Saturday 5 September 2020

Be on the Lookout for Duper’s Delight: Don’t Be Made a Fool

People lie, it’s a fact. However, some people take great pride in it. Be on the lookout for duper’s delight and know when a lie comes your way.

We live in a strange world where we must warn against the duper’s delight.

Of course, in an ideal world, everyone would tell the truth. We would understand the motives of another person easily, because lies simply wouldn’t be a thing. However, that isn’t the world we’re in, and lies are pretty commonplace.

Some lies aren’t so bad, such as a small lie to make someone feel better, for example. However, when your partner or a close friend is constantly sending big whopping lies your way, it’s really time to get to the bottom of why, perhaps, even cut them out of your life for good, if nothing changes.

Being able to tell when someone is lying can be difficult. You must read body language, know that person quite well, and understand another element too… duper’s delight.

[Read: The giveaways to tell if someone is lying to your face]

What is duper’s delight?

Duper’s delight is basically finding pleasure in the ability to lie to someone or manipulate them. Someone who is a master of deception, such as a narcissist, has a very bad case of duper’s delight much of the time. They take great pleasure in duping someone else, manipulating them, and tricking them in some way.

Of course, someone telling a lie once doesn’t mean they’re particularly manipulative or bad, because everyone lies occasionally. Now, if you notice duper’s delight and suspect them of telling more than one porky pie, you might have a duper in your midst.

A person who likes to deceive and manipulate others takes great pleasure in pulling it off. It’s almost like a rush of pride and sense of power that they believe they hold over that person as a result of the action they’ve taken. Pretty sad when you think about it.

[Read: How do narcissists control you so subtly? And why do you still allow them?]

Again, someone who lies once or twice doesn’t necessarily fall into this category. I’m talking about people who you regularly catch lying, or you suspect them to be lying. By understanding what duper’s delight is, and understanding the signs, you can obtain the concrete evidence to move forward.

How to spot duper’s delight

Being on the lookout for duper’s delight means looking very closely at the body language and behavior of the person you suspect to be lying. This is an inner joy they take in manipulating or deceiving someone, but it’s likely to be subtle.

They’re hardly likely to be jumping up and down about it. You might spot a subtle smile here and there, usually at a moment you wouldn’t expect it. This is a clear joy in what they’re doing. They just can’t hold in their delight.

[Read: The traits of toxic people that can hurt and emotionally damage you]

Look for the following:

– The corners of the mouth twitching or slightly upturned, because they just can’t control that smile from appearing. They’re so pleased with themselves!

– Biting their lip. Again, they’re desperately trying not to smile or laugh at their own success.

– Eyes squinting or creasing, as they try their best to keep a straight face.

– They are hyperactive, just can’t stand still, and always fidgeting.

The above signs are likely to occur when the mask slips a little. Remember, duper’s delight is overwhelming. It’s a sense of “I can’t believe I’m getting away with this.” In fact, they’re extremely proud of their duping ability. So, they’re likely to give away small signs, such as a quick and inappropriate smile, a laugh concealed by a cough, or something similar. These signs will normally only last for a split second or two, so you need to be on the lookout if you want to catch them.

A professional liar or manipulator is likely to be very clever with their words. They’ll be very persuasive too. You might find yourself falling foul of it a time or two before you start to wonder whether you really are being manipulated yourself. My advice is this, if you suspect it, start looking for signs of duper’s delight, and you won’t go far wrong.

[Read: Understanding how people use emotional manipulation]

How to turn the tide on a duper

Once you’ve spotted more than a couple of signs and pretty sure that this person has lied to you or tried to manipulate you on several occasions, it’s time to turn the tide. [Read: 13 giveaways to tell if someone is lying to your face]

First things first, you must be sure. I’ve said to once and I’ll say it again. People do lie occasionally but that doesn’t mean they’re trying to manipulate you or hurt you. Ask yourself honestly… have you lied lately? You probably have, because you’re human and that’s what we do sometimes. Sure, it’s not ideal, but as long as the lies you tell are designed to avoid someone being hurt and not to actually hurt them, there’s not usually a cause for concern. However, if someone in your life regularly twists the truth and manipulates you into doing or feeling something, sit up and take notice.

How do you turn the duper into a dummy?

You call them out, that’s how. You must be strong and make sure that they don’t turn up the heat on their duping. Everyone is at risk of being manipulated, but it’s not possible if you’re onto what they’re doing.

Raise an eyebrow and smile. You’re doing your own version of duper’s delight here! Say “oh really?” with as much sarcasm in your voice as you can muster. You have the power now; you know what’s really going on. When that is the case, the duper isn’t really duping anything. Your actions will get them wondering and worrying too. Have you figured them out?

Is this someone you really want in your life?

The bottom line? Do you really want someone in your life who finds joy in manipulating you? It obviously depends who they are in your life *family member, friend, or a partner*, but why do they feel the need to do this?

Surely if they wanted something from you, they could just ask. There is no need to lie and distort the truth in this way when you’re in a healthy relationship. Anyone who does that obviously simply finds great joy in using other people as toys.

You are not on this earth to be played around with. You are not a pawn in someone else’s game, and you don’t need your actions and thoughts twisted by someone else. If someone regularly treats you as a pawn, and finds joy in it, they’re simply not worth your time and attention.

[Read: How to manipulate a manipulator and escape their manipulative grasp]

The ultimate masters of manipulation

Duper’s delight is commonly associated with narcissists. These are masters of manipulation and people who find great joy in controlling other people to their own whims. If you’re in a relationship with this type of person, figure it out and gain the emotional strength to get out of the relationship.

There is no future with a narcissist, unless you want to be constantly twisted, turned, and manipulated for the rest of your days. You deserve a lot better than that, for sure.

[Read: How to recognize selfish people and stop them from hurting you]

Being able to spot duper’s delight takes the pleasure away from them and puts it firmly in your hands. Look out for an inability to hide their joy at the lie they’re telling you.

The post Be on the Lookout for Duper’s Delight: Don’t Be Made a Fool is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.



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