and not screw up]

7. Be aware of body language

Pay attention to their body language. If they’re pulling away, crossing their arms, or seem like they’re keeping their distance, the kiss might have to wait. However, if they lean in and accept your kiss, gauge if they want more.

If they’re still lingering after you’ve given that first heartbeat-skipping kiss, lean in for another and carry it on so it’s a little bit longer of a kiss. Only this time, make it a little more urgent and needy.

Body language can tell you a lot about whether or not you’re doing a great job. It will lead to that amazing, unforgettable kiss. [Read: 15 secrets to make your first kiss really memorable]

8. Keep your eyes closed!

Just keep them closed. Don’t open your eyes unless your lips are not touching each other’s. It makes things awkward and uncomfortable if you catch them looking at you, too.

And that can kind of ruin the moment.

9. Use a breath mint, please!

Bad breath = horrible kiss. When all someone can pay attention to is how bad your breath is, it takes away from the rest of the amazing things you’re putting into your kiss to make it incredible. Just chew a mint or some gum shortly before the end of your date.

10. Keep your lips soft and kissable

Nobody wants to kiss dry, cracked lips. They’re very noticeable and uncomfortable. Keep your lips plumped and soft with some chapstick throughout the night/day.

Do NOT “moisturize” your lips by licking them. This just makes them wet and gives them a slobbery quality – not good. [Read: How to look after yourself as a woman – 19 ways to power yourself]

11. Keep your lips slightly parted

When you kiss someone, closed lips make it impossible to mold your lips to theirs. However, lips that are too open are just a gateway for slobber and too much tongue.

Keep your lips slightly parted and soft- just enough so you can mold your lips to theirs.

12. Don’t use your tongue during the first kiss

At least not at first. Tongue should be something that is initiated by the other person. Tongue comes after your initial kiss because it’s amazing. Throwing in some tongue too early can be awkward and uncomfortable for the other person.

What if they don’t want your tongue in their mouth just yet? Skip the tongue if you want to give them a heartbeat-skipping kiss. [Read: 20 secrets to kiss with tongue and make them crave for a lot more of you]

13. Keep it short and sweet

Don’t drag it out so long. A heartbeat-skipping kiss is one that is just brief enough for someone’s heart to actually skip a beat. It’s short, sweet, simple, and, if done correctly, will leave them coming back for more right away.

14. Don’t force it, let it happen naturally

If you’re finding that you’re struggling to make the kiss work and things aren’t coming together in the way you thought, then just leave it at that and don’t force the kiss.

No great, knee-buckling kisses were ever made by force. [Read: How to kiss a guy for the first time and leave him feeling turned on]

15. Just relax!

One of the most important kissing techniques most guys and girls completely overlook is this – Just take a deep breath! In order to give a truly amazing, toe-tingling kiss, you need to be relaxed. The whole process of kissing the person should be as natural and relaxed as possible.

If you’re calm and things happen naturally, the person on the receiving end of your amazing kiss will feel at ease, allowing them to fully enjoy it.

Your first kiss with someone new will always be a little nerve-wracking. If you don’t feel butterflies and slight nerves, you don’t like them that much!

Use those butterflies to add to the passion when you kiss that special someone and give them a smooch to remember! [Read: The simple moves that will make every kiss of yours feel passionate and romantic]

16. Connect mentally

Even if you’re just looking to make out with someone at a bar on the weekend, having a mental and emotional connection will make them think you’re a better kisser than you are. And although that’s not really a way to become a better kisser, it still works in your favor.

As far as kissing tips are concerned, it might not be the easiest, but it works.

17. Linger a little after

After you plan a sweet kiss on their lips, let your forehead rest against theirs for just a moment. Then move away and smile at them. It’s a very simple move, but it creates a bond.

Having that connection makes you a much better kisser than those who just pull away right after a kiss. [Read: Science of attraction – 17 things that are far more sexy than looks]

18. Let them come back for more

Don’t be the one to lean in for another kiss after the first. In fact, pull out of the kiss a little early. Give them a slow, smooth kiss and then break away.

Let them come back for another. This is a huge sign they really liked the kiss and it’ll make you seem like a better kisser simply because they’re the one going back for more. [Read: How to make a girl want you more]

19. Don’t overdo it with the setting

You don’t need to prepare a bed of roses or take your partner to a moon-lit lake. All you need is privacy, a quiet environment and a comfortable set-up. You can do this in your living room, bedroom, in the park or before you say good night to each other on the porch.

It’s not that important where you kiss a person. The important thing is that the setting feels right, if not perfect. As far as kissing tips are concerned, you don’t need to force the setting or try and overdo it.

20. The best kisses happen because of feelings

Love is a significant factor, but it’s not necessary to give a kiss like this. You and your partner need to feel secure with each other.

You have to like each other enough for this kiss to work. If not, you could just end up seducing your partner without feeling anything at all. [Read: Find out how to kiss a friend and get away with it!]

21. Show them you want to kiss them by using ‘the look’

In order to give the perfectly sexy kiss, you need to start by prepping your partner. Stand still and look into each other’s eyes. It’s okay to blink. Just appreciate the moment and show everything you’re feeling through a smoldering gaze. [Read: 10 tips to master the art of flirting with your eyes]

22. Know where to touch

Common sense denotes that touching private parts can immediately destroy your chances for a second date. So, here are the common places you can touch to make your kissing technique better.

a. Hands

By touching your partner’s hands, you’re establishing a feeling of comfort before you give them a kiss.

b. Arms

The arms are a more personal space compared to the hands. It makes the both of you feel more secure if you’re holding on to them.

c. Face

A lot of articles and studies have said that touching a person’s face can produce unparalleled feelings of attraction compared to other exposed parts of the body. Expect your partner’s heart to skip a beat once you do this. [Read: 16 ways to strengthen your bond through an innocent touch]

23. End the kiss with a little passion

To end the kiss, you have to put a bit more pressure – pain-free pressure – to the kiss before slightly sucking on your partner’s lower lip and then gradually moving away. This is a sexy type of kiss that could lead firmly toward full on making out! [Read: 10 sexy ways to turn a guy on with just the first kiss]

These kissing tips will make you a smooch master!

The kissing tips you’ve just read are sure to give you confidence because now you know what to do. But, perhaps the most important tip of them all isn’t on this list – to follow your instincts.

You can learn all about kissing techniques but the truth is that there is no solid right or wrong way to kiss someone. We all like different things! However, the tips and tricks we’ve mentioned will keep you on the right lines and stop you from veering towards slobber-street.

[Read: 22 second date tips and rules to get to know each other and fall harder]

Everybody wants to have that knee-weakening, heartbeat-skipping kiss. By following these kissing techniques and tips, you’ll be the one to give them a kiss they’ll never forget.

The post 28 Kissing Tips & Secret Techniques to Make You a Much Better Kisser is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Clitoris Stimulation: 19 Secret Touches to Leave a Girl Squirming for More

It’s important to add clitoris stimulation to your sexual repertoire. Learning how to stimulate the clitoris will make your partner very happy indeed!

Every person walking this planet wants to know how to wow their partner in bed. But when it comes to pleasing a woman, many men fall short. We’re not saying it’s their fault, because it hasn’t been until recently that we started to talk about female pleasure, the art of clitoris stimulation, or even what women really need to get turned on!

Before, it was assumed women weren’t sexual. We still don’t know much about the clitoris, but although the clitoris may look small and insignificant, it’s one fierce body part that everyone should know. If you want to make your partner squirm with pleasure, clitoris stimulation is the way to go. [Read: Female confessions – The feeling of oral sex for women]

Wait, what is the clitoris?

Okay, the first thing to master before learning how to stimulate the clitoris, is learning where it actually is.

The clitoris is a small button of nerve endings that feels super-sensitive to the touch. It has a hood of skin over the top, which can be pulled back to add further pleasure when the woman is aroused.

It is located right at the top of the vulva, where the labia meet, above the urethral opening – yes, where she pees.

While this little “button” may appear small, it actually extends behind the vulva and is directly connected to the G-spot *allegedly*! Furthermore, much like the penis, the clitoris also gets engorged once aroused, making the phrase “getting a hard on” applicable to both men and women. [Read: How to eat a girl out – 15 secrets to make her scream and squirt]

How to stimulate the clitoris and make your partner moan!

