How to Have Sex with Your Friend & Make Sure Things Don’t Get Weird

Is it possible to learn how to have sex with your friend without the entire friendship being affected for the worst? You’re on dangerous ground!

Understanding how to have sex with your friend without it getting weird really comes down to how close you are in the first place, and whether you have any intentions of it becoming anything more.

Sex is a weird thing, but so is friendship. Can the two ever go together without causing irreparable damage?

Honestly? Sometimes yes, but most of the time, no.

How likely are you to develop romantic feelings? You might think it won’t happen, but I promise you, when sex comes into the equation, romantic feelings have a habit of being not too far behind in many cases. Also, what page is your friend on? Do they feel the same? Do they have any unearthed feelings you might not know about?

[Read: 16 hush-hush signs your friend wants to sleep with you]

As you can see, you’re about to enter dangerous territory. You should know where you both are before you even consider seriously moving ahead with this. Not every sexual liaison between friends ends happily. Sure, some do.

Some even end up getting married while others put their encounter down to experience and something fun to look back on in years to come. For the most part however, sex between friends doesn’t often end well. [Read: Friend to lover – What you really need to know]

How to have sex with your friend and remain friends? Don’t do it lightly

I wouldn’t advise it. Sure, you can go ahead and ignore my thoughts if you want, but I’ve seen this happen time and time again. If you’re good friends, ask yourself whether it’s worth ruining it just for a night of fun. Because, that’s all it will be unless you want to take this to the next level and your friend feels exactly the same way too.

You have to understand the difference between two different types of feelings to navigate this situation without disaster: platonic feelings and romantic ones. If you have any romantic inclinations towards your friend, perhaps you used to before you became friends and you managed to bury them deep, then the chances of sex bringing those feelings back are quite high. [Read: The 14 pros and cons of being sex buddies with a friend]

Platonic feelings are between friends, i.e. there is no romantic inclination at all and you have no problems when your friend meets a partner. If that’s the case, there is a chance you COULD navigate the water of how to have sex with your friend without totally ruining the bond you have, but even then, you’re skating on thin ice.

Nobody has any clue what sex is going to do to your friendship until the deed is done. You might think you know, but sex can bring a maelstrom of feelings to the fore, ones which you might not even be aware that you have right now.

How will you deal with those afterwards? Will you be able to look at your friend in the same way ever again? How will you feel when they meet a new partner and move on? Will you be jealous? [Read: How does being friends with benefits really work out?]

When you’ve slept with someone even once, the chances of feeling a certain amount of protectiveness over that person is high. Sure, you have no reason to feel that way and no right to, because they’re free to do whatever they want, but will you be able to overcome how you feel and continue the friendship?

Friendships are precious

A true friendship is a precious thing. You shouldn’t even consider playing around with it. That’s my take on this situation. Figuring out how to have sex with your friend without it ruining the relationship really comes down to the two of you not being that close in the first place. [Read: How to handle sexual tension between friends like a platonic pro]

The reason? Because when it all becomes messy, you can’t look each other in the eye for a few weeks afterwards. And if you two aren’t good friend, it doesn’t matter as much, does it?

Now, please feel free to prove me wrong. I would love to learn stories of friends who have successfully navigated these murky waters and come out the other side closer and more solid than before. I’d even love to hear stories of friends who had one great night, only for it to make them both realize their love for one another. I’m a big fan of Monica and Chandler!

You see, I have first hand experience. A close friend of mind decided to do the deed with one of her other friends. They weren’t super close, but they were close enough. After that night, their contact dwindled, and they no longer speak. There was no major fall out, no huge confession of buried feelings and no harsh words spoken. They simply couldn’t look each other in the eye after seeing the other one naked! [Read: How to make up your mind before having sex with a best friend]

Apparently, the morning after was a total awkward-fest. My friend didn’t sleep with anyone else for a good while afterwards because of the memory.

I’m not suggesting that’s going to happen to you, but let’s be honest… it’s possible. Sex is complicated enough. What are you going to do if something untoward happens? I mean, we can all be as safe as we can be, but accidents happen sometimes.

