Thursday, 19 August 2021

2 Ways a Girl May Resist You Picking Her Up: ASD vs. FSC

man trying to kiss womanWomen will resist your pickup attempts for different reasons. One is to avoid looking easy (anti-slut defense)… but another is because you don’t seem like the “right” guy.

Hey guys! Welcome back.

Today I will discuss two different forms of resistance you get from women: anti-slut defense (ASD) and female state control (FSC). I’ll differentiate between both and discuss their connection to frame-related issues while providing suggestions for dealing with each.

I have mentioned both forms of resistance at length in the past and dedicated a long series to female state control. It is a fairly new concept I came up with a few years ago, which generated a paradigm shift in the seduction community’s conception of female resistance.

Anti-slut defense, on the other hand, is an older concept, if still key. Many seducers have also discussed it at length.

I don’t believe that a comparison or differentiation between the two concepts has ever been attempted, with clear indicators allowing us to distinguish them. Understanding each form of resistance and telling them apart is crucial if you want to use the correct remedy efficiently. I propose to do this today.

First, let’s recap both types of resistance.



Thursday, 12 August 2021

Should I Call Him? 15 Real Answers You Need to Make Up Your Mind

If you’re asking yourself the question “should I call him?”, then you need to keep reading to find out. Even if you like him, it’s not always a good idea. 

should i call him

While it’s easy to think you’d always know the answer to “should I call him?,” truthfully, it can be quite a challenging answer. Even if you like him, it’s not always the best idea to do so.

If you’ve dated a few guys in your past, there may have been a few instances where it wasn’t always the best choice. If anything, you even wish you could take that phone call back in an instant. 

Should I call him: The perspective from both sides of the coin

If you do choose to call him, you need to make sure he’s worth it. Does he feel the same way? Does he treat you right? Is he a good person? Will the call not hurt anyone? Is he an ex? These are all questions you should be asking yourself before even making that call.

You can absolutely call him as the decision will always be yours. However, it shouldn’t be a call done out of loneliness, desperation, or boredom.

Call him because you genuinely care or maybe you want to make that brave move on your crush.

Don’t call because it’s 3 am and you don’t have anyone to talk to – you’re better than that. 

The answer would be no if calling him won’t add anything beneficial in your life. Maybe it prevents you from moving on, or maybe it’s only going to hurt you more because of unrequited love. If you know the answer or if you know the call is going to end in pain, it’s not worth the risk.

This means absolutely no calling your ex, no matter who did the dumping. It’s never an excuse to call up someone just because you’re feeling nostalgic. If you’re asking yourself the question, “should I call him?” and he’s already hurt you more than once or gotten your hopes up, then it’s a definite no. [Read: How to stop texting someone when that’s all you want to do]

The ‘should I call him’ answers revealed

While there are certainly times you end up regretting calling him, there are always times where it’s the best decision of your life.

Before calling him, you need to look at the situation at hand and see if it’s a smart move. Well, here are some answers to the “should I or shouldn’t I call him” question.

1. Follow your gut instinct

You really need to start listening to your gut instinct way more. Most often, it’s always the right decision. Okay, you’re sitting here freaking out about this guy. Is this because of your self-esteem and ego? Or do you actually like him? Follow your gut when it comes to this.

Stop letting your emotions control you and go with the decision that feels right. If you actually like him, then go for it! You have nothing better to lose anyway. If things don’t pan out, at least you get to say you called him and tried. [Read: Ghosted after the first date? 13 calm steps to quell the rage]

2. Don’t call him if he said he was going to

You really don’t need to ask the question, “should I call him?” if he said he was going to call you. We know guys *and most people too!* tend to say one thing and mean another, but if someone says they’ll call you, it’s best to wait for their call.

If he doesn’t call you, then he’s not interested *or fell off a cliff.* If someone likes you and verbally tells you to expect a call from them, then they’ll call. You really can’t get anything by calling because it just makes you look desperate and clingy. 

3. But you can call him

This might sound very confusing, but again, it’s still your choice whether you decide to call him or not. Are you interested in seeing him? If you are, then call him. If you had a first date and it went really well, we’re sure he’s going to call you, but there’s nothing wrong with you making the first move.

If you honestly feel it in your gut that’s the right call, then don’t hesitate to go for it! You never know, he might end up appreciating that call and take it a step further. Sometimes, one phone call can change everything so it’s important to make the right decision. [Read: When should a guy call after the first date?]

4. It’s the 21st century

Really, the modern dating culture no longer focuses on who makes the first move or who calls who. Don’t be afraid of being seen as anything less just because you call him. It’s kind of outdated to wait for a guy to call you.

Even if you haven’t had the first date, there’s nothing wrong with calling him and asking him out. If you really like him and it’s worth a shot, then the answer to the question “should I call him?” is yes. 

5. If he’s playing mind games, don’t bother

This should be common sense, but love and infatuation can block the logical slide of our brains. If he treats you anything less than you deserve, then don’t call him. It’s not worth your time and energy. If he finds it amusing to make you feel like the world one minute, and he ignores your existence the next, don’t call him.

If he does this, don’t even bother doing anything with him – just drop him from your life. You don’t deserve to be played mind games with just because he can’t find anything else to do. No matter how drop-dead gorgeous he is, just drop him. [Read: How to play a player – 12 ways to return the favor like a boss]

6. He may be shy

Interestingly enough, not every guy emerges from a Hollywood chick flick. There are some guys who are actually shy and anxious to call you for whatever reason. Maybe he wants everything to be perfect when he does call you or he’s building the nerve to do so, but it’s a legitimate reason.

Of course, you can always do it for him and call instead. This would make things easier for him and you never know, things might kick off because of that call. [Read: Should I text him first? Find the answer using these 10 steps]

7. Does he even have your number?

If he has your Instagram or Facebook, there’s no excuse in the book for not calling you. In fact, people don’t even use their numbers to call anymore as everyone uses social media nowadays.

On the off chance that he doesn’t have either your number or your socials, then you can be the first to call. As long as he’s a good guy and he isn’t some guy who ghosted you, then the answer to the question of should I call him is yes. 

8. You give assurance

Many men aren’t sure about making the first move because they don’t know if you’re interested. Even if they give off a confident vibe, a lot are unsure if their feelings are reciprocated. If there’s anything men fear, it’s rejection.

When you do make the first move of calling him, you give him the assurance that you feel the same way. Maybe that call could be the key to a first date or maybe a second one. You never know, right? [Read: 14 signs a guy really likes you but if afraid you’ll reject him]

9. Are you always the one calling him?

One-sided calls are never a good thing. Even if we do live in the 21st century, you shouldn’t always be the one making effort to call. Unless his phone is broken or he fell off the face of the earth, he should also call you!

Your efforts should at least be reciprocated, if not outdone. So if you notice this pattern, stop calling him and see what happens. If he doesn’t bother, then that’s your sign – he’s just not that interested. [Read: Why is he texting me if he is not interested? Here are 15 reasons why]

10. There are no rules

Stop listening to the rules to never call first after a date or to wait three days before contacting them. If you really like someone, there should be no rules when following your heart. Relationships aren’t something you successfully get into even if you play by the rules.

