How to Seduce a Woman with Words and Leave Her Weak in the Knees

If you’re terrible at speaking to women, you need to learn the tricks of the trade when it comes to how to seduce a woman with words alone.

You would think that speaking to a woman would be an easy task. You’re a human, she’s a human, surely you can interact on that basis alone? You would think… but it’s not always the case. Which is why you find yourself wondering how to seduce a woman with words and not come across as a bumbling mess.

Some people find it difficult to speak to women without turning into one. Others are even worse at seducing a woman through words alone.

If you’re one of those people, take heart! You’re not alone. Countless people have this same issue, but it’s important to realize that the key to speaking to a woman and getting a positive response, really does align with the words you say and how you say them.

My best piece of advice

If you want to know how to seduce a woman with words, I’ll give you one useful piece of advice: be genuine.

As a woman, there is nothing worse than someone trying to be something they’re not. I hate it, and I think I speak for most other women too. You can see through it so easily. It’s shallow, to put it bluntly.

[Read: How to be likable without changing who you are]

Of course, this lack of genuineness could be down to nerves, something we can all understand. The problem is, how can you expect to seduce a woman with just the power of words, if you cannot be yourself?

For me, the sexiest thing is someone who is comfortable in their own skin, and if you can make me laugh, even better.

How to seduce a woman with words in eight easy steps

So, if you want to know how to seduce a woman with words, here are my ideas and experiences.

#1 Always be honest. Why would you try and be someone you’re not? It’s really annoying and we can see through it easily. While you might wonder why being genuine is going to seduce someone, remember that being genuine means you’re building a bond of trust, and that’s one of the sexiest things to a woman!

Yes, flashiness and cockiness might be alluring at first, but if you want to seduce this woman over the long-term, and avoid quick hook ups, being yourself is always the way forward. [Read: How to successfully pass a shit test from a woman]

#2 Avoid sarcasm. Sarcasm is funny, I’ll admit that, but not everyone ‘gets it’. And if you’re trying to seduce a woman who doesn’t really see the funny side of sarcasm, you’re more likely to offend her than get her attention in a positive way.

Instead, stick to observations, throw in witty one liners and compliment her. These are all far more effective than sarcasm, which can come at a later date, once you’ve got to know her a little better. [Read: How to make a girl smile, laugh and like you instantly]

#3 Use the power of humor. I know I’m not able to speak for all women on the planet, but I know I’m speaking for many when I say that the key to seduction is in humor. Personally, make me laugh and you’ve got me hook, line, and sinker!

This doesn’t mean throwing in all your best jokes as though you’re doing a stand up routine. It means using humor here and there to make the conversation fun, light, and above all else, downright sexy in an indirect way! [Read: How you can use humor to win her over]

#4 Check your body language. It’s not all about what you say, it’s about how you say them and the way your body speaks to her too. Learning how to seduce a woman with words is about what your body is saying. Mirror her, making sure your body language isn’t closed or defensive. Then throw in the odd flirtatious look, light touch on the arm, or joking nudge, which has seduction written all over it! [Read: 14 moves to make a girl sexually desire you]

#5 If you’re nervous, say so. Alongside honesty, one of the best ways to seduce a woman is by admitting your nerves. Yes, confidence is sexy. But it shows you’re human to say that you’re nervous, and it’s also ultra-flattering. If someone is a little nervous to speak to you, that’s got to make you feel good, right? [Read: Girls spill on what are the manliest and unmanliest things a guy does]

#6 Don’t go over the top. It’s important that you know when the conversation is finished. It’s a little like a joke which is funny at first, but when you explain it too many times, it loses it’s shine and it’s no longer amusing. Short and sharp is far better than long and drawn out if you want to understand how to seduce a woman with words.

Leave her wanting more! Leave her wondering when she’s going to see you again. She won’t be able to resist!

#7 Pay attention to the tone of your voice. I mentioned checking the way your body was speaking to her a little earlier. You also should think about the way you’re speaking and not just the words you choose. If you want to seduce a woman, yes you should be genuine and add in some humor, but you also need to be a little sexy too!

