Friday, 2 April 2021

30 Flirty, Fun Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend & Learn His Secrets

Sometimes asking silly questions can help you to get to know each other better. Not sure where to start? Try these 30 fun questions to ask your boyfriend!

There is nothing more fun than the “getting to know you” phase. If you feel like things have gotten somewhat stale and you’re running out of subjects to cover, fear not. These fun questions to ask your boyfriend can help you discover all the things that you don’t know about each other yet.

Whether you’ve been together for two months or 20 years, there are likely many stories that you haven’t heard that just take a little prying to get to. We all know how happy guys can be when they get to tell stories of their old days! These 30 fun questions to ask your boyfriend will get him thinking about a simpler time, laughing about the things he used to do, or even remembering the things that he felt the first time he laid eyes on you.

If you’re looking for other questions to ask your boyfriend, just use any of these links to ask your boyfriend all the right questions you have in mind.

Super cute questions to ask your boyfriend and snuggle up

Very deep questions to ask your boyfriend before getting closer

Serious questions to ask your boyfriend to form a real close bond

What-if questions that’ll make your man think and love you more

Fun questions to ask your boyfriend in a casual setting

Now, on to the fun questions to ask your boyfriend. The key here is to keep it light and to have fun with it. We all know that men hate being given the first degree, so make sure that what you’re asking won’t send up a red flag. Instead, you want to elicit a lighthearted, non-agenda response.

#1 What did you think about me when you first saw me? It’s funny when you think back to what your first impressions were of each other. He may have seen you and thought, “That is the girl I’m going to marry.” Finding out what it was about you that made him want to see you again might even help to spark some of those old feelings when things get a bit drab.

[Read: Love at first sight and the dreamy signs it’s very real]

#2 Did you have an imaginary friend as a child? What type of friendships did he have? Was he a social butterfly, or more of the shy, silent type?

#3 Who was your favorite superhero? Every superhero has their own cool thing. What is it that he wishes he could do for the world?

#4 What was your dream car growing up? Was he all about the muscle car, the speed and sexiness of the Lamborghini, or did he simply want the new Mazda that his dad brought home in second grade?

#5 What is your most embarrassing moment? If he’s willing to share his most embarrassing and vulnerable moments when you ask your boyfriend these fun questions, you may gain some real perspective about who he is from those experiences.

[Read: 15 awkward questions guys wish they could ask girls]

#6 What is your greatest accomplishment? Find out what he values in life by asking what he thinks he has contributed the most to the world.

#7 What was your first memory? What are the things that stick with him? If he remembers only the terrible things, he is likely more of a pessimist. But if he remembers that he won a drawing contest, he may celebrate his accomplishments most. Or If he remembers the look on his mom’s face when she was happy about something he did, that may mean he is more sensitive than you think.

[Read: How to think positive and reprogram your mind to become a more positive person]

#8 Who was your first crush? The first crush a guy has can shape not only the women that he chooses in the future, but also the way that he enters a relationship later in life.

#9 What did you want to be when you grew up? We all wanted to be something when we were little, yet many of us don’t end up going through with it. Use this fun question to ask your boyfriend to find out what he wanted to be when he was young. This will even tell you whether he’s more of a pragmatist or if he’s willing to dream outside of the box.

#10 Did you like school? Some people thrive in a classroom environment, whereas others favor more active, hands-on learning. Find out which way your guy leans with this question.

#11 What was your favorite movie as a kid? Was he more of a fantasy guy, a slasher lover, or a regular comedian? What entertains him the most? Does he want to laugh, cry, be inspired, or be scared out of his wits?

[Read: What are you passionate about? How to find and own your true desires]

#12 If you could have any superpower, what would it be? And would he use his powers for good or evil…?

#13 How long did you believe in Santa? How naive was he growing up? How long you believe in Santa not only speaks to the type of innocence he has, but it also says a lot about his gullibility and tender side.

#14 Did girls ever make you nervous? Was he a ladies’ man from the get-go or more of the silent observer type? Usually, a boy who is comfortable around girls remains that way. A man who’s more reserved may have a harder time communicating his feelings.

[Read: The 20 cutest, most adorably awkward moments we all go through in a new relationship]

#15 Were you an early or late bloomer? Puberty is very unkind to most of us. If you grew really tall too fast, you felt awkward. Yet, if you were the runt of the group, you had something to prove.

#16 What was your favorite song in high school? Was he the Dead Head wannabe, the grudge guy, the Slim Shady, or the pop star? Music is very subjective, so this fun question to ask your boyfriend can say a lot about your personality style.

#17 Were you ever a momma’s boy? Momma’s boys normally don’t change. Even if he is one, if he can at least admit it to himself, chances are more likely that he’ll have a better handle on controlling relationship issues that may stem from this trait.

[Read: Avoid them like the plague: 16 types of guys not to date]

#18 What did you earn your first trophy for? Was he a super athlete, or did he earn his trophies by participation?

#19 Who taught you about the birds and the bees? Where did he get his information from about what a relationship is about? If he learned it from his parents, he likely got the whole “respect” talk. If he learned it in the locker room, he probably learned that it’s all about the “scoring.”

[Read: Losing your virginity and having sex for the first time]

#20 When did you have your first drink? More adventurous people might have their first risk-taking behavior early on. If he’s still waiting for his first beer, then you know he doesn’t like to play with fire and does things by the book.

#21 Did you ever have a summer love? Summer loves are different from other types. They’re the ones that you fall head over heels for, throw abandonment to the wind, and blow your friends off for. Has he ever just let go and given all that he has to a short-term love affair?

