The 11 Powerful Signs of an Alcoholic that Reveal a Real Problem

Having a drink or two isn’t bad, but are they having a problem putting the bottle down? When does alcohol start to reveal the signs of an alcoholic?

Remember, you put yourself first when it comes to being in a relationship. No, you don’t need to dump a partner who drinks too much but look at their drinking habits. Do you see the early signs of an alcoholic?

If you notice the signs, it’s important to talk to them about it and encourage them to seek counseling. Because we all know no one drinks a bottle a night for fun. [Read: The guide to decide if you should leave someone you love]

The clearest signs that they’re an alcoholic

When you’re dating, you look for someone who matches you. Someone who enjoys your sense of humor and vice versa. A partner who’s loyal and makes you feel like you’re on cloud nine. There may be people you meet that appear to be perfect, but let’s get real, everyone has their secrets.

Alcoholism is a very real and progressive disease that not only affects the person who’s excessively drinking but also affects everyone around them. Now, I’m not saying the person you’re dating is an alcoholic, nor am I saying if they are, you should leave them. But, knowing the signs of an alcoholic will help you determine the next steps you need to take. Learn these red flags of an alcoholic.

#1 They drink when stressed. Everyone gets stressed out, but what matters is how you relieve that stress. When stressed, some people play video games, some go for a run, and others eat. However, your partner picks up a bottle of alcohol instead.

If they’re using alcohol to cope with situations in their life, it’s clear that they’re using it as a crutch. Choosing alcohol for emotional relief is an early sign of alcoholism. [Read: Why you should run if you see these red flags in a relationship]

#2 Their social life is all about the booze. They love to go out and party, however, will only do so if there’s alcohol available for them. If not, they complain about how they can’t enjoy partying when sober. If they can’t last more than two minutes without a drink in their hand, well, it’s clear that something is severely wrong. [Read: Lifestyle changes to make for a better life]

#3 They have a family history. Now, you probably won’t find this out right away, but if they tell you they have a family of alcoholism and you notice that they drink heavily, it’s likely that this is one of the clear early signs of an alcoholic. But, with that being said, a family history doesn’t mean that they are alcoholics as well. So, you need to see other signs in order to conclude this one.

#4 They become a different person when drinking. Naturally, alcohol brings out different parts of our personality. People can become sleepy or extremely happy. However, with alcoholics, they usually become aggressive, emotional, verbally abusive, and mean.

But usually, if you’re an alcoholic, you’re not a happy one. If they go from positive to negative after a couple of drinks, it’s time to see this as an early stage of alcoholism.

#5 They drink more than expected. They may have only wanted one drink or brings home a bottle of wine even though she wanted a break. The point is, they have no control over their consumption of alcohol. It’s almost like they’re not in control of themselves, rather, the alcohol controls when and where they’re going to drink.

#6 They can handle their liquor. There are people who are unable to hold their alcohol while there are people who are able to handle their alcohol. When I mean “handle.” I mean six or seven drinks are nothing for them. In fact, you can’t even tell that they’ve been drinking.

Now, though this may seem impressive, this also shows that they’ve developed a high tolerance for alcohol. And what does this mean? They drank their way to this tolerance. 

#7 They drink anything. Most people have a favorite drink. But for an alcoholic, they’re not picky. They drink anything that lands in front of them, regardless of the brand. Sometimes, they may not have the money to afford their drink of choice but that doesn’t stop them. Whatever the cheapest drink is, they’ll buy it. It’s not about quality, it’s about numbing their emotions. [Read: How to get out of a toxic relationship with your dignity intact]

#8 They need a drink. If not, they’re immediately cranky and irritable. But when they have a drink in their hand, they’re at their best and usually the life of the party. However, leave them for a period of time without a drink and you’ll notice their mood completely change. If anything, they’re the worst person when they’re sober.

#9 Alcohol has put them in trouble. They drank too much last night so they called in sick this morning or when they drove home drunk and were caught by police a couple weeks ago.

