Why Do White Knights Think Girls Don't Want Sex?

An irate reader accuses me of being a bad man leading conservative girls astray. I ask why white knights like this think girls don’t want sex?

I wrote an article on picking up shy, conservative girls who don’t go out, after guys have been requesting I write this for some time now. As I expected, it triggered some angry white knighting. A reader commenting on the article called me (in essence) a bad man and implied that I am using treachery to beguile poor, unsuspecting damsels into the sack, where I rob them of their innocence (and, presumably?, ruin them for their actual good conservative husbands who will come after me).

I’ll post his comment in full:

Considering that most girls sleep with two or less men in their lives, and conservative girls are in that subset, picking them up is usually unethical.
These women are looking to be with a single man, and being inexperienced they aren't terribly resistant to someone attractive who knows what they're doing.

"First, if you are a conservative man who thinks conservative girls are angels and no man should ever talk of picking them up and despoiling them, cool your heels. The guys I’ve had requesting this article are all guys who want to date these girls as girlfriends, ***or even*** take them as wives."

This last sentence comes from your worldview when it comes to commitment. Wanting to date these girls as girlfriends, where you interact with them for a few years then dump them, is atrocious. These are people who want to find someone to settle down with forever, often also wanting that person to be their only partner, and here you seem to think that 'giving' them a few years of 'commitment' - where there is no intention of marriage from the beginning! - is ... honorable or something.
"Or even wives!" Is worse, as though that's some extreme scenario. That's the baseline expectation for these women when getting into these relationships, and only an apparently extreme subset of the readership looking to sleep with them have the same expectations.

Men looking to marry conservative women might need help, but you're the wrong person to do it.
Men looking to use a conservative girl for months or years and then dump her, are not good people and should not be helped.

(Morally, men who are dealing with virgin conservative women should generally not sleep with them unless they want to marry them. It is hurting them and betraying their expectations. )

Aside from jumping to a bunch of wild conclusions that require some pretty egregious leaps of faith (that: conservative girls universally want to settle down ASAP with the first guy they get with; that conservative girls ‘only ever want one partner’; that I consider marriage an ‘extreme scenario’ [lol?]; that men who want to date conservative girls are “looking to use them for months or years then dump them”; that we said anything at all about sleeping with virgins), the comment itself regards women as these helpless waifs; regards charming men as predators; and regards men like this commenter the poor waifs’ gallant protectors.

I’ll discuss most of these points briefly, but only briefly, as they’re all points I have covered before already.

Beyond that, though, I want to answer a question that arises from this reader’s screed: is it possible to trick women into sex who absolutely DO NOT WANT to have sex with you at all?

Picking Up Girls from Bars that Close Late: Additional Considerations

More considerations to help you pull off your late-closing nightclub pulls. How do you maintain state? How crucial is endurance game? Can you use public transport? And more…

Hey guys and welcome back.

Table of Contents

1. Bold Game?

2. Endurance

   • A. State Control

   • B. Endurance Game

3. Sealing the Deal

   • A. Public Transportation

   • B. The Clock Block

4. Conclusion and Parting Words

Two weeks ago, I discussed how to deal with early closing hours (venues closing at around 3 a.m. or earlier), and last week, I covered late closing hours (venues closing at 5 a.m. or later). The dynamics in both settings differ, and so do your strategic options. You have less time to strategize in venues that close early and must be bolder to screen out unreceptive girls quickly.

In late closing venues, you have plenty of time to deal with those, and you can run efficient strategies that require more time, like extended verbal game or social proof game.

I also reviewed differences in venue dynamics:

• With earlier closing times, the venue dynamic works for you by providing a peak hour that usually affects people’s state positively. However, these venues offer more wildcards, which are typically negative. A defined closing time gives you plausible deniability to extract the girl from the venue.

• With later closing hours, you have a calmer and more settled vibe, and your results depend more on your work. You will be more in control but will get less for free.

Below, I will discuss the remaining logistical factors to consider with state control, sealing the deal, and providing pointers regarding your strategic choices in venues with later closing hours.

This post continues my post on late closing hours, although those who want to know more about early closing hours may still find some valuable details here. If the venues close late where you live, then this expansion post is for you.

45 Sweet Romantic Quotes for Her & Secrets to Make a Girl Melt with Words

Want to find the perfect romantic quote to express the love you feel for your girl? Read on for the most heart-throbbing quotes to make her swoon.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but sometimes just a few words can paint a thousand pictures—especially when it comes to romantic quotes for her.

This feature is your ultimate guide to discovering a curated collection of romantic quotes that will not just make her day but elevate her to the queenly status she so richly deserves.

Choosing the right words isn’t just poetic license; it’s a science-backed way to deepen your emotional connection. So, if you need to find that special little something to say to the lady in your life but just can’t quite seem to find the words yourself, you could do a lot worse than to look down our list of the most romantic quotes to make her heart melt.

[Read: The best (200+) flirty texts and sweet messages to make her smile]

The Neuroscience of Love and Words

Before we swoon you with our romantic quotes for her, let’s take a quick detour into the fascinating world of neuroscience.

Why? Because understanding the science behind love and words can make those quotes even more impactful.

1. The oxytocin connection

When you deliver one of these romantic quotes for her, you’re not just speaking to her ears; you’re speaking directly to her brain, triggering the release of oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone.”

Oxytocin is released during moments of closeness and emotional connection, helping to strengthen the bonds of love.

So, when you pick the perfect quote, you’re essentially giving her brain a love bath! [Read: Chemistry of love – how hormones make you feel love the way you do]

2. Mirror neurons

Now, let’s talk about mirror neurons, the unsung heroes of empathy and understanding. These special neurons fire not just when we perform an action, but also when we observe that action in others.

So, when she hears a romantic quote from you, her mirror neurons kick in, helping her to feel the emotion behind your words. It’s like her brain is saying, “Oh, I get what you’re feeling!”

Yes, there’s science to back up the ‘aww’ factor, making those romantic quotes for her all the more magical.

The Best Thoughful Quotes to Make Her Smile

Now that you’re equipped with a bit of neuroscience know-how, let’s dive into the good stuff—romantic quotes for her designed to make her smile from ear to ear.

1. “Love is being stupid together.” – Paul Valéry

2. “If I know what love is, it’s because of you.” – Herman Hesse

3. “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Elizabeth Evans

4. “I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile.” – Unknown

5. “We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love.” – Dr. Seuss

6. “You make me want to be a better man.” – Melvin Udall, “As Good as It Gets“

7. “To love is to burn, to be on fire.” – Jane Austen, made light-hearted by countless romantic comedies.

8. “Love is an endless mystery, for it has nothing else to explain it.” – Rabindranath Tagore

9. “If I had a flower for every time I thought of you… I could walk through my garden forever.” – Alfred Tennyson

10. “I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.” – Roy Croft

11. “Your words are my food, your breath is my wine. You are everything to me.” – Sarah Bernhardt

12. “You are the butter to my bread, and the breath to my life.” – Julia Child

13. “In case you ever foolishly forget; I am never not thinking of you.” – Virginia Woolf

14. “You don’t marry someone you can live with—you marry someone you cannot live without.” – Unknown

15. “The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” – Audrey Hepburn

Tips: How to Effectively Use These Quotes

Timing: A well-timed quote can make a simple moment unforgettable. Use them to punctuate a regular day with a touch of romance.

Delivery: Make eye contact, let the words marinate, and deliver them with a warm smile. [Read: Step-by-step eye contact flirting tips moves to catch someone’s eyes ASAP]

Context: While these quotes are more versatile, align them with what you’re doing or talking about for that extra sprinkle of thoughtfulness.

The Best Romantic Quotes for a Deep Emotional Connection

So, we’ve had our laughs and smiles, but now let’s move to the kind of romantic quotes for her that forge a lasting emotional connection. These aren’t just words; they’re tiny keys that unlock the deeper chambers of the heart.