The vast majority of women, up to 70%, require clitoris stimulation during intercourse to achieve orgasm. That makes knowing how to maneuver around this sensitive little area your most important move when it comes to sexual satisfaction.

Here are a few things you should be doing in order to bring pleasure through the clitoris. [Read: The 10 most arousing erogenous zones for women all men should know]

1. Repetition is key

Women’s bodies, specifically the clit, respond best to repetition. If you’re using circular motions and she’s getting into it, don’t start switching to up and down motions!

Always pay attention to your woman’s responses to know which motions she’d like you to keep doing.

2. Oral is the way to go

Many women respond strongly to oral sex and feel that this is the only way they can orgasm with their partner. Whether you’re simply looking to get her excited or you want to show her the final destination, oral is a great starting point.

A great oral sex move is using your tongue to swirl the alphabet around your partner’s clit. This is a great way to make sure you’re moving your tongue around, and it’s also good for learning which movements your partner responds to best.

Remember not to ignore other sensitive areas of the vulva, either. Lick around the thighs, lips, and opening *if she’s into that* to give her an even more tantalizing experience. [Read: 8 tips and tricks to give her oral sex like a pro]

3. Use your hands

We know it’s important to find out what your partner likes, but it’s equally as important to find out how she likes it. There are many different ways to touch the clitoris.

A couple of ways to stimulate the clitoris include:

a. Touching with circular motions [Read: 20 physical signs of female arousal to recognize a girl feeling horny]

b. With direct stimulation

c. Massaging the clitoris while the hood is still over it

d. Rubbing it between your thumb and forefinger or between the lips of the vagina

e. Going up and down

f. Using lube and letting your fingers simply slip around [Read: How to use lubricants to liven up your sex life instantly]

7. By practicing some other technique your girl has discovered

It should also be noted that if you’re bringing your hands anywhere near the vagina, make sure your nails are clipped and clean. Unwanted bacteria can cause UTIs, which are super painful and totally not sexy. [Read: How to finger a girl – 21 delicate moves to make her wet and orgasm]

4. Friction through dry humping

Friction is a much-needed friend to clitoral orgasms. While the name doesn’t scream hot and sexy, dry humping is an amazing way to please the clitoris.

With your girl on top of you, have her grind up against your penis. This is a great way for girls to achieve orgasm. Make sure you are both wearing underwear for maximum friction. You can do this in the missionary position too, but it will be easier for her to navigate her pleasure zones if she’s on top.

A naked version of this can also be done, but it may start to get a little slippery! If you do this naked in cowgirl position and she gets too wet to stay on track, simply switch positions or grab your penis, and start rubbing it in circles around her clit. She’ll thank you for it! [Read: Dry humping and the virgin’s guide to orgasms]

5. Intercourse with clitoris stimulation

After you’ve engaged in a long, exciting session of foreplay and have your girl wet and excited, you’re probably ready to get down to business – intercourse. For many women, it is very hard to orgasm during intercourse without clitoral stimulation.

Here are some easy, sexy positions that offer great clitoral stimulation.

a. Doggy style

In this position, you have the option to reach around and play with her clitoris, or give her the opportunity to play with herself using her fingers or a sex toy. [Read: 9 ways to make doggy style your favorite position]

b. Missionary – CAT position

This is a great position for clitoral stimulation. Get into the regular missionary position and then move above her, so that your pelvis is grinding against her clit as you thrust. [Read: 8 ways to make missionary sex magical]

c. Girl on top

This position is great, whether she is in cowgirl or reverse cowgirl, as she has the opportunity to find the best position to grind her clitoris against you and reach orgasm. If she’s the bouncing type, you can also use your thumb on her clitoris as she does her thing. [Read: 30 girl on top tips to make sex a lot sexier]

6. Throw in some sex toys

When in doubt, use a sex toy! A pocket rocket is a great toy to incorporate into your sex life.

It’s not intimidating and is small enough that you can use it on your partner’s clit while you’re inside her or during foreplay to get her all riled up.

7. Avoid fast back and forth motions

Slow is okay, but fast can hurt! It must be said that this signature porn move of putting your fingers over the vagina or clit and moving it back and forth like a pendulum on speed does not feel good at all. It also makes you look incredibly amateur when it comes to your understanding of how to stimulate the clitoris.

The only time this should be done is if she is already very wet and excited. Otherwise, you’re more likely to hurt and inflame the clit. Go slow, lovers! She’s not going anywhere. [Read: 12 questions about female sexuality – finally answered]

8. There’s no need to pull back the hood

For lovers who know what they’re doing down south of a woman, they know that the clit lies beneath its protective hood *akin to the foreskin*.

This knowledge is fantastic, but that doesn’t mean you should be rushing to pull the clitoral hood up right off the bat. Most women will find this too intense, even bordering on painful.

There is usually no need to do this if your girl is excited enough, as the clit will expand on its own when aroused and allow for marvelous, engorged touching opportunities. [Read: How to turn a girl on and sexually stimulate her mind]

9. Gentle movements only – pressure is painful!

Think of the clitoris like a penis for a moment. When your partner is pleasuring your penis with their hand, you want to make sure their grip isn’t moving too fast, too slow, too soft, or too hard. It has to be just right. It is the same with the clit.

Putting too much pressure on the clit is uncomfortable and definitely not pleasurable. If you have a penis, you know how sensitive its 4,000 nerve endings can be, but the clit has twice that number! The clit contains 8,000 nerve endings that, when stimulated, can affect 15,000 separate nerve endings throughout the body.

That baby’s super sensitive, so be nice! [Read: Everything you need to know about orgasmic meditation]

10. There is such a thing as ‘too much’

As much as your lover may appreciate you trying to give her endless orgasms, the clit is a fickle mistress who sometimes just doesn’t feel like more.

While the clitoris has the amazing and mind-boggling capability to bring about multiple orgasms, there are times when, once she’s been satisfied, clitoral stimulation may actually end up turning pleasure into very intense pain.

In short, check with your lady love about whether she’s down with multiple O’s before you start your very thoughtful journey back to her sweet spots. [Read: The step-by-step guide to achieving multiple orgasms]

11. Foreplay needs to be an ‘everywhere’ deal!

If you don’t know this by now, foreplay is absolutely essential to making a woman see fireworks. Women need a lot of attention in the bedroom and need a certain level of arousal if an orgasm is ever going to happen.

Pay attention to her erogenous zones such as her butt, neck, breasts, and inner thighs, and don’t skimp on using your hand, tongue, sex toy, or penis *without penetration* to stimulate her clit before any sex happens! [Read: Squirting – How to stimulate a girl’s clitoris and make her squirt]

12. Don’t be afraid to do some research

If you don’t know much about the clitoris, you should research it. Find out where the clitoris is and learn about why it’s such a crucial part of the female body.

By knowing the basics, you’ll be able to work off of it and not feel like you’re going into the situation blind.

13. Communication is sexy!

Perhaps the way you’ve stimulated your past partner won’t work the same for your current partner. Or maybe you’ve never stimulated a clitoris before, and you’re nervous. These are perfectly normal situations, so why not talk about it with your partner?

Maybe she can help you out and she’ll be super-impressed that you care about her pleasure so much.

14. Watch how she does it

You may be a little nervous or unsure of what she likes, and if that’s the case, why don’t you watch your partner masturbate?

As she touches herself, you’ll be able to see what she likes, that is, if she’s someone who practices masturbation. If she is, you don’t need to reinvent the wheel; you need to focus on what she enjoys. [Read: How to masturbate – 14 sexy self pleasure tips to discover yourself]

15. Simple clitoral stimulation is always best

You don’t need to perform a circus show to impress her. What many people do is try to incorporate some fancy technique or do something out of the ordinary to impress their partner. But, keeping it simple will take you much further.

Then, once you become more comfortable with stimulating the clitoris, you can experiment with new techniques and see how it goes.

16. Change the number of fingers you use

You can start with one finger, but who said you had to stick to just one? While stimulating the clitoris with your fingers, move from using one finger to two, three, even a full hand. This will give even more stimulation as each finger strokes the clitoris right after the other one. [Read: How to use your fingers to make a girl orgasm]

17. Don’t be afraid to experiment

The time to experiment is now! Of course, your go-to move will probably be to start rubbing up and down, but that’s not going to work for everyone.

When it comes to clitoris stimulation, experiment with different stroking techniques such as up and down, side-to-side, and indirect stimulation by stroking the sides of the clit or the clitoral hood. Mix these strokes up and see what combination works best.