You’ll find that the best experiences are often those you never saw coming. You just have to be true to yourself and do what feels right. [Read: How to make a guy chase you –  15 ways to make a guy fall hard]

11. If he’s an ex, ditch your phone 

We mean this in the best way possible, but it’s better to lose your phone than to text your ex. This is literally the worst dating decision you can make.

Even if you miss him, there’s no reason you should go back to him! You broke up for a reason so do everything you can to resist the urge to call him up. Do you really want to put yourself through all that pain again? [Read: How to get over your ex-boyfriend: 15 fastest ways to forget him]

12. If there’s a possibility he feels the same, take the chance

Life is really too short to miss out on the chance that your crush or possible boyfriend feels the same for you. He might be shy to admit it or have a hard time finding the right opportunity, so why don’t you make the first move?

If you turn out to be wrong, it’s always better to try than to regret it. If you’re right, then it can turn out to be everything you’ve wanted in your dating life. A phone call may seem scary, but in this scenario, it does more good than harm. 

13. Is a call or a text better?

There are instances where we automatically jump to call someone when it can be said better in a text message. Not to mention, it’s not as confrontational as a phone call.

It’s always better to think first before calling him, especially as not everyone picks up the phone these days.

Think of it this way, a text is yesterday’s version of a call. And a call is yesterday’s version of dropping by unannounced to someone’s house.

So unless you both know each other well enough to hop on a call, it’s a great idea to build on a texting relationship first before you do decide to call him. [Read: How to text a guy: 18 secrets to go from timid to text temptress]

14. It helps you get closure faster

On the off chance that a guy isn’t into you, then you can find out faster by calling him. If he doesn’t pick up or says directly or indirectly that he’s not interested, then there’s your cue to move on and find someone else. This is a much better scenario compared to tolerating the waiting game of him calling you first. 

15. Do you have something interesting to talk about? 

Nobody wants to talk to someone who can’t contribute anything interesting to the conversation. When deciding on the question of ‘should I call him,’ you need to be sure you actually have something to talk about. It can’t be small talk, especially when you’re calling your crush.

If you want that phone call to be a real success and land a date with him, you need to be the most interesting and dynamic version of yourself. In other words, don’t be boring! [Read: How to talk to a guy – 34 tips to sweet talk him and make any guy fall for you]

So, should I call him? 

Yes, do it! Unless he’s a psychopath, an ex, treating you badly, or giving you mixed signals, then you definitely should! Even a short phone call can turn your dating life around for the better.

You never know, you could even land your dream date because of that. Now wouldn’t that be amazing?

So, now that you know the dos and don’ts to the question of, should I call him, are you going to? Only you get a say on whether you should call him or not. Really, in the end, you should do what feels right. If you want to be brave, then go for it! 

The post Should I Call Him? 15 Real Answers You Need to Make Up Your Mind is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Wednesday, 11 August 2021

Petty Percy: 18 Signs of a Petty Person that Make Them So Annoying

Interacting with a petty person can be one of the most frustrating things to deal with. This is why it’s important to know the signs of a petty person.

signs of a petty person

It’s never easy to deal with pettiness as it can be quite an annoying trait. By knowing the signs of a petty person, you know exactly how to identify them. When you’re dealing with someone petty, they make every situation infuriating. Even if it’s a simple thing, they manage to make a big deal out of everything.

Who is a petty person?

A petty person is someone who concerns themselves far too much with the things that don’t really matter, the small details, the things which have no bearing on anything of importance.

Okay, let’s admit it, we’ve all had our petty moments every now and then.

Having pet peeves is completely normal, but petty people tend to make a big deal out of everything. Maybe they got upset because you stepped on their shoes or lost their pen. It makes you enraged to deal with their pettiness, but there’s nothing you can do about it as it’s part of their nature.

If you know someone petty and they happen to be your friend, you’re in for quite a ride. If they’re close to you, you’re subjected to their pettiness all the more.

[Read: How to stop negative people from sapping all your energy]

Why are petty people the worst?

There’s no way of expecting what things petty people will get triggered by. Maybe it’s their own issues, maybe you spilled their coffee, or maybe your presence just annoys them. Having a petty friend is the absolute worst experience and there’s no getting around it.

Even if being petty is somewhat glamorized today, there’s nothing good or positive about pettiness. If you offend or even betray someone petty, they’ll likely hold grudges for the rest of their life as it’s one of the signs of a petty person.

When you hurt them even unintentionally, they’ll do everything to seek revenge so that you hurt as much as you hurt them!

Sounds scary and creepy, huh? This is just the tip of the iceberg when dealing with a petty person.

[Read: 15 ways to spot and stop selfish people from hurting you]

The most obvious signs of a petty person

If you’re not sure if someone you’re close to falls into the petty bracket or not, let’s check out these signs of a petty person to help shed some light and recognize the rotten ones.

1. They’re experts of making a big deal out of everything

If you’re looking for someone who’s an expert in making a big deal out of everything, then that’s a petty person for you. Perhaps you forget to text them back because you’re busy at work.

An ordinary person would be understanding about this situation, but a petty person would do everything to hold your mistake against you. Even if it’s something minor, they’d go to great lengths just to make your life miserable.

This is one of the signs of a petty person you should watch out for. You end up apologizing and making it up to them when you’re really not sure what you’re apologizing for. [Read: Do you have broken bird syndrome? How to be empathetic with boundaries]

2. They’re pretty sly in some ways

Petty people don’t actually intend to be petty – it’s just in their nature. Sometimes, they use their pettiness to be a little sly. It’s easily covered up because they play the victim very well. Even when they’re in the wrong, they’d play the blame game and act like the victim and make everything your fault.

This is one of the signs of petty people that’s exhausting to tolerate. It’s not just manipulative, but toxic in every sense. Petty people will do everything in their capability to get what they want in every situation they’re in.

3. They’re never wrong *at least in their own minds*

Since they’re basically masters at manipulating you in taking the blame, this means they also never admit their faults. Never.

Petty people hold grudges in a special kind of way. Even if their life depends on it, they’ll still continue to hold grudges towards someone they perceived wronged them.

If you’re waiting for a petty person to apologize to you, then you’re setting yourself for disappointment. Unfortunately, that’s something that might never happen.

Of course, that means you end up taking the blame for things that really aren’t your fault – just for the sake of ending the argument. Whether it’s because of pride or their tendency to hold grudges, this is one of the infuriating signs of a petty person. [Read: The creepy signs your friend is secretly an energy vampire]

4. They’re experts at grudges in a timid way

The thing about petty people is they don’t hold grudges like an average person does. You won’t even know they’re holding grudges until you feel their avoidance and anger towards you. This is where the term passive-aggressiveness comes into significance.