1. “You put your arms around me, and I’m home.” – Unknown

2. “You are my sun, my moon, and all my stars.” – E.E. Cummings

3. “When I say I love you more, I don’t mean I love you more than you love me. I mean I love you more than the bad days ahead of us.” – Unknown

4. “I would rather spend one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

5. “You are my today and all of my tomorrows.” – Leo Christopher

6. “The scariest thing about distance is you don’t know if they’ll miss you or forget about you.” – Nicholas Sparks

7. “The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” – Morrie Schwartz

8. “You know it’s love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you’re not part of their happiness.” – Julia Roberts

9. “Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself.” – Andre Breton

10. “You make everything feel like it’s worth it.” – Unknown

11. “It’s so easy to fall in love but hard to find someone who will catch you.” – S. Grand

12. “The love we give away is the only love we keep.” – Elbert Hubbard

13. “Sometimes I can’t see myself when I’m with you. I can only just see you.” – Jodi Lynn Anderson

14. “You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a song only you can hear.” – Oscar Wilde

15. “I still haven’t figured out how to sit across from you and not be madly in love with everything you do.” – William C. Hannan

Tips: Importance of Genuine Emotion Behind the Words

Genuine emotion: Saying “I love you” is powerful, but only if it comes from the heart. Authenticity amplifies impact.

Visual Elements: Combine the quote with a memorable photo of the two of you. A picture is worth a thousand words, but a picture with words? That’s a mini love-novel right there.

Consistency: A well-timed quote can leave an indelible impression, but ongoing emotional availability is what really nurtures a deep connection. [Read: Husband material – 31 signs to split a boyfriend you date and a man you marry]

The Best Quotes for Rekindling the Flame

Ready to get those embers glowing again? These romantic quotes for her are here to add some much-needed fuel to the fire, reminding both of you why you fell in love in the first place.

1. “I crave a love so deep, the ocean would be jealous.” – Unknown

2. “I didn’t want to fall in love, not at all. But at some point, you smiled, and I blew it.” – Unknown

3. “You are the risk I’ll always take.” – Unknown

4. “In a sea of people, my eyes will always search for you.” – Unknown

5. “You give me the kind of feelings people write novels about.” – Unknown

6. “Let’s commit the perfect crime. I’ll steal your heart, and you steal mine.” – Unknown

7. “I fell in love with the way you touched me without using your hands.” – Unknown

8. “You are the poem I never knew how to write, and this life is the story I’ve always wanted to tell.” – Tyler Knott Gregson

9. “I look at you and see the rest of my life in front of my eyes.” – Unknown

10. “You and me? It’s a forever kind of thing.” – Unknown

11. “To be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dreamed.” – Valerie Lombardo

12. “You lit a fire in me that I’ve been searching for my whole life.” – Unknown

13. “You make my dopamine levels go all silly.” – Unknown

14. “With you, I’m a beautiful mess. It’s like catching lightning, the chances of finding someone like you.” – Unknown

15. “Your hand touching mine. This is how galaxies collide.” – Sanober Khan

Tips: Implementing these Quotes

Be spontaneous: A random passionate quote during a date night can work wonders. Unexpectedness adds to the excitement. [Read: Spontaneous sex – 19 impulsive ways to do it, why have it, and things to avoid]

Personalize it: Whisper it in her ear, text it in the middle of the day, or write it in a note and tuck it into her purse. The medium can add layers to the message.

Name dropping: Simple, but powerful. Insert her name into the quote. It’s like coding in an Easter egg just for her.

The Must-Knows on Tweaking these Romantic Quotes for Her

So you’ve picked a quote that tugs at your heartstrings. Great! Now, how do you make it uniquely yours?

1. Voice notes

Take it to the 21st century and send her a voice note of you saying the quote. The sound of your voice adds a deeply personal layer.

2. Handwritten love

If voice notes aren’t your thing, then go to the complete opposite end of the spectrum! In our digital age, a handwritten note is almost like a relic of love. Write down the quote and leave it somewhere she’ll find it. This old-school touch can have a modern-day impact.

[Read: 20 romantic secrets and examples to write a love letter and melt their heart]

Now, let’s get a bit geeky. According to self-determination theory, one of the key elements to feeling loved and connected is “autonomy,” the sense that you’re a willing participant in your love story. Personalizing a quote can amplify this feeling.

When a quote is tweaked to fit your unique relationship, it becomes a custom-made expression of love. This caters to her psychological need for autonomy, as it signals a love that is conscious, chosen, and individualized.

Their Beauty Lies in How You Frame Them in Your Heart

Before you go off wielding your newfound arsenal of romantic quotes for her, remember this: Words in love are like colors in a sunset; they fade and transform, but their beauty lies in how you frame them in your heart.

[Read: 67 sweet yet small romantic gestures that show love in the biggest way]

May your words be ever as enchanting as your love, and may these romantic quotes for her serve as your poetic paintbrush in this masterpiece called “relationship.”

The post 45 Sweet Romantic Quotes for Her & Secrets to Make a Girl Melt with Words is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

31 Good, Bad & Truths Every Girl MUST Know about Having a Guy Best Friend

You might think that having a guy best friend is useful, but are there any downsides? Sometimes a guy best friend can play havoc with your love life. 

If you have a guy best friend, you might have some questions you want answered. Can men and women ever be just friends, or is romantic tension an inevitable pitfall? Or do we all have to live out the ‘When Harry Met Sally’ prophecy that states that men and women can never be platonic buddies without some kind of romantic tension?

There’s no shortage of stereotypes when it comes to guy-girl friendships, right? You’ve got the ‘friend zone‘—a sort of romantic purgatory—and the ‘backup boyfriend‘—the one you might marry at 40 if neither of you finds anyone else.

Oh, and let’s not forget the third category: ‘But don’t you guys like-like each other?’

We’re setting out to dissect these clichés, cut through the awkwardness, and give you the straight facts to uncover the intricate psychology that governs the pros, cons, and ‘can we, can’t we’ debates surrounding having a guy best friend.

[Read: Opposite sex friendships – 24 rules, boundaries, and where we go wrong]

The Perks of Having a Guy Best Friend

So, you’ve got a guy best friend, and people keep giving you the side-eye. ‘What’s the deal with you two?’ they ask you, as if your friendship were a problem in a calculus class.

Well, little do they know that having a male best friend is like having a secret superpower. And guess what? It’s scientifically proven!

Allow us to shed some light on the true perks of such a friendship:

1. Different perspectives

Ever tried explaining the plot of a rom-com to a guy? Or the adrenaline of a sports game to a woman? The reactions are—let’s say—mixed.

This isn’t just social conditioning; it’s partially biological. The cognitive differences between men and women have been studied at length by psychologists like Carol Gilligan and John Gray.

When you have a guy best friend, you gain access to a fresh viewpoint that can offer you insights you might never have considered.

2. Straight talk

Picture this: you’re venting about a terrible day at work. Your female best friend is likely to sympathize and say, “I can’t believe they treated you like that!” Your guy best friend? He’s more likely to ask, “So, what are you going to do about it?”

Men often lean toward problem-solving, thanks to what psychologists refer to as the “theory of mind.” While a good cry is sometimes needed, having someone to give you a nudge toward finding a solution can be a game-changer. [Read: 20 lifestyle changes to make in your 20s for a better life]

3. Broadening social circles

You know the feeling—you walk into a party, and it’s like you’ve stepped into a parallel universe where everyone belongs to cliques as impenetrable as Fort Knox. Having friends from different genders can be your golden ticket in.

According to social penetration theory, varied social experiences lead to richer, more diverse social circles. So, not only does your guy best friend offer a different type of companionship, but he also opens doors to social worlds you might not have accessed otherwise.

4. The decoder of dude-speak

We’ve all been there, right? You get a text from a guy you’re interested in, and it’s just a smiley face. A smiley face! What does that even mean? [Read: 48 rules and texting etiquette for guys and girls in the early stages of dating]

Enter your guy best friend, the Rosetta Stone of male behavior. He can offer invaluable insights into the labyrinthine ways of dude-speak, making him a lifesaver when it comes to interpreting mixed signals.

5. The Matchmaker *No, Not the Tinder Kind*

Let’s be real; dating apps can be as unnerving as assembling IKEA furniture—confusing, endless, and you’re never quite sure what you’ll end up with. Your guy best friend offers an alternative: real-life, quality, pre-screened people who you might not have met otherwise.

Mutual introductions can lead to less awkward first dates and potentially even a meaningful connection. How’s that for efficiency?