Don’t worry about trying different things – she will tell you what she likes or doesn’t like through her moans. [Read: 21 secrets to be more sexual and fall in love with the sexy side of you]

18. Give edging a try

Once you feel more comfortable with stimulating the clitoris, switch up your technique. Edging is building up to climax, and just when your partner is about to reach that point, you stop stimulating the clitoris.

This will take some communication between you and your partner, as you need to know when they’re about to climax. Start slow, build the intensity, and then pull back. You can do this for as long as your partner can handle it. [Read: What is edging? How to orgasm harder and better than ever before]

19. Don’t get lost in the moment – pay attention to her

We often hear this question: how can you know when she’s enjoying herself? Oh, you’ll know. If you want to learn what your partner likes, pay attention to her reactions.

If she’s laying in complete silence, the odds are she’s not feeling it. But if she’s moaning, grabbing the sheets, and telling you she wants more, then keep doing what you’re doing. [Read: What does sex feel like for a woman?]

Dedicate yourself to her pleasure

A good lover is an unselfish lover. By showing your partner that you want to give her the best time possible, she will want to return the favor by showing you ultimate pleasure too. You can do that by learning how to stimulate the clitoris.

Be the one who wants to give her the best orgasm possible and it will not only make your sex life ten times better, but it will probably increase your bond outside of the bedroom too.

[Read: 10 kinky sex positions for a wild night every day of the week]

There are plenty of ways to please your partner via clitoral stimulation if you learn some basic techniques and keep an open dialogue with your lover. Remember, taking the time to learn about the clit is what will take you from a mediocre partner to an amazing one!

The post Clitoris Stimulation: 19 Secret Touches to Leave a Girl Squirming for More is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

First Kiss Tips: 29 Secrets to Make the First Smooch Sexy & Irresistible

The first kiss is important. It can make or break the success of your first date and decide whether you progress to a second or not.

A first kiss isn’t just a kiss. It’s a step towards intimacy, and yet, it’s a confusing affair that could go either way.

A first kiss could lead to many more perfect kisses, or it could be the end of a budding romance. We place a lot of pressure on ourselves to get that first smooch right, but it’s important to make a good impression at the very least.

Almost everything you do for the first time is scary. You probably experience a range of overwhelming emotions, including fear, apprehension, worry, insecurity, excitement, joy, relief, and so many more. The same thing can be said when it comes to your first kiss ever, or with someone new.

We all have to do it at some point in our lives, whether with some random person, your partner, or your friend. It is part of your learning process, and it paves the way for romantic relationships to blossom. [Read: The major first time make-out red flags that lead to a toxic relationship]

Why is the first kiss such a big deal?

You could argue that we make far too much of a big deal out of it when it comes to kissing someone new for the first time. Unless it’s your first actual kiss ever, why are you so worried? Even if it is your first-ever kiss, why not focus on the positives – it’s a fun thing to do and a memorable milestone. 

Kissing is just showing affection. So, you could argue that any kiss is good because any form of showing affection is good. But, we all know that a bad kiss can basically put the brakes on any future relationship. If you’ve ever had a terrible kiss with someone, you’ll know that it tends to linger in the mind.

Perhaps that’s the reason why we place so much pressure on ourselves that first time with someone new. We’re worried they’re going to be a terrible kisser and all that flirtation and fun will be wasted. Or, even worse, you worry that you’ll mess up somehow and make them think the same of you! [Read: 23 kissing techniques for that heartbeat-skipping kiss]

The top secrets to make your first kiss perfect

All it takes is a little preparation and a few handy tips and you’ll be knocking that first kiss performance out of the park before you know it!

1. Plan ahead

A first kiss never pops right out of the blue. Even if it seems like an unplanned heat-of-the-moment thing, the setting you create around each other is what gives you the opportunity.

The best time to kiss a date or a friend is when you’ve spent quite a while with each other, either on a date or while watching a movie at home. That gives you enough time to warm up to each other. And most importantly, you need to find a way to get some alone time with no one around.

Plan ahead so both of you can get some alone time at the end of the date, either in the car, a lonely park bench, or at your place. [Read: 6 ways to kiss a friend accidentally and get away with it]

2. Build the sexual tension

Your date must want to kiss you back, or at the least, you must know that your date will reciprocate it before you try kissing. Try to sit close to your date. It’s a great way to pass your sexual vibes to them. And most importantly, speak in a low and soft voice – speaking softly is a natural turn on.

Talk about how wonderful you feel spending time with this person, or talk about how enjoyable the day was. [Read: How to get a girl horny just by sitting next to her]

3. Avoid distractions

Distractions are the bane of first kisses. You won’t believe the number of first kisses missed because of a cell phone ringing at the wrong time or a bladder full of pee.

Isolate yourself in the moment and make sure your date isn’t thinking of anything other than this beautiful moment with you.

4. Location, location, location!

Location plays a big part in a kiss. If you play your cards well, a first kiss could lead to a lot more within minutes.

If people walking past you bothers you, kiss your date in a parking lot or in your place. But make sure you keep the location in mind if you want to go beyond just a first kiss.

Even if you don’t, not being bothered by your surroundings is important. [Read: Where to kiss a girl – 15 sexiest hot spots to arouse her instantly]

5. Hygiene

Bad breath ruins any chances of a first kiss. If you’re planning to kiss your date after a garlic-infused dinner or a long drive, make sure you pop a breath mint into your mouth.

If you want to make your first kiss feel a lot sexier, drink a sip of water a few seconds before trying to kiss your date. It makes your lips feel moist and a lot more kissable.

6. Know the right kind of touch

The way you touch your new lover while trying to cozy up with them makes all the difference in a perfect first kiss. Constantly touch your date on their arms or play with their fingers. Let your date feel comfortable with and enjoy your touch.

And once you’re feeling bold enough to go for the kiss, whisper in their ear now and then or play with their hair. Nothing sends the kissing signal out better than that. [Read: 20 things that turn a guy on about a girl]

7. Help your date read your mind

If you’ve used all the tips so far and your date reciprocates your touches by touching you back or moving closer to you, you’ve done all the right things. So hurrah for you!

Now you need to let your date know that you want to kiss them. Move close to your date’s face, and wait for them to move in closer to you. If all goes well, you’ll be kissing your date and making out with them in no time.

But if your date doesn’t move closer to kiss you, it doesn’t matter. You need to create other ways to excite them sexually. Move close to them and place your palm on their cheek or graze your lips on their cheek, really close to their lips.

If your date closes their eyes to take in the sensation, they’re obviously ready for the kiss. But if they don’t respond, back off a little and give them the space they need. [Read: 15 types of kisses – Deciphering the truth behind their smooch]

8. Take it really slow

Once you start kissing your date for the first time, don’t get carried away and get aggressive instantly. Feel your date’s lips softly touch your own and spend a few seconds trying to understand who takes the upper lip or who takes the lower lip.

Trust us, that one thing alone can lead to confusions if you’re already used to a particular type of kissing. Improvise your kissing style as the seconds stretch on. [Read: 17 secrets to make sparks fly when both your lips meet for the first time]

9. Be careful when using your tongue

Don’t use your tongue immediately as you start kissing your date for the first time, but don’t keep it hidden either.

Slide your tongue in just a tiny bit until you touch your date’s lips with your tongue. If they reciprocate, you’re doing it just right.

Beyond the first thirty seconds or so, it’s okay to get a little bold and explore just a little more, very softly, of course! [Read: How to kiss with tongue and make someone crave way more of you]

10. Learn to keep your hands busy

Once you’ve got your lips busy, what do you do with your hands? For starters, place your hands on the sides or the back of your kissing mate. If you want to turn the passion on, you can run one hand through your date’s hair or move it along the neck.

When you want to get bolder, place your hands on your partner’s sides and move them along the sides of their body, inches away from any strategic locations. If everything goes well, your hands should get rather busy in a short while! [Read: How to make out with a girl and make her love it!]

11. Don’t worry about timing

First kisses aren’t measured in seconds. They’re measured in passionate moments. A perfect kiss isn’t just one kiss, it’s a series of well-timed first kisses.

Kiss your date for a few seconds, and move your head back slowly, but keep it within a few inches from your date’s face. It makes you feel more in control, and you’ll be able to read your date’s expression too.