This doesn’t mean talking like Barry White, but do keep your voice low, adding in a wry smile, and making sure your tone is controlled and even, and not shaking. [Read: 15 secrets of seduction to turn absolutely anyone on]

#8 Compliment her. Ah, the biggest one of the lot. If you want to seduce a woman with the power of your words, those words should be complimentary! This doesn’t mean  listing all her positive points and counting them on your fingers. Instead, make the odd complimentary remark about her hair, her clothes, how you admire the job she does, etc.

If you can make her feel like the most special woman alive in those short minutes you have a conversation, she’s certainly going to want to come back for more! [Read: The compliments for girls that she will love to hear]

Practice makes perfect!

The number one way to get all of these points right, in a subtle and genuine way, is to practice. Yes, that means plucking up the courage to speak to women randomly, and see what their reaction is. This doesn’t mean leading women on, I’d like to add. It means having general conversations and using what you experience as a learning curve. [Read: Conversation tips to seduce women with  the words you use]

Nobody is born with ease and charm. It is something developed over time. Yes, some people are more confident than others and that certainly helps, but it’s something you can fake, and the real confidence will grow from there.

The most important point to bear in mind is that the woman you’re trying to seduce is human! That means you can mess up occasionally. She is human and will also mess up! She’s probably just as nervous as you are, but you have to be the one to take control and steer the conversation if you want to successfully seduce her and leave her wanting more. This means another conversation, possibly a date. And who knows where it might lead from there.

Put simply, if you don’t try, you’re never going to know.

[Read: How to flirt with girls: The secret tips to make any girl fall for you]

Mastering how to seduce a woman with words is all about choosing your words carefully, knowing how to say them in the right way, and what to avoid saying. Stick to neutral topics, but always compliment her as much as you can, without going over the top. 

The post How to Seduce a Woman with Words and Leave Her Weak in the Knees is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Dating Checklist: How to Make One & Why It Can Benefit Your Life

Having a dating checklist may sound high maintenance, but is it actually beneficial to helping you find your ideal match?

What is a dating checklist? It is just like any other checklist. It is the list of the things you need. Your grocery checklist is what you need from the store, and a dating checklist is what you need from a partner.

Now, some people think having a dating checklist makes you picky. Some people would say it makes you snobby. But, I say, it is a solid way to make sure you’re not settling, in most cases. [Read: Should you settle for less when you can have so much more?]

Should you have a dating checklist?

Not everyone needs a dating checklist, but it definitely has its benefits. If you find yourself in a pattern of dating people who are totally wrong for you, a dating checklist can help to guide you in the right direction.

If you can identify the qualities of your exes that led to the breakup, you can work from there when listing what you need from a partner.

But, keep in mind that if you make a dating checklist that it is not set in stone. It is only a guide to remind you of the qualities you think best suit you. And it doesn’t have to be a checklist of qualities in a partner.

A dating checklist can consist of qualities your partner brings out in you. It can contain what you need from the relationship as a whole. And it can contain how your partner should make you feel.

[Read: How to find your soulmate: 30 practical tips to keep you from giving up]

I know making a checklist for dating can sound critical and take the romance out of the equation, but in fact, it can be quite the opposite.

When you know that someone ticks off all the things you need from a relationship, you can focus on the good parts. You can enjoy the passion and romance because you don’t have to worry about things that may have caused rifts in the past.

But, be aware that a dating checklist is not a cure for breakups. It will not make your relationship perfect or prevent arguments, nor can it help you not repeat past mistakes. It can guide you in the right direction, but it will only help you if you are realistic about it. [Read: 15 signs of a healthy relationship you should always look for]

What should you have on your dating checklist?

A dating checklist is only useful if it is realistic and practical. It should contain things like someone reliable or open-minded. These should not be things like someone who’s six feet tall or makes six figures a year.