6. Your go-to plus-one

Weddings, office parties, social gatherings—there’s always that one event where you’d rather eat dirt than go alone. Your guy best friend is your forever reliable plus-one.

This can actually enhance your social standing. Research shows that people who engage in cross-sex friendships are often perceived as more socially skilled.

7. Your drama-free zone

While emotional discussions have their place, sometimes you just want to hang out without dissecting every little feeling.

Having a guy best friend often means fewer emotional roller coasters and more straightforward interactions. [Read: Finding peace – how to calm your nerves and make peace a state of mind]

8. The honest wardrobe consultant

Ever tried asking a girlfriend if your outfit is cute and gotten the diplomatic, “It’s… interesting”? Your guy best friend won’t mince words. He’ll give you the brutal truth you sometimes need.

While this honesty may sting a little, it can actually help build radical candor in a relationship, which is the sweet spot between obnoxious aggression and ruinous empathy.

9. The co-ed team advantage

You might have heard of the cheerleader effect—the idea that people look more attractive in groups.

Well, guess what? When you step out with your guy best friend, you’re not just a dynamic duo; you’re a co-ed team that turns heads.

10. The friendzone guardian

Having a guy best friend can help ward off unwanted advances. When a creeper doesn’t get the hint, sometimes just standing next to another guy is enough to send the message. [Read: 17 firm ways to ignore a guy and dodge creepy unwanted male attention]

11. Reality check central

Ever catch yourself daydreaming about that ‘perfect relationship’ and wondering why you’re still single? Your guy best friend serves as a grounding force, reminding you that nobody’s perfect and that’s okay.

He keeps your expectations in check, which is crucial for long-term relationship happiness according to numerous psychological studies.

12. Stress buster extraordinaire

Laughing, joking around, and generally just being silly can lower stress levels. That’s not us talking; that’s science. Researchers have found that friendships can release oxytocin, the “feel-good” hormone that reduces stress and increases feelings of well-being.

With a guy best friend, the laughs are often uncomplicated and free-flowing, making him a natural stress buster. [Read: 17 good and bad types of humor and how they affect your relationship with others]

13. Your personal hype man

Think of your guy best friend as your personal life coach who works pro bono. He believes in you, cheers for you, and boosts your confidence. It’s like having your own pocket-sized Tony Robbins, minus the seminars and high fees.

Self-efficacy, or your belief in your abilities, is a key component of success, and who better to help build that than a devoted best friend?

The Disadvantages: When Platonic Gets Problematic

While the advantages are abundant, there are also some real pitfalls that can make navigating this friendship feel like a tightrope walk.

Don’t worry, though; we’re not here to rain on your parade, just to hand you an umbrella.

1. The jealousy factor

Imagine you’re telling your romantic partner about a fun day out with your guy best friend, and suddenly you notice a change in their expression. Are they envious, or is that just the way their face is?

Jealousy is a natural human emotion, and let’s just say, it doesn’t play nice in the sandbox.

This emotional turbulence is often fueled by what psychologists refer to as attachment Theory. The green-eyed monster may rear its head when your romantic partner feels that the emotional investment isn’t equal, aka. your guy best friend is getting more of your attention than you. [Read: Jealous boyfriend – 48 possessive guy signs and all the quickfixes a girl should know]

2. The new girlfriend conundrum

Speaking of jealousy, let’s say your guy best friend just got a new girlfriend. Awesome, right? But now, you find that your usual hangout sessions and inside jokes have suddenly become a touchy subject. What gives?

This scenario could turn into a battle of the green-eyed monsters—her jealousy versus your feelings of being sidelined.

Psychologists call this a triadic relationship, which is basically a fancy term for saying that three’s a crowd. Balancing the old and the new can be a delicate act that requires clear communication and boundaries.

3. Misinterpretation of signals

Ah, the dilemma! You and your guy best friend are so in sync that outsiders might mistake you for a couple. What could go wrong? A lot, if someone starts catching feelings. [Read: Does my guy friend like me? 25 signs he’s crushing on you]

The social exchange theory sheds light on this, explaining how friendships can get confusing when the perceived costs and benefits become uneven. You might think you’re just being good friends, but he might interpret those ‘friendly’ gestures as romantic signals.

4. Boundary issues

It’s movie night, and you’re sprawled on the couch with your guy best friend. As your hand inches closer to his, you pause. Is this okay, or have you crossed an invisible line?

Drawing a line between what’s acceptable and what’s crossing into ‘relationship territory’ is crucial, but it can get murky in male-female friendships. [Read: 23 secrets to set personal boundaries and guide others to respect them]

5. The feelings quagmire

Picture this: one fine day, your guy best friend says something, and you feel your heart do a little… jump. Uh-oh, are those feelings sneaking in?

This is where things can get, let’s say, complicated. When feelings get involved, the friendship is on thin ice.

You’ve officially approached the “crossing the Rubicon” moment in your relationship. Once crossed, there’s no going back, and the friendship risks becoming irreversibly altered. [Read: 42 signs you’re falling in love with your best friend and what you must do next]

6. The date deterrent

You’re out at a bar, your eyes meet with someone across the room, and sparks fly. But wait, what’s this? The potential date spots your guy best friend beside you and makes a U-turn.

It’s a phenomenon backed by mate guarding psychology. The presence of a male best friend can sometimes deter potential romantic interests, who may misinterpret the nature of your friendship as something more.

7. The time-sink trap

Friendships, like any relationship, require time and emotional energy. But when one friendship starts to monopolize your emotional real estate, it can become problematic.

This concept is known in psychology as opportunity costs. Essentially, the time you’re spending with your guy best friend might be time taken away from forming other meaningful relationships, be they other friendships or romantic endeavors.

8. The family feud factor

Introducing a guy best friend to your family can sometimes feel like you’re a contestant on a very awkward game show.

Despite your insistence that it’s platonic, family members may jump to conclusions, causing unnecessary tension. [Read: How to be friends with a guy – 16 friendly ways to just stay platonic]

9. The gendered expectations trap

Even if you and your guy best friend are in perfect sync, society might have other ideas. Social norms theory suggests that societal expectations about how men and women ‘should’ interact can impose limitations on your friendship.

This could mean facing criticism or judgment from others who just can’t wrap their heads around your platonic relationship.

10. The double-standard dilemma 2.0

Here’s a zinger: you notice that people around you are totally cool with your male friends having close friendships with other men, but when it comes to you and your guy best friend, eyebrows shoot up.

It’s not just raised eyebrows; it’s the whispers, the nudges, and the wink-wink implications.

People might readily assume that you’re either secretly in love or enjoying some undercover benefits *if you catch our drift*. [Read: Fuck buddy – the casual sex guide to hook up and have sex with a friend]

11. The evolving dynamic

Friendships aren’t static; they evolve. Your guy best friend today could be in a different life stage tomorrow, which can create a gap wider than the Grand Canyon.

Developmental psychology talks about life stages and transitions, and this isn’t just textbook talk—your friendship will need to adapt and change as you both grow.

The “Just Friends” Debate: What Does Science Say?

And now, we’re diving into the “Just Friends” debate—a topic so juicy it could be a prime-time TV drama. Everyone’s got their own opinion, but what does science have to say?

1. Sexual tension: A myth?

You’re at a party with your guy best friend, and someone corners you with the “Is something going on between you two?” question. Wink-wink, nudge-nudge.

Time for some Freudian real talk. Studies have delved into the subject of sexual attraction between male and female friends. And the result? It’s a mixed bag. While some friendships report an underlying tension, it’s by no means a universal rule. [Read: Awkward after having sex with a friend? 19 mature steps to stay friends]

2. Evolutionary psychology: The hunter-gatherer lens

Have you ever heard that men are “naturally” inclined to “spread their seeds,” making platonic friendships a no-go?

Yeah, science wants to have a word. Evolutionary psychology points out that our hunter-gatherer ancestors had a lot more to worry about than who they were texting. Spoiler alert: being “programmed” to avoid platonic friendships is mostly a modern myth.

3. The longevity factor

So, you’ve been friends with your guy best friend since high school, and now you’re navigating adulthood together. Do these friendships stand the test of time?

