Every relationship experiences arguments occasionally. It’s not fun, but it’s normal. Turn a negative into a positive with some makeup sex!
When you’re in a relationship, arguments happen. If arguments aren’t happening at all, where is the passion? Of course, it’s not healthy to be arguing all the time, but an occasional shouting match can clear the air! Differences are inevitable when you’re in a relationship, and it’s healthy to get them out in the open. However, once the argument has settled, or even in the middle of it, you can boost the passion in the right way by having some steamy makeup sex!
Of course, that doesn’t mean you should let recurring problems fester and not be solved just so you can get down and dirty for a while.
But when the passion is high and tempers are flaring, sex can be the ideal way to get rid of frustration, calm things down, and help you remember what’s most important in your relationship – the two of you together. [Read: How to have rough sex and 15 ways to have the sexiest time]
Why are arguments normal in a relationship?
You might be wondering this because we’re told that arguments are bad. Of course, shouting at each other and misunderstanding one another is never a positive thing.
However, every single relationship out there is going to have problems occasionally. You can either let it go and always let your partner have their way *not a good thing, this leads to resentment*, or you can sort it out between the two of you.
Not everyone can have a calm conversation about a problem. If you’re someone who rarely gets flustered and can always remain calm, well done to you. You’re definitely in the minority! [Read: Relationship arguments – 23 do’s and don’ts to remember]
Arguments help to sort out problems, as long as you can set boundaries so your arguments don’t turn nasty.
Remember that at the end of the day, you love one another, and your love is more important than anger. However, a relationship without any arguments at all, ever, just isn’t normal. It lacks passion, it lacks care, and it’s just all a bit boring, don’t you think? [Read: Are relationship fights normal? 15 signs you’re fighting too much]
How many arguments are too many?
Too many arguments aren’t a good thing but if you’re experiencing the occasional tiff, it’s really nothing to worry about. It is impossible to put a number on how many arguments may signal a problem.
Every relationship is different, some couples may argue rarely but passionately, while others may argue more regularly and be able to put it to one side easily. [Read: Things to tell yourself when fighting with your lover]
Listen to your gut. If you feel like you’re always arguing about the same things, that’s a red flag. That means that you’re not actually resolving any problems, you’re just covering them up and hoping they’ll go away. [Read: 20 biggest sexual problems you can easily avoid in a relationship]
So, perhaps the best answer is to try and work out what you’re arguing about and look for patterns rather than trying to put a number on what’s normal versus what isn’t.
What is makeup sex?
Sex may be the last thing on your mind while arguing, but at times when both of you are clasping each other or standing really close in each other’s personal space, the angry surge and heavy panting may suddenly turn into a sexual rush. [Read: Ways to avoid the awkward tension after an argument]
Many couples have never experienced angry sex, but there are enough of them to vouch for angry sex and the incredible turn-on it gives.
If you’ve ever ended an argument abruptly by throwing each other into bed, chances are, you’ve had an enjoyable round of angry makeup sex. [Read: 30 sexy ways to spice up your sex life]
Why does makeup sex feel so passionate?
To your mind, pleasure, pain, fear, and almost every other intense feeling releases chemicals that make your heart race and make you feel breathless.
When you turn all that rage into sexual arousal, you’re redirecting the intense passion of the argument into lovemaking. This can end up making makeup sex feel a lot more passionate and animalistic than romantic lovemaking. [Read: Passionate sex – 23 secrets and ways to make sex lustful and steamy]
As passionate or confusing as makeup sex may be, avoid creating conflicts just to have makeup sex. While an unintentional romp in the middle of a fight may be a fun way to end the fight, it’s not going to be so much fun if it’s a repeated affair.
It could end up upsetting your partner, or worse, tearing the relationship apart because you need to live in a constant state of crisis to feel any passion between each other.