When they’re mad or angry at you, they’ll treat you in the most passive-aggressive manner that you won’t even be aware of their grudges until they suddenly ignore you. Annoyingly, it may stop you from socializing with people they have an issue with, simply to keep the peace. [Read: How to deal with passive aggresisve behavior calmly and with class]

5. You’ll be treading on eggshells

One of the signs of a petty person is that you must tread on eggshells a little when you’re around them. It’s very easy to upset them and you might not even know you’ve done it.

This is why it’s really hard to act like yourself and be comfortable when you’re around a petty person.

One of the signs of a petty person is indeed constantly watching your actions and words around them, afraid it might trigger their frustration over something minor.

You’ll find out later when they’re acting a little ‘off’ or someone else tells you what you’ve apparently done to them. [Read: How to know if you’re walking on eggshells in your love life]

6. They can be super judgmental

 Another one of the signs of a petty person is that they can be very judgmental of others. When someone looks or acts different from their level of standards, they’re quick to judge and criticize. Even before getting to know the person, they jump into the worst assumptions of them.

They’re not particularly open-minded in that respect, and they’re also pretty big gossipers. Again, this doesn’t come as a shock as petty people aren’t exactly people who can get along with others.

7. There is a ‘look’ they give you

Again with the judgment, petty people are quick to give you that look when you say something that either triggers them, frustrates them or isn’t just something they agree with. Even if it’s something minor, you can see the judgment all over their facial expressions.

The thing is, they don’t even bother hiding their facial expressions even if this is the case. This is likely to be an eye roll when you say or do something they don’t agree with or maybe a side-eye expression that stops you in your tracks. [Read: How to stop caring – 20 steps to put yourself first and care less about others]

8. You can’t pretend you didn’t say something – they know

If you sent a message and said a particular thing, don’t try and pretend that you didn’t. This is one of the signs of a petty person that you really can’t get around, no matter how hard you try.

They’ve memorized what you said and because of their detailed-oriented personality, they know the precision of your words. You can’t get much past a petty person. Even if you have no ill intentions in mind, it can be super-annoying.

9. They’re great at social media snooping

A petty person likely spends a lot of time on social media and loves to post on things that don’t really have much to do with them. They’ll gossip and even start drama in the comments section if they have to.

It’s a perfect outlet for a petty person as it gives them all the drama and none of the confrontation since everything is just online. They can always get out of the situation when necessary.

10. They’re drama-holics, but they will never admit it

If there’s a certain theme in dealing with a petty person, it’s their addiction to drama. They will do everything to either start one or be in one. Making mountains out of molehills is a petty person’s specialty.

If this is something you regularly notice, it’s definitely one of the signs of a petty person. This is also why it’s extremely exhausting to be friends with someone petty. [Read: Attention seeking behavior and why some people go looking for drama]

11. Sometimes you can’t help but respond in kindness

When you’re around someone petty for a considerable amount of time, it’s easy to act the same way. Honestly, the only people who can tolerate petty people are those who are kind and patient in nature.

Even if you’re tempted to fight back their pettiness, the best thing to do is respond with kindness and consideration. [Read: The traits of toxic people that can damage you emotionally]

12. They’re condescending in nature

Surprise, surprise! If there’s anything a petty person is absolutely good at. it’s being condescending in nature. They will do absolutely everything to rub it in your face that they’re right and you’re wrong.

One of the signs of a petty person is that they think they know everything, even when this is far from the truth. They like feeling above or superior to others to an extreme.

13. They’re terrible listeners

When someone is selfish, condescending, dramatic, and manipulative, it’s only natural that they won’t be great at listening to you either. They’ll only listen to be able to respond properly or for the sake of pretending *but they’d rather not.*

They really don’t care what you have to share or what ideas you’re contributing – all they care about is themselves. As painful as the sounds, it’s one of the harsh signs of a petty person. [Read: The conversational narcissist – The one who hate listening and love talking]

14. Passive-aggressiveness is their nature

There’s no getting around to it as you’ll likely deal with a lot of passive-aggressiveness with a petty person. While being aggressive isn’t ideal either, there’s just something infuriating about someone who’s indirectly being aggressive to you without being obvious about it.

What they say could mean completely the opposite of what they feel, which can be very confusing to a lot of people. [Read: How to deal with passive aggressive behavior calmly & with class]

15. They have to have the final word

We know the phrase, that some people just love to have the last word. But with petty people, this is an obvious sign you have to live with 24/7. They always want to feel above or superior in any situation.

If you’re friends with a petty person or dating one *good luck with that*, then they’ll want to have the upper hand. In every argument or every power struggle, they have to win. The worst part? You have to let them.

16. There’s just no such thing as being the bigger person

Forgiveness? Empathy? Consideration? Nope. These aren’t things that a petty person knows. They want you to feel the same pain that they’ve gone through, even if it’s incredibly minor.

In fact, they might even double the pain just to seek revenge for the inconvenience and pain you caused them. You didn’t text back for a day? Expect them to avoid texting you for a week. That’s a petty person for you. [Read: Am I manipulative? 20 signs you clearly manipulate everyone around you]

17. They get mad about the same things

When dealing with a petty person, they often repeat the same things they get upset about. Whether it’s failing to respond to their text right away or liking someone else’s photos on social media, they always get offended by the same things even if they know the unavoidable reasons that caused the issue in the first place.

18. They expect the world to adjust for them

With a petty person, it’s always about their needs and wants – never about anyone else’s. The people around them will constantly adjust to avoid any complications with a petty person, but they’ll never return this favor.

This is one of the most selfish signs of a petty person that unfortunately, they can’t do anything about – not unless they want to.

The damaging and unhealthy side of being around a petty person

A petty person never intends to make your life as miserable as it is. If it’s hard enough for strangers to meet someone petty, it’s even harder to stay friends with them.

Is being petty damaging? Yes and no. If it’s aimed towards you, it’s annoying, upsetting, and you end up taking the blame for a million things that aren’t your fault. That in itself is unhealthy.

Even when not aimed at you, pettiness is a self-destructive trait that can ruin all your friendships and relationships. After all, who would want to stay friends with someone condescending and dramatic *unless you’re petty yourself*? [Read: The 25 types of bad friends you MUST unfriend from your life ASAP]

These signs of a petty person should also be taken lightly in some cases. We’re all guilty of throwing shade occasionally or being caught up in the drama. However, if it’s more than two or three of these, then that person might just be a petty person to a fault.

If someone goes out of their way to start drama and make things a bigger deal than it has to be, unfortunately, you’re dealing with someone petty.

[Read: Understanding how people use emotional manipulation]

Look out for these signs of a petty person. You need to realize whether this is someone you can deal with because if not, you can always choose to walk away. After all, pettiness isn’t an easy quality to handle!

The post Petty Percy: 18 Signs of a Petty Person that Make Them So Annoying is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Why Relationships Fail: 25 Reasons Why Love Can Fall Apart Entirely

We often want love to last a lifetime, so why do relationships fail? Can love really be forever or is it all a myth? Keep reading to know why love fails.

why relationships fail

Relationships fall apart and break – that’s the reality of life. Not everything was meant to last forever, even love. However, why do relationships fail exactly? We spend our entire lives romanticizing the idea that couples can stay together as long as their life does.