See, their drinking isn’t just about them having a drink every now and then. Their drinking habits have gotten them in severe trouble in their personal life whether it’s with work or the law.

#10 Alcohol is a priority. People find the money for things that they really need. For them, they need alcohol. They may need money for their car insurance or rent, but the first thing they’re going to invest in will be in a bottle of alcohol. See, they have a priority and regardless of what’s happening in their life, they’ll make sure that they always have money for a bottle. [Read: 12 signs it’s time to jump ship and leave your partner]

#11 They drink alone. It’s harder to point out an alcoholic when they’re drinking with other people, but if they drink alone frequently then you need to acknowledge this as an early stage of alcoholism. Who drinks alone, honestly? No one does that for fun. Instead, they have some dark demons they’re battling.

[Read: How to help your partner beat their unhealthy habit]

If someone is an alcoholic it doesn’t make them a bad person, but you know that this unhealthy behavior isn’t something you need to get pulled into. Now that you know the signs of an alcoholic, is your partner or someone you love getting addicted to it?

The post The 11 Powerful Signs of an Alcoholic that Reveal a Real Problem is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Should You Try Online Dating? The Guide to Decide if It’s for You

Online dating seems to be the thing to do if you are single in this age and time. But, it is not for everyone. Should you try online dating?

Should you try online dating? Online dating seems pretty straightforward, doesn’t it? Well, it is anything but. Considering whether or not to try online dating is not as simple as trying a new restaurant.

Online dating comes with a lot of rejection. It comes with insecurity. It comes with baggage and trust issues. And it is not right for everyone.

Should you try online dating?

A few years ago, I asked myself this very question. Should you try online dating? I wasn’t the only one either. All my friends and family asked me too. [Read: 13 reasons why online dating isn’t for everyone]

Being single for a while makes you think that online dating is the next logical step. If you are of a certain age and are not in a relationship but would like to be, online dating makes sense, right?

Well, not necessarily. It seems as easy as creating a social media account. You share some info about yourself and post your favorite photos and maybe a joke or two. It sounds simple enough.

But, what comes after you sign up is the hard part. Matching with someone and never hearing from them. Messaging someone and not getting a response. Connecting with someone only for them to ghost you. Trying to make plans when you have anxiety. Not cancelling plans once you’ve made them. And it goes on. [Read: 13 reasons why online dating isn’t for everyone]

Sometimes you have to see for yourself, but maybe I can protect you from that.

I tried online dating on and off for years. At first, it seems okay. You chat with someone. Then you text them and maybe even FaceTime. But for me, I had trouble shutting down the nerves. There is a build-up of expectations when you meet someone you have only talked to online. And being a model overthinker, I couldn’t shake the nerves. [Read: The 15 things you can do to have a great first date]

Skip ahead a few years and I was managing my nerves better. I even went on a few dates. But, still, I found that my trust issues from past relationships carried over so intensely. The lack of proof you get from meeting someone online led me to the worst possible assumptions.

Then meeting someone that turned out to have a whole family he lied to me about was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Sure, there is never a sure thing in dating, but when you meet someone at work or through friends, there is at least some level of honesty and accountability when you have a mutual connection. I realized after a few failed dates that I needed that reassurance. But, do you? [Read: How NOT to date online – What every online dater must know]

Should you try online dating?

Online dating is perfect for some people. They can meet a lot of people without too much investment. There is little risk because if it doesn’t work out you’ll never see them again. You get a clean slate and can have fun.

But, if you have remaining baggage, trust issues, or anxiety, some aspects of online dating may not be for you. So, before signing up for the latest app, ask yourself these questions.

#1 Do you have trust issues? If your answer is no, I am jealous. But, online dating is a petridish of liars. I do not want to sour your hopefulness, but it is a fact. People lie about what they want, who they are, their relationship status, and more.