[Read: 13 things a boyfriend MUST do if he wants to prove his worth to you]

#22 What’s your favorite meal? Is he a meat and potatoes kind of guy, or does he like a good soul food?

#23 What is it about a house that makes it feel like home to you? Does he feel attached to things and physical locations, or the people in them? If home is where his family is, he more easily bonds to people he loves. If home is an address, he considers home a structurally safe dwelling, regardless of the inhabitants inside.

[Read: 14 undeniable signs he wants to spend his life with you]

#24 Was it hard moving away from home? Was he a homebody or someone who was ready to leave the nest and set the world on fire?

#25 If you could spend the night with anyone, real or fake, who would it be? Who is worthy of his time? If he could talk to anyone about anything, what knowledge would he want to gain?

#26 Who is your biggest hero? Is his hero someone they make comic books about, or his dad who puts on a suit every day and walks out of the door even when he doesn’t feel like it? Does he see spectacular in the everyday or in the extraordinary?

#27 When you’re gone, what do you want people to say about you? This is one of those fun questions to ask your boyfriend that’ll tell you a lot about the way he wants his life to turn out. What does he value in life and think is important to do while you’re here?

[Read: 22 early warning signs of a bad boyfriend all girls must look out for]

#28 Where do you see yourself when you are 70? What are his goals? Not just monetarily, but personally and emotionally?

#29 When will you think “I’ve made it”? At what point will he feel accomplished enough to say that he has everything he wants, that he couldn’t ask for anything more, or that he has done everything he’s set out to do?

#30 What is your best childhood memory? Does the memory focus around him and what he’s done, his friends and the time spent with them, or his family vacation that will live in his memory forever? [Read: How to understand a man and his mind]

These fun questions to ask your boyfriend aren’t just for amusement. Sometimes a simple question can give you insight into a person that you may not get from just asking a question point-blank. Use them to get to know the real person deep down inside!

The post 30 Flirty, Fun Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend & Learn His Secrets is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Be Careful Who You Trust: 15 Ways to Recognize the Backstabbers

Trust is very fragile, and once broken, it’s difficult to piece back together. To avoid the broken pieces, be careful who you trust in the first place.

Have you ever noticed that most kids will talk to just about anyone about anything. They’ll give out personal details about their life and tell their most intimate secrets—there really isn’t much that they hold back. Even if you tell them to be careful who they trust, it’s something that just flies off the top of their head!

As we grow older, though, we learn from experience that there are some people whom we can trust, and many, many others whom we can’t. Even in committed relationships like marriages, there are betrayals of trust that can throw you for a loop.

But the problem is that if we don’t learn to rely on others and find it in our hearts to love, survival is extremely difficult. There is nothing worse, however, than thinking that we can trust someone only to find that they have not earned it. When you feel betrayed, it’s nearly impossible to trust again. The key is not to make the same mistake twice.

[Read: The 15 signs of a bad friend to always be on the lookout for]

How to be careful of who you trust

Often, we think that the people we love will love us the same way and hold the same loyalty, but that is not always the case. No matter who you decide to confide in, there are 15 general rules that you can follow if you don’t want to end up embarrassed, disappointed, and let down.

#1 If they have done it in the past, they will do it again. If there is one thing that is true about human nature, and why you need to be careful who you trust, it’s because we are creatures of habit.

The saying, “Once a cheater, always a cheater” is normally very true. If someone has the propensity to betray your trust initially, there is really nothing stopping them from doing it again. Remember that not everyone deserves your trust.

[Read: Should you trust your gut? How to know when to listen to it or ignore it]

#2 Just because you wouldn’t betray their trust doesn’t mean that they will honor the same code. We often assume that we are like everyone else and live by the same rules. The older I get, the more I realize that the assumption I have that everyone thinks and feels the same way as me is entirely false.

If you have a set of rules for yourself, don’t ever make the false assumption that everyone else shares those same ethics and values. We all live by our own rules and moral codes.

#3 Secrets, secrets are no fun… Even if you think you’re telling someone something in confidence, keep in mind that the more secretive the subject is, the more likely it is to be spread. Be careful who you trust with your secrets. Some people can be very good at hiding their sneaky, backstabbing ways.

[Read: How to be a friend – The real art of building true and meaningful friendships]

#4 Don’t ever trust the “drama queen.” Be careful who you trust because the drama queen is more about the drama than being a friend. If she knows something juicy that will gain her attention simply from knowing *and spreading* the information, she will likely sell you out for the traction the story will gain her.

The drama queen usually can’t stop herself. She is completely unaware that what she is doing is hurting anyone. Using the guise of being concerned about you and trying to enlist people to help, there is normally nothing that is off limits. All it takes is a “bless your heart” and she can tell your deepest darkest secrets and make it sound like she is doing you the favor.

[Read: Attention seeking behavior and why some people always go looking for drama]

#5 If someone is talking badly to you about someone else, they are also talking badly about you to someone else. We all make the mistake of thinking that we are exempt from ugliness. Be very careful who you trust, especially when someone is badmouthing someone else. The truth is that if someone is betraying the trust of another person to you, they’re going to turn around and do the same to you.

They don’t have one set of rules for your friendship and then another for the person about whom they’re dishing to you. It’s just a matter of time before your secrets are being spilled out of their forked tongue. Don’t trust someone who can’t keep someone else’s secret; you are not that special.

#6 Trust is NOT a two-way street. Just because they trust you, that does not mean that you can trust them. If they have told you very secretive things in the past, don’t assume that means that you can tell them things. Some people know that by self-disclosing, they will gain entrance into your trust. Once there, they will tear you apart. Knowing that you are an honest person and will hold their secrets can be an even larger incentive for them to spill yours. [Read: How to build trust in a relationship and make it last]

#7 Don’t work under the assumption of innocence until proven guilty. If people are telling you about what someone is saying about you, listen. Most of us like to believe that we know better and don’t want to accept when someone tells us differently. Instead of just blindly believing, confront the person and think about things logically.