This is what makes love and marriage so enticing to have. Everyone dreams of finding that one person to build their life with. However, life doesn’t work that way.

Relationships fail and even something as strong as a seasoned marriage can fall apart. Life can get in the way, couples cheat, or they get bored, and they break up. No matter how hard you hold onto the relationship, it can still fail.

[Read: How to face relationship challanges and overcome them as a couple in no time]

Are all relationships bound to fail?

If relationships eventually fail one way or another, why bother getting into one?

However, not all relationships are doomed for failure. Some relationships last as long as a decade, and some even a lifetime. It takes a lot of hard work and commitment for this to happen *and a lot of forgiveness, too!*

Relationships that last practically forever are proof that real love isn’t just fictional. It’s not just something you see in romance movies and shows, but it’s real.

The reason why relationships fail is because people are quick to break up just because something didn’t work the way they expected it to. Excusing abusive behaviors like cheating and betrayal, if you want a relationship to succeed, you should always find the heart to forgive and overlook the flaws of your partner, and learn to work as a couple, if you want the love to last. [Read: 9 stages of a relationship all couples go through in their lifetime]

25 common reasons why relationships fail so often

A relationship doesn’t just fail because it’s meant to be that way *although it can be an indicator you’re with the wrong person*. Most often, relationships fail because the bad outweighed the good so much that there’s no other direction but failure.

Maybe their flaws were too much to put up with, or maybe someone showed an inadequate amount of effort and took the other for granted.

A relationship fails when one or both parties stop putting in the work to make it work. With this being said, let’s take a look at all the reasons why relationships fail in real life.

[Read: 7 secret signs that reveal a bad romance in progress]

1. Relying on your partner for happiness

This is common among people who have either low self-esteem or have very few good things going on in their life. One of the core reasons why relationships fail is when you think your partner would solve all your life problems. A relationship can certainly contribute to that happiness, but it can’t be your entire happiness.

The problem with this is that it may put too much pressure on your partner. It shouldn’t be their responsibility to make you happy all the time. This kind of mindset is exactly what results in co-dependent relationships. [Read: Am I clingy? 14 signs you’re clingy and pushing your partner into unhappiness]

2. Not standing up for yourself

Even when it’s the easiest thing to give in to what your partner wants, you need to stand up for yourself. Your partner isn’t going to love you less just because you stood up for yourself *if they do, then they’re not worth it.*

Not standing up for yourself is what causes resentment and anger in relationships, another common cause of why relationships fail. One day, you might wake up and feel so used that you end up snapping and breaking up with your partner. [Read: 16 reasons why it’s so easy for your partner to take you for granted]

3. Too much dominance

The opposite of not standing up for yourself is being too dominant in a relationship. No, dominance doesn’t automatically refer to men. There are so many women that are even more dominant and controlling than men, which can cause breakups.

Don’t yell, nag, bicker, or do anything along these lines to your partner. A relationship should be about partnership, rather than dominance.

If you wanted to be above your partner in power, then don’t be in a relationship in the first place. Instead of fostering a relationship based on love and trust, you’re instilling fear into your partner. [Read: Controlling vs Caring – A thin line controlling people love to cross]

4. There’s too much jealousy going on

Jealousy is never a good look on anyone, and yet, it’s a common reason why relationships fail. Maybe you’re the jealous one and you keep checking their phone or their social media accounts to see if they’re talking to anyone else. This could also work vice versa.

Trust is the foundation of any relationship so you can’t let your jealousy consume you to the point that it’s destroying your relationship. Learn to have faith in them unless you have evidence to believe otherwise. [Read: Why am I so jealous? How to find the hidden reasons and fix it]

5. Selfishness

Okay, you shouldn’t even be shocked that selfishness is on this list. You can’t always get what you want, and neither can your partner. Both of you need to learn to compromise for one another’s needs. Selfishness is one of the most common reasons why relationships fail.

You need to find the middle ground of what both of you want. If neither of you are willing to compromise to make your relationship work, then you can both find someone who’ll be more accommodating to your every want and need. [Read: 12 clear signs you’re being selfish in the relationship]

6. Nitpicking each other’s flaws

Everyone has flaws and imperfections, and that’s okay. We don’t always accept our partner’s flaws, but that doesn’t mean you should put them down every chance you get. Relationships are also about support and encouragement, so you can’t keep breaking them apart like that.

How would you feel if the same was done to you? Not only will you slowly pick at their self-esteem, but you might also push them towards the arms of someone who’s much more accepting of their faults.

7. Lack of time

Quality time is such an important love language, it’s amusing how people still fail to realize this by now. Failing to spend time with your partner is a core reason why relationships fail. Even if you both have a busy lifestyle, you still need to set aside time for each other just to keep the relationship going.

It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture – it could be a simple date or even a home-cooked dinner with both of your phones down. Also, no, it doesn’t count as quality time if you’re both distracted doing your own things.

If you don’t spare even a few minutes for your partner, neglect starts and that will definitely eat away at your relationship. [Read: How much time should couples spend together to stay happy in love?]

8. Lack of effort

While effort isn’t the basis of a relationship, it’s how you show someone how much you love them. Without effort, how else are they supposed to feel they matter? We’re not talking about some grand gesture of you throwing rocks at their window *this isn’t a Nicholas Sparks novel!*

We’re talking actual effort in a relationship like sacrificing your time for them or visiting them after work. Doing a little something extra from time to time shows your partner that you would still go the extra mile, no matter how long you’ve been dating. [Read: The 25 sweetest romantic gestures for everyday life]

9. Physical distance

Not all couples are destined to make it through long-distance relationships. If you haven’t experienced this, it’s one of the worst things you can experience. Even if you communicate every day, it’s still a different feeling to see them and be with them physically.

Unless you make an effort so you can finally be in the same zip code, these relationships usually break under the strain. This isn’t to say that all long-distance relationships fail – some do manage to make it work! Good for them! [Read: Does your long distance love have what it takes to survive the distance?]

10. Emotional distance

When you’re emotionally incompatible *i.e., one of you is more open while the other is withdrawn*, this can lead to a lot of unmet emotional needs. Having that wall and emotional distance is why relationships fail. No matter what you do, they seem far away and you don’t know how to fix it.

If one of you is aloof and the other is needy, then this imbalance can cause friction and resentment in the one who’s exerting more effort to feel more loved in return. There’s a difference between someone just going through something *like grief or loss* and someone who’s naturally distant and unattached.

11. Little lies that build up

While white lies are common at the start of a relationship *especially when putting your best foot forward,* it’s important to be as honest and authentic as possible in a relationship.