If your date backs away, you need to wait. If they come closer and start kissing you again, they like what you’re doing.

A good technique is to move your face back just a little bit after several seconds, and come in for another kiss within a second or two. It shows that you want to kiss, so it won’t leave your date wondering if you’re not interested in kissing them.

By taking occasional breaks and moving in for a kiss again, you’ll be able to increase the passion and make your date want your kisses even more. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules to remember if you’re kissing a friend]

12. Vary the kisses

Start with a really soft kiss, and follow them up with another soft kiss. But once the kisses start to get frequent, vary the pace and the pressure of the kisses. That’ll leave your date confused in a passionate frenzy of kisses, and they’ll start to get wilder and more aggressive too!

13. Don’t stop at the lips

A kiss may start at the lips but could end anywhere else. After a few minutes of intense kissing, don’t stagnate the game by restricting your kisses only to the lips.

Every now and then, kiss your date’s cheek, the chin, or their neck in between all the kisses on the lips.

It gives you access to more places and makes the whole experience sizzle a lot more. [Read: Stop ignoring erogenous zones – The perfect neck kisses]

14. Don’t push it

Don’t try too hard to reach out to too many places too soon. If the first kiss goes well, you know there will definitely be many more dates with many more kisses too. So unless you’re certain your date likes where your hands are going, don’t try to reach out to too many places.

Perfect the first kiss and create a memorable experience first. Letting your hands wander into your date’s pants comes later – if that’s what they want too, of course. [Read: How a guy’s size down there actually matters to girls]

15. Always watch the signs

Learn when to back off. If your date stiffens up, pulls away quickly, or seems distracted while kissing, move your head back just a few inches.

Don’t kill the mood by asking your date why they’re distracted. Just stay close to their face and focus on their neck or their ears.

If your date has something to say, they’ll say it. If they don’t say anything, get back to the lips and pucker your lips for another long series of sexy first kisses. [Read: 30 super sexy ways to keep a guy interested in you]

16. Keep it private – before and after

Make sure you’re both somewhere private and comfortable, where there are no prying eyes. For a memorable first kiss, it needs to be in a special place, away from spectators. Then, you can focus on each other, close your eyes if you want to, and enjoy the moment.

But, that also means keeping it private afterward. Don’t go telling all your friends immediately – respect your kissing mate and keep it between the two of you – for now! [Read: How to arouse your date and make them want to kiss you already]

17. Make sure you’re on the same page

Read the room! Don’t be the one leaning in with your pouty lips while your partner or date is talking on the phone or eating.

It’s imperative you both want to kiss each other at that very moment—and trust us, you’ll know the moment when it comes. [Read: 33 subtle signs to know when to kiss a girl and pick the right moment]

Different types of first kisses, and how to navigate them

There are different types of kisses you might experience, depending upon the situation. Let’s delve into them and give you some first kiss tips to master every single one. [Read: Kissing chemistry 101 – How to kiss someone for the first time]

1. The introductory kiss

The introductory kiss is the first kiss you’ll ever have, whether your lips are truly, absolutely virginal or you are just about to kiss someone new for the first time.

Don’t let the name fool you. This type of kiss can happen as a greeting, a goodbye, or just a way to gauge your chemistry mid-date. It is a way for you to get a good sense of how the other person kisses and vice versa.

Here’s how to do it:

1. When your partner is moving close to you, lean in and meet them halfway [Read: The giveaway signs your date is ready for that first kiss]

2. Just when you’re both about to close the distance, close your eyes.

3. Tilt your head slowly to one side, right or left. Just make sure your partner is tilting on the opposite side. This prevents your noses from colliding against each other before your lips meet. If you don’t know which way your partner is going to tilt, the best way is to tilt right.

4. Gently touch your lips to your partner’s lips. Make sure your lips are just slightly apart, not *and we mean NEVER* wide open.

5. Apply a little pressure. At this point, when your partner is applying a little pressure, reciprocate with a little pressure too. [Read: 11 signs of a bad kisser and 15 foolproof remedies]

6. Hooray! You’re now kissing!

The French Kiss

This is just kissing, only with the mouth a little more open and with tongue. The rule is, if you’re using your tongue—voila!—you’re frenching.

Once you get the hang of intro kissing, your partner may move into French kissing, which means they are liking what they’re doing and how you’re reciprocating. Good job! [Read: The right way to French kiss – The dos and don’ts]

1. You will probably feel the kiss intensifying, and your partner might tease you with their tongue, or they may be opening their mouth a little bit more.

2. This is the time when you open your mouth a little too, as your partner does.

3. If you’re the one leading, you can initiate the Frenching by gently touching your partner’s tongue with your tongue, and then gently pull it back into your mouth.

4. Don’t stick your tongue into your partner’s mouth without warning, and don’t EVER stick out your tongue in and out of your partner’s mouth. [Confession: My first kiss story and how it went horribly wrong!]

5. Remember to come up for breath every once in a while.

6. Give it a few minutes *or a few intensifying intro kisses* before you go in with the French.

Making out 

So things are really heating up and you find your hands all over your partner’s body—what’s next? The make out kiss. [Read: Passion killers in romance and ways to get past them]

This kiss requires smooth multi-tasking skills. Just in case you are clueless, you are making out when you have your arms around each other, your tongues are really going at it, and you are kissing for longer than 30 seconds at a time.  

We don’t really need to give you instructions on this one, just let your hand wander, listen to your partner, read their reactions, and enjoy it! [Read: Simple peck or steamy makeout? What you can learn from a first kiss]

Forget the pressure and enjoy the moment!

You’ll always be nervous when you have your first kiss ever, or your first kiss with someone you really like, but it’s important to try and enjoy it too. This moment will never come around again – you’re never going to be discovering this new person in this way again, so savor the moment as much as you can.

Remember, they’re probably just as nervous as you!

[Read: 33 awesome date ideas every couple should try]

These top secrets on how to make your first kiss perfect are all you need to enjoy a great first kiss with a special someone. Keep these tips in mind, and use them at the opportune moment.

The post First Kiss Tips: 29 Secrets to Make the First Smooch Sexy & Irresistible is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

30 Sexy Ways to Tease Your Man & Make Him Want to F You Right There

Want to ensure the best night both of you have had in a while? You need to learn how to tease your man. Trust us, it’ll take him from 0-100 in seconds!

You may be under the impression that men like to get right to the point when getting hot and heavy between the sheets. But the truth is that they like a little naughty teasing just as much as girls do! If you want to make it a night to remember, you need to learn how to tease your man to the point of begging!

Some say that the best way to tease a guy is to withhold sex from him, but if you’re doing it for the sake of a “tease,” then there are much better ways that give greater results. In fact, there are tons of reasons to build sexual tension in your relationship!

For one, it gets both parties excited for what’s to come. It also gives you a chance to get creative with your sex life. And most of all, it’s a total thrill to take control of your man and lead the show! [Read: How to make a guy hard – 25 casual and subtle moves no man can resist]

Learning how to tease your boyfriend makes you feel super-powerful!

One of the best feelings as a lover is being able to turn your partner on to the point where they just CAN’T wait any longer. It makes you feel like you’re in total control of their pleasure, and it’s one of the most satisfying and powerful feelings in the world.

Once you learn the secrets behind how to tease your boyfriend, you’ll see how effortless the whole thing can be.

Of course, when it comes to getting it on, foreplay is a vital part of ensuring that everyone walks away fully pleased. Without it, you run the risk of neither of you being able to finish, and that’s just not a good time for anybody. That’s why learning how to tease your man is such a great idea.

Teasing is the best form of foreplay, simply because it creates the most anticipation. The feeling of anticipation can do wonders for turning someone on and making them want you – which is exactly what you want to do during foreplay.

[Read: 17 flirtatiously fun foreplay ideas for women]

How to tease your man and make him crazy for you

Teasing is mostly about doing something seemingly mundane, but with a sexy twist. It’s a promise for later and a way to keep him thinking about you all day.

So whether you’re looking to leave a naughty note in his lunch or go full-on dirty girl at the office, there are plenty of ways to tease your man and leave him hard.

1. Naughty texting, aka sexting

Texting is a great way to get him hot and bothered when you can’t actually be with your man. The most obvious way to get him all riled up is with a nudie pic – but with the dangers of naked sexting, sharing, and internet hacking, this may not be the route for you. Plus, it leaves little to the imagination. Instead of baring it all, tease your man with sensual texts.