A dating checklist should be helpful and bendable, not harsh and specific. You are not picking a car, you are picking a life partner. People are complicated and constantly changing. You can require heated seats, a sunroof, and good gas mileage in a car, but a dating checklist needs to be made for people.

This about your deal breakers that will truly affect your potential future with someone.

[Read: 10 relationship deal breakers to watch out for]

Do you only see yourself with someone that shares your religious beliefs? Would it never work out between you and a climate change denier? Do you know you want kids in your future?

Look back on your past relationships. I know I’ve had bad experiences with guys who claim to not be feminists. It tends to lead to disrespect, emotional abuse, and the loss of my confidence. Therefore, moving forward, my checklist would contain someone that respects everyone equally, no matter their differences.

The same goes for smoking. I have lost many people in my life due to lung disease, and it is something I could not handle again. So a non-smoker would be on my checklist. But, with all of that, you should be able to make compromises.

For instance, I would date a former smoker, just not someone who currently smokes or plans to in the future. A dating checklist should contain things that are truly important to you but are not unbendable. [Read: Starting a new relationship? Your checklist to a happy romance]

At one point I had said I could only date a guy who had sisters because every guy I’d dated who didn’t have any were misogynists, but that is a prejudgment. You have to be able to bend and change. You may not be able to picture yourself with someone younger than you or from a different background but that could be what’s perfect for you.

In case you have no idea where to start, here are some things to consider putting on your dating checklist.

#1 Religious beliefs. This is not something everyone needs to agree on, but if your religion is highly important to you and having someone share your beliefs is vital, that maybe something to consider. 

#2 Political stance. Again, there are plenty of opposing political opinions in successful relationships, but if focusing on climate change or women’s rights is part of your daily life, dating someone opposed to that would not make sense for you.

#3 Wanting kids. I know it is awkward to talk about this early on when dating, but it is something a lot of people don’t talk about until they’ve already committed. Differing stances can cause resentment or a painful breakup. [Read: 20 questions to ask your love and learn everything you need to know]

#4 Willingness to move. If you are happy where you are with no desire to move for work or for your partner, dating someone that moves every year may not be something you’re willing to do.

#5 Ability to openly communicate. In my book, this should be on everyone’s dating checklist. Being able to communicate about the good and bad stuff is vital to the success of any relationship. Of course, people can grow and improve on this, but requiring some sort of communication is important.

#6 Physical compatibility. This is not something you need from the first date. It can grow over time and be even better when it grows rather than having major chemistry off the bat. But intimacy is important to romantic relationships and seeing the potential for it is something to consider. [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly]

#7 Lifestyle. We do tend to meet people who share lifestyles similar to us, but that is not always the case. Sure, opposites can make it work, but as a homebody would you want to date someone who goes to clubs every night and vice versa? This is definitely something that can be compromised on, but not for everyone.

#8 Sense of humor. Humor gets us through so much in life: every day monotony, hardships, trauma. Humor cheers us up and brings joy to everyday. If you and your partner can’t laugh or relax in that way, it could bring a lot of stress and tension to a relationship. [Read: The 12 types of humor and how it affects relationships]

Expectations of a dating checklist

Creating a dating checklist needs to always be about remaining openminded and accepting. Yes, we should all have standards and feel good about sticking to them. We also have to be able to see the bigger picture and know the difference between requirements we know we deserve and things that we can adjust to.

Straying from your checklist is important. It is not like sticking to your itinerary.

Your expectations of having and following a dating checklist should be guidance and knowing your worth. This checklist should remind you that you are worthy of someone that puts in the effort and treats you as an equal. [Read: 12 relationship boundaries new couples must draw early on]

It should guide you to someone that respects your time and energy and appreciates your company. Don’t let it close you off to opportunities for happiness and branching out of your comfort zone.

It shouldn’t limit you to a “type” of person, but to the level of trust in your potential relationships and yourself. It should remind you not to settle for less than you deserve, but to compromise.

[Read: Why going low only leads to lousy relationships]

Having a dating checklist is something that can guide you to romantic happiness. With the wrong mindset, it can hold you back. So, before making one, remember how it should be used.