#8 Don’t be naïve. A lot of people are not inherently good. I hate to say it, but we all have an ugly streak so it’s very important to be careful who you trust and rely upon. Don’t be naive enough to think that you are exempt from being talked about just because you are an honest and good person. No one is free from ugliness, not even someone who doesn’t deserve it. [Read: How to stop selfish people from hurting you]

#9 Hold back those things about yourself that people don’t need to know. Before you have diarrhea of the mouth, consider whether you need to tell someone what you’re divulging to them. There are times when we need to vent, but you can still vent and leave certain things out. There have to be some things about yourself that you keep to yourself.

Being honest isn’t a requisite when what you have to say can come back to bite you. Be careful who you trust, and selective about the depth of what you tell someone about you, and if you would not want it to get out, keep it under wraps.

#10 Giving someone your darkest secrets doesn’t pull them closer. You aren’t going to form a closer bond with someone by telling them your deepest, darkest secret. If someone wants to form a close relationship with you, they don’t need to know that you wet the bed when you drink too much, or that you cheated on your boyfriend one time by mistake.

Self-disclosure, or confessing your sins to someone, does not make them feel any closer to you. In fact, secrets may make them uncomfortable around you and make them wish you had just kept things to yourself.

#11 Saying “I do” doesn’t always mean they do. When you say “I do,” that may not always mean, “I do promise to keep everything in our relationship between us.” Unfortunately, that may not be what the other person means when they say it.

Not all married people see the bond that they have as sacred and will have no problem discussing not only your problems, but your intimate confessions with those outside of the relationship. Marriage is not a promise of trust, but it sure would be nice if it were, wouldn’t it?

[Read: 15 cell phone rules all couples have to follow to build real trust]

#12 Don’t ignore the inner voice. If your inner voice is telling you not to trust someone or to hold back on information when talking, listen. There’s a reason why we have an inner voice. It was created to keep us from harming ourselves or making mistakes that come back to bite us. All too often, we ignore our intuition, and it turns out to be right.

[Read: How self respect affects you and your relationship]

#13 If it quacks and looks like a duck… it is a duck. Be realistic about who and what a person is. If you have given someone your trust and they broke it, no matter the excuse, don’t trust them again. There is never a reason to betray someone’s trust unless they come to you first and give you a heads up.

Even if you are in a position where you are going to hurt yourself and you confess it to someone, if they really care, they will come to you first and let you know that they are going to involve someone else. If they don’t at least give you the heads up, that just makes them a coward.

#14 Don’t give three strikes—one is normally plenty. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. And fool me three times? Well, I don’t even have any suggestion for that. That is purely just not caring enough about yourself to protect yourself from harm.

If someone has betrayed your trust once, you can’t ever trust them again. That is just the way that things are, whether you want to believe it or not. If they did it before, they will do it again. [Read: Should you forgive and forget? 15 guidelines to follow]

#15 If they aren’t sharing, neither should you. If someone isn’t telling you anything about themselves, that’s usually a sign that either they don’t care about what you have to say, or that they don’t care to hold your trust.

If they aren’t opening up to you, then what makes you think they want to hear about what you have to say, or that you should tell them anything intimate about you? You aren’t going to get them to open up if they haven’t already, and spilling your guts for their sake isn’t going to help.

[Read: How to stop being a doormat and feel in control again when people use you]

The best way to live life is by finding one person whom you know you can trust never to let you down, and be careful who you trust outside of that. If people aren’t asking, don’t tell. And for goodness sakes, remember, that if they’ve betrayed your trust before, they WILL do it again.

The post Be Careful Who You Trust: 15 Ways to Recognize the Backstabbers is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Thursday, 1 April 2021

Introducing... HomeDate: The Safe Dating Substitute

homedateIt’s 2021, and we’re still dating the old-fashioned (and very unsafe) way. It’s time to do things different. It’s time for HomeDate.

I know we're pretty far into the charisma-touch-lifestyle launch right now, but I just couldn't help announcing the progress on the secret 'skunk works' project we've had in the works since mid-last year.

It's just too juicy, and there are too many exciting things happening with it, for me to keep it to myself.

Quick cultural relevance recap: sometime during the Enlightenment, Western society decided its central value was that of liberty. Revolutions occurred, nations bled, and tens of millions lost their lives in pursuit of this ideal.

But recently we've realized liberty is actually a very dangerous concept. It isn't what we thought it was. That's why the new central value of Western society is safety.

All that liberty doesn't do you a whole lot of good when you're lying in the gutter, coughing up blood, dying of coronavirus, does it?

And as society's changed, Girls Chase has been under more and more pressure to change with it.

The fact is, it's not very safe to meet women these days.

You could catch a disease, like coronavirus, bird flu, hepatitis, or SARS.

You could be the victim of a hate crime, such as someone saying something mean to you.

You're forced to endure rejection, rudeness, and other unpleasantries that could lower your self-esteem. Meanwhile you risk inconveniencing others, who may not want your approach.

We have all this new technology progress has brought us.

So why are we still doing dating the old way?

Well, we listened to the market -- which has switched more and more away from bars, nightclubs, parties, and social events (most of which are illegal now in many places, anyway), to, instead, meeting via dating apps (which are now the #1 way people meet new partners, accounting for fully 19% of new relationships) -- and we've listened to our audience, who have increasingly told us we are "not with the times" for focusing so much on outdated in-person dating and not on apps.