Do you really want end up being the parent to a child neither of you planned? Of course, if you choose to do it, be safe. I mean, really, really safe. That should go without saying. [Read: How to end a friend’s with benefits relationship and stay friends]

Consider your future feelings

How will you feel in the future when your friend dates other people? Will it cause you to feel that jealousy I mentioned earlier? Jealousy has a habit of wreaking havoc on relationships and friendships, ruining them and causing an air of darkness. It’s really hard to come back from that.

To me, friendship is worth far more than a night of passion. If that’s what you really want, choose someone you’re not that close to. Someone who you’re able to shrug your shoulders and move on from if it doesn’t work out. Understanding how to have sex with your friend is packed with so many potential problems that it’s enough to make your head spin. [Read: Sleeping with a friend – A no-regrets guide to doing it right]

Of course, the best case scenario is that you both feel a little weird afterwards. You’ve seen each other naked. Can you look at them again and not have flashbacks of the night you shared, whether it was amazing for all the right reasons or terrible for awkward reasons you’d rather not recall?

You might think I have a total downer on this idea, and to be honest, I do. Friendships are hard enough. When you add nakedness and orgasms into the mix, the whole thing can easily become a situation that makes you cringe at the memory, and not something to make you smile. [Read: How to stay friends after having sex with a friend]

You’re supposed to be relaxed and happy around your friends. How can you be that if you’re trying your best not to remember that awkward sound one of you made in the middle of it, or the embarrassing sex face your friend seems to have?

There are some things in a friendship you really can’t come back from!

[Read: 14 rules for sleeping with friends you should never overlook if you decide to sleep with them]

Learning how to have sex with your friend is an art form. It involves the ability to completely separate your feelings, and, if possible, turn them off completely.

The post How to Have Sex with Your Friend & Make Sure Things Don’t Get Weird is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

11 Things Women Want in a Man (Their Insults Tell You)

Women can tell you what things they want in a man… if you listen to their choice of insults. Things they might never admit consciously come spilling out.

Well, there you are online, minding your own business commenting on something, when what appears but a wild Angry Female Commentator!

And boy is she miffed!

She pulls out a few select stingers from her bag of Mean Things To Say, and ouch, they hurt!

You retreat to lick your wounds, smarting from a quick blast of pointed verbal abuse from some woman you don't know, who disagreed with what you had to say.

It's a not-uncommon scenario guys run into on the Internet. Sometimes in real life, too.

Even if you're more 'lurker' than 'participant', you've no doubt seen scads of men shredded by Angry Female Commentators in various comment sections of various websites... or at various parties or other social events.

'Small penis', 'lives at home', 'just a misogynist', and various other slanderous/libelous statements are such aggravated women's stock-in-trade.

However, if you look behind the words, there's an interesting psychological curiosity people communicate when they launch their insults.

That is this: we only insult people on measures we personally care about.

Put another way, by looking at women's insults, we can get a view to what things women want in a man... and also what they don't.

How to Stay Motivated during Quarantine: We Can Do This!

We’re all learning to live with a massive adjustment due to the coronavirus. Part of that is figuring out how to stay motivated during quarantine.

I cannot tell you how many friends, family members, and strangers I have seen on social media asking how to stay motivated during quarantine. And it doesn’t come as a shock.

When we are home, we settle into our comfort zone. After all, home is where we relax after work and on weekends. Even if you regularly work from home as I do, being home during all of your off-hours just hits a different way.

When your bed or couch is in sight, it is easy to melt into the cushions and get absorbed into a new TV series. And for the first few days, that may have felt like a much-needed break.

The thing is, too much lounging in the same location can feel depressing. Doing nothing puts us in a rut that can be hard to break out of. Therefore, everyone and their aunt is looking for ways to stay motivated during quarantine.

[Read: How to stay positive and find the silver lining]

Should you be motivated during quarantine?

Like most of you, after a few weeks of quarantine, the novelty of endless Netflix and pajamas wore off. You can only do so much laying around. For those of us that want to feel productive and accomplished, we need something to break us out of our lazy rut.

With that being said, we are going through a worldwide pandemic. This is traumatic. Whether you have been personally affected by the virus or find the constant stream of news overwhelming, it is okay.