The post Dating Checklist: How to Make One & Why It Can Benefit Your Life is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

What You Need to Do When Your Boyfriend Doesn’t Make Time for You

If your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you and is always busy, how are you supposed to react? Refrain from calling him your boyfriend, maybe?

It’s all about priorities, people. If your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you, the bottom line is that you’re not at the top of his priority list.

A relationship needs three things to function properly: love, trust, and attention.

If you get the love and you trust your partner, can you overlook a lack of attention?

No.

What is a relationship if you don’t spend time together? Is it really a strong union if your boyfriend is never there for you when you need him, or when you simply want to see him?

[Read: The 15 signs he’s ready for a relationship and the subtle hints he’s not]

Am I overreacting?

Now, you might think I’m coming on a little strong here, but I share from personal experience. I had a relationship which was great in many ways, but in other ways, not so great. My boyfriend at the time simply didn’t seem to understand balance.

For instance, I would spend time with friends, family, and him. I would do it equally to ensure that nobody felt left out and also to give me equal amounts of time with everyone I loved and cared about.

The ex? Not so much. He thought spending time with friends was more important than anything in the world, to the point where I was often sent a text cancelling a night out, while he was off enjoying conversation with his buddies.

Put simply, it’s a case of relationship neglect. [Read: How to stop feeling neglected by the one you love]

What should you do if your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you?

There are a few ways you can tackle this problem. Firstly, ask yourself whether this is an ongoing issue or something which has only just started to happen. If it’s recent, is there a reason for it? Maybe a friend is going through a hard time, or a family member is demanding a little attention and he feels bad about not seeing them as much as he used to. Maybe he simply doesn’t realize that he’s doing.

In this case, either wait it out a little and see if things change, or sit down and talk about it.

Personally, I have never been known for my patience so I would certainly initiate a conversation. It’s normal to feel left out when your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you. Of course you’re going to want to highlight the problem and work out what the issue is. [Read: How to help a selfish boyfriend find balance and change for the better]

Now, a word of warning here. This tactic could be a little gung-ho if it has literally been once or twice when your boyfriend has been a little less than available or has cancelled on you. We’re all allowed to have busy lives on occasion, and it could very well be that he’s busy at work. I wouldn’t advise sitting down and talking about things if it’s literally been only a couple of times.

However, if you’ve been lacking attention for a while, tackle the problem proactively.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that sometimes men don’t always realize what they’re doing. I don’t mean to sound negative or particularly nasty here, but from my experience, most men are laid back and don’t always understand what effect their actions have. It is likely that your guy just hasn’t even noticed what he’s doing. Is that an excuse? No, but give him the chance to rectify it, and he will probably prove you wrong. [Read: How to get your boyfriend’s attention when he’s ignoring you]

If not, well, it’s time to ask yourself whether you always want to be a lower priority than everyone else.

Remind him what he’s missing

Another tactic is to make him see exactly what he’s missing out on. Most guys are oblivious to what is going on until it’s in their face. Go out with you friends a little more, post it on social media, and show that you’re having a ball.

This doesn’t mean you do anything bad, you’re simply having a good time with your friends. Why should you sit around waiting for someone who isn’t giving you the attention you deserve? Yes, it a game. Sometimes we play games to regain the attention of someone who is being a little dumb in the love stakes.

The chances are that by being unavailable sometimes, he’ll wonder what’s going on. You’re quite likely to then have a full inbox, several missed calls, and enquiries into what you’re doing tonight. Men work in predictable ways sometimes! [Read: Why do guys come back when you ignore them?]

Remember your worth

The flip side of this tactic is that you will boost your own confidence and remind yourself of your own self-worth. Nobody should sit around waiting for someone to deem them worthy of attention. It should be given without even asking. When your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you, he’s basically telling you that other things are more important, and that shouldn’t be the case. [Read: How to pull back in a relationship when you’re giving too much]

Let’s be honest, nobody is that busy all the time. Sure, we go through busy times in life occasionally, but it’s transient. It passes and things go back to normal. If your boyfriend is constantly busy, he’s either super-successful and on the verge of overtaking the founder of Apple in the historical entrepreneur stakes, or he’s just not bothered about making time for you.