Eventually, they’re going to find out the truth anyway. When these lies build up, they might spiral into a web of lies that you can no longer get out of. It’ll be a huge form of deception, even if it all just started from one little white lie about your ex or how much you earn. [Read: 7 reasons why most lovers lie and 7 ways to stop those lies]

12. Different goals

You need someone who has the same goals that you do. While you don’t necessarily need to be in the same career field, you need to have a similar vision for your future.

Maybe one of you wants kids and the other doesn’t – this is a major problem in your relationship. If left without compromise, the rift in your desires may end up causing a rift between the two of you.

13. Emotional baggage

It goes without saying that baggage will always affect your relationship. We all have our trauma and past baggage, but you can’t let that get in the way of your relationship. Maybe you’ve been cheated on in the past and this caused you to be emotionally withdrawn.

Or, maybe you came from a broken family, so you have abandonment issues. Unless you learn to deal with it healthily, it will manifest itself in your relationship from time to time. [Read: 25 relationship topics you both mUST talk about to understand each other]

14. Lack of positive support from friends or family

You’re not in a relationship with your partner’s friends and family, but they are somewhat responsible for who your partner is. When they don’t support your relationship, it can turn into one of the big reasons why relationships fail. Especially in an argument, it’s obvious they’ll take your partner’s side if they already don’t like you from the start.

If they’re not supportive of your relationship, they can end up giving love advice that ends with breaking up. The worst part? You might actually agree with them. [Read: 13 obvious signs your friends and family are ruining your relationships for you]

15. Lack of empathy

This might go hand-in-hand with selfishness, but you need empathy to make a relationship work. It’s one of the ways to validate your partner’s feelings and show them that you care about them.

Without empathy, it’s easy to assume the person is cold-hearted and incapable of love. Empathy makes you feel heard, understood, and most importantly, loved. You can’t make a relationship last without this.

16. Opposing morals and values

Everyone has a different set of beliefs. Maybe you’re more religious and conservative, and your partner is the exact opposite. Your relationship isn’t going to last the way you expect when you have opposing values. We know they say that opposites attract, but this doesn’t apply to your morals and values.

They make you who you are, so you need someone who shares the same beliefs you do *well, the majority of them*. Otherwise, you’ll always end up clashing and values are the one thing you should never compromise for anyone.

17. Lack of compatibility

Compatibility isn’t something you can build – you either have it or you don’t. You can’t work on compatibility as some couples take years and even decades to figure out they never had compatibility in the first place.

This isn’t abot sharing the same interests, but about sharing a similar energy and mindset. [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly!]

18. Financial problems

Finances are a much common conflict than you realize in relationships. When you struggle with financial problems that never get resolved, this will end in a breakup.

It’s not necessarily a debt issue, but also more along the lines of who spends more and who earns more. [Read: How to talk about money with your partner without fighting about it]

19. Different sex drives

Sexual compatibility is a real thing and the lack of it is another common reason why relationships fail. When you’re not sexually compatible with your partner, this can result in never being satisfied in any physical engagement.

What’s worse is that you’re so incompatible sexually that you refuse to do it altogether. Sex is essential in any relationship and without it, a relationship can easily fall apart.

20. Different working levels

Some people are naturally workaholics and that’s okay, but they need someone who’s either okay with that or is also a workaholic themselves.

This can be an issue when someone wants them to spend more time on dates or doesn’t understand the demand of their work. It’s an underrated reason why relationships fail, but it happens. [Read: Dating a workaholic: how to do It & maintain a happy relationship]

21. Toxic relationships

By definition, a toxic relationship isn’t just a physically abusive one. It also refers to manipulation, gaslighting, or any form of mental or emotional abuse. If by any way they manipulate you into doing what you never wanted to do, that’s already abuse. Unfortunately, toxic relationships happen more commonly than you think. [Read: The 15 types of toxic relationships to watch out for]

22. Lack of commitment

It’s possible for people to get into relationships just because they don’t want to be alone or they want someone to constantly talk to. However, these aren’t adequate reasons for getting into a relationship.

You date someone because you’re ready to find someone to complement your life and because you care about them. [Read: How to commit to a relationship & show your partner you’re serious]

23. Lack of maturity

Age isn’t a concrete basis for maturity any longer. Just because you’re older than your partner, doesn’t make you automatically more mature. That lack of maturity can easily cause conflicts in relationships and it’ll be obvious when arguments and responsibility are needed.

When someone refuses to own up to their faults or doesn’t take action for their desired results, it’s an obvious sign of a lack of maturity. [Read: 20 traits to look for in someone to instantly know if they’re emotionally mature]

24. Anger issues

Anger issues are a real component of why relationships fail. If one of you grew up in a healthy environment where anger was expressed through a calm conversation, it would completely freak them out if they’re with someone who punches walls and yells when they’re angry.

This is also another one of the underrated aspects that lead to a relationship falling apart. When your way of expressing anger isn’t similar to your partner’s, you’ll always clash. You might even give your partner an anxiety attack every time you yell without even knowing it. [Read: 10 ways to handle dating someone with anger issues]

25. Apathy

Lastly, apathy is the final straw that destroys relationships altogether. It comes from resentment, neglect, selfishness, and a whole lot of other factors mentioned above.

When the relationship is beyond repair that you just feel numb, that’s when it’s already over. You know that the relationship is done, no matter how much damage control you do.

So, why does a relationship fail?

A relationship doesn’t just fail overnight without any concrete warning. It starts with a simple fight or misunderstanding and it leads to neglect. Without you knowing, they’re already halfway out the door.

[Read: 16 overlooked secrets to a perfectly happy relationship]

If you know the reasons why relationships fail, perhaps you can prevent it from falling apart before it does. A relationship can last a lifetime, just as long as you take care of it and do the work to make it last.

The post Why Relationships Fail: 25 Reasons Why Love Can Fall Apart Entirely is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Tuesday, 10 August 2021

List of Sexualities: 15 Gender Orientations You Need To Know About

It’s so important to have proper knowledge when it comes to the list of sexualities. Otherwise, you could potentially mislabel someone and offend them.

List of Sexualities

With the list of sexualities today, it can be both confusing and overwhelming to differentiate one sexuality from another. Don’t worry – you’re not alone in this confusion. While you may not identify with any certain orientation, this list of sexualities can help you realize just how other people feel.

Everyone wants to feel like they belong. We want to feel understood. Wouldn’t you feel misunderstood if someone misidentified your sexuality?

This is why you need to do your part in understanding the different sexualities. For a long time, many people felt isolated because the way they felt wasn’t being recognized. However, sexuality is a huge topic nowadays and more and more people are understanding their own feelings by connecting with certain sexualities they can relate to.

Not only this, but people are actually promoting gender equality all over the world – thus the existence of the annual Pride March. Even if you’re straight, it’s important to learn the list of sexualities so that you don’t unintentionally hurt or offend someone.

[Read: Romantic orientation – The different kinds and how each of them are different from the other]

Being informed when it comes to sexual orientation

You don’t need to belong to the LGBTQ+ community to expose yourself to the list of sexualities. Even if someone else feels differently than you, knowing how they feel and what they’re interested in can help you understand them on a deeper level. You might not understand their sexuality, but at least acknowledge who they are.