This is a time that will go down in history. This is a time filled with anxiety and fear for our health, our loved ones, our livelihoods, and our futures.

It is okay to feel like doing nothing. There is nothing wrong with doing the bare minimum right now. Anyone who expects you to take up a new hobby or accomplish a life-long goal just because you’re home is either really good at compartmentalizing *or doesn’t understand the magnitude of what’s happening*.

[Read: How to take care of yourself emotionally and avoid falling apart]

If you truly want something productive to focus on instead of the news, then this is the article for you. But, if you feel worried and unable to focus on learning a new language, that is perfectly normal. You are doing so much just by staying home.

Just because some people on social media are remodeling their house or rebuilding car engines, it doesn’t mean you reaching a new level on Animal Crossing isn’t also an accomplishment.

Do not let the internet guilt or shame you for your quarantine routine. We are all just surviving in our own way. Whether you bake bread from scratch or switch from day pajamas to night pajamas.

[Read: Mantras to live by and that will transform your life for good]

How to stay motivated during quarantine

Now that you have been enlightened to the fact that you do not have to stay motivated during quarantine, nor should you feel guilty about that, here are the tips on how to stay motivated for those going stir-crazy.

#1 Get outside. Fresh air really does change everything. It perks you up. It energizes you. Whether you go for a walk while remaining six feet away from others, do some gardening in your yard, or just open a window to let a breeze into your place, this can give you that push you need.

The power of fresh air shouldn’t be ignored or overlooked. I am not saying you should go for a run or plant a garden, but just sitting outside for a few minutes every day will boost your mood. [Read: How to fight loneliness while self isolating during a pandemic]

#2 Do what you normally do. If possible, stick to your normal routine. Wake up at the same time, make your bed, shower, even pack your lunch for work, even if you’re working from the kitchen table.

Just go through the motions of applying makeup, styling your hair or changing into actual clothes. It can remind your subconscious that there is work to do, and you are prepared to do it.

#3 Make a to-do list. I know it sounds cheesy, but to-do lists make such a difference in how accomplished you feel at the end of each day. I have been making to-do lists at least once a week for years. This not only reminds me to get certain tasks done but it feels great to check things off.

Put even small things on your list like changing a light bulb or replacing the batteries in the remote. You can even add things you normally do like showering or laundry to remind yourself that you’re getting more done than you think. [Read: Don’t stay stuck – 16 strategies to get your shit together]

#4 Spruce up your space. It is spring after all. Spring cleaning doesn’t have to go out the window just because you can’t. Yes, that was a quarantine joke. Do everything from surface cleaning to scrubbing the floors and vacuuming under the couch will breathe life into your place.

Of course, we should be cleaning common places repeatedly anyway, like doorknobs, railings, and light switches, but going above and beyond will help you enjoy your space more. Instead of feeling trapped at home, sprucing things up by cleaning, organizing, and even rearranging can make you enjoy it more.

#5 Check in with friends and family. Although you may feel lonely, you are not alone. Everyone is going through this huge adjustment. Talking to friends and family about how you feel, and hearing from them can remind you that we are all still finding a new normal.

Also, checking in can help you feel motivated during quarantine so you have something to share. Without going out or interacting with others, topics of conversation are in short supply. If you get things done, you can fill your friends in on how you painted a feature wall with every random color of paint you had in your house. [Read: How to handle social distancing from your partner without feeling lonely]

#6 Do a group activity *if possible*. If you live with others, do something to help motivate you because now you have others relying on you. Play board games, create an obstacle course, or even join the rest of the world and film a TikTok dance.

Enjoy the company you do have! It is great for your mood and maintaining hope in such an uncertain time. [Read: How to get your life together with rituals to live your best life]

#7 Challenge yourself. If you are competitive by nature, this will be perfect for you. Challenge yourself to accomplish something each day or week. Cut a minute off of your run time or wake up 10 minutes earlier each day.

You can also do this with your friends or roommates. Text each other your week’s goal and check in and remind each other. This will help you stick to your goals. When you have accountability, you can’t think your way out of.

#8 Make plans. Obviously, you can’t go out to eat with friends, but you can have a virtual cocktail hour or even a video game party. Make plans for a group of friends to all log on to a video chat at the same time with their drink of choice and share your weekly gossip.