It’s harsh to hear, I know, but not making time for someone and failing to rectify the situation when they bring it up, is a message in itself. [Read: Can you actually fix a one-sided relationship before it ends in failure?]

Could it be time to say goodbye?

I don’t like to dwell on negatives, but if you’ve tried several tactics and still not getting attention, it could be time to wave goodbye. Go and find yourself another boyfriend who gives you the time and attention you deserve. [Read: How to make a guy realize he’s losing you – 13 hints that work]

Like I said earlier, a relationship requires three things to function. Love, trust, and attention. It’s like a car in many ways. When one wheel falls off, the whole thing tips to one side and doesn’t work. The engine might still run, but it’s not going anywhere. That’s the reality of a relationship lacking quality time over the long-term.

You see, relationship loneliness is a real thing. It’s why I waved goodbye in the end. There comes a point when your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you over a long period, and you wonder what you’re doing. You see couples around you going out for dinner, spending time together and laughing, and you feel jealous. [Read: 13 needy signs you’re too available for your partner]

You can have that, you just need to have it with someone else in this case. If he isn’t going to give you want you need, then he really doesn’t care enough. It’s not about being busy or feeling stressed, and it’s not about a million other excuses he might come up with. If your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you, especially after you ask him to, the relationship is as mobile as a car with one wheel missing.

[Read: The 16 signs to understand when someone is using you]

When your boyfriend doesn’t make time for you, it can be upsetting. Sure, it happens from time to time, and nobody is perfect either. If it’s a constant deal you seriously need to think about whether you’re in the right relationship.

The post What You Need to Do When Your Boyfriend Doesn’t Make Time for You is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

4 Common Sticking Points in Learning Any Skill

When we’re stuck short of realizing our desires, it’s often hard to figure out why we aren’t moving, especially when our sticking points come from within.

When you are trying to learn an epic new skill like seduction, you’re inevitably going to experience sticking points.

A sticking point is a spot in your journey you can't past unless something changes. It’s like heavy mud on your boots, keeping you from moving forward.

Contents

I. You Have the Power

II. Sticking Points

1. Limiting Beliefs
2. Plateaus
3. Consistency
4. Validation

But it can still be confusing as to what a sticking point entails. For example, if you’re from Pakistan and you want to live in London, but you can’t get past the bureaucracy to obtain a travel visa, this isn’t a sticking point. If, however, you obtained a visa but have a deep fear of flying keeping you from traveling, this is a sticking point.

If you want to meet a girl you like, but she won’t reply to your texts, this isn’t a sticking point. If you have her contact info, but you don’t know what to text her, this is. You can always improve your skill with texting, but you can’t force a girl to reply.

So, how does one identify and get past sticking points? How does one come to find themself on the other side of personal obstacles and achieve their goals?

How to Live with a Narcissist: 15 Crucial Tips to Help You Survive

It’s not always easy to pack your bags and leave when you realize just who you’re living with. Until you can move, here’s how to live with a narcissist.

When you have to live with someone who’s a narcissist, it’s not easy. Many people will tell you to leave the situation, but it’s not always so cut and dry. If your partner, roommate, or a family member is a narcissist, other issues play a role. Maybe you want to leave, but the timing is off. If so, you must learn how to live with a narcissist.

These tips will help you keep your cool and bring more balance in your life. If you’re stressing out over living with a narcissist, you can make the situation better.

How to live with a narcissist

A couple of my friends had siblings that weren’t clinically diagnosed as narcissistic; however, it was pretty clear what they were suffering from. The thing is back then, we were thirteen and didn’t have many living options.

[Read: How to deal with a narcissist? Learn to manipulate them back]

Their parents didn’t believe them when they would complain about their narcissistic brother or sister. If anything, it pushed everyone else to side with their sibling, which left many of my friends feeling helpless. What other options did they have? They weren’t going to pack their bags and move out of their homes. They had nowhere to go.