I, personally, also realized which direction the market was heading in. And the fact is, you can't fight progress.

So, we went to the drawing board, put our thinking caps on, and cooked up something unlike anything the world's seen before.

We're calling it 'HomeDate', and it's the safe dating substitute that is going to totally change the way you (and everybody else on Earth) does dating and mating.



How to Get Over a Girl Who Doesn’t Like You Without Getting Bitter

Do you like a girl, and for some reason she doesn’t like you? Here’s how to get over a girl and transform yourself into a desirable catch at the same time!

When you start to like a girl, everything just feels better. The world looks more beautiful, there’s a skip in your step, and you’re just happy. But when she turns you down, everything goes from good to the bitter worst. Ever been there? Almost all of us have! As a right of passage, knowing how to get over a girl who doesn’t like you is something all of us need to learn.

And that’s where many guys go wrong, and this affects them for the rest of their lives. You can either choose to learn from your mistakes, heal, and become a better guy. Or you can choose to stay blind to your faults and assume the girl who turned you down is a real bitch! *just so you know, she probably isn’t!*

But let’s be honest, it’s so frustrating, isn’t it? I mean, you’re such a great guy and yet she’s interested in other guys who don’t seem even half as good as you! Ever been there?

Well, I have. I’ve been there plenty of times and I’ve learnt a few important lessons on that path too.

[Read: An attractive girl’s confession – Why are good looking girls so mean to guys?]

How to learn the right lessons and get over the girl at the same time

You’re here because you want to get over a girl who doesn’t like you back. But every time you get turned down, you’d feel just a bit worse about yourself. So here, we’re not going to just talk about how you can get over a girl, but also about how you can man up and learn from it. That way, you never have to experience the same kind of heartbreak and rejection ever again.

Of course, there will always be heartbreaks. They are inevitable. BUT as far as possible, you can avoid the same kind of mistakes, and get better every step along the way. So let’s get straight into where we guys go wrong, and how you can get over a girl, and be the awesome guy you were born to be!

[Read: 18 qualities of a great guy that sets him apart from lesser men]

How to get over a girl who doesn’t like you

Ever since my teenage years, I’ve fallen hard for quite a few girls. And every now and then, a girl that I liked would speak nicely to me, get friendly with me and then crush my heart when I ask her to go out with me.

I mean, these girls did say I was a nice guy. They would even compliment me all the time. And sometimes, I would even hear the dreaded lines, “why can’t more guys be like you” or “why can’t I find a guy like you…?” Really, I’m a guy like me!!

For a long time in my childhood years, when I did work up the courage to ask a girl out on a date, they would appear shocked or embarrassed and tell me that they never looked at me *that way*. Gosh, I HATED that feeling.

And once the proposal ends, the awkwardness begins. Things were never the same again with the girls I asked out. A few girls I liked stayed in touch as distant friends, while many girls started avoiding me.

The girls I liked moved on, and I was the one stuck with a heartbreak that I had to deal with. It was traumatic at times, because I never really got to know what was wrong with me or what was better with the other guys they seemed to like.

[Read: How to know for sure if a girl doesn’t like you – 25 subtle signs a guy should never ignore]

Where I went wrong in my pursuit of girls

As guys, we have epic egos. We think we’re all perfect definitions of the male species. But more often than not, many of us are flawed. So you think you’re a great guy. But does the world feel the same about you?

Would you consider yourself as one of the most desirable guys when you walk into any room? Does everyone else look up at you and your friends as the most popular guys around? When I was in college, I always thought my friends and I were really cool. But now when I look back at my college photos, I can see that I was a nice guy, but I was not as popular or cool as I had once assumed. *cringe!*

Sometimes, all of us need a reality check. If a girl you’ve fallen for likes another guy, don’t try convincing yourself that the world sucks because you’re a better guy. Try to see the other guy’s good side and see in what ways he’s better than you.

[Read: How to become a much better guy by using the right role models]

Sometimes we just have no choice if a girl doesn’t like us

In a completely different scenario, sometimes you just have no say if a girl doesn’t like you. There was this girl I liked a lot and she liked me too. We were friends, and we would flirt. We would go out on dates, hook up occasionally and kept things easy in the talking stage and friend stage. This continued for a few months and I started to fall for her. Around the same time, she met another guy whom she started talking to.

She would talk to him all the time and even make out with him. She’s single and she had every right to do whatever she pleased. But that made me jealous, and I wanted her to be all mine. I started telling her that I really liked her and wanted to be with her in a more-than-just-friends way. But the more I pursued her, the further away she drifted from me. And one fine day, she told me that she wanted to end things between us because she had started dating this other guy.

Apparently, she liked me a lot, but I just wasn’t the kind of guy she wanted to be in a relationship with. I was angry, bitter and sad. But to be fair to this girl, I wasn’t dating her and she had the choice to date anyone she liked. There was nothing I could do but move on.

[Read: What to do when a girl ignores you and won’t even give you a chance]

The lessons we can learn from our own heartbreaks

Now, there are lessons you can learn when you ask a girl out, when she turns you down, and when you work your way towards getting over her. If you do learn these lessons, you’ll definitely end up becoming a better guy who’s desired by girls, every step along the way.

The 6 lessons to remember in getting over a girl

In my failed romances and experiences with getting dumped by girls I hadn’t even dated, here are a few things I’ve learnt.

#1 A nice guy isn’t always a desirable guy. If she tells you you’re a nice guy, or that she loves spending time with you, it still doesn’t mean she wants to date you or sleep with you.