Longitudinal studies suggest that cross-sex friendships can be as enduring as same-sex ones, given the right circumstances. Meaning? If both of you are on the same page and communicate openly, you’ve got yourself a friendship for the long haul.

Navigating the Guy Bestie Waters

Now that we’ve gone through the perks and the pitfalls, how do we navigate the choppy waters of having a guy best friend without going overboard?

1. Setting boundaries

Imagine you and your guy best friend chilling and watching a movie when he suddenly rests his head on your lap.

Cute or crossing a line? This is something that you need to personally decide and agree on together if you want this friendship to last. [Read: 25 types, ways, and tips to set boundaries with friends without insulting them]

2. Communication is key

You and your guy best friend are texting late into the night, but something feels off. To get to the bottom of it, a quick “Hey, are we good?” might be in order.

Psychology nerds *guilty as charged!* call this metacommunication—talking about how you communicate. It’s crucial to openly discuss your needs and expectations to prevent any friendship fumbles. [Read: 42 secrets to communicate in a relationship and ways to fix a lack of it]

3. Be aware of emotional labor

Ever feel like you’re the one always picking up the emotional slack in your friendship? Like you’re the go-to person for advice, but when you need a listening ear, it’s radio silence?

Hey there, transactional analysis! This theory posits that relationships should not be emotionally draining for just one party.

Make sure the “emotional transactions” are balanced, so you’re not left emotionally bankrupt. [Read: One-sided friendship – 31 causes, signs, and how they can hurt and break you]

4. Just enjoy the friendship

At the end of the day, why complicate what’s simple? Your guy best friend is your friend, first and foremost. Forget the labels, the societal norms, and the hushed whispers from the peanut gallery.

According to positive psychology, fostering genuine friendships—regardless of gender—contributes to emotional well-being and overall happiness.

So kick back, enjoy your time together, and cherish the friendship for what it is: a unique, irreplaceable connection that adds color to your life.

Can Men and Women Be Just Friends? Yes!

So, let’s circle back to the burning question that started it all: Can men and women be just friends? After weaving through the perks, the downsides, the science, and the strategies, our answer is a resounding yes!

Of course, like anything in life, having a guy best friend comes with its unique set of pros and cons. But honestly, what friendship doesn’t?

[Read: Good friends are like stars – 18 ways to build lasting friendships]

And hey, if Harry and Sally can turn a complicated relationship into an iconic friendship, why can’t we all? It’s time to embrace the guy best friend in your life for all the laughs, the late-night talks, and the irreplaceable memories they bring.

The post 31 Good, Bad & Truths Every Girl MUST Know about Having a Guy Best Friend is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Answering Some High-Level Questions About "The Game"

Do you still get those same ‘connected’ feelings when you use game? What if you want them? Is ‘game’ overcomplicated? Plus more questions on the meta.

A Guy with a Girlfriend Likes You: 15 Truths to Read His Mind & Intentions

Does a guy with a girlfriend flirt with you or look at you all the time? Here are all the things to keep in mind when this guy tries to get your attention.

It’s flattering, isn’t it? This guy is in a relationship with a pretty girl, but he’s also insanely attracted to you!

You may just be hanging out with your friends when you notice this guy staring at you for the first time.

You look away, and don’t think too much about it.

And then again, the next day and the day after that too, you find this cute guy with a girlfriend looking your way and trying to catch your attention.

Curiosity gets to you, and you wonder what’s on his mind.

Really, isn’t he dating another girl already?

So why on earth is he trying to catch your fancy?!

You start glancing back now and then involuntarily to read his mind.

And before you know it, a couple of weeks later, both of you start blushing and stealing glances all the time, or even start flirting with each other.

[Read: Does he like you? – 18 sure signs to decode his body language]

The guy with a girlfriend and the flirty games he plays

You know he’s dating someone all along, so even when he tries to look towards you or flirt with you, you don’t believe anything romantic could come off of it.

You convince yourself that it’s just harmless fun, and you go with the flirty flow. During your conversations with him, you open up to him faster because, firstly, he’s dating someone else so he can’t be serious about getting close to you, and secondly, because you just want to know what’s on his damn mind!

But somewhere along the way, you start falling for him and his sweet honey-laced words. [Read: 21 signs you’re falling for a guy even if you don’t realize it!]

The thrill of getting the attention of a guy with a girlfriend

This guy has a girlfriend already. And yet, he’s still trying to woo you and flirt with you! Gee, so that must mean you’re really good and way better than his girlfriend, right?

Why else would a great guy want your attention when he already has a girlfriend who loves him?

The thought that a guy with a girlfriend is falling hard for you can be complimenting, and also somewhat daring and reckless. And that makes the whole sordid flirting so much more intense and addictive. [Read: Is flirting really cheating when you’re in a relationship?]

And if you do find yourself falling for him or craving his attention all the time, don’t hate yourself for it. We always want what we can’t have, especially a lover who’s already taken by someone else!

The things a guy with a girlfriend could do to woo you

When a guy who already has a girlfriend tries to win your affection, there are a few things he may try. And almost always, it all starts with the same pattern.

The ten things a guy with a girlfriend could do to win you over almost always starts with a few stares to begin with, and may go all the way to number 10 on this list to win your heart and woo you. [Read: 15 very obvious flirting signs between a guy and a girl]

1. He looks at you constantly

If he doesn’t know you yet, this is something you’re bound to see very often. He’ll try to get your attention by looking at you when his girlfriend isn’t around.

And sometimes, he may recklessly stare at you even if his girlfriend is around which can make you feel really flattered! [Read: 10 subtle eye contact moves that always work!]

2. You sense something in the air

You can feel the chemistry between the both of you when you guys have a conversation with each other. If both of you have been introduced to each other, you may see him stare at you intensely while talking to you. [Read: 20 signs of attraction in the first conversation you have with a guy]

3. He flirts with you

This is something you’d notice, especially when it’s just the both of you and no one’s around.

4. He texts you constantly

A guy with a girlfriend can’t always stand around and talk to you in front of his girlfriend, so he picks a more convenient way to flirt with you. And nothing beats flirty texting late at night!

5. He tells you he likes you, but he has a girlfriend

There’s no use hiding a secret that’s obvious. So a guy with a girlfriend may come clean and tell you that he already has a girlfriend, but he likes you a lot too.

He may groan and moan about how frustrating it is for him because he’s in a relationship with someone and still falling in love with you at the same time. This would win him your sympathy. And at the same time, your love too! [Read: 75 HUGE signs to tell if a guy likes you and secrets to make him fall harder]

6. He asks you out on a secret date

Can a guy have the cake and eat it too? Of course, he can *as long as you’re gullible or so in love with him already*.

He could tell you that he really likes spending time with you and would want to meet you sometime. And even though you know he has a girlfriend, the thought of having him all for yourself could cloud your judgment. [Read: Signs he wants to have a secret relationship with you]

7. He touches you a lot

If a guy is infatuated by you, he’s definitely going to have a hard time keeping his hands off your body and specific parts.

And since he’s come clean that he’s in a relationship but in love with you, both of you don’t think twice about all the lusty touchy feeling flirting. In fact, the flirty touches may even bring both of you closer. [Read: 13 lusty signs of sexual attraction to watch out for!]

8. He’s tried to kiss you, or he’s kissed you already

Passions can rise and sparks can fly when two people are involved in a morally wrong relationship. And it’s only a matter of time before he seduces you into kissing him or even making out with him.

It’ll be really hard for you to hold back, especially when he says he loves you so much more than he loves his girlfriend!

9. He tells you he loves you

Well, you know he loves you already. But this time, he makes it official.

He tells you he loves you and wants to date you. But. He needs some time to dump his girlfriend and let her down easy because she’s going to be devastated. A few days or weeks, he says. [Read: Love triangles and the messy complications it can bring you]

10. He tells you he’ll break up with his girlfriend for you

If you’re firm and tell him that you aren’t interested in dating him unless he breaks up with his girlfriend, he may even break up with his girlfriend for you. *He may just tell his girlfriend that they need space in the relationship for a while!*

Why do these guys with girlfriends do that?!!

Do you want the simple answer? Well, because you’re reciprocating and falling for it!