Sometimes, you have no choice but to learn how to live with a narcissist. So, follow these 15 tips to help you handle the circumstances until you find a better solution.

#1 Accept who they are. If you’re planning on trying to change them, think again. They are who they are, and this is something you’ll need to accept. If you’re trying to get them to see the light, it’s not going to happen. Accept that this person is narcissistic. By accepting who they are, you’ll be able to handle the situation without trying to “fix” them. [Read: How to recognize and stop selfish people from hurting you]

#2 Stop focusing on them. When someone is a narcissist, they crave attention. The thing is you seem to be giving them what they want. When this happens, you push aside your own needs and make them a priority. To deal with a narcissist, stop giving them the attention they want. Make sure your needs are fulfilled first and foremost.

#3 Create firm boundaries. The reason they’re getting away with their behavior is that you give into what they want. But this is when you need to create firm boundaries. There are some things you’ll be willing to do, but then there are some that aren’t negotiable. Create a line for yourself that cannot be crossed. [Read: How to say no and stop all the people pleasing]

#4 Speak up. You have a voice; they just haven’t heard it… yet. Of course, there are some things that aren’t worth arguing over, but when a narcissist has crossed the line, they need to be told. Don’t get upset or flustered. If you want to know how to live with a narcissist without losing your mind, keep your cool and let them know where your boundaries are. 

#5 Know when you’re being gaslighted. This is one of the oldest tricks in the book for narcissists, and they work every time. Gaslighting is when someone says something, but then later denies what they said or claims they said something else. “Are you crazy?” or “I didn’t say that, you’re insane,” are common sentences they’ll use to make you think you’re the one who got it wrong. [Read: 14 signs a narcissist is gaslighting and playing games with your mind]

#6 They will push back. You’re going to speak up, tell them where the boundaries are, but don’t expect them to go along with it. They will push back because narcissists need to be in control of everything. They’ll try every trick in the book to get you to falter, but stand your ground and stay strong.

#7 Work on your self-esteem. With narcissists, they know the people around them well and use their weaknesses to take advantage. When living with a narcissist, you need to be strong in yourself and work on your self-esteem. Spend more time practicing self-care and surround yourself with supportive people.

#8 Have a good support system. Living with a narcissist isn’t easy, but when you have a strong support system around you, it’ll help you significantly. Don’t make the mistake of isolating yourself from friends and family. Rather, do the opposite. Talk to your friends and family about what’s going on, and ask for professional help if you need it. [Read: Good friends are like stars: How to build lasting friendships]

#9 Make them take action. A narcissist will tell you they’ll do everything later, but you don’t want it done later. You need them to take action now. If they make a promise, have them fulfill it immediately, not in two or three days. Narcissists love to make promises and never keep them.

#10 Become a good negotiator. When it comes to narcissism, it’s tricky. You must become a good negotiator because they’re going to try and control the situation. Don’t assume that every time they push back, you should give in. They’re willing to negotiate as well, so give them the chance to make a deal.

#11 Be safe. By creating boundaries, you decide for yourself what’s safe and what’s not. If you feel you’re in an unsafe position, don’t assume things will get better because they won’t. Remove yourself from the situation and get into a safe space to figure out your next step. 

#12 Keep your cool. Narcissists work off of emotions, so the best thing you can do for yourself is to keep your cool. Don’t fall into their emotional trap because they will try that trick on you. Express your feelings, ask for an apology, and move forward. There’s no reason to fight with a narcissist; you’re not going to win. [Read: Narcissistic supply – How to stop giving a narcissist what they want]

#13 Don’t take it personally. A narcissist is never thinking about you, so don’t take this personally. For them, they’re focused solely on themselves, and you’re just one of the many pawns they’ll try to use along the way. Whatever they do towards you has nothing actually to do with you.