Having something to look forward to will help you stay motivated in quarantine. You’ll want to finish any tasks so you can relax with your friends. [Read: How to keep your relationship going while self isolating]

#9 Acknowledge the small stuff. Instead of guilting yourself for not doing more, be proud of the small stuff. Washing your hair, heating up a frozen pizza, and finishing that three-hour movie may seem insignificant. Applaud yourself for even those things that will most boost your morale. [Read: 11 ways to spread the love to those who need it]

#10 Do something for others. If you can’t work up the strength or willpower to get motivated for yourself, do it for others. Find a simple sewing guide and learn how to sew masks for frontline workers. Start a Facebook group for anyone wanting to share positive news during this time.

Help out your elderly or immunocompromised neighbors by cutting their lawn, getting them groceries, or even picking up their prescriptions.

[Read: 5 ways volunteer work can help heal depression]

Figuring out how to stay motivated during quarantine is probably not something you ever thought you’d be worrying about. But it is our reality now, and you can do it.

The post How to Stay Motivated during Quarantine: We Can Do This! is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

30 Best Happy 1st Birthday Wishes For Babies

Happy 1st Birthday It’s not important that you remember this message, only that you have a happy 1st birthday! I’m so glad you were born one year ago today! I…

The post 30 Best Happy 1st Birthday Wishes For Babies appeared first on Events Greetings.

How to Be Mean to People Without Turning Into a Mean Person

Sometimes we all need to stand out for ourselves and demand the respect we deserve. It can be hard, but learning how to be mean is an art form.

If you want to be respected, sometimes you need to stand up for yourself and avoid becoming a doormat. And sometimes, that means learning how to be mean to people.

We’re told that if we’re mean, we’re nasty. We’re told that if we help others too much, we’re being taken advantage of because we don’t give ourselves the time we need.

It’s a hard balance to find, but it’s entirely possible to learn how to be mean without allowing it to change your character.

[Read: 16 reasons why people find it so easy to take you for granted]

Why should you learn how to be mean?

It might sound negative to talk about learning how to be mean, but sometimes it’s necessary. Being mean doesn’t always have to be a negative thing, provided you know when to use the skill and when not to. You should not go around being mean to everyone all the time, because that means you’re a generally mean person and nobody likes that type of person!

You should learn how to be mean because it helps you gain respect, it helps you settle for what you deserve and not for what you don’t deserve. It helps people to look up to you and see that you’re able to stand up for yourself when you need to, but it also means that you’re able to be soft and gentle when you need to be too. [Read: How to say no, stand up for yourself and feel awesome]

If you’re someone who is always helping others, that’s a great thing. But you need to find the balance which allows you to have time for yourself also. Always being there for everyone else means you’re not there for yourself. It means you’re allowing yourself to suffer silently, and it means that others may see you as a doormat when you deserve to be someone who is tiptoed around, not stamped upon!

Learning how to be mean isn’t a negative thing. It’s a necessity, but it comes with one particular condition – know how to know when the time is right to use your new skills and always know your motivation. [Read: How to stand up for yourself without being run over by others]

What does being mean look like?

Being mean for the right reasons and for the wrong reasons look very different to one another. When you’re mean for the wrong reasons you’re nasty, toxic, and you have no real reason for your actions other than to cause hurt and pain to someone else. However, when you learn how to be mean for the right reasons, the picture looks completely different.

Being mean for a positive reason looks like this:

– You stand tall and watch your posture

– Your body language is strong and positive

– You do not use words that are directed to hurt someone, and instead you use language which is firm and states your purpose

– You know the reasons why you are being mean in the first place

[Read: How to be dominant – 15 calm and easy ways to be the real alpha]

In many ways, you’re not actually being mean, you’re being strong. Standing up for yourself isn’t something you do for the hell of it, it’s something you do because you have to. If you avoid this every single time it’s necessary, you’re allowing others to take advantage of you. As a result, they’ll use you and hurt you without thinking about it. Basically, if you don’t stand up for yourself, others will be mean to you, but in a negative way.