Is he working hard? Tell him: “I hope not too hard. I want you to have plenty of energy for what I plan to do with you tonight.”

Want to get a little more to the point? Try something more overt, like: “I got myself all wet thinking about you licking me last night. What should I do now?”

Since you don’t actually have to speak the words, you may find it easier to lose your inhibitions, so go wild and he’ll be desperate to get home! [Read: 25 easy sexy texts to get him all worked up]

2. Teasing him in public

If you’re feeling brave and want to learn how to tease your man, this one is definitely exciting. The next time you’re out at a function or a wedding reception, make sure you give your man a subtle grind on the dance floor. Better yet, the next time you’re out with your friends at a restaurant, simply lean in to his ear when no one’s looking, and whisper “All I want to do right now is wrap my mouth around your c*ck.”

If you’re feeling brave after your brazen tease, reach under the table and give his package a little rubdown. Quickly rejoin the conversation with your friends, so they’ll be none the wiser.

Remember not to get him too riled up during dinner, or you may just end up skipping out on the bill! [Read: 50 dirty things to say to your boyfriend in public]

3. It’s all about your lips

Not those ones! The ones on your face, silly! By all means, ladies, flirt with your lips. When you’re out on a date with your man, make sure you’re making full use of licking your lips and using your tongue to caress your straw. Show him what he’s in for later by drawing his attention to your pouting mouth.

4. Surprise lunch strip show

Everyone loves a pop-in at work from their beloved, right? And he’ll especially love it when a great lunch is paired with some great fondling. Figure out when his lunch break is and show up with his favorite take-out. Let him know that lunch isn’t your only reason for coming.

After his meal, give him your best lap dance as a sexy form of dessert. Make out like you were teenagers, and promise him there’ll be more waiting for him after work. [Read: The girl’s guide to strip clubs and female strippers]

5. Morning shower make out

Want to know how to tease your man? Drive him crazy and catch him just after he gets out of his morning shower, right before he gets his clothes back on. Tell him how much you’re dying to get on your knees – and then do it.

Make him go wild by showing his member some much-needed affection, but don’t give him the full monty just yet.

Suck lightly and focus on licking the head and balls while you stroke him up and down. Remember, he doesn’t get a happy ending until he either A: gets home or B: relents to being super late. [Read: How to give good head – The biggest guide and 50+ blowjob tips and secrets]

6. Have a little taste

For those girls who don’t mind get a little, erm, personal with themselves, then this one is sure to get him hot.

While you’re out in public, have friends over, or are otherwise entertaining, get into a nook of the next room where only he can see you and dip your fingers into your panties, lifting them back up into your mouth, so he can watch you tasting yourself – then give him a playful wink.

Remember, you’ll be fully clothed for this, so you don’t actually have to do the deed. Just let him think you’re being a naughty girl, and you’ll gain the desired effect! [Read: 60 really dirty, seductive things to say to a guy and turn him on]

7. Tell him you’re not wearing any underwear

For some reason, guys love thinking about their lovers and having easy access to them. One way to ensure that you drive your man nuts is to simply tell him that you’re not wearing any underwear. He’ll immediately start picturing you in all sorts of teasing images.

8. Show him you’re not wearing any underwear

If you don’t want to stop the teasing with just telling him you’re going commando, SHOW him. Take a little picture and send it his way.

Or if you’re already with him, grab his hand and let him feel that you’re not lying.

Both of these are perfect ways to tease your boyfriend and drive him crazy to the point where he’s dying for you. He won’t be able to keep his hands off of you after pulling these moves on him. [Read: 30 subtle, obvious and really naughty flirting tips for women]

9. Spend the day walking around in lingerie – but don’t let him touch you

If there’s one thing that gets guys really riled up, it’s putting a show for them and then not letting them touch the goods. That’s how to tease your man!

Get yourself some sexy lingerie, or even use something you have lying around. Then spend the day showing yourself off to him but make it clear he can’t touch… until later. This will drive him mad for you. [Read: 18 physical turn ons that arouse a guy instantly]

10. When leaning in for a peck, hit him with some tongue action and walk away

Unexpected displays of sexuality turn men on in amazing ways. All you have to do when he leans in for your normal, everyday goodbye kiss is to give him a passionate kiss instead.

He’ll be thinking about you all day long.

11. Purchase the toys you talked about and leave them on the bed without saying a word

Maybe you’ve been talking about experimenting with some toys but neither of you have pulled the trigger on it yet. All you have to do to tease him and drive him crazy for you is buy one of those toys – and leave it on the bed for him to find.

Don’t make a peep about it otherwise. This will get him in the mood so fast he won’t know what to do with himself. We suggest doing this in the morning and leaving before he does so he finds it while you’re already gone. [Read: 13 must-have couple’s sex toys for naughty first timers]

12. Tell him all the things you want him to do to you

When he’s least expecting it, whisper in his ear all of the things you want him to do to you. Tell him how badly you want him to work his magic on you, and the images will start going around in his mind. He will go nuts! [Read: How to talk dirty to a guy and sound really, really sexy]

13. Give him a hot oil massage

When it comes to learning how to tease your man, there’s nothing sexier than rubbing hot oil on his body. This is a great way to get him to relax, but also a fantastic way to get him in the mood for later.

When you’re doing this, make your way up and down his entire body, pausing on the good parts, but never quite satisfying him the way he wants. This will make him want you more later. [Read: Massaging your partner to orgasm – 20 pivotal dos and don’ts]

14. Slowly undress him

It may sound strange to undress someone as a means of teasing them, but hear us out. This is the perfect opportunity for you to touch him all over without him being able to stop or control you.

This is also a great time to put some other techniques into play at the same time, to overload his senses.

15. Make him watch you get undressed – slowly

It’s not called a stripTEASE for no reason. If you want to tease your man, sit him down in a chair and make him watch as you slowly take off each article of clothing – saving the best for last. He won’t be able to keep his hands off you when you’re finally naked. [Read: Striptease 101 – Your effortless guide to doing it like a pro]

16. Start kissing him slowly and make your way down his body – but never stopping anywhere

This is the same kind of teasing that the hot oil massage does, only better because it’s with your mouth. Start at his neck and slowly make your way down his chest, then stomach, stopping just above his goods before going back up.

When it comes to learning how to tease your boyfriend, this one is simple yet very effective. [Read: How to kiss him passionately and romantically]

17. Guide his hands along your body

Take his hands and move them over your body just as you want them. Let them linger at the good spots sometimes, but then pull them away and refuse to let him touch others. He’ll be dying to be the one controlling things after a few moments.

18. Guide him slowly into the bedroom

This is a simple, yet very powerful way to tease him. All you have to do is grab his hand and pull him behind you as you slowly, agonizingly, make your way into the bedroom. And then close the door behind him. [Read: How to arouse a man instantly even if he’s just not in the mood]

19. Dress to your best

The things that attract the opposite sex are those things which are unique to you, so make the most of them.

Full hips, large breasts, long legs, narrow waists, and round buttocks are all areas that the male’s sexual attention is focused upon, so whatever your particular physical strengths, make sure you dress to make the most of them. Then just sit back and watch him rise to the occasion!

20. Dirty flirty

Not everyone is an expert at the humble flirt, the art of innocuously inserting innuendo into normal conversation. However, this tease trick is definitely worth learning to get your guy hot under the collar. [Read: 30 subtle, obvious and really sexy flirting tips for girls]

21. The common tongue

The tongue is so suggestive of sex, and you can use it in many different ways to get your guy horny. Licking your lips, the rim of your glass, your fingers… any one of these will have him horny as hell.

Learning how to tease your man doesn’t have to be complicated, most of the time, you already have the tools you need!

22. The quick change

When learning how to tease your boyfriend, some methods need a bit more work than others. This particular method needs some prep, but if he’s picking you up from your place, pretend to have a change of heart over your clothes. Then, do a quick change in front of him to give a little extra glimpse of flesh he wasn’t expecting.

Super tease territory. [Read: How to strip tease – 19 sexy moves for newbies to undress like a stripper]

23. Wear something lacy

One of the most tried and tested ways of getting a guy horny is to adopt a little sexy lingerie for the evening. And this isn’t the sole territory of the bedroom. A revealing glimpse of a stocking top or bra can have a devastating effect. [Read: 34 physical turn ons that arouse a guy instantly]

24. Miss wet t-shirt

Difficult to prepare, but if you’re in a scenario where there is likely to be water being thrown around—a summer party, theme park, water park, etc. — make sure your clothes will be as revealing as possible when wet. This’ll have your guy with his tongue hanging out, meaning you know exactly how to tease your boyfriend!