[Read: How to avoid the friend zone and make her desire you]

#2 If a girl flirts with you, it doesn’t mean she likes you. She may be attracted to you, but perhaps she has other reasons to not want to date you.

#3 We can all change our minds. One of the girls I liked was a good friend of mine. She would even say that she loved me. I was intensely attracted to her, but we weren’t dating yet. To the rest of the world, we were friends. But during our conversations late into the light, we spoke like lovers.

And just like that, one fine day, she just started avoiding me. And I had no idea why. She wouldn’t reason it out with me though. She just told me that our relationship was all wrong. We’re not friends anymore but I was still hooked to her. And to this day, I have no idea why she started ignoring me.

[Read: How to read mixed signals from a girl and turn it into something more]

#4 Life can be unpredictable and unfair. Deal with it. Sometimes, circumstances are beyond your control. The girl you like may be madly in love with another guy. Or she may already be dating someone else exclusively. Or there may be some other reason you’ll probably never know. Don’t go looking for closure because you’ll never get it. The only thing you need to remember here is this – What matters is that life is unpredictable and sometimes not in your favor, you just need to accept it.

#5 Preferences and choices. We all have our own choices in the kind of partner we like. The girl you like has a choice to turn you down. If a girl you find unsuitable asks you out, you may be flattered, but you’d still turn her down, wouldn’t you? Why is it wrong if the girl you like does the same to you?

#6 Learn to let go of your anger. You’re upset and angry. But that just won’t help you. Let go of the rage and move on. You win some and you lose some. Enjoy the game of life with no regrets or frustrations.

[Read: How to know if a girl is leading you on with no intention of ever dating you]

The 6 things to learn from a bad proposal

If you’ve asked a girl out and she turned you down, learn from the experience and see if there are any flaws about yourself you can pick from it. Perhaps, you were being hasty or pushy, or you still have a few personality flaws that need to be fixed. Here are 6 things you need to learn before trying to get over her.

#1 Don’t be hasty. Don’t rush in too fast in the heat of the moment. If you’re too easy to get or reveal just how much you LOVE a girl too soon, she may take you lightly and walk all over you.

[Read: How to pursue a woman and make the next move to completely win her over]

#2 What are your flaws? Every single guy in the world, even the best of smooth talkers, have a few flaws. When you look back at how you asked a girl out, remember the way she behaved initially and how she changed when you asked her out. Could you have changed something about the way you went about pursuing her or dating her?

#3 Build the tension. Never pop the question out of the blue. You like her, and she seems interested in you. Instead of looking for ways to let her know about the undying, everlasting love you have for her, look for ways to make the conversations and the relationship more exciting.

Make her go weak in her knees without letting her know how crazy you are about her. Make her fall for you even before you confess that you’re falling for her.

[Read: How to get a girl to like you – 20 things MUST know to win the odds]

#4 Always know the answer before you ask the question. This is a very important life lesson here. Don’t get into a fight you know you’ll lose. And don’t tell a girl you like her before you know her intentions about you. If you’ve already been on a few dates with her, there’s a good chance she likes you. But wait until you’re certain about her feelings before you reveal yours.

#5 Understand what turns her off. There are many things that turn a girl off. And many guys don’t know the things that matter to a girl. Find out the things that turn her off and avoid them. You need to be a great guy to get a great girl to fall for you.

#6 Become the guy all girls desire. There are a few traits about guys that all girls find irresistible. Become that perfect guy and all girls will like you as a friend and desire you as a lover. Be that guy and you’ll see how easy it is to get any girl you like.

[Read: What turns a girl on sexually or otherwise? 25 irresistible traits all girls desire]

How to get over a girl and move on

Now that you’ve learnt from your past errors, here are the steps you need to take to become a better guy and learn how to get over a girl you like at the same time.

#1 It takes time. You have to deal with it. There’s no easy way to get over a girl you like. All you can do is keep yourself distracted until the wound heals.

[Read: How to forget about a girl and pretend she doesn’t even exist in no time]

#2 Shut her from your mind. Don’t think of her. If her thoughts come to your mind, think of something else. It feels good to remember her face or look at her new photos and updates on social media. But you’re only making the whole experience hurt more.

You’ve lost her and she’s not coming back. So why are you hurting yourself for no reason? Do you enjoy the self-inflicted humiliation of zooming into her photos on your screen while she’s falling for someone else, or hooking up with another guy? Are you not feeling pathetic enough already?

#3 Don’t become a new guy. Don’t change your personality around her after she tells you that she doesn’t like you. Don’t get moody or grumpy when she’s around. You’re not a petulant child, so grow a pair and behave like a man.

Your plea for attention will fall on deaf ears and she may even avoid you further because you’re acting like a weird prick. And you’ll be the one that’s hurting even more. She doesn’t like you, so even if you try to get her attention by avoiding her, she wouldn’t care!

[Read: How to kiss a friend accidentally and get away with it]

#4 Don’t behave like a hopeless romantic. If you get drunk or talk endlessly about her, you’re not doing yourself a favor. Learn from the experience and try to avoid the same errors the next time you like a girl.

#5 Give up. Share your feelings with her just one more time if you really want to, but in a casual manner. If that doesn’t work, give up and never hope for her to say yes again. Keeping your hopes alive will stunt you from becoming a better guy, pursuing another girl, or even moving on with your life.

[Read: How to get a girl to like you again after you failed the first time]

#6 Don’t look at her as a prize. “If I get richer, she’ll date me,” “If I start behaving better, she’ll date me”, “If I get fitter, she’ll f**k me”. Well, f**k you, because none of this will happen. These lines looping in your mind will only make you more miserable. You’re only making yourself more vulnerable to heartbreak because quite frankly, she doesn’t care about you or who you are anymore.