#14 Get out of the situation. Not all of us can pack a bag and go; I understand that. But if the situation is getting out of control and you’re not able to improve it, try to find an alternative solution. If your roommate is a narcissist, look for another place. If you can’t move, seek professional help. [Read: Here’s how to get a narcissist to walk out of your life]

#15 They may need professional help. You can do everything on this list to help yourself live with a narcissist, but understand that they probably need professional help. Of course, they don’t see they have a problem, but they usually have other issues such as substance abuse or personality disorders. Suggest *when the time is right* they seek professional help.

[Read: How to let go of the guilt and finally start living for yourself]

Even though you want to stay as far away as you can from a narcissist, sometimes it’s not as easy as one, two, three. But try these tips, and they’ll help you know how to live with a narcissist.

The post How to Live with a Narcissist: 15 Crucial Tips to Help You Survive is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

20 Signs You’re Being Ghosted or Are On the Verge of Being Ghosted

Being ghosted sucks, not knowing whether you’re or not you’re actually being ghosted is worse. So, what are the signs you’re being ghosted?

As someone who has been ghosted more times than she would like to admit, I can say it is not something you see always coming. I’ve put together a list of the signs you’re being ghosted to help you know what’s happening… or not happening.

Sure, sometimes you get a feeling, but other times the rug is ripped right out from under you.

And then there are the times you think you’re being ghosted, but you were just jumping to conclusions.

When someone ghosts you, it isn’t always a slowing down of conversation. Sometimes ghosting really does come out of the blue. Other times you don’t even know if you’re being ghosted.

If you don’t know, how do you know what to feel? Should you be pissed at someone for blowing you off or just be bored because they are super busy? Are you overreacting or are your feelings and worries about being ghosted valid? [Read: Why do guys ghost? 15 real reasons why guys turn into cowardly pricks]

Are you about to be ghosted?

The signs you’re being ghosted differ from the signs you’re about to be ghosted. One tells you what is happening now while the other gives you a foreshadowing.

Now, there will not always be clear signs you’re being ghosted beforehand so you can prepare yourself, but when they are there, they help you handle the whole situation a heck of a lot better.

#1 You’re always texting first. Maybe at one point you talked nonstop, but if you find yourself always reaching out first, there is a reason. Even if they respond, they may just not be prepared to totally ghost yet. But, when someone wants to talk to you, they reach out. [Read: Calm steps to deal with the emotion of being ghosted]

#2 Their answers are brief. If they just barely answer, they are preparing to ghost. They may even be hoping that by slowly backing away, you’ll just get the picture and stop reaching out.

#3 The cuteness fades. When you first started talking, I bet the sparks flew. You were flirting with nonstop banter. But if the fun conversations ceased, and you’re left with the boring stuff, they are no longer interested. [Read: When a guy starts acting different – What you need to do about it]

#4 There are no endings to conversations. Remember when he used to say goodnight or try to stay awake to talk to you? Or when you would wake up to a “Good morning, beautiful,” text? Well, before he ghosts you, he’ll stop putting that effort in.

Conversations will die out but not in the normal way. They will die out because he won’t answer questions or respond regularly.

#5 He’s ghosted you before. If he ghosted you in the past and then came back to see if you were still available and you gave him another chance, he will most likely do it again. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you that guys rarely see their wrongdoings and come around.

What likely happened was he got dumped or ghosted by someone else and wanted to see if you were still interested purely to boost his fragile ego. He may even have disappeared for days before, but responded when you reached out so you forgot about it, but that was just his first attempt. [Read: Guys who ghost and come back – How to handle the zombies of dating]

#6 It was too good to be true. I hate to be so bitter because it would be nice if things that seemed too good to be true were just true. Usually, they aren’t. If everything felt too perfect right off the bat, it’s probably because it was.

You didn’t just meet a guy who agrees with you about everything and wants all the same things in life. He was probably lying, but will soon decide it’s not worth it.

#7 You told him you’re a slow mover. This is when I often get ghosted. Honestly, I think it is a good way to weed out the decent guys from the ghosters. As soon as you say anything about being a slow mover intimately, he may back off.