25. Rock your confidence

If you want to learn how to tease your man, take over the room, girls! A bar, a restaurant, a party, whatever. Let everyone know you’re there and become the center of everyone’s attention. Guys find confidence a very horny trait. [Read: 12 bad girl traits every guy craves to see in his woman]

26. Sit on his lap

If there’s nowhere else convenient to sit, then sit in his lap. Just make sure you execute the odd wiggle to pretend you are getting more comfortable and have the blood rushing to his nether regions at the same time.

27. Phone filth

If your relationship is strong enough, show him some porn on your tablet or phone mid-evening to get his sexual fervor sky-rocketing. He won’t want to wait to get you home! [Read: 15 sexy conversation starters to get you both horny in no time]

28. Let your fingers linger

A woman’s touch alone can be a great tease. However, where you might normally touch the knee or hand, touch his thigh or chest, and let the touch linger.

It’s just about the best subliminal indicator of sexual attraction there is and that’s how to tease your boyfriend.

29. Photo synthesis

Show him some naughty pics of yourself half or fully naked, either before or during the evening, to get his heart thumping and horny as hell. A great teasing tip. [Read: Seductive selfie – 34 best sexy selfie poses and tips to show yourself off]

30. Food can be sexy too

If you’re eating out somewhere, choose your food carefully in order to achieve the greatest naughty tease value.

Bananas, oysters, chocolate mousse, or anything that can be slid sensually and suggestively between your lips. It’s bound to get him as horny as hell. [Read: The best dishes to get your sex drive to skyrocket!]

Beware of blue balls

Pawing, licking, and teasing your man is hot and all, but don’t take it too far! Learning how to tease your boyfriend needs to come with limits. Being super stimulated with no release can result in something men affectionately refer to as “blue balls.”

This is a buildup of pressure and stimulation that can make his testicles swell with varying levels of pain. Teasing is fun, but happy endings are way better!

[Read: Everything you need to know about blue balls]

It’s one thing to be a sexy tease, it’s another to be a cruel one. So learn how to tease your boyfriend in the right way and have him begging for more.

The post 30 Sexy Ways to Tease Your Man & Make Him Want to F You Right There is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Act When You're Caught Red-Handed by a Woman

So, your woman caught you red-handed. What can you do? Cry? Beg? Return fire? Don’t do any of that. Follow this 6-step process instead to handle it with minimal casualties.

Here's a fun topic!

Sooner or later, you're going to do something naughty, and some girl somewhere will catch you.

What should you do?

Should you:

• Beg?
• Cry?
• Plead?
• Fly into a rage?
• Something else dramatic?

No! None of those things.

Instead, you must own it, remain chill, and wait for emotion to subside.

NEW VIDEO: Picking Up Girls in Your Day-to-Day Life, Part 1

For many years guys have asked me, “How do I integrate meeting women into my day-to-day life?”

It’s one of the biggest head-scratchers for guys who’ve been into seduction for a while. Once you’re past that initial hump of basics, where you’re going out often and getting the skill set down, you kind of want to start having approaching women be more a normal part of your life (rather than something you go out expressly to do).

How do you make that transition though? How do you reach the point where you are “on” and able to approach women as you see them throughout the day (and not have it be weird)?

I have at long last gotten around to answering this question – and I did it in customary deep, comprehensive, yet still concrete and tactical form.

Allow me to introduce you to “Picking Up Girls in Your Day-to-Day Life,” a seven-part video series exclusively on GirlsChase.TV.

Part 1, just released today, is here:

(click to watch Part 1)

5 First Date Plans that Lead to Sex

The best first date plans aren’t just getting to know you. They craft a whole experience that starts with small talk and ends as lovers. Choose one of these 5 plans to get there.

The right first date plan doesn’t just help you get to know someone.

4 Smooth Ways to Reframe Her Objections to Casual Sex

When a woman objects that she doesn’t do casual sex or one-night stands, what can you do or say? In fact, there are several things – delivered right, they may completely change her view.

Hey guys and welcome back. Today we are going to discuss technical stuff. I will share some simple techniques that are relatively easy to pull off yet very efficient.

These techniques counter a certain form of resistance you may have faced: resistance to having sex the first night, spontaneous, casual sex, and one-night stands. You are opting for a same night/day lay, and she resists.

If this sounds familiar, the techniques I will share today will benefit you.

Perhaps you are having a conversation about sex, and she mentions that she is into casual sex or needs sex with feelings (all sex involves feelings, but she is really saying “sex with significant and romantic feelings). I do not consider this resistance because you are not escalating the vibe. She is just trying to set her own frame or test yours.

Nevertheless, these techniques, or “reframes” will help. You are welcome to use the exact reframe language I share, but you may also try variations or make up your own. This is why I try to explain the mechanism of the technique.

Keeping Secrets in a Relationship: 42 Must-Know Rules & Exceptions

Do you think that keeping secrets in a relationship is acceptable or not? We all have our small secrets that nobody else knows but should you share all?

Countless magazines tell you that you shouldn’t keep any secrets in a relationship. Hell, even we’ve said it. And to some extent, it’s true. You should be able to talk openly and honestly with your partner about anything, but are there some secrets you’re allowed to keep in a relationship? We would have to say ‘yes.’

For example, do you really need to tell your partner how many people you’ve slept with? No, you don’t. Some secrets can be extremely hurtful. Not only can they be considered lies, but they lead to resentment, paranoia, and unhappiness.

The more secrets you keep, the more likely it is that you’ll become a blatant liar. The things that aren’t typical to most people might be normal to you. It’s a little unnerving, but it does happen. So, is it worth it to hide a secret from your partner? [Read: 13 giveaways to tell if someone is lying to your face]

Why do we keep secrets from our significant others?

Saying, “If a person really loved you, they’d accept you for the things you did” is not that reassuring. We want to be loved the way we are right now, not because of our past and the things we’ve done. The secrets we keep are those that we think could damage our relationships or leave us open to judgment that we aren’t prepared for.

Our insecurities and beliefs keep us from revealing some of the things that we’re ashamed of. Knowing that most people don’t react well to some secrets can make us think twice about telling people about it.

Sometimes, we hear people react negatively to other people’s circumstances. If we are experiencing the same things, our observations tell us that revealing the same secrets can make us vulnerable to that type of judgment as well. [Read: The checklist to follow for a happy romance]

Can a secret stay secret?

Most secrets don’t stay secret for very long, especially if someone else knows about it. The problem occurs when those secrets get out, and the person on the receiving end hasn’t had time to process said information.

It’s true that you need to be open about everything in order to move forward in your relationships, but some people need more time to process the information that they want to reveal. Apart from that, your partner needs to be ready to accept the things that you want to reveal to them.

You need to get to know your partner better and see if they are the type of person who won’t judge you for the things that you have no control over.

You can’t control how they will react, but you can at least build enough trust to be comfortable about telling them your secrets… eventually. [Read: 8 taboo topics you need to avoid in a new relationship]

Is keeping secrets in a relationship worth it?

There is no harm in hiding one or two secrets from your partner, but when you lie often, it may genuinely hurt your health. People who lie often may have heartburn, panic attacks, and sleeplessness due to feelings of guilt and worry. Why do you hide secrets from your partner, anyway?

How big is your mistake that you want to cover it up with lies just to save your relationship? No matter how big or small your faults may be, keeping it a secret should never be an option, especially if you genuinely love your partner.

It’s okay if what you’re keeping from your partner is considered a white lie but if it’s something big and significantly affects your relationship, it’s just not worth it.

You’ll end up overwhelmed with guilt and shame. Not to mention, you’ll sabotage your relationship as a whole by keeping secrets. [Read: Lying in a relationship: 15 steps to confront a lie & heal the love]

The exceptions for keeping secrets in a relationship

While keeping secrets is never a good thing, there are particular exceptions when it’s okay. There are a few unspoken agreements where keeping secrets won’t cause the fall out of your relationship.

1. A surprise

We bet everyone loves surprises, especially when it’s a beautiful occasion you want to remember forever. Are you throwing a party or investing in an expensive gift? Then a secret is a-okay. Buying your partner jewelry, recreating your first date, planning a fun getaway are all good secrets in a relationship.