There’s far too much ignorance when it comes to sexual orientation. Ignorance is no longer a valid excuse for misidentifying someone’s sexuality. Especially with how the world promotes gender equality, it’s up to us to be aware of the existing sexualities today. [Read: What does the Q in LGBTQ really mean?]

A list of sexualities so you can understand each orientation

For those of you who are clueless about any other sexual orientation other than straight, gay, or bisexual, this list of sexualities is for you. There are so many sexualities than what meets the eye. Some you may already know, while others you may not recognize.

1. Straight – heterosexual

It’s impossible to not be aware of this sexuality. Heterosexuality refers to being attracted to the opposite sex. There’s probably not a single person that hasn’t heard of heterosexuality or being straight. You’ll see this when a man is attracted to a woman and a woman is attracted to a man.

2. Lesbian

Most of you are aware of what a lesbian is. For those of you who don’t know, it’s when a woman is attracted to another woman, but don’t feel the same attraction towards a man. They have a desire to be with a woman in a romantic way, as well.

They also classify under homosexuality as by definition, homosexuality refers to being attracted to the same gender. If you’re a woman and you’re attracted physically or romantically to another woman but not a man, you’re a lesbian. [Read: How to know if you’re a lesbian – Is it curiosity or something more?]

3. Gay

Similar to lesbian, generally, gay refers to a man being attracted to another man. This term is also grouped under homosexuals as they’re attracted to or get together with the same gender. When someone is gay, they want to have a life with the same gender and are attracted to men only.

4. Bisexual

We all know homosexuals and heterosexuals exist, but a bisexual is a combination of the two. You can be attracted to both men and women at the same time. Whether physically or romantically, both genders appeal to them.

A lot of people tend to think that bisexuality isn’t real and is just a phase, but it’s very much real. They can be sexually and romantically involved with men and women and be happy. [Read: Are you bisexual? How to understand your true desires]

5. Pansexual

Now we’re getting into the part of this list of sexualities not everyone is familiar with. Pansexual refers to being attracted not to the gender, but the personality of someone.

For instance, you could find yourself attracted to an asexual, bisexual, or heterosexual for their personalities entirely without any regard for their sexuality. They are attracted to the person at their core and it’s not dependent on their gender at all. [Read: What is pansexual? The full guide to everything you must know about them]

6. Polysexual

This term is actually very much like pansexual, but not quite as expansive. You can identify as a polysexual if you’re attracted to multiple genders. For instance, you could be attracted to most of the genders on this list, which means you’re a polysexual.

They like more than just men and women, but their preferences are still limited. This doesn’t also imply that they’re attracted to everyone, but they’re still picky about who they get together with.

7. Asexual

This sexuality may be hard for many of us to understand, but it’s very important to know and be informed about it. In this list of sexualities, not everything revolves around sex. This is specifically true for asexuals as they don’t feel the need to engage in physical intimacy or sex with anyone at all.

They have no desires when it comes to sex. However, they do still have romantic desires unrelated to sex. They could have romantic feelings for someone without wanting to have sex with them.

They’re also one of the most misunderstood sexualities in the world. Although let’s face it – almost every sexuality in this list is misunderstood, one way or another. [Read: 15 signs you’re asexual and don’t like getting laid as much as others]

8. Demisexual

Most people who are demisexual actually don’t realize it at first. Many believe they’re asexual until they meet that special person who makes them feel a sexual desire. It’s possible for you to assume you’re asexual your entire life until you meet that one person who changes your perspective.

You didn’t change sexualities overnight, but maybe you’ve always been a demisexual all along. Demisexual individuals can’t experience real sexual desire unless they have a strong emotional attraction and connection with someone.

In this sense, demisexuals can’t engage in casual sex, flings, one-night stands, or any type of physical intimacy without a real connection. [Read: How demisexuals feel lust and the best ways for someone to connect with them]

9. Graysexual

This term definitely falls under the asexual umbrella. As a graysexual, you feel sexual desire at very random and unusual circumstances.

In fact, even you can’t tell the specific timing or circumstance of when you’ll want that kind of connection. They can only feel sexual desire under certain conditions or even only at random times here and there. [Read: Identifying with being graysexual in a world of sex]

10. Queer

This is one of the genders in this list of sexualities that refer to any sexual orientation that is not heterosexual. It can also refer to those who don’t classify as any sexuality at all. If you don’t identify as any gender in particular, you might be queer.

11. Autosexual

This type of sexuality is when someone can only be sexually aroused by themselves. They satisfy themselves sexually by masturbating and don’t have sexual desire for anyone else.

This might seem strange and unusual for you, but it’s definitely a sexuality. If you’re one, you’re not as asexual as you think you are, but you’re autosexual. The experience of masturbation seems ultimately different to you.

12. Androsexual

Someone who identifies as androsexual is sexually attracted to men and those with masculine features. We know what you’re thinking – that they’re only attracted to men. However, this isn’t true.

Both men and women are capable of having masculine features so whoever they are, as long as they have masculine features, that’s who an androsexual gets attracted to.

This might be one of the confusing genders in this list of sexualities, but the earlier you understand it, the better. [Read: 20 sexually enlightning movies that are all about different sexualities]

13. Gynosexual

When someone identifies as gynosexual, they have a sexual attraction to women and those who have feminine features. Basically, it’s the opposite of the sexuality we explained above.

Again, similar to the concept of androsexuality, they’re attracted to anyone who posses feminine features, whether man or woman. Anybody who is attracted to women can also be attracted to men and other genders that appear to be very feminine in nature.

14. Homoflexible

The idea that your sexuality can be flexible goes against what other people find comfortable. However, homoflexible is very real. If you categorize under this sexuality, your sexuality deserves to be acknowledged and heard just like the other sexualities in this list.

Those who are homoflexible may primarily be attracted to their own gender, however, they will sometimes have a sexual attraction to the opposite gender as well. [Read: What it means to be sexually fluid in the dating world]

15. Heteroflexible

Sexuality is a flexible concept and only you should be able to define what you identify as, and that’s where we have heteroflexibility.

It’s when someone typically has heterosexual desires but occasionally find themselves sexually attracted to those of the same gender. Their heterosexual desires are flexible.

 [Read: Pansexual confessions – what it’s really like to be one]

So, which of the list of sexualities do you resonate with the most?

Sexuality can be confusing and overwhelming espceially when you know more than just a few! In fact, the 15 sexualities in this list are merely the tip of the iceberg. There are several more sexualities you might’ve not heard of.

Being informed of the list of sexualities can help you connect with others better. It’s also a bonus that your known sexuality might be different from who you really are.

The post List of Sexualities: 15 Gender Orientations You Need To Know About is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



I Hate My Boyfriend: Why You Hate Him & 13 Ways to Get Him to End It

When you find yourself saying, “I hate my boyfriend” often, this could be an indicator that a relationship is over. Read this to know how to break up.