Being mean for the right reasons means saying “no” when you need to, refusing to do something which another person wants you to do, because it doesn’t fit in with your reasons or your time plan. It means telling someone when they’re treating you badly and it means standing up for another person, e.g. standing up to a bully who is hurting someone else. It might also mean calling someone out when they’re acting badly in general.

As you can see, learning how to be mean for the right reasons isn’t actually mean at all, it’s doing the right thing. [Read: What makes someone a pushover and how to avoid being one]

The reason we assume it to be mean is because we’re so used to going along with what everyone else wants and needs, and we rarely give enough time or thought to ourselves. As a result, we think that if we say “no” or tell someone when we don’t like what they’re doing, we’re being nasty or causing pain to another person. Of course we’re not, we’re actually doing something which needs to be done in order to restore a balance.

Never allow being mean to change who you are

Learning how to be mean and standing up for yourself is fantastic and it will give you a great amount of confidence, but it also comes with one particular side effect – the risk of allowing it to change who you are.

There are times when you can be mean and times when you shouldn’t be. There are times when you should be understanding, empathic, and gentle, and there are many times when you should be a little harder and firm. Understanding the right time for each approach is important. [Read: How to be firm but not hurt people’s feelings – The 20 golden rules you must know]

The likelihood is that when you start standing up for yourself and saying “no” at necessary times, you’ll feel a power rush. It’s quite heady and addictive and it can be that you want to do it more and more. Of course, go for it when the time is right, but do not allow it to become an addiction that you crave. Power can be extremely dangerous when used too much or when used incorrectly in general.

The best advice is this – before you decide on your approach, i.e. whether you’re going to be mean or not, ask yourself whether there is real benefit in it or not. Would you like it if someone did the same to you? Would it be justified? Is there another approach, perhaps one that is better?

Ask yourself these questions and if you still feel that you need to actually show a harder, meaner side to your character on this occasion, go for it.

Once it’s done, take a deep breath and go back to your gentle self. You are not a nasty or negative person because you had to tell someone they were out of order, or you had to say “no” to something that another person asked you to do, or was coercing you to do against your will. You’re simply placing importance on your own time. [Read: 20 signs you’re a people pleaser and just don’t realize it]

Learning how to be mean doesn’t equate to you being a generally mean or toxic person, it simply means that you know what you’re worth and you’re not ashamed to stand up for yourself and demand that respect when it’s not being shown to you.

Everyone deserves respect, it’s a basic human right, but you do need to be sure that your demands for respect and attention are within balance with who you are and what you’ve done. You can’t demand respect from someone if you’re not showing the same to them. [Read: Martyr complex – Are you intentionally hurting yourself to feel like a martyr?]

Ask yourself these questions and explore your motivation before deciding. You shouldn’t go around being mean all the time, simply when you need to be. This will give you that respect because people will know that you’re a good person, someone who is kind and approachable, but you’re also not someone who is going to take any rubbish or disrespect from anyone else too. That’s the sign of a strong person – someone who knows their worth.

Leaning to be a little mean and firm now and then isn’t something to be ashamed of, but it is something you should use sparingly and with caution. Choosing the right time will create the maximum impact and will give you the respect that others may be lacking right now.

[Read: How to recognize an emotionally bully and learn to stand up to them]

Learning to say “no” when others are placing unnecessary demands upon your time is also something we should all be more comfortable doing, and if that takes learning how to be mean in order to tick that box, well, so be it.

The post How to Be Mean to People Without Turning Into a Mean Person is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

12 Key Moments in a Relationship that Predict Your Future Together

Each relationship is different but there are moments that move you forward and bring you closer together. Have you had these key moments in a relationship? 

Your relationship is full of moments, both good and bad. You have fights. You cuddle. You kiss. But, which of those are key moments in a relationship?

Which of those moments changed things for you? Which jump-started your feelings? Which moment solidified your relationship. What made you feel more secure?

These are the key moments in a relationship. They will happen at different times and in different ways for everyone, but knowing if they’ve happened or not can help you know where your relationship is.

[Read: The 9 stages in a relationship every single couple MUST go though together]

Are there always key moments in a relationship?

Almost always, yes. For some, they will be more obvious or romantic but for others, they may be more subtle.