That is if your partner loves surprises. Keeping secrets in a relationship and hiding a surprise present for your lover is entirely different. So, no need to worry about keeping it a secret. [Read: How to express your gratitude to someone you love]

2. A proposal

Asking her to be your girlfriend? Asking him to move in? Or are you proposing marriage? All of these are often secrets for a while. But what makes them suitable is that there is a plan for the secret to being exposed. And in most cases, the mystery leads to good news, not bad.

If you want to make this event memorable for you and your partner, put in all your efforts and ideas and observe their reaction. Keeping secrets in a relationship isn’t always bad if your intentions are pure, like proposing to your partner. [Read: How to pull off a memorable proposal]

3. What you talk to your friends about

Guys and girls alike have conversations with their friends that often do not need to get back to their partners. It isn’t that this knowledge would cause a fight, but just as you and your partner have privacy from others, you and your friends deserve that too.

Yes, keeping secrets in a relationship may be harmful. While this is true for most conversations with your friends, there are few exceptions, particularly regarding topics reserved for female discussion.

You may complain about your husband’s snoring habits to your girlfriend or your brother about your girlfriend’s movie-watching habits. These things might be irritating in a relationship, but they are so minor that venting to a close friend can help. [Read: What to talk about with friends and ask the questions most ignore]

4. How do you feel about their family

This one can be touchy. You do not have to share your feelings about your in-laws with your partner. If it becomes severe and needs to change, by all means, talk. But if you don’t like your boyfriend’s mom’s cooking or her need to organize your cupboards, you can probably put up with that during a visit.

However, if your mother-in-law insists on moving in, contacting you often, or asking about your sex life, you should speak to her. But holding your mouth for minor issues may help. If you get to know someone well, the good may outweigh the negative.

Keeping secrets in a relationship, like how you feel about your partner’s family, is still up to you. Sit down with your partner and speak about it when the time is right. [Read: 18 signs it’s time and ways to prepare your partner to meet the parents]

5. External secrets

Your partner does not need to know about your buddies’ pacts or secrets. Just as you and your spouse have secrets, it’s pointless to share topics unrelated to your relationship.

One of the most incredible things about keeping secrets in a relationship is that certain things aren’t worth talking about or worrying about.

Your lover does not need to know if your closest buddy confided in you about anything serious. Sharing your life does not obligate you to disclose everything. [Read: The 9 unspoken rules all couples need to follow]

6. You have an innocent little crush

Even if you’re in a relationship, you may enjoy seeing your neighbor jog past or talking about mid-20th century fiction with the gorgeous young clerk at the bookshop.

We all have these hidden desires, and they’re harmless—unless they begin to dominate your thoughts or emotions, threatening your mutual trust. In other words, keeping secrets in a relationship, like having a crush on someone, is acceptable as long as you don’t act on it.

7. That one embarrassing moment from your past

Everyone has done something they’d want to forget, whether it was a disastrous romance, an unfulfilling career path in which they failed horribly, or even the time they sang lead in a dreadful Go-tribute Go’s band.

Keeping secrets in a relationship like this should not always be wrong. Those memories are yours to share or not. As long as there was no lingering trauma, you got over it, and your present partner will never know about it. [Read: 15 painfully embarrassing things that happen during sex]

8. You think one of their friends is hot

It’s alright to be attracted to one of their close friends. That is if you never intend to act on your attraction. If you do, that’s a distinct matter and should be addressed.

Just because you’re attracted to one of their friends isn’t a huge problem. Plus, telling your partner you think their friend is hot is a red flag. Don’t even think about keeping secrets in a relationship if you’re this insensitive. [Read: What is cheating in a relationship? The truth most people ignore]

9. You weren’t initially attracted to them

Getting to know someone builds attraction. Mentioning that you were gradually drawn to your present partner is neither humorous nor beneficial to them. This information is outdated and harmful. You are with them now for a purpose, so don’t mention the growing attraction.

10. You’ve had better sex

You may have had better sex but this isn’t something you need to share. Plus, the sex with your past partner may have been amazing, but you lacked the connection you have with your new partner.

The point is, your partner doesn’t need to know they’re second or third best. This isn’t going to make them feel good about themselves, nor will it make your relationship stronger. [Read: 15 things to talk about in a perfect relationship]

11. How many sexual encounters you’ve had

Listen, whether you’ve slept with two people or 200, no one needs to know this except for you. Of course, when it comes to STIs, you should tell them. This is something that could affect their own personal health.

But other than that, if you’re in a committed relationship with your partner, there’s no need to exchange the numbers of people you’ve slept with. The number doesn’t change anything. [Read: How to talk about your past sexual experiences with your current partner]

12. A characteristic you don’t like that they can’t change 

If you don’t like a core characteristic they have, well, what are you going to do? Tell them that they don’t like something that they can’t change? And then what? Now, if you’re concerned about their weight, for example, these are things that can change but have to be encouraged positively.

Your partner is going to have quirks that you may not like, but that’s also why you love them. [Read: Are you being selfish in your relationship?]

13. How you spend your money 

If you’re married to your partner and share expenses, naturally, how you handle your money may differ in some aspects depending on how you arrange it. You don’t need to explain every daily purchase you make throughout the day. This only adds anxiety and stress to a relationship.

But if you’re in debt, you should let them know.

14. You like specific things about your ex better than them 

Listen, there are qualities that our exes had that our current partners may not have. Every person is different. You’re with your current partner for different reasons.

But you don’t need to share qualities that you miss from your ex with your current partner. How do you think this would make them feel? [Read: How to stop comparing your new partner with your ex]

15. They need to lose weight

Sure, you wish your partner had a super flat and sexy stomach, we all do, but this isn’t something you need to share. You’re with your partner for a reason.

If the only thing bothering you is their body, well, maybe you need to find someone else because you don’t deserve them.

16. Lingering feelings for your ex

Oh god, this isn’t something you should do. In fact, this will only bring on insecurities in your partner. You don’t want that. Your ex may always have a place in your heart, but you don’t need to share this with your current partner.

If you’re unsure of what to do and unsure about your feelings, take some time and sort them out on your own. [Read: 10 clear signs your past relationship is holding you back in life]

17. Negative things your friends and family say about them 

If you repeat what your family or friends tell you about them, the next time you have a family dinner, they’re not going to come.

Negative reactions can be hurtful and hard to recover from. Once you tell them, the odds are they will distance themselves from your family and friends. [Read: Scenarios where white lies is your savior in love]

18. Psychological disorders

When people jokingly say you’re crazy, all you can do is smile and sip on your cup of coffee. Although this is something that should be discussed early on in the relationship, the stigma of having a diagnosed mental disorder still keeps people from admitting the truth.

For sure, it’s something you should discuss because you shouldn’t have to keep this secret, but you should share it when you’re ready and not before. [Read: Why we need to break down the stigma of mental illness]

19. Gross habits you can’t stop doing

Oh, you know what those are. Picking on an ingrown hair, squeezing a blackhead, drinking out of the milk carton – the list goes on. But it’s so hard to stop!

20. How you really feel about the things they like 

Yes, that shirt looks so cool. I love football! This leather recliner in your basement in the middle of summer is so comfy! Lies, lies, lies!

It’s okay to keep your feelings inside for a while, because otherwise, you may end up pushing the other person away or hurting their feelings. [Read: 25 hobbies for couples that want to have more fun together]

21. Family problems and what your friends are really like 

We’ve lived with our family since the day we were born. We know how it feels, so we’re not sure whether or not a significant other will want to join in on the crazy.

The same goes for friends; you love them to death, but they make you want to scream sometimes. Some of the things they do are not fit for public consumption, let alone your partner’s.

22. How often you’ve slept with people on the first date 

“I don’t usually do this on the first date.” Yeah, right.

The bottom line is it’s your business and nobody else’s. Opening up about this leaves you prone to being judged and you don’t deserve that. [Read: Is it alright to have sex on the first date?]

23. When you want to get married

Honestly, any date that’s available in June is good for most of us women. For the men, it’s more of a question of if they want to marry. Okay, that’s a generalization, but if you’re too forward about your plans for the future, you might just scare them off.