I Hate My Boyfriend

The minute you enter a relationship, you never assume that you’ll hear yourself say, I hate my boyfriend. You enter a relationship because you see the chance for love, the potential in him and that he makes you happy.

However, life can easily get in the way of this. Whether it’s because of resentment or unresolved issues, thinking I hate my boyfriend is never a good sign no matter how you see it.

Unfortunately, if you feel this way, you might also need to break it off with him. After all, why would you stay in a relationship with someone you hate – which is a very strong emotion.

Breaking up is never easy, but it might make things more bearable to make him break up with you instead.

Hold on! Do you really hate him?

We aren’t trying to be condescending or downplaying the bad qualities of your boyfriend. But do you really hate him? Do you hate him because you feel repulsed by him every second of every day? Or do you think you hate him right now because he’s let you down and you’re annoyed with him?

They’re both just not the same thing. In one scenario, you need to end things with him because there is no future with him.

On the other less-harmful one, you’re probably ranting and annoyed with him today. And you know full well that everything’s going to be just perfect between you two in a few hours. if it’s just a minor annoyance, take a look at these 19 annoying things boyfriends do and see if it’s something most guys do.

But if you’ve put up with his behavior for a long time, and can’t put up with his shit anymore, well, it’s time to give this a serious thought and read on.

[Read: 13 annoying girlfriend habits that’ll make any guy hate his girl]

Why do you keep thinking I hate my boyfriend?

Here’s the thing – you’re not a bad person for thinking this way. If anything, this makes you just as human as everyone else. It’s okay to think you hate him and feel like you can’t stand being around him.

After all, there’s just a thin line that separates love and hate, and it’s easy for one to become another. When you think I hate my boyfriend, this might have a lot to do with unresolved resentment.

Maybe you didn’t talk about your issues enough or maybe he doesn’t treat you right. You need to remember that love doesn’t turn into hate overnight though. It’s something that starts slowly and creeps in so deep that you probably don’t even know when your emotions switched from passion to disgust.

You don’t necessarily hate him just because he didn’t wash the dishes today or because his flaws bothered you more than usual. It takes a lot of built-up repressed emotions for you to conclude that you hate your boyfriend. [Read: 22 big early warning signs of a bad boyfriend]

Should you end things with him?

If you think your issues are solvable, then by all means, don’t hesitate to repair what’s left of your relationship. The thoughts of I hate my boyfriend might be consuming you, but it doesn’t hurt to try.

However, if the hate is so consuming that you can’t even stand the thought of being around him, it’s best to end the relationship.

But have you ever experienced having to break up with a guy because you’re just not into him, he pisses you off all the freaking time, or you just don’t love him anymore? It’s hard, right? Do you ever wish he’ll just break up with you and spare you from anxiety and being the bad guy? If you’re saying, I hate my boyfriend, it is time for action!

Ah, but here’s the tricky part, isn’t it? You don’t really have any good reasons to break up with him! It might also make things easier to make him do the breaking up instead of the other way around.

[Read: How to get someone to break up with you because you’re just a big coward and a jerk]

How to get him to break up with you

If you’re having a hard time breaking up, and an even harder time staying in the relationship, get it all over and done with and make him think he’s the one who’s dumping you instead of the other way around.

You managed to face the truth and admit that you hate him – that’s a good first step. Use these steps to learn how to get him to dump you when the thoughts of I hate my boyfriend are all you can think of, 24/7!

Honestly, if you want to know the right way to break up with your boyfriend because you hate his guts and can’t stand him anymore, maybe the right thing to do is to have a real talk with him. But if you want to fantasize the worst ways to get him to break up with you, well, here’s everything you’ll ever need!

1. Put him on a pedestal

Or at least, make him believe so. Make it seem like you had a sudden revelation. And tell him you’re convinced he’s just way too good for you!

Even if you obviously don’t believe it, make him feel like he could do nothing wrong, and no matter how hard you try, your self-confidence just plummets to the floor every time you’re around him! Make him feel like he’s superior in the relationship and that you could never live up to what he deserves. Or at least, make him think that way.

Practice your lines as you tell him how much you don’t deserve him, that he deserves someone better, someone more sophisticated, more mature, more of everything you can never be.

Works best: for yuppie guys, older men, or guys who are generally overachievers and well-off in life. [Read: How to break up with a guy in a manner you won’t regret]

2. Cold shoulder, cold turkey

The silent treatment always works wonders in getting someone to break up with you. After all, what other choice do you have when they aren’t talking to you?

Don’t respond to his text messages, calls, or social media messages—better yet, just turn off your phone. In other words, you’d be ghosting him. This is your best option, especially if you really want to avoid that difficult confrontation on why you’re giving him the silent treatment.

Maybe you fell off the face of the earth, maybe you moved across the country – he wouldn’t be able to tell.

Works best: if you have already established a communication and date routine, or if the guy is clingy and needy. [Read: How to ghost someone when you’ve never ghosted anyone before]

3. Ex-factor

This strategy takes a lot of time to work the right way. Nobody likes it when they talk about their ex, do they?

Mention a little bit about where your ex used to work, and gradually talk about all your other exes and how this or that reminded you of them. You can even compare him to your ex.

This strategy isn’t obviously for everyone as it can be a little harsh all for the sake of getting your boyfriend to dump you. However, if you’re all out of options and you can’t tolerate any more thoughts of I hate my boyfriend, you could go for this one.

Works best: for guys who are insecure about your successful, rich, handsome, long-term exes. [Read: 17 big signs of a jealous and possessive boyfriend]

4. Name drop

While having sex, scream, “Yes, oh yes! Danny!” or mention some other guy’s name *like an ex or someone he knows from your office*.

Or, if he has a guy you know he’s jealous of, mention that name while you’re about to come. He’ll be blown out of his wits so much that he’ll really consider just bowing out. Bingo! *but he’s gonna really hate you for this!*

Works best: for practically all guys!

5. Forget looks

If you want to turn a guy off so much that he ends up breaking up with you, bring out the ugliest side of you. Forget about hygiene, be such a wierdo that he forgets why he’s dating you in the first place.

Don’t dress up or wear make-up, even when you’re going on a date with him. Bring out that uncaring, unsexy, unappetizing side of you.

You know, the side that always comes up when you’re alone and on your period and would rather be in your sweats eating ice cream and not taking a bath for days. Make him forget why he was ever attracted to you in the first place.

If you’re constantly thinking I hate my boyfriend, appearing unattractive is the best way to do get him to dump you. The bigger a slob you are, the faster he’ll run away from you.

Works best: for guys who are nitpicky, metrosexual, or superficial ones, or those who always compliment you on how pretty or sexy you are. [Read: 33 signs you look really unattractive even if no one else tells you that]

6. Forget special occasions

We all know how important remembering special occasions are in relationships, especially anniversaries, birthdays, and even Valentine’s Day. What you need to do is forget all these occasions ever matter and don’t wish him.