On The Bachelor, you’ll have hometown dates, overnights & then meeting the parents. But most real-life relationships aren’t that clear cut.

The key moments in a relationship for you might be in a different order or just completely different. It depends on a lot.

Were you friends before you got together? Maybe you met each other’s parents years ago. Did you work together? Maybe you traveled together for work or went on a spontaneous trip before becoming “official”.

There is no right or wrong way to have a relationship. As long as you are communicating and on the same page, your key moments are whatever works for you.

[Read: 10 relationship milestones and when they should happen]

What are the key moments in a relationship?

Even though every relationship differs dramatically, there are some key moments in a relationship that change things.

This list is not a checklist and none of these moments are required. But these are some of the most common key moments in a relationship that can help define where you are and where you’re going together.

Experiencing these things together can push your relationship in the right direction and give you a lot of insight into the future you may have together. So, being able to spot the key moments in a relationship is certainly beneficial. [Read: 13 relationship mistakes new couples make all the time]

#1 First stay-at-home date. Sure, your first date is quite a step, same with your first kiss, but the first comfy date means a lot more. This is the first time you’re truly alone together in private. Whether you made him dinner or she picked the perfect movie, this is an intimate date.

This is when things either go south or move closer. Are you comfortable? Do you want to cuddle or get out of there ASAP? This date is when you start to really see something with this person or not because you’ll probably be doing this a whole lot more than going out.

#2 Meeting the pet or best friend. If your best friend or pet doesn’t care for your significant other, it can really cause a rift between you. If this meeting goes well, the confidence you have in the relationship will likely soar.

After this, the nerves tend to lessen when you invite each other to group events and hangouts. It says that everyone will be cool hanging out together.

#3 Realizing they listened to you. This is something a lot of people don’t pinpoint as a key moment in a relationship, but it really is. You can talk all day with your partner but it often goes in one ear and out the other. When they repeat something back to you, especially when you thought they were zoned out or that it wasn’t important, it means something. [Read: 15 signs of a lack of respect in a relationship that’s never good for you]

This could be that you mentioned your favorite indie movie that you can’t find on a streaming platform and they found an old DVD of it.

For me, it was mentioning that I prefer watching TV & movies with subtitles and then every time my boyfriend started a movie he would put them on for me. It meant a lot that he remembered something so minor.

#4 Running errands together. This is such a major milestone for any relationship. If you can enjoy doing the boring, mundane, and frankly, annoying stuff together, that is what you want. You want a relationship with someone who isn’t just good at romantic gestures and date nights but also the everyday stuff that you are usually consumed with.

Knowing that even your most dull day is made better by being with this person pushes your relationship forward. It lets you know you don’t always have to be on or excited but that you can just be together doing anything and enjoy yourself with them. [Read: Relationship timelines and the 15 phases of a healthy relationship]

#5 Meeting the parents. This means something different for everyone. It could mean meeting grandparents, siblings, kids, your mentor, their neighbor. Depending on how close you are to the folks, meeting the parents clues you into how future family functions will go.

Do your parents approve of your partner. Do you trust your parents’ judgment? Does your partner care what your parents think? Having a successful partner and parent introduction is reassuring and comforting.

#6 Taking a mini-vacation. Sure, you’ve spent the night at each other’s place but going away together even just for the weekend is different. You are on neutral turf. You aren’t tidying up in his space and he isn’t holding tongue about your sloppiness.

You get to see how you two manage more than 24 hours together, sharing a space, and even the process of traveling by plane or car can be stressful. Handling that together reminds you of what you can handle. [Read: All the reasons why traveling is one of the best tests of compatibility]

#7 A big disagreement. I am not talking about which Star Wars movie is the best *it’s the third one*. A real argument about something teaches you a lot. Do you get mad? Do you scream or say things you’ll regret?

Did you work through the fight & meet in the middle? Did you listen to each other or were you stubborn? Surviving your first fight is for sure a key moment in a relationship. It shows you that you can maturely handle imperfect moments.

#8 Little annoyances. For the first few months of dating, we usually wear rose-colored glasses. We see the best of our partners and overlook the little things that would normally drive us nuts. But there comes a time that those things are on display.