If you trust yourself and are not going to be affected by facing someone who is lying to you, online dating could be right for you. [Read: How to instantly spot liars in an online dating site]

#2 Do you know what you want? Online dating can be a great place for you to test the waters. You can go on a lot of dates and figure out what you want. But, if you are dead set on what you want and are unwilling to waver on that, online dating will likely become a headache.

No one is going to fit your mold, so you have to know what you want, but be open for it to work.

#3 Are you an overthinker? Should you try online dating as an overthinker? Yes and no. Yes, if you want to try to do better. If you want to try to get used to things and let them be without worrying, this could be a good place to start.

But, if you are an overthinker who has no plans to change, online dating will drive you bonkers. It can corrupt your life and take over if you let it. [Read: 15 reasons why you’re an overthinker who can’t make up their mind]

#4 Can you shut down expectations? This is something I always had trouble with. Whether you chat with someone for a few hours or weeks before meeting, your mind builds up a picture of them. If you dwell too much on that you will be disappointed.

If you can’t shut down your mind from jumping to conclusions, each date will be intense.

#5 Do you have thick skin? I am not talking about someone turning you down, but turning others down. It will happen. You won’t like everyone that messages you. Whether you tell them or ghost people can be cruel. They can name call or worse.

If you can’t handle the variety of weirdos out there, online dating, no matter how, will be too much for you.

#6 Can you handle rejection? Rejection is a part of dating, especially online dating. You can chat with someone for two minutes and be rejected. If you struggle with self-esteem and being rejected regularly will weigh on your mental health, skip online dating. [Read: How to handle rejection without making a fool out of yourself]

#7 Are you decisive? Online dating provides you with more options than most other types of dating. You are given the opportunity to meet so many people. But, you need to know where to draw the line. Know what your standards and dealbreakers are.

You also should be able to let someone know what your intentions are or if you are unsure. Making decisions is a big part of online dating and if you’re no good at that, you may want to hire a matchmaker.

#8 Are you picky? I am. I am the queen of being picky. I have high standards and ask a lot from someone I’m dating. So when I was online dating I online swiped right *liked* maybe three out of every fifty people I passed.

Not only was I being shallow, but I was doing myself a disservice. I was shutting myself off from some potentially great people because they had weird taste in something, had a picture with a girl in it, or other random things. Being picky is no good when it comes to whether you should try online dating.

You need a balance between decisiveness and pickiness. 

#9 Are you okay with shallowness?  There is no escape from being shallow when it comes to online dating. You see a photo of someone and immediately decide if you are attracted to them or not. It is part of it whether you like it or not.

You cannot hide from that when online dating. And you need to show yourself and be okay with people basing their interest in you on that and vice versa.

#10 Have you tried everything else? Online dating does not need to be a last resort, signing up for The Bachelor should be. But, if you are hesitant about online dating, try other outlets first. Go to mixers or networking events.

Ask your friends to set you up. Take classes. Actually, try other methods of dating before saying you have tried it all. [Read: 16 exciting ways to help you meet new people]

#11 Do you actually want to date? Here is the big one. Being single is totally okay. You do not need to be actively dating or in a relationship to matter. You are worth a lot all on your own. If you like being single why bother going through the hurdles of dating?

Do not let friends or family push you into it. If you don’t want to date, don’t online date to prove something to anyone else or because you feel like you should.

[Read: How to stay single until you’re seriously ready to mingle]

Should you try online dating? Hopefully, you can answer that question for yourself now.

The post Should You Try Online Dating? The Guide to Decide if It’s for You is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Help a Guy through a Breakup & Be the Good Friend He Needs

Watching anyone go through a breakup isn’t easy. As a friend, it can be hard to know how to help a guy through a breakup. But, there’s always a way.

Whether it’s your brother, best guy friend, or neighbor—it’s not easy knowing what to do or how to help a guy through a breakup. Usually, men keep their emotions to themselves and you assume they’re fine. But no one is ever fine.