A guy would stare at several girls he finds interesting *even if he’s in a relationship already*. But he falls only for the girl who reciprocates his stares and shows interest in him. [Read: How men fall in love – The seven stages of love for men]

If you catch a guy staring at you a few times, but you ignore him, he’ll stop staring at you after a few more tries or a few more days.

But if you stare back at him or try to catch his eye now and then, it’s a sure sign that you’re interested in the flirty eye contact too. And that’ll give him the motivation to chase you and pursue you.

So if you want to avoid these guys with girlfriends, as hard as it sounds, don’t give them any attention no matter how hard they try or how flattering the idea may seem!

The two kinds of guys who want another girl’s attention

Now here’s something you need to remember. Not all guys with girlfriends constantly look out for other girls to date or flirt with. But there are a few of them that you will come across now and then.

Here are the two kinds of guys who are generally interested in attracting other women outside the relationship. [Read: Why do men cheat? – 3 really big reasons and 27 more!]

1. A guy who’s doing it because it is fun

This is the kind of guy who knows he’s hitched with a girl but he also knows that he’s got what it takes to impress other girls and win their affection.

He uses his flirting skills for fun, and doesn’t try to seduce girls into falling in love with him. He’s like the Casanova who’s happy in a perfect relationship with his girlfriend, but likes the occasional attention from other girls.

2. A guy who’s uninterested in his relationship

This is the kind of guy who’s in a relationship, but not in love. He may have his own reasons for disliking his girlfriend or the relationship. And without realizing it himself, chances are, he may be falling in love with you too. [Read: The 12 dating stereotypes of girls in a guy’s mind]

What do you want to do now?

So you know he’s taken, and yet you like him. So what do you do now? Here are three scenarios that you could choose from.

1. Do you want to win him over?

Now he’s dating someone else already, and it’s morally wrong to interfere with their relationship. But does he really like you? Would he be willing to leave his girlfriend for you? If you think so, you could steal him from his girlfriend. [Read:  The sneaky and effective guide to stealing a guy from his girlfriend]

2. Do you want to avoid complications and confusions?

If you don’t like complications and drama in your life, walk away. If you find out that a guy who’s trying to flirt with you already has a girlfriend, stop giving him attention. He’ll get bored of trying to catch your eye and give up soon. [Read: How to be just friends with a guy who wants more]

3. Do you just want to have some fun?

Well, this is the middle path, and it’s reckless and fun. So the guy with a girlfriend is giving you attention and you’re flattered by it. You can continue to just have fun and flirt with him now and then, when you feel like it.

If you’re a bad girl who likes living flirty and dangerous, use him when you’re bored instead of letting him use you! But remember to avoid letting things go beyond harmless flirting or you may fall for him before you even realize it. [Read: 10 sexy ways to seduce a guy who’s not yours!]

The last word of advice

It’s flattering when a guy who’s committed to a nice girl seems mesmerized by you. But don’t take these stares too seriously.

A committed guy may try to flirt with a girl for many reasons. He may think you’re attractive. He may want to convince himself that he’s still hot stuff who can get any girl he wants if he chooses to.

He may just want some excitement in his life. Or he may just be trying to have some fun when his girlfriend isn’t around, or using you to make his girl jealous.

If a guy with a girlfriend starts flirting with you and you really like him, back away from him to see what he does.

If he truly likes you and wants to end his existing relationship to be with you, he may continue to pursue you even after you cold-shoulder him. And if he asks you out or tells you he loves you, ask him to break up with his girlfriend and then make a commitment to you. [Read: How to reject a guy and turn him down without hurting him]

Flirting with a guy who has a girlfriend is all fun and dandy, until you fall for him or get into an illicit affair with him.

And then what do you get? You risk your neck out for him, and he may walk out of your life and go back into his girlfriend’s arms once your novelty’s worn off.

And you’d be back on square one. And to the rest of the world, you’d always be the bitchy girl who tried stealing a good girl’s boyfriend. You’d be the other woman. And that’s never a good place to be. [Confession: I had an affair with a committed guy and suffered for it]

[Read: The dating girl code all girls definitely need to know!]

If a guy with a girlfriend’s giving you attention, feel flattered and enjoy it. Have fun and even flirt back if you must. But don’t fall in love with him, at least not until he can commit to you wholeheartedly.

The post A Guy with a Girlfriend Likes You: 15 Truths to Read His Mind & Intentions is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Tactics Tuesdays: Approaching & Opening Groups of People

Approaching & opening a group of people may seem intimidating. Who do you focus on? How do you handle the others? These 2 strategies get you in the door.

You’re at the bar, or the mall, or the beach, and see a group of people.

You decide you want to talk to them. Maybe they look cool; maybe there’s a cute girl in the group.

Either way, you need to start a conversation… somehow.

How do you open when it’s a group of people?

There are two (2) ways: one bolder, and one more discreet.

73 Best Tinder Pickup Lines & Openers to Catch Their Eye & Make Them Reply

Finding a match on Tinder is difficult, but coming up with pickup lines is even worse! Use this go-to list for Tinder openers and the psychology behind them.

So, you’re swiping through Tinder, thumbs nimble, eyes sharp. There’s a fine line between a pickup line that’s a laugh-out-loud winner and one that’s a full-on cringe fest. Trust us, it’s more nuanced than choosing between “Hey, how’s it going?” and “Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.”

If you have a pickup line already typed out, hold your horses and don’t click ‘send’ just yet. We’ll go over the classic pickup lines, a few you probably haven’t considered, and let you in on the secrets of picking out the perfect message to send your online crush. [Read: How to use Tinder – 28 Tinder tips, tricks & secrets to get you all the matches]

Why winning hearts on Tinder is harder than in-person

Now, you might be thinking, “Why is it so hard to land a match on Tinder when I’m perfectly charming in real life?”

Well, here’s the scoop, love aficionados! You’re not just up against clever bios and profile photos, you’re also battling the limitations of digital interaction itself.

1. The psychology of the five senses

In real-world interactions, you’ve got your full sensory arsenal at your disposal—smell, touch, taste, sight, and hearing.

All these factors contribute to what psychologists call the halo effect, a cognitive bias where our impression of a person in one domain influences our feelings in another.

For example, if you smell great, someone might find your jokes funnier *no, seriously, look it up!*.

2. The digital sensory deficit

However, on Tinder, you’re stripped down to just one or two senses: sight and maybe sound if you get creative with voice notes or video clips. This truncation of sensory cues makes it harder to convey your full personality and charm.

Your matches don’t get to hear the intriguing timbre of your voice, feel the warmth of your touch during a subtle moment, or catch that unique scent that makes you, well, you.

3. The role of micro-expressions

Additionally, let’s not forget the fleeting but impactful language of micro-expressions. A quick smile, a twinkle in your eyes, or even a nervous twitch—all these are cues we pick up unconsciously in real life but are nearly impossible to capture in a static Tinder profile.

Wondering how to stand out in the sea of profiles?

Unlocking the psychology behind successful Tinder pickup lines and Tinder openers can elevate your dating game and give you a swipe-right advantage. Yes, there’s more to that opening message than meets the eye—or the thumb. [Read: How to write a dating profile – 18 must-know tips to stand apart]

In the fast-paced world of online dating, where split-second decisions reign supreme, your first message is your opening act. And we all know first impressions matter, especially when the curtain rises and falls faster than you can update your profile picture.

By dissecting what makes certain Tinder openers and pickup lines resonate, we offer you the key to making your introduction not just memorable, but swipe-right worthy.

Why traditional pickup lines and openers often fail

Before we arm you with Tinder pickup lines and openers that’ll have your matches swooning—or at least chuckling—we need to talk about the lines that have gone down in flames.

You know, the ones that make people unmatch quicker than you can say, “But wait, there’s more!”

Why do so many traditional pickup lines send people running for the hills? Well, it’s simple: they’re often perceived as uninspiring, desperate, or downright creepy.

It’s like showing up to a job interview and saying, “Hire me, I’m desperate.” Not a good look, right?