How to have makeup sex
Don’t initiate a fight just to make love. But if you find yourself feeling tingly down there in the middle of a fight, just keep these tips in mind to turn an argument into passionate makeup sex. [Read: Top 50 kinky things to try in a sexy relationship]
1. Get really close while arguing
You may be in a mad rage, but force your mind to get into each other’s personal space. Even the thought of getting close to your angry partner may annoy you at first, but a few weak moments of angry words could turn the argument into an arousing experience.
2. Hold your partner firmly *but don’t hurt them*
Is the fight getting out of control? Is your partner slapping your arm or pushing you away? This is probably a good time to hold your partner firmly and get even closer. And if you feel the surge of anger turn into arousal, you’re probably ready for angry sex.
But remember this, kiss your partner only if your partner partially reciprocates within a couple of tries. Sometimes, one of you may be too upset for makeup sex, especially if you’ve gone and slept with someone else! [Read: Sweaty sex – Animalistic reasons why it’s so dripping hot]
3. Your partner reciprocates
If your partner responds to your kiss by kissing back angrily, or even with passionate silence, don’t wait. Take your partner right there. Makeup sex is usually a quickie and not a romantic bonding bang.
4. Apologize
Apologies come easy when you’re passionately locked in a sexual embrace. It doesn’t matter if you’re in the wrong or right, apologize in the heat of the moment and your partner will soften up or apologize back to you.
When you indulge in passionate makeup sex, it’ll feel a lot easier to forgive each other or put things aside to talk about at a later, calmer time. And passionate apologies are more of a turn-on while having sex, just like dirty talking. [Read: How to talk dirty with your partner and turn them on]
5. Talk about your feelings calmly
When you and your partner have passionate sex after a fight, your defenses are down and so is your ego. You’ve apologized already. Now talk about your differences or about your deepest, happy feelings.
Have sex, don’t slow down, but don’t stop talking either. Say whatever you feel like to each other, and soon you’ll learn that sex makes truthful communication feel like a walk in the park.
6. Take out your anger
If you’re still angry with your partner, get angrier. Slap around, claw each other, and do whatever it takes to release the tension that’s built up inside of you. You’ll feel more aroused with each angry push, and feel better with each thrust.
However, it goes without saying that you should never go too far. Never intentionally hurt your partner, and if they tell you to stop, listen and do what they say. Makeup sex might be a bit angry, but it’s not designed to hurt or upset anyone. [Read: How to sound really sexy while having sex]
After the makeup sex…
Makeup sex can help both of you open up more and connect better on an emotional level. You’ll be more truthful and easily forgiving, which makes communicating with each other so much simpler and easy.
You don’t have to wait for a fight to test this. The next time you’re making love, talk about your feelings with each other. You’ll realize how much closer communicating in bed will bring the both of you.
Making up by making love shows that your relationship matters more than any petty argument to both of you. So it’s definitely a good thing as long as you know the right time to make love and the right time to avoid it. [Read: How to spice up a relationship – 30 ways to feel loved and horny]
Times when makeup sex is a good thing versus times when it’s not
When are the best times to have makeup sex? There are some times that are better than others. Let’s check out the good times and then the times it’s best to avoid it.
Times when makeup sex is great
1. You’re fighting over something that has no clear answer
2. When a petty difference blows out of proportion [Read: Immature things couples fight about all the time]
3. Bursts of jealousy and insecurity
4. Both of you are fighting with each other because of a series of little annoyances that built up over the day [Read: Breakup sex – What it is and how to know when you should have it]
Times when makeup sex probably won’t end well
1. You’ve cheated [Confession: I cheated on my boyfriend and feel so much better!]
2. Your relationship is falling apart
3. You’re disrespecting your partner or playing the argument with amusement
4. You create conflicts just to have angry makeup sex
[Read: Tips to be a happy couple that’s envied by all other couples]
If you’re one of the lucky couples who enjoy a good round of makeup sex to conclude an argument, good for you. For those of you who haven’t had angry makeup sex, try it. You’ll see how good it can be for your relationship.
The post Make Up Sex: How to Feel Hornier, Naughtier & Closer After a Fight in Love is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.
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