Even if you’re aware of the occasion, forget to greet him in every single one. If he expects you to show up with him at his parents’ anniversary, tell him you totally forgot or just admit that you don’t want to come.

Make him feel like what he finds important is trivial for you. After all, who wants to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t value the things you do?

Works best: on guys who are big on holidays and family.

7. Make him jealous

Jealousy is never a good look on a man, especially because it hurts their ego and pride. If you want him to do the dumping, make him jealous.

Especially if you can no longer deal with hating your boyfriend, jealousy is your best strategy. You’d be surprised how easy it is to actually make a man jealous. Nothing hurts a man’s ego more than if you make him feel inferior in front of another man.

Out in a bar having drinks? Flirt with the bartender. In an exhibit? Cozy up with the artist. In the supermarket? Wink and smile sexily at every guy that looks at you. Literally any guy will do, especially if he’s really cute and tall.

Works best: for almost every guy, especially the clingy ones and even the over-confident ones too. [Read: 25 tips to end a relationship without making it messy]

8. Go out with his best bud

You know what they say – the best way to frustrate someone is to go out with their best friend. Find out what you can about his best friend and when the time is right, catch the best friend alone and try getting frisky with him.

Try to get as close with him as possible and ask favors from him, if you want to be subtle. Ask him for favors, like if he can fix your plumbing, check out your car’s engine, accompany you shopping for gifts for your boyfriend – but end up flinging yourself on him.

Works best: because this is every guy’s worst nightmare. And the worst thing any girl can do!

9. Forget about sex

If there’s anything a man almost can’t live without, it’s sex. Every time he initiates, do your best to shut his attempts down. Tell him you’re tired or exhausted – and maintain that excuse consistently.

It’s no secret—men *and yes, women too* are highly sexual beings. They love to touch and be touched, kiss and be kissed.

If you really think I hate my boyfriend and want him to do the dumping, then don’t have sex with him. It’s as simple *and sometimes complicated* as that.

Use any excuse why you don’t want to have sex every time an opportunity comes. Maybe you’re too exhausted with work or maybe you’re just not in the mood.

Works best: if you used to always have sex or if he’s a very sexual person. [Read: Using sex as a weapon? 10 harsh truths you need to know]

10. Be extra clingy

If you want to see how reverse psychology works, then do the exact opposite of what makes him happy. Nobody likes feeling suffocated by their partner so if you really want the easiest way to make him dump you, bring out your clingiest side.

Be super clingy. Be the type who’d text him every 30 minutes and have a nervous breakdown if he doesn’t reply within two minutes of your last text. Make him feel like you miss him so much that you can’t stand even just a few delayed replies.

Send him hundreds of I-love-you’s and suffocate him with your need for attention and time. Being extra clingy is not attractive in a man’s perspective, which is all the more reason to do it.

You can even try arguing with him every time he doesn’t reciprocate your clinginess or give you the time of the day. [Read: 21 clingy girlfriend moves that’ll drive any guy far away]

11. Trash him

Sing and dance while sipping on your fruit smoothie and even if he thinks you’re hot shimmying all over the house, it all goes down when you spill your drink all over his computer, iPhone, game consoles, and collection of precious, precious Pokémon cards.

Especially if your boyfriend is a gamer, then this works even better for him. The majority of guys nowadays are such nerds for the technologies and gadgets they own.

If you can no longer stand your thoughts of I hate my boyfriend, then you can use this to your advantage.

Works best: for techie, geeky, gamer guys who spend hundreds of dollars on their gadgets and gizmos.

12. Make a scene

Nobody wants to be with someone who goes out of their way to make a scene and embarrass you. However, there’s no denying that it makes an effective strategy for getting him to dump you.

As we already know, men care a lot about their ego so when you manage to shatter it, then they’ll break up with you without even a second thought.

When you’re out for dinner, pretend you saw your boyfriend flirting with the waitress or another girl in the restaurant. If he denies it, slowly raise your voice until everyone starts to look. And that’s your cue.

Don’t be afraid to go all-out when making a scene. The more embarrassing, the better.

Works best: if you took acting lessons *or at least practiced in the mirror* and if he’s the silent, broody type of guy who doesn’t even like PDA.

13. Just say it

Lastly, the simplest way to get it done is to just say, “I hate my boyfriend.” There’s no getting around it when you say it straight to his face. Say you hate his guts and that his presence irritates you.

If he doesn’t believe you, say it again. You hate him. You hate how he just leaves his dirty clothes on the floor and not on the hamper, how he doesn’t open doors for you anymore, how he eyes other ladies like you’re not there, and how he just utterly annoys the living bejeezus out of you.

Say everything that you’ve been wanting to say about how you hate him and how it’s not something you can control.

Works best: for virtually every guy who you just learned to hate for being insensitive, callous pricks. [Read: Ways to reject somebody and what to expect afterward]

So, what do you do with your thoughts of I hate my boyfriend?

You can do a combo of two or three of the tips above at the same time. Go ahead. Act crazy. Remember that you’re not alone in feeling this way.

It doesn’t make you a bad person to feel something as intense as hate for your boyfriend. It might be overwhelming, but you never intended to feel this way.

In fact, this feeling might even astound you. However, if this feeling was caused by neglect or any action that made him mistreat you, then maybe he deserves everything that’s coming. After all, karma is a b*tch. [Read: 22 early warning signs of a bad boyfriend you should never ignore]

Also, you can always give him a cake that says, “I think we should see other people.” And then dump it on his face. In front of his buddies.

Before you make a graceful exit. THAT is always a good idea *especially if he cheated on you!*

[Read: How to break up with a guy without a messy struggle]

Guys pull the same tricks on us all the time, so it’s fair game. Why should you go easy on him just because you’ve been so nice and understanding? If you can’t take any more thoughts of I hate my boyfriend, feel free to use any of these tips.

The post I Hate My Boyfriend: Why You Hate Him & 13 Ways to Get Him to End It is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



Friday, 6 August 2021

Texting 101: Do Manipulative Texting Tactics Work?

manipulative texting tacticsIf a girl’s not responding over text, should you resort to “texting dirty”? While dirty texting tactics can work, there’s a better, non-dirty way to get a response than these.

A reader emailed in recently to ask my opinion on several texting tactics he'd come across. One was from a texting course called "The Scrambler", while the other is from a negotiation book that uses a tactic to force a "no."

Seduction advice often gets a bad rap as 'manipulation', even though most of it's not. I've talked about this several times over the years, including in "Is Seduction Wrong?" (also in "Do Bad Evil Seducer Men Corrupt Innocent Women?").

However, there's a kernel of truth in every stereotype, and the reason seduction so often gets classed as manipulation is because there are men out there who use dirty manipulation tactics.

They use these tactics because they CAN work... but there's a "but."

The "but" is that they don't work as well as superior non-manipulative tactics, and that even when they do work they tend to trigger resentment toward you.

Both the tactics our reader stumbled upon were tactics I consider negatively manipulative. I'll introduce you to them, talk about why they're negative, and discuss some alternatives in this piece.



 
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