Here’s where psychology spices up our Tinder game. The term “adverse social reactions” refers to the negative emotions elicited by interactions perceived as low-effort or inauthentic. [Read: How to make a good first impression and impress everyone you meet]

In layman’s terms, cheesy or generic lines can make you seem insincere or lazy, causing the other person to emotionally disengage. You be the judge:

1. “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”

Why it fails: Overused to the point of being cliché, this line doesn’t exactly scream originality. People are more likely to roll their eyes than to engage in a conversation. [Read: What is a thirsty girl? The signs to tell if you are desperate & parched]

2. “You must be a magician because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.”

Why it fails: It feels rehearsed and inauthentic. Most folks want to connect with real people, not walking pickup line machines.

3. “Hey, how’s it going?”

Why it fails: While it may not be offensive, it’s too generic to stand out among the sea of other openers. [Read: 20 fun, exciting ways not to be dry when texting a girl & keep her hooked]

4. “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”

Why it fails: This line has been around since paper maps were a thing *remember those?*. It’s outdated and implies a lack of creativity.

5. “Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!”

Why it fails: Not only is this one cheesy, but it can also come off as trying too hard to be clever, triggering those adverse social reactions we talked about.

6. “Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest.”

Why it fails: Mixing love and finance? Kinda risky unless you’re on Wall Street. This one is more likely to evoke thoughts of debt than any romantic sparks.

7. “You must be French because Eiffel for you.”

Why it fails: Puns can be great, but they can also toe the line between charming and cringeworthy. In this case, we’ve crossed the border into eye-roll territory.

8. “Netflix or adventure?”

Why it fails: While it aims to be open-ended, it’s become a victim of its own popularity. In the world of Tinder openers, it’s about as original as a Hollywood reboot.

The elements of a successful Tinder pickup line

After exploring the dark alleys of cringe-worthy Tinder pickup lines and openers, let’s step into the sunshine, shall we?

What makes a pickup line go from “Meh” to “Oh wow, tell me more”? Well, we can thank psychology for that.

1. Reciprocal Liking

When you show genuine interest in someone, the likelihood of them being interested in you in return increases. It’s a bit like a mirror—if you smile at it, it smiles right back.

In the context of Tinder pickup lines, this means showing a little vulnerability or complimenting the other person can go a long way. [Read: 18 risk-free secrets to tell someone you like them & not get rejected]

2. Social validation

You know how we’re more likely to try a restaurant if our friends rave about it? That’s social validation. In the world of Tinder, name-dropping something from their profile—like a shared interest—can make your opener more compelling because it comes with a stamp of social approval.

Tinder pickup lines and openers that work like a charm

Alright, folks, now that we’ve covered what not to do and sprinkled in a little psychology, let’s get to the good stuff—Tinder pickup lines and openers that you should definitely stash away for future romantic endeavors.

Trust us, you’ll want to keep these gems close to your swipe-happy thumb. So bookmark-worthy, you might as well go ahead and hit that ‘Save’ button now—because you’ll want to come back to this treasure trove the next time you’re prepping for a swiping marathon!

1. “Hey [Name], you seem like a [shared interest] enthusiast too! Have you visited [related location]?”

This opener starts a conversation based on mutual interests, which is always a strong play. [Read: 80 VERY good conversation starters that’ll make anyone love talking to you!]

2. “Wow, your Spotify anthem is [Song]? I can’t believe we share the same questionable taste in music!”

Do you both like the same song? Score! Now, you have at least one thing to chat about.

3. “Your photos are amazing! Are you into photography, or were you just blessed by the Instagram gods?”

Compliments never fail to break the ice, and mentioning a specific interest adds authenticity.

4. “I see you’re into [Hobby]. Ever tried [related activity]?”

This shows you’ve read their profile and are interested in their passions.

5. “I couldn’t help but notice your love for dogs. What’s your pup’s name?”

Because let’s be honest, who can resist talking about their fur baby?

6. “Just trying to make you laugh before some other guy’s abs do.”

A bit of humor can go a long way, and this line delivers it with a wink.

7. “I saw you like [Book]. Is it weird that I’ve read it three times?”

Shows you share similar tastes and you’re well-read to boot. [Read: How to talk to girls on Tinder – 25 ways to be and feel more confident]

8. “So, we matched! Does this mean we’re dating now, or…?”

Humorously addressing the elephant in the room is sometimes the best approach.

9. “You’re a [Job Title]? That’s awesome! Do you enjoy it?”

Inquiring about their career can open up a wealth of conversational topics.

10. “Love your fashion sense. Where do you usually shop?”

A compliment and a question rolled into one makes for an engaging opener.

11. “You must be a magician, because whenever I look at your photos, everyone else disappears.”

Yes, this line can be cheesy, but when used correctly, it can also be endearing and flirty.

12. “Are you an angel? Because heaven is missing one!”

It’s flirty without going overboard, as long as you deliver it with a playful tone.

13. “Mind if I ask what you’re looking for here? Because I might just be it.”

Forward but intriguing, just like a mystery novel. [Read: Playful banter – what it is, how to do it & secrets to keep the flirty talk going]

14. “Is it hot in here, or is it just you?”

Time-tested and still packs a flirty punch.

15. “If we were both emojis, I’d be the heart eyes and you’d be the flame. ”

This Tinder pickup line is a modern take on flirting for the emoji era.

16. “Not gonna lie, I was swiping left until I saw you.”

This one’s a little bold but gives off a vibe of exclusivity.

17. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!”

Cute, punny, and light-hearted—a triple threat! [Read: 27 secrets to tell a woman she’s beautiful & cute examples to make her melt]

18. “I must say, your profile is picture-perfect. How could I resist?”

Flattery done right can go a long way.

19. “Did we just share an elevator? Because I think we’ve got some serious ‘uplifting’ chemistry.”

Cheesy? Maybe. Cute and memorable? Absolutely.

20. “Swipe right if I’m your type, swipe left if you’re wrong.”

A little cocky, but in a playful way that adds to the allure.

21. “Honestly, I couldn’t help but swipe right. Your charm is too magnetic.”

Sometimes, straightforward and complimentary is the best way to go.

22. “You had me at ‘Dog Lover.’ Now tell me more so I can fall completely head over paws for you.”

Incorporating shared interests like pets can make a flirty line even more impactful.

23. “So, what’s a gorgeous person like you doing in a virtual place like this?”

A flirty twist on an old classic. [Read: The 17 best dating apps for men [2023] to help you meet the one]

24. “You don’t need a pickup line, you need a pickup truck for all that attractiveness you’re carrying!”

Humorous, quirky, and definitely on the flirty side.

25. “We must have a lot in common because we both swiped right on attractiveness and good taste.”

Self-assured but balanced with a compliment for them.

26. “We must have a Wi-Fi connection, because I’m definitely feeling a vibe.”

Modern yet cheesy, this one could hook someone looking for a laugh.

27. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a radish… because you make my heart ‘beet’ faster.”

Another pun, but one that’s less likely to be as worn out as the classic “cute-cumber.”

28. “Two truths and a lie: I’ve climbed Mount Everest, I love binge-watching, and I swiped right just for your smile.”

Interactive and fun, this is a good way to get a convo going.

29. “Instead of a pickup line, how about a pick-up plan? Coffee, tea, or something stronger?”

This takes the initiative and moves things to the next level. [Read: Where to go on a first date – 85 best first date ideas that are fun & romantic]

30. “So, on a lazy Sunday: Netflix, outdoors, or something else?”

Gives an insight into what your weekends could look like together.

31. “Let’s say we both abandon this app for good. What’s our success story?”

Imagining a future, even a playful one, can be an intriguing opener.

32. “I have to say, your profile caught my eye. I would say my heart, but my eyes saw you first.”

A poetic line for those with a flair for the romantic.

33. “Are you a campfire? Because you bring the marshmallow out of me.”

A cute line that’s both sweet and slightly cheesy.

34. “Let’s make a deal: I’ll bring the charm, you bring the looks, and we’ll see what happens.”

A playful proposal to spice up the introductory stage.

35. “You seem like the kind of person who’s heard every line in the book. So, what’s one more?”

A self-aware opener that acknowledges the world of online dating.

36. “Feeling brave? How about we skip the small talk and dive into something deep?”

For those who are tired of surface-level chats. [Read: 94 seriously deep, revealing questions to ask a guy & get to know him ASAP]

37. “Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I scraped my knee falling for you.”