24. Your blocked contacts list 

If they ever saw it, there would be so many questions! So many questions that we don’t have half the answers to. [Read: The happy couple’s guide to social media etiquette]

25. What you looked like in high school and how you were

 No matter how good we looked, it was still in high school. It’s like your mom showing you how hot she looked wearing hot pink leg warmers and shoulder pads in her sweaters.

What we looked like doesn’t matter as much as who we were. If we were mean, that info’s going in the vault. If we were losers, that info’s going in there, too. Similarly, admitting who we dated in high school just leaves room for us to explain what happened when we were dating said people.

High school romances are not for the faint of heart. [Read: How to talk about your past relationships the right way]

26. Credit reports

When your partner realizes that they’re dating a shopaholic or someone on the IRS watchlist, that June wedding probably won’t materialize anytime soon.

As we mentioned earlier, you should probably talk about debt if it’s a real issue and things get serious, but at the start, you can keep your credit report to yourself.

27. The really serious stuff

Abortions, abusive ex-partners, traumatic experiences, etc. What matters is that some people need time to resolve themselves to opening up about these things with their partner in the present. [Read: Should you ever confess to cheating on your partner?]

No matter what your secret is, just know that you should always be honest with yourself. Keeping things to yourself is okay, only if it’s not going to bite you on the ass one day. The secret that you’re keeping shouldn’t cause anyone harm, as well.

An example would be keeping an abusive relationship with your family from your significant other. A secret like getting your upper lips waxed is no big deal.

But if you’re harboring a secret that could possibly affect your relationship, you should think twice about hiding it or discussing it honestly with your partner. [Read: Things you need to eventually talk to your partner about to be happy]

Common relationship situations and whether to speak up or keep quiet

There are guidelines for keeping secrets in a relationship. To avoid problems, stick to these golden rules.

1. Your ex reached out

We’re sure you’ve fought this before. When your partner noticed an ex’s text on your phone, chaos ensued. It wouldn’t have been a problem if you simply said your ex texted you about returning their iPod. There is always a rationale for keeping anything like this hidden.

Why keep it hidden if your partner has no reason to be angry? Your partner trusts you, so give them what they deserve by not keeping secrets in a relationship that could harm you both. [Read: How to respond to a text from your ex]

2. An inappropriate encounter

The same goes for this. Whether your boss hit on you, a coworker made a pass, or a friend crossed the line, you should tell your partner. If it made you uncomfortable, this is the person you should be able to trust and lean on.

Remember that you got into a relationship not only because of pure love, but you believe that your partner can be worthy of your trust.

No matter what happens, if you’re thinking about keeping secrets in a relationship, let your spouse know that there is someone out there who could be interested. Sharing this and discussing your role in the relationship can help you grow closer. [Read: Are you unintentionally micro-cheating?]

3. You got a job offer

Yes, that’s great! You got a job offer and want to think it over before telling your partner. If you aren’t taking it, why bother worrying about them in the first place? Well, you are in a relationship and should make big decisions together.

Getting a job offer isn’t something to hide from your partner. They would be even more glad if you were open to them about your career. If you tell your partner big news like this after the fact, they will feel betrayed. Like you didn’t want their input or bother to include them at all. [Read: Love or career? How to make the right choice]

4. You want to buy a house

Buying your partner’s home, condo, or anything else significant like that can be romantic to some. However, it can seem controlling and intense to others. Decisions like this are best made together.

So you have to think hard about this decision if you don’t want to ruin your relationship with your partner by keeping secrets. Although extravagant gifts can be lovely, think before you buy.

5. You want to quit your job

Just like getting a new career, leaving one may do a lot of harm if you’re planning on keeping secrets in a relationship.

Changing careers or abandoning one without a backup is another choice you should discuss with your partner, whether you like it or not. Not telling your partner about this is unfair. [Read: The need for purpose in life – 5 things it can do for you]

6. You’re spending a large amount of money

Buying anything above a certain amount has to be discussed in a serious relationship where you share money. Keeping secrets in a relationship is challenging, especially if it’s about spending a lot of money on something your partner won’t like.

Even if you don’t like what they say, talking about it demonstrates that you value their opinion. [Read: How to stop fighting over money in your relationship]

7. You cheated

This is one of the most serious problems when it comes to relationships. Some don’t like talking about it at all because it’s disturbing and might hurt their partner. Then some believe that secrets can never affect them. Regrettably, we disagree.

It’s likely you already know but are in denial that your boyfriend cheated on you. That’s a coward’s excuse. You wouldn’t have cheated if you didn’t intend to hurt your spouse. The easiest approach to address it is to admit you made a mistake and apologize.

In such a case, the possibilities of regaining trust are limited to none. [Read: What is cheating in a relationship? The truth most people ignore]

8. You’re bored

Being bored in a relationship might sound ordinary. We all go through ruts. But if you are feeling unfulfilled by your relationship, you need to talk about it. Keeping that to yourself can lead to cheating, resentment, and a blowout.

Instead, tell your partner you feel like your relationship lacks that spark.

That way, you can work on it together. You can plan fun dates, go on mini-vacations, or couples counseling. If you want to have an everlasting commitment with your partner, start by not keeping secrets in a relationship and always talking about whatever that’s bothering you. [Read: 34 honest reasons why couples get bored with their relationship]

9. What you want in the future

A lot of long-term relationships can get thrown off track by both partners concealing their plans for the future. You could be with someone for years and keep it a secret that you don’t want kids or that you want to travel the world. These things don’t need to be spilled right off the bat.

Once you see a future together, you should discuss the future. If your dreams don’t line up, and you’re both unwilling to concede, it won’t work out. Did you know that the greatest battles in a relationship are won when two partners work together as a team?

That whatever obstacles they may face, they know they’ll overcome them with trust and confidence. We just hope that every couple in this world has this positive mindset.  [Read: The best questions to be asking in your relationship]

10. What you expect from them

This is a biggie. So many people expect their partners to know what they want and expect from them without them ever having to say it.

Sharing what you want from your partner makes your relationship so much stronger. Your partner has to know what you expect from them, from helping with household chores to weekly date nights.

Do you want them to attend your parents’ wedding anniversary? Or maybe do a little shopping on the weekend? Always keep in mind that little things matter and can impact your relationship.

11. Your minor relationship doubts

If you’re experiencing these feelings first, don’t feel obligated to share these secrets in your relationship. Sharing these first views can only induce uneasiness and wounded sentiments. Only communicate your emotions with your partner if they persist and get stronger. [Read: Relationship doubts – How to recognize them and make the right decision]

12. You’re in debt

If you live with your partner or have joint finances, they need to know how much you owe. Don’t hide your debt.

Don’t hide it, and don’t make excuses. Expect honesty in return. It’s better to know up front whether your debt is a deal-breaker for your partner.

13. You don’t think they’re making an effort

Many believe that their partner isn’t doing their part, but they choose to keep it to themselves. It’s essential to speak out when someone isn’t doing their fair share of the emotional and financial work in a relationship.

Generally, most couples avoid discussing responsibility because they believe it’s trivial. But it’s best to address these concerns as soon as possible since they may quickly turn into a source of resentment. [Read: 20 relationship problems that push a couple apart or bring them closer]

14. You’re having mental health issues

All of us experience highs and lows in our lives. Talking about it with your partner may not even be the ideal option since you don’t want to burden them with the emotional weight.

This is fair for some couples, but it should not be an exception for others, especially regarding things like your mental health. It is difficult and perhaps hazardous to be mentally ill. Our relationships with others are likewise affected by this.

15. You were married or engaged before

Because some people don’t believe it’s necessary, it’s on our list of secrets that need to be revealed.

Indeed, the past shouldn’t influence how your relationship works in the present, but for financial and emotional reasons, previous love commitments should be made clear to your partner. [Read: 10 reasons why divorce can be such a damn good thing]

Keeping secrets in a relationship WON’T keep you safe

As we’ve come to understand, it takes courage to be open and honest about every aspect of your life. Some people feel that to survive in a relationship, and they must conceal secrets or tell lies.

However, the most excellent way to build a long-lasting relationship based on mutual trust is to discover healthy ways of communicating your true feelings to your partner.

[Read: 19 rules to be a good partner in a relationship and make them feel lucky]

Keeping secrets in a relationship can be a bumpy road. How do you know when a secret is acceptable and when it’s a red flag? If you’re hesitant, keep in mind that honesty is always the best policy.

The post Keeping Secrets in a Relationship: 42 Must-Know Rules & Exceptions is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.