[Read: How to make a girl like you without asking her out]

#7 Don’t plot revenge. She has a right to say no to you, just like you have the right to say no to a girl you find uninteresting. Accept her choice and move on. Plotting revenge will stagnate your life and leave you obsessing about her even more. Learn to face rejection, and deal with it. That’s the only way to become a better version of you.

#8 Find other girls to pursue. This is the best way to get over a girl you like. You’ve had your chance and you blew it. So screw it and move on. Learn from your errors and find someone else to flirt with. If you make the right moves this time around, you’ll definitely get the girl you like and get over the girl who broke your heart at the same time!

[Read: How to be a good boyfriend – 35 traits that’ll make you the best ever]

Use this guide on how to get over a girl who doesn’t like you and you’ll definitely learn from the experience. And the best part is that it’ll make you a much better guy who’ll eventually get a much better girl too!

The post How to Get Over a Girl Who Doesn’t Like You Without Getting Bitter is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



WATCH: Propinquity; or, How You Meet the Girls & People You Meet

The final video before the big CHARISMA-TOUCH-LIFESTYLE launch (this Saturday) is now out.

The subject is 'propinquity' -- a word psychologists use to describe one of the most important concepts underlying who ends up dating, hooking up with, and marrying whom; who ends up becoming friends with whom; who ends up working what jobs, and advancing to what level in their careers; and more.

If you want to command your lifestyle, and not just float through life, you MUST know about propinquity. You can watch my video on it here:

propinquity lifestyle videoWatch the new video by Chase on propinquity… scientists’ term for the “universal current” that runs through every man’s life, and influences the women (and men) who enter his life.

(or click here to watch it)



Wednesday, 31 March 2021

How to Get Over Someone You Love Fast & Not Give A Damn Anymore!

Yes, there are 30 ways, and you can learn how to get over someone you love fast, and get to the stage where you just don’t care about them. Try this!

What do you do when you’re madly in love with someone who doesn’t love you back? It’s not easy to know how to get over someone you love fast, but there are some very powerful steps that can take you to a better place!

Almost all of us know what it’s like to be heartbroken. Pure torture doesn’t even come close to describing that feeling of being cruelly rejected, either by someone you have a crush on, or someone you were in a relationship with. It happened to me, it happened to her, it happened to him, and it happened to you. Learning how to get over someone you love fast is not easy, but it can be done.

The pain you feel is unlike any other and undoubtedly leaves you wondering if there’s anything in the world that can hurt so much. And honestly, there is just something about heartache that no other kind of physical pain in the world surpasses.

[Read: The 10 stages of heartbreak and how to get over each of them]

Everyone deals with the pain in unique ways

Before you try to figure out how to get over someone you love, and fast, you need to understand that how people deal with this pain is very subjective. Some turn into party animals. Some turn into hermits. No matter how you deal with it, you always wonder why is it so hard to get over this person. It’s not easy, and it downright sucks.

You lose all your confidence. You start caring less about people that matter and care for you, and the important things around you. And the world turns into something ugly and devoid of the smells, sights, sounds, and feelings of being alive.

[Read: How to deal with the pain of loving someone who doesn’t love you back]

Why is it so difficult to get over someone you love?

Getting over someone is easy to execute in theory, but it’s way more difficult in real life. It seems like they got over you, and it seems almost effortless to them. But why exactly aren’t you over them? 

Every heartbreak is another episode of us crying into a tub of ice cream and the person you love going leading their lives as if nothing happened. In the midst of it all, you check out your social media feeds and see the “love of your life” chilling with their friends and not looking like the train wreck that you hope they would be!

That feeling you get when you can’t seem to let go of someone you love may be unique to you, but there are a few traits of broken hearts that are universally common. It can be worse for a few people, but the mechanism stays the same. It hurts, and you can’t get over them. Why is that? Here are the reasons.

#1 You are driven to want to be loved. According to Dr. Helen Fisher, Ph.D., people are programmed to crave romantic experiences. It is not because our emotional minds tell us to look for love. The truth is, love is a primal need.

After a breakup, your brain starts to go into withdrawal because the romantic experience of being in a relationship has been snuffed out by your loss. You can’t get over it yet because your brain is telling you that you desperately need love. Unfortunately, the only source currently on your mind is your ex.

[Read: Does my ex miss me? 15 signs your ex clearly misses you right now]

#2 The thought of not having the person you love in your life is the same as experiencing physical pain. And what do we do when we feel pain? We focus on it because there is nothing else stronger than that feeling. If someone constantly pinches you, you would not be able to think about anything else until you make that person stop.

While separated from someone you love, you feel the same level of discomfort and unease that stems from physical pain. So, the two things you end up doing are to either focus on that pain or try to make it go away.

#3 You were addicted to this person you loved. No, really! You were. Researchers found the same areas that light up the brain when a person is high on drugs, is the same area that lights up when they are in love. Once you take away that high, a person undergoes the same feelings of withdrawal, but not as physically damaging as with actual recreational drugs. Without the help of a great support system and a proactive approach to feeling better, you end up hanging on to the feeling of loss.

Unfortunately, most of the easy methods are always the hardest to follow. Forgetting about your ex, seeing a therapist, talking about your pain, etc. Those are all helpful, but not if you don’t want to do any of it. Therein lies the problem of letting go. You will not let go if you nothing to make it happen. Reading this article is your first step.

[Read: Letting go of people – Why is it so hard and where are you going wrong]

How to get over someone you love in the fastest and healthiest way possible

Whether you were dumped, cheated on, or simply did not get the response you hoped for, when you professed your love to someone, here’s what you need to know how to get get over someone you love, in the fastest and healthiest way possible.