Going through a breakup isn’t an easy experience. And let’s face it, unless you really wanted to end things with this person—usually, you’re upset and hurt. Which makes complete sense. You’re grieving the loss of your partner. No, they didn’t die, but they’re gone from your life. So, you know exactly how it feels when a guy you know is going through a breakup.

How to help a guy through a breakup

When my brother went through a breakup, I didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t crying or posting sad songs on Facebook. He was basically acting the same, just slightly cranky. So what do you do? [Read: How to know the qualities of a good friend and what sets them apart from the rest]

Knowing how to support a man who’s going through a breakup isn’t easy. But that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. You just need to know what to do, it’s as simple as that. So, if you know someone close to you who’s going through a breakup, it’s time you learn what’s the best way to give them the support they need.

Even though they may say they’re fine, deep down, everyone needs to have a support system around them. He’s going to need a helping hand, so I’m here to help you learn how to help a guy through a breakup.

#1 Give them some space. Some men won’t even tell you they’re going through a breakup until weeks later. Not because they don’t want to tell you, but they’re going through their own process.

Before bombarding them with new women and long nights out at the club, tell them you’re there for them and give them some space. No, don’t completely ignore them, but give them some space to breathe. [Read: 22 ways you can help your friend who is sad]

#2 Encourage them to talk. After giving them a little bit of space, encourage them to talk to you. But, only if they want to. Even though I know you want them to give you the juicy details, if they’re closed to the idea of opening up right now, then they’re not ready. And that’s perfectly okay. Respect this. They’ll come to you when they’re ready and if desired.

#3 Actively listen. If they decide to talk about it, this isn’t an opening to now tell them all of your problems. Save that conversation for another day. Now, it’s time for you to be a listener. Put your phone down, and actively listen to them talk. When you say something, be compassionate and empathetic. This isn’t the time for you to start judging them. [Read: How to be a better listener in your relationships]

#4 Be the voice of reason. When they talk, you’re going to see them go through many emotions. They’ll be sad, angry, bitter. It’s easy to let them trash talk about the relationship, but be the voice of reason. If they want to slash their ex’s tires, you cannot be the one to encourage bad behavior. You need to make sure they don’t do anything stupid.

#5 Remember, you’re not a therapist. When they’re telling you things, you’re going to be supportive. But remember you’re not a therapist. If they’ve started drinking or doing drugs, you need to point them to professional help. Sure, you can be supportive during this period of time, but if you want to know how to help a guy through a breakup but he’s not mentally doing well, he needs to see a doctor. 

#6 There are limits. During this time, he’s going to need a lot of support. But there should be boundaries. Hanging out with him is good, but if he’s waking you up in the middle of the night to grab some beers, you’re probably not going to be down for that. And that’s okay. You have limits and you’re not a bad friend for it. You’re human, not a machine. 

#7 Offer to go out. Many people revert when going through a breakup. They stay at home and grieve. Now, he needs this time too, but at some point, he’ll need to leave the house. Offer to go out hiking, dinner, to the movies, or a night out. You shouldn’t force them to go out, but keep offering. They’ll eventually say yes.

#8 If he asks for your opinion, tell him. At some point, he’s going to ask you for your opinion on the breakup. This is the moment where he wants to reflect. If he asks you what you think, then you should be honest with him. There’s never one side to a story. Now, you shouldn’t be rude and start telling him he’s messed up and ruined his life. But by telling him evident issues, he’ll process the breakup properly. [Read: Being brutally honest – 13 scenarios when it’s an obligation]

#9 Encourage self-care. Though everyone grieves differently, self-care is essential. They need to find their own path when it comes to handling the breakup. However they decided to carry through their self-care, you need to support and encourage it. Of course, if he’s drinking or drugs, that’s completely different.

#10 Healing takes time. He will most likely just want to move on and get over the breakup. But you need to tell him grieving takes time. This isn’t going to be better tomorrow or even a week from now. It’ll take time to process everything that happened. Healing isn’t going to happen as quickly as you want it to. He needs to know he can’t rush the process.