A tad cheesy, but it’s a modern take on an old-school line.

38. “If you were a Spotify playlist, you’d be ‘Daily Mix 1’ because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.”

Relatable for music lovers and modern daters alike.

39. “So, how does it feel to be the best-looking person on Tinder right now?”

Boosting their ego can be an effective icebreaker.

40. “Tell me, do you believe in love at first swipe?”

A playful line that brings a smile and perhaps a swipe in the right direction.

41. “You’ve got everything I’m searching for, and believe me—I looked.”

Compliment their completeness without comparing them to anyone else.

42. “Okay, so we matched. What’s our first-date Spotify playlist?”

A fun, modern way to fantasize about a future date.

43. “Your profile says you love to travel. Are you up for a romantic getaway or a local adventure?”

Opens up multiple conversational paths based on their interests

44. “If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together. But for now, how about a ‘Hi’?”

A contemporary twist on a tried-and-true line. [Read: 78 cute, flirty pickup lines to show off your romantic side & start talking!]

45. “Is it okay if I walk you home? To my heart, that is.”

Sweet, and maybe just the right amount of corny.

46. “You must be a high test score, because I want to take you home and show you to my mother.”

Nerdy but endearing, this one brings a smile.

47. “Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?”

A play on words that’s cute and prompts a reaction.

48. “Are we, like, married now?”

Over-the-top and humorous, this line shows you don’t take Tinder too seriously.

49. “You’re so out of my league, but I thought I’d take a shot and go for the gold.”

Complimentary, yet aware of your own humility. [Read: 53 flirty things to say to a girl to compliment her & make her blush]

50. “Swipe right if you’re as awesome as I think you are. Swipe left and you’re letting a good thing go!”

Confidence is king, and this line lets them know you’re interested but not desperate.

Quick tips and reminders for mastering Tinder pickup lines and openers

Hold onto your smartphones! Now that we’ve unpacked the psychology and strategy behind those oh-so-crucial first words, it’s time for some final wisdom.

Without further ado, here’s your pocket guide to hitting that sweet spot between “try-hard” and “hardly trying.”

1. Be genuine

Authenticity tends to shine brighter than any polished Tinder pickup line. Remember, real recognizes real. [Read: 37 online flirting secrets to read non-verbal cues, emojis & text boundaries]

2. Context matters

A great line could fall flat if it doesn’t align with the other person’s profile. Do your homework; skim their bio and photos.

3. First impressions count, but they’re not final

You may not always get it right the first time. Don’t be afraid to recover with a witty follow-up.

4. Spelling and grammar

Seriously, don’t underestimate this. Bad grammar is to romance what garlic is to a first kiss.

5. Beware of the timing

Psychologists call this the “recency effect.” Messages sent at odd hours may not receive immediate attention, reducing their impact. [Read: 32 must-know texting rules for guys to master the art of charm & being smooth]

6. Humor is your friend

It’s scientifically proven that laughter releases endorphins. Make them laugh with your Tinder pickup line, and you’re halfway to their heart.

7. Steer clear of negativity

Keep the conversation upbeat. Negativity can be a swift turn-off.

8. Be mindful of individual differences

Cultural, gender, and individual preferences can all affect how your line is received.

9. Follow through

A great opener is just the start, keep the conversation going by asking open-ended questions and showing interest in their responses.

10. Quality over quantity

It’s easy to get swipe-happy, but your chances of a meaningful connection are higher when you’re selective and attentive.

Go ahead and capture hearts— one clever line at a time

If love is a battlefield, consider this your armor and artillery. The next time you find yourself in the swipe-arena of Tinder, armed with these psychology-backed Tinder pickup lines and openers, you won’t just be another face in the crowd. You’ll be the one capturing hearts—one clever line at a time.

[Read: 29 fun apps like Tinder & alternatives to get you more matches and dates]

If you’re looking for the best Tinder pickup lines and openers to start a conversation, look no further. We’ve got the best and worst pickup lines, and a little psychology to back it up! So open your dating app, try these Tinder pickup lines, and watch the magic!

The post 73 Best Tinder Pickup Lines & Openers to Catch Their Eye & Make Them Reply is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Repressed Anger: 22 Healing Ways to Release Anger & Focus on the Positives

Anger is a natural human emotion. We all feel it from time to time, but we all need to know how to release anger in a healthy way. So, here’s how to do it.

You’re stuck in traffic. Again. The driver in front of you is moving slower than a snail on vacation, and the red light seems to be having the time of its life staying red. You can feel your heartbeat rising, and your grip tightens on the steering wheel. That’s when you need to know how to release anger.

Sound familiar? Moments like these can make us ponder the age-old question: How can we release anger in a healthy way? In this feature, we’ll explore the complex psychology behind anger and dig into the scientific methods to manage it.

Get ready for an intriguing journey into understanding how to release anger—without cursing at innocent traffic lights or putting a dent in your steering wheel.

The Psychology of Anger

So, you’re in that traffic jam, and you’re fuming. But what’s really going on inside of you? Well, our good friends William James and Carl Lange came up with a theory to explain this emotional rollercoaster.

According to the James-Lange Theory of Emotion, your heart isn’t racing because you’re angry. You’re actually angry because your heart is racing. That’s right, your body is pulling a fast one on you!

It’s like your physiology throws a party and your emotions are the last to get the invite. This understanding could be a first step on your journey to figure out how to release anger in a meaningful way.

Now, you might be wondering why we get so hot under the collar in the first place. It’s not like we’re looking to get all huffy and puffy, right? Let’s hit the rewind button and travel back—way back—to our cave-dwelling days.

Anger had a vital role in the survival kit of early humans. [Read: 22 Secrets to stop being so angry, calm your mind, and stop hurting yourself]

When someone tried to snatch your freshly hunted dinner, getting angry had a purpose. You see, anger can fuel social cohesion and self-preservation.

If you didn’t get a little fiery, you’d probably starve or become someone else’s dinner. But in modern times, getting angry at a colleague for stealing your stapler probably won’t save your life, although it may help you identify repressed anger that needs to be addressed.

Science-Backed Methods to Release Anger

Alright, so you’ve identified that you’re angry—what’s next? You don’t want to let it fester, creating a boiling pot of repressed anger. [Read: Angry sex – the primal secrets to have a wild time and do it safe and right]

No, you want to release it in a way that’s both healthy and effective. Let’s check out what the experts suggest on how to release anger without throwing any punches—literally or metaphorically.

1. Mindfulness

So, mindfulness, that buzzword that’s been floating around like a butterfly, actually has some strong scientific legs to stand on.

Studies on Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction *MBSR* show that being aware of the present moment can significantly regulate emotional reactivity.

In simpler terms, mindfulness allows you to catch yourself before you fall down the anger rabbit hole. It’s like having a built-in emotional brake system.

2. Physical Exercise as an Outlet

Here’s a fun one—get moving! Whether you’re into Zumba or powerlifting, physical activity has a pretty neat trick up its sleeve: it releases endorphins.

These little chemicals act as natural mood lifters, helping you dissipate that cloud of anger hanging over you. A little sweat can go a long way when you’re figuring out how to release anger. [Read: 26 Secrets to get motivated to work out and exercise your way to a better life]

3. Take a Hot, Relaxing Bath

Imagine your roommate leaves a pile of dishes in the sink for the umpteenth time, and you’re starting to steam.

A hot bath can do wonders for your mood by triggering the release of dopamine, our brain’s “feel-good” neurotransmitter. Plus, the warm water can physically relax tense muscles, a common symptom of repressed anger.

4. Go to Sleep

Your boss sends an unreasonable email request right as you’re about to clock out for the day. Your first reaction is to reply with a snarky comment. [Read: 21 Common couple sleeping positions, what they mean, and the best ones]

Sleep serves as a natural emotional reset button. Studies have shown that lack of sleep exacerbates emotional reactivity, so catching some Zs can offer a fresh perspective on how to release anger.

5. Listen to Uplifting Music

You get a parking ticket even though you swear you were within the lines. Rage starts to build. Research indicates that music can modulate activity in brain regions linked to emotion.