And if this is someone you work with or have to see everyday, yikes, but fret not, because here’s how to get over someone you have to see every day without losing it!

#1 Don’t put a time limit on yourself. People make this mistake all the time. And this actually makes the process even longer and harder to go through. Understanding how to get over someone fast is giving yourself space and time to grieve and process what happened. If not, you end up bouncing from relationship to relationship with this person in your head the entire time.

[Read: The 7 stages of heartbreak when you become someone’s ex]

#2 Feel like shit if you want to. There are people who put on a fake smile and pretend they’re completely fine. Truthfully, they’re not fine, so why bother pretending? If you’re sad, then be sad. Stay in on the weekend, watch a sad movie, cry it out, and pass out holding a bag of chips. Give yourself the opportunity to truly be sad.

Do whatever it takes to numb the pain. Once that’s done, snap out of it and get over it. You’ll know when you’re ready to rejoin the real world. This usually happens 10 pounds later.

#3 Rome wasn’t built in a day. Be patient. Don’t think that you can get over things in a heartbeat. Don’t try to convince yourself that everything’s okay, when it patently isn’t. Give it time and do everything else you need to do to ensure that you are making healthy, step-by-step progress.

[Read: The 10 stages of a breakup and how to get through every single one of them]

#4 Talk it over. Try not to keep all that heartache and hurt to yourself. It’s exactly times like these that you need friends to talk to, to maybe shed a few tears with, and to start processing things objectively by talking the relationship through.

[Read: 10 things you HAVE to do after a breakup to feel awesome again]

#5 Mourn your loss. Imagine how long it takes for a flesh wound to heal. Now recognize the fact that inner scars take far longer. Go through the motions of mourning your lost relationship. Start by trying to accept that it’s over.

#6 Find someone else *but chances are, you can’t handle this!*. You know the saying, “The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else”? Well, it’s true for some people. If you can play it cool, call it an alternative, a rebound, or whatever you want. If you’re occupied with someone else for a few weeks, there is a lower chance you’re worrying about the doofus who won’t love you back.

[Read: 13 rebound sex questions to know if you’re ready for it]

#7 It’s dangerous to fill the emptiness with sex. Okay, this is totally contrary to the tip we’ve made above about getting over an ex. Honestly, sleeping with someone else doesn’t work. And it’s a risky proposition. So many people think that if they rebound, they’ll get over the person quicker, but that’s usually false.

If anything, it makes you realize either a) how good the sex was with them or b) that you two had a connection. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have sex, but give yourself some time before you do.

Here’s where having sex with someone can help. Sleeping with someone can help in those weak moments when you’ve hit rock bottom and you feel like there’s no reason to exist without being loved by this person you love. When you’re heartbroken, just receiving a flirty or complimentary text can make you feel just a wee bit better about yourself.

So, rebounds work for some people. And they don’t work for many others. Use a rebound as a last resort. But never as a long term solution. Almost always, a rebound will help you for a few weeks, and if you don’t focus on getting over this person you love at the same time, you’ll only end up feeling worse about yourself.

#8 Go out and flirt. If you realize that trying a rebound is something you just can’t handle, or it doesn’t interest you, try this. Just go out there and flirt if you want to get over someone you love. Being social reminds you there’s a whole world of potential partners out there ready for the taking.

Of course, it won’t help you get over the person you love. BUT it will give you a social boost and the confidence to remember that you’re still hot stuff. A broken heart is not the end of the world. It’s just a phase, and you will get through it.

[Read: How to flirt with a friend and tease them without being weird]

#9 Delete them from everything. Don’t keep their number in your phone. Don’t follow them on Instagram, don’t have them or their mom on Facebook—nothing. And when we say nothing, we mean nothing. Remove them completely from your life, at least for now. If you want to get over them fast, then stop stalking them on social media.

[Read: How to avoid the awkward drama of drunk texting]

#10 Be honest about why it happened. Why did you break up with them or why did they break up with you? This is the time to be terribly honest with yourself. Just because you love them, doesn’t mean they love you back. There’s a reason why it happened. This is the chance for you to accept the real reason of why it occurred.

#11 Focus on their flaws. Focus on all the stuff that made you angry. From her talking back to you, to him being an arrogant ass. I’m sure there are plenty of things your former love did that got on your nerves. As unhealthy as this step may be, it is a rather effective one.

[Read: How to successfully get over someone by truly hating them]

#12 Closure is for movies. That whole thing about getting closure, confronting this person who doesn’t love you back, and getting them to sit down and have a great debate on the reasons for separation won’t do any good, whatsoever.

All it will do is have you thinking about them all over again, without providing any of the answers that you were probably hoping to hear. Closure works brilliantly on the big screen. But in real life, it falls far short of any of the intended objectives. Instead, give yourself time to grieve and heal.

[Read: 12 reasons why the no contact rule is the best way to get over someone]

#13 Recognize you’re worth more. Why pine over someone who doesn’t think you’re worthy enough to be their partner? If they don’t love you back, screw it. You’re better off without them anyway. There are seven billion other people on the planet. You’re bound to find at least one who thinks the world of you. [Read: How to stop loving someone else… and love yourself more]

#14 Get back into the real world. Right now, you’re probably theorizing, thinking about the future, and the “what if” questions run through your head. Now, we get it. All of us do that, but it’s not going to help you get over them. Get back into the real world and what’s actually happening around you. The fact is, you’re not with them anymore. As of now, it doesn’t look like you’re going to be with them.