You notice your partner’s gross habits, weird quirks, and maybe even their faults, but what makes this a key moment in a relationship is that they aren’t enough for you to leave. You see the things about them that are imperfect or that drive you crazy but you still like them, maybe even because of those things rather than in spite of them. [Read: Starting a new relationship? The complete checklist to a new romance]

#9 Saying “I love you.” The first “I love you”s are always a big deal. I’m sure this doesn’t come as a surprise to you. Having said I love you and hearing it back pushes you from dating into a relationship and a serious relationship.

“I love you” means something especially when shared for the first time. It is a sign of vulnerability and trust. [Read: When and how should you say “I love you” for the first time – A full guide]

#11 Talking about the future. You may have shared your 5-year plan for your career on the second date, but if you are starting to talk about the future together, that says something. I don’t mean buying concert tickets for next month but seriously discussing what your future might look like.

Will you move in together? Would you move for the other person’s job? Are you both hoping for a big wedding or a simple ceremony at city hall or no wedding at all?

#12 Kids? Discussing kids is a huge dealbreaker for most relationships and that clearly makes it a key moment. Not being on the same page when it comes to wanting kids, having kids, or how you would potentially want to raise your kids can end even the best relationship.

So, having this discussion and honestly being on the same page can intensify your already strong connection or shatter it. Do you want kids? Do you want to stay home with the kids? Do you want one or four? [Read: How not to rush into a relationship and avoid an early crash & burn]

What if you can’t have kids biologically? Do you want to adopt? Will you raise them in the church or to choose their own religion or none when they are old enough? There are a lot of questions to be answered no matter what those answers are. And once this conversation has been had your relationship has hit a solid point to move forward.

[Read: 50 relationship questions that can test your relationship compatibility instantly]

Have you had these key moments in your relationship yet? Did these moments happen the way you thought they would? Did you work through unfortunate times and become closer? The key moments in a relationship define a lot, so being able to spot them is important.

The post 12 Key Moments in a Relationship that Predict Your Future Together is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Use Plausible Deniability to Get Her to Leave with You

Women often resist going home with you because they don’t want to appear slutty. To bypass this issue, all she needs is plausible deniability, which you can provide.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I want to discuss a phase that many men struggle with: the extraction phase. It’s a phase prone to resistance and also the time you get an indication of whether you have successfully built compliance and dealt with her resistance even though other factors like mood changes, wildcards, and logistical factors may pop up at the last minute.

Contents

I. What Is Plausible Deniability?

1. Why Do You Need It?
2. Planting the Seed

II. Recap

Therefore, I consider this phase important to master. You may get lucky, things may go smoothly, and she goes home with you without you delivering a tight game. But that is simply pure luck, and you cannot rely on this.

You must always try to go for the extraction, whether you feel the vibe is perfect or subprime. The number one reason men do not get laid consistently is that they do not make an invitation for it. They do not try to get the girl to leave with them; they do not try to extract.

Some guys may be too nervous about doing it, or it could be they want to protect their ego and not take the chance to ruin the connection. It feels so much better for your ego to leave a girl, falsely believing you could have banged her. But the truth is, if she did not leave with you, there is no “could have banged her.” You either bang her or you don’t. If you do not try to extract, you will never know.

So, always be extracting.

Even if the vibe is not right, and closing time is near, it is better to just go for it. You never know. Maybe she is an easy one; maybe she is not that into you. She might just decide that it is late and wants to have fun. You don’t know unless you try.

So, always be extracting.

In the past, I’ve discussed how to extract and get her to leave with you. I have also gone over how to go to a girl’s place (the system is very similar, just a few tweaks added).

Here’s the system:

• Reach a high note (generate compliance, reach a peak in emotions and compliance, and strike)

• Give a reason to leave (“It’s so loud in here.”)

• Find an excuse to go back to your place (“Do you like wine? Ah, good, let’s get back to my place and continue this conversation.”)

• Lower the pressure (“I don’t live far away.”)

• Persist (back off, build more compliance, handle potential resistance)

• Try again if you fail (persistence)

This template applies here as well and is probably the standard model most would agree with.

What we will discuss today is how to use plausible deniability to aid your extraction.

We’ve examined this subject before, but I want to give my take on it and add some key points.