Uplifting tunes may activate your brain’s reward pathways, providing an immediate way to release anger. [Read: 40 Fun and upbeat songs to groove you out of that funk]

6. Paint or Do Something Crafty

You find out your favorite coffee shop is out of your go-to blend. How could they? Creative expression can be a potent form of emotional release.

The act of creating something can redirect your focus and energy away from feelings of anger or repressed anger.

7. Play with a Pet

Your online order gets delayed, and you’re tempted to send an angry email to customer service. [Read: Adopting a pet? The true signs you’re ready to get a pet together]

Interacting with pets has been shown to release oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone,” which can counteract feelings of anger and stress. Who knew Fluffy was so therapeutic?

8. Write in a Journal

You’re just having one of those days where everything seems to go wrong. Journaling can serve as a form of cognitive restructuring, a technique often used in CBT.

By putting your thoughts on paper, you can gain a new perspective on how to release both immediate and repressed anger. [Read: Narcissistic rage – how to handle the angry backlash of a narcissist]

9. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy *CBT* Techniques

Last but definitely not least, let’s talk CBT. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy offers a handy tool known as the ABC Model.

“A” stands for the activating event *that traffic jam or stolen stapler*, “B” is your belief about the event, and “C” is the emotional consequence.

By challenging your beliefs, you can actually change how you feel. It’s like being your own emotional detective, investigating how to release both immediate and repressed anger.

Unconventional But Effective Ways to Release Anger

And if you’ve already tried the things listed above and are looking for something a bit more, shall we say, unconventional, you might want to check out these unexpected yet science-backed methods for releasing both immediate and repressed anger.

Trust us, they’re not just fun and different—they’re legit effective. [Read: 41 Rules of life to never be unhappy and be the one who screams “I love my life”]

1. Laughter Therapy

Imagine you’ve been caught in another long Zoom meeting that could’ve been an email *we’ve all been there*. The tension rises. But what if, instead of banging your head on the desk, you just let out a hearty laugh?

Believe it or not, laughter therapy is a thing. In fact, laughter has been found to increase the production of endorphins, the body’s natural feel-good chemicals.

It’s like flipping a switch to de-escalate your mood, giving you a quirky but effective method on how to release anger.

2. Pet Therapy

You’re waiting in a never-ending queue, and you’re almost at the boiling point. Instead of visualizing punching a wall, how about petting a dog or cuddling with a cat?

Studies have shown that interactions with pets can increase levels of oxytocin. This hormone, often called the “love hormone,” has the magical ability to calm your nervous system and decrease feelings of anger. [Read: 9 Tips for couples who are planning to get a pet]

3. Rage Rooms

Picture out you’ve had a day where everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. Instead of keeping it all bottled up, you find yourself in a room where you can safely smash things to bits—legally! Welcome to the world of rage rooms.

These spaces are designed for you to vent your frustrations in a controlled environment. [Read: I hate my ex – 21 reasons why it’s okay and steps to handle the rage positively]

Some studies suggest that physical expression can be a valid form of catharsis, providing a release valve for pent-up emotions, including repressed anger.

4. Forest Bathing

You’re scrolling through social media, seeing people live their “best lives,” and you can’t help but feel a surge of envy and irritation. Instead of stewing in your feelings, why not take a walk among the trees?

The Japanese practice of “Shinrin-yoku,” or forest bathing, has been shown to reduce stress hormone levels and improve mood. It’s a serene method for those looking for a gentle way on how to release anger.

5. Food Smashing

You’ve just had an argument, and you’re feeling all kinds of heated. Instead of eating your feelings, what if you literally smashed them? Some folks find solace in taking a hammer to a watermelon or crushing grapes underfoot.

Though there’s limited scientific data specifically on food smashing, the act can offer a similar cathartic release to more physical outlets like exercise. Plus, it’s not quite a good idea to waste food.

6. Drumming Circles

Stuck in traffic again and ready to honk your way into more stress? How about drumming your frustrations away? Drumming has been used in various cultures as a form of emotional release. [Read: 17 Life secrets to smile more often, feel great and laugh your stress away]

Research has indicated that group drumming, in particular, can produce emotional and social benefits, offering another intriguing option on how to release anger.

The Consequences of Holding onto Anger

Alright, we’ve talked a lot about how to release anger, but let’s switch gears and discuss what happens when you don’t. It’s not just your mood that takes a hit; both your body and your relationships can suffer.

So, let’s delve into the science-backed consequences of hanging onto that pent-up or repressed anger. Trust us, the stakes are higher than you might think! [Read: 5 Ways volunteer work can help with depression]

1. Physical Impact

Imagine you’ve been feeling irritable for weeks, snapping at everyone from your barista to your best friend. Your anger isn’t just annoying; it’s actually bad for your heart—literally.

Studies have found that prolonged anger can be a risk factor for conditions like hypertension and cardiovascular disease. That repressed anger you’re holding onto could be ticking away like a time bomb, affecting your overall physical health.

2. Emotional and Psychological Impact

You had a terrible, no good, very bad day at work, and now you’re home sulking on your couch. You think you’re only hurting yourself, but what if your mood spreads like wildfire? [Read: Why are girls so moody? 17 reasons and ways to help her deal with them]

Enter emotional contagion—the phenomenon where emotions and related behaviors can spread quickly among individuals. Your pent-up or repressed anger can negatively impact not only your mental well-being but also your relationships with those around you.

What Not to Do

So you’ve learned the potential risks of holding onto anger and some effective techniques for letting it go.

But before you go all in, let’s talk about a common myth people often fall for when trying to release anger or deal with repressed emotions. Spoiler alert: it’s not what you think, and it’s backed by science. [Read: 25 Ways to let go of resentment, stop feeling bitter, and start living]

1. Venting as a Myth

You’ve probably heard the advice, “Just let it all out, scream into a pillow or punch a bag to feel better.” Sounds satisfying, doesn’t it? Well, it’s time for a reality check.

This belief aligns with the Catharsis Theory, which suggests that releasing aggressive energy through action or fantasy reduces anger. However, contemporary research suggests the opposite.

Studies have shown that venting can actually escalate feelings of anger and aggression, rather than dissipate them. So, when it comes to how to release anger or manage repressed anger, venting might just be fanning the flames.

2. Suppressing Emotion

Many people think bottling up their anger is the adult thing to do. Well, think again. Research has shown that suppressing emotions can lead to an increased risk of cardiovascular diseases and could even lower your life expectancy.

Suppressing anger is especially detrimental, as it can turn into repressed anger, lurking beneath the surface and causing even more harm long-term. [Read: Silent treatment in a relationship – why it hurts and 37 must-knows to handle it]

3. Indulging in Negative Self-talk

Sometimes, when we’re angry, it’s easy to get into a loop of negative self-talk. You might find yourself ruminating on the things that made you angry in the first place or even blaming yourself for feeling that way.

The issue here is that negative self-talk reinforces feelings of anger and might contribute to a negative emotional spiral, supported by cognitive psychology research on “automatic thoughts.”

4. Social Media Rants

Ah, the temptation to vent your frustrations in 280 characters or less can be enticing. While it might feel good in the moment, public venting rarely leads to a solution and can often make the situation worse. [Read: Social media addiction – the 16 alarming symptoms and how to break out]

Plus, a study on emotional contagion in digital platforms found that negative emotions can spread more quickly than positive ones, meaning your rant could have a broader emotional impact than you intended.

5. Overreliance on Alcohol or Substances

Sometimes people turn to alcohol or other substances as a way to “numb” their emotions. While this might offer a temporary reprieve, substances don’t address the underlying issue and can lead to dependency and other health risks.

Adopt Healthier Ways to Manage Your Feelings

We can’t stress enough how vital it is to adopt healthier ways to manage your feelings. Just think of it as an investment in your future self: a future where you’re not only happier but also healthier, both emotionally and physically.

[Read: 29 Red flags to tell if someone wants to hurt you and harm you emotionally]

So, the next time anger starts to build, take a deep breath and remember that you have a toolkit of effective, science-backed methods at your disposal for how to release anger. Your body, your mind, and everyone around you will thank you. And hey, your future self is already giving you a high five!

The post Repressed Anger: 22 Healing Ways to Release Anger & Focus on the Positives is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.