This means he was probably only looking for one thing anyway, so it’s good you learned that now. [Read: 15 signs he just wants sex and is only using you]

#8 Plans are canceled or never even made. I know long-term boyfriends ghost, but it is definitely most common after one date or no dates at all. I cannot even count how many times I chatted with someone for weeks intimately only for us to never even meet.

If you make plans, but things never line up, and he never initiates a date, he is probably going to ghost you.

#9 You’re ghosted a lot. I hate that this is true, but it is. If you have been ghosted before or even ghosted regularly, it is likely to happen again.

Even though we hate the feeling, we are attracted to or at least comfortable with the same types of people. That means, unfortunately, ghosts are our type.

#10 You just feel it. Sometimes your gut, intuition, or whatever you call it just sets off an alarm. [Read: Haunting vs. ghosting and why haunting is so much worse]

Obvious signs you’re being ghosted already

If you noticed the previous signs, you probably already know what’s about to happen. If everything seemed fine until now, you probably feel super confused.

Is he ghosting you or is he busy? Is he ghosting you or did he fall down a manhole? If these things are happening, I am sorry to say, you are being ghosted.

#1 He hasn’t reached out in days. This is one of those telltale signs you’re being ghosted. If you haven’t heard from him with all the forms of communication there are nowadays, it isn’t because he can’t reach out. He just isn’t interested. [Read: 15 ways to ghostbust a ghoster like a real badass]

#2 He hasn’t responded to your texts. Sure, sometimes people are busy and overwhelmed and don’t initiate texts. But if he doesn’t respond when you text him, that is another sign you’re being ghosted. Everyone looks at their phone at least a few times a day. He definitely saw your message.

#3 He blocked or unfriended you on social media. In this age, when someone doesn’t respond to our texts, it is pretty easy to tell if they’re online elsewhere. But, if for some reason he disappeared off your feed, he’s unfriended you, not because he went on a social media hiatus.

#4 He’s still active online. In the case that he didn’t care enough to block you, he is still online but blatantly ignoring you without even trying to hide it.

#5 You’re left on read. This one is a real punch to the gut. We can always come up with some reason why he hasn’t texted back or reached out, but once you’re left on read, you can’t really think it is anything but a ghosting. [Read: What does it mean when someone’s ignoring texts on purpose?]

#6 Flashing ellipses. I’m sure you, like me, have read a text and forgot to respond. But, if you send him a text and he reads it, and you see those three little flashing ellipses but no actual answer, that is the kiss of death.

#7 You’re making excuses. When ghosted, it is nearly impossible to not make excuses. If you don’t, you just feel like it is something you did or said. By making excuses, we hold onto just a touch of hope. I get it, but if you must make excuses for why he isn’t reaching out, he is ghosting you.

#8 You don’t want to admit it to your friends. I hate this part. You told your friend about this guy you’re excited about. When they ask how it’s going, you feel ashamed and embarrassed to tell them that you haven’t heard from him.

If you feel hesitant to tell your friends what’s going on or even feel the need to lie or exaggerate the truth, he is ghosting you. You just don’t want to admit it.

#9 You want answers. Being ghosted will overload your mind. You will ask yourself all sorts of questions about why this is happening. If you don’t wonder about it, either you have killer confidence or he isn’t ghosting you. [Read: 5 signs of ghosting and 5 ways to deal with it]

#10 You can’t decide what to do. It is hard to be ghosted. You cling to the hope that he’ll text you, apologizing about losing his phone. But you are also pissed that he could be ghosting you. You don’t know whether to move on or wait and see.

The reason you don’t know how to feel or what to do is because you don’t know what’s happening now. I do. You’re being ghosted.

[Read: Why being ghosted hurts so much and what you need to do about it]

I’m sorry to be the one to guide you to the answer, but these are the signs you’re being ghosted. They are pretty much indisputable.

The post 20 Signs You’re Being Ghosted or Are On the Verge of Being Ghosted is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

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