#15 Stay occupied. To keep your mind off your failed love, keep yourself busy. Pick up new skills and hobbies, throw yourself into work, and focus on extracurricular projects.

#16 Release your anger and pain. Binge eating and crying only get you so far. Find other outlets to channel your pain. As difficult as it may seem, one way to do this is by working out. If that isn’t enough to tire you out, start volunteering and helping others.

The world is a harsh place filled with problems and making a difference puts things into perspective. By engaging yourself in other people’s problems, you realize someone not loving you back is minor, and you can move forward. [Read: Life’s a bitch? 17 feel-good ways to make yourself feel better]

#17 Set your emotions free. So many people bottle up their emotions inside, locking them tightly inside their hearts. But this only prolongs the post-breakup period. You need to get your emotions out. I don’t care if you write a song or poem, take up a kickboxing class, or talk to a therapist. The point is—get them out.

#18 Meditate. Similar to physical exercise, meditation could help you deal with post-relationship withdrawal. Especially if you have to get out and go somewhere to learn how.

#19 Regain confidence. Starting over both mentally and physically is very important. Why not start with a physical change? Get a haircut, change your style, and rev up our workout and diet regime. Once you look good, you’ll start feeling good too.

[Read: How to look hot and go from boring to flawless in a few days]

#20 Step away. You need space to heal. Seeing this person everyday is not going to help you get over it. If you work together, request to move departments. You live in the same area? Stop going to the same watering holes.
Share the same group of friends? Decline party invites if you know they’re going to be there. In time, being in the same room with this person will be tolerable, but until then keep your distance.

#21 You don’t need to always be busy. People think the best way to get over someone fast is to make sure every minute of the day is spent doing something. That’s wrong. You need time to reflect, time alone to sit with your thoughts, that’s the only way you’ll get through it. If you’re busy all day, you ignore the issue and bury it.

#22 Bring back your social life. When you were with them, you probably didn’t see your friends much. Now, that’s normal, but it’s time to get your social life back to how it used to look. This doesn’t mean you hang out with people every day, but surround yourself with positive and supportive friends.

#23 Talk to someone. Don’t underestimate the power of the third-party-point-of-view. Chatting with a friend is good enough. Sometimes it’s important to just let it all out and have someone who cares about you offering up advice. You know they only want what’s best for you. So, trust what they have to say.

[Read: How to get over someone when your heart does not want to]

#24 Remove any memories of them. You don’t have to burn photos, just put them in a box and keep them stored somewhere. You don’t have to burn all your memories with them if you’re trying to figure out how to get over someone fast. Remember, at one point, this person was a part of your life, you’ll want to look back and see how much you’ve changed from that relationship.

#25 Discover who you are. Now is the best time to focus on yourself. Figure out who you are and what you want in life. The next time you allow yourself to fall in love, you won’t make the same mistakes. Take some time off to travel, switch up your routine, try new things, and live for yourself.

[Read: 15 powerful lessons you can learn from your own breakups]

#26 Spend time with loved ones. Be sure to surround yourself with friends and family. They reinforce what you already know, and the plain and simple fact that there are other people in your life who love you. Focus on them instead of on that one person who doesn’t.

#27 Use psychology. One of the most powerful ways to convince your subconscious mind to believe something is repetition. The more you repeat the fact that the relationship is over, the more this statement is likely to turn into a solid belief. If you keep telling yourself that this person doesn’t love you and that you need to move on, you will eventually believe it.

#28 Don’t be hopeful. They’re not coming back to you. This is the mindset to have. Hope is what prevents us from moving on and accepting what happened. We think they’ll come back to us and in some cases they do, but the best thing is to assume that they’re not. This way, you focus on healing.

[Read: How to get over a broken heart – A guide for every step of the way]

#29 Do you. You probably feel that you lost something of yours. It’s time to change that way of thinking. Think of this as an improvement. As if you shed a layer of skin. Now, it’s time to focus on your mental health. Go get a haircut, get your nails done, go for a walk—it doesn’t matter what you do as long as you show some self-love.

#30 Speak to a therapist. You may have great friends or a very understanding family, and that’s all great. Most of them may even be willing to listen to your problems and help you out. But if it gets to the point where you feel like you are burdening your friends with the same stories and problems over and over again, or you’re just not able to move forward and forget this person you love, do not be ashamed to ask for help. Just make sure to do this because you want to be helped, not because you just want a soundboard.

[Read: How to get over feeling unwanted and start feeling desirable again]

Getting over someone you love who doesn’t love you back is one of the hardest things to do. But once you finally get over it, you’ll be a much stronger person. Follow these steps to get over someone fast, and they’ll be the healthiest steps for you, and your future.

The post How to Get Over Someone You Love Fast & Not Give A Damn Anymore! is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Tactics Tuesdays: Naughty Interest Bait

naughty interest baitYou have something sexual you want to tell a girl or show her, but it’s inappropriate. How do you get around its impropriety? By baiting her into begging you to share it with her.

Want a simple little tactic you can use to bait girls into asking you things you couldn't/wouldn't normally be able to get away with in conversation?

Because there are some things that you really cannot just come out and drop on a girl, without it being too forward or out-of-place.

The solution, if you want to use a really forward compliment or bring up or show her something really sketchy is to lure her into asking you for it, pushing you for it, so that when you finally drop it on her, "she asked for it."

With a little good framing, this is not hard to do at all.

Note: while this tactic is simple, it requires a fair degree of calibration, and thus its use is a bit more advanced. So this will mostly be for intermediate and up guys (and really is for more advanced seducers).

Beginners may still find it interesting to read about, if purely for the psychology aspect.



 
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