#11 Everyone grieves differently. When it comes to breakups, not everyone buys a bucket of ice cream and watches The Notebook. If you’ve experienced a breakup, you grieved in a certain way. But that way isn’t necessarily going to work for them. This isn’t the time for you to lecture them that they’re grieving in the wrong way. Let them do what feels right. [Read: How to make the world a better place by what you say]

#12 Be thoughtful. If you know where he works, drop by with lunch for him one day. Or if he comes over, cook him his favorite meal. It doesn’t have to be grandiose acts of kindness. You don’t need to put his name on a billboard. But the small acts let him know that he’s loved and supported through the bad times.

[Read: How to cheer someone up – 18 ways to help them feel awesome again]

Now that you know how to help a guy through a breakup, you’ll be able to provide the right type of support. And he’ll really appreciate it.

The post How to Help a Guy through a Breakup & Be the Good Friend He Needs is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

16 Casual First Date Ideas that are Perfect for a Dreamy Fun Date

First dates are often loaded with anxiety and awkwardness. To make it a success, here are all the casual first date ideas to ensure you both have fun.

Just thinking about a first date can make you nervous. The pressure of the location, your outfit, your personality, it all piles up. Instead of putting all the attention on your nerves, try out these casual first date ideas that will ensure you both have fun.

Even in the most casual of circumstances, first dates are rarely easy. Of course, you can always go for drinks or coffee, but that leaves you open to awkward silences, word vomit, and if you drink too much, actual vomit.

Think of your own casual first date ideas

You are probably thinking, DUH. That is why you came here in the first place to get ideas. And don’t worry, I have some. But, before I recommend this date or that date, think of what you want to do. What do you like doing? Is there something you can teach your date? Is there something that always breaks the ice for you?

Is there a sport you love or a favorite park you love to walk through? Think about what you would enjoy doing before considering outside ideas. When you look at it that way, you may come up with something perfect. [Read: 20 fun and unconventional date ideas that’ll impress your date]

If you are already doing something you love to do, your date will feed off of that energy. If you are doing something you are comfortable doing, your nerves will calm. If you can teach your date something new, you are breaking the ice and showing off all at once.

If you create a casual first date idea based on your specific preferences, you are already halfway there.

Casual first date ideas

If finding something you’re interested in isn’t working or you don’t think your date is up for dirt biking or rock climbing, here are some more casual first date ideas to consider.

#1 Go for a walk. This may seem super boring, but it gives you a chance to talk without awkwardness. When you go for a walk, there is always something to pull your attention or to talk about. You do not have to dive into your past to have a decent conversation.

You can talk about nature, animals, and just enjoy the day. Being outside also offers tranquility and calmness to a first date that cannot be replicated anywhere else. [Read: How to plan a date to knock the socks off anyone]

#2 Go to an animal shelter. If you are both animal lovers *who isn’t* heading to an animal shelter can be a wonderful first date. Cuddle with puppies and kittens. Spend time with these animals that crave love and affection.

Seeing how someone treats animals is also a good sign as to how they treat people.

#3 Go on a factory tour. There is a reason factory tours are popular field trip destinations for kids. They are both fun and educational. You can search online to find a factory tour near you. They are often free or have very low entry fees.

You can find breweries, button factories, chocolate factories, there is something for everyone. [Read: How long should a first date last? Your guide to timing it right]

#4 Take a class. Learning something new together is a great way to get to know each other. You can find chemistry and just see if you work well together. You can go for a cooking class, an art class, or really test trust with a dance class.

#5 Go to an amusement park or arcade. Become a kid again. Feed off of the adrenaline. This gives you ample time to chat while waiting in line and massive amounts of fun when riding a roller coaster. If rides aren’t your thing, try an arcade.

You can have a little friendly competition playing air hockey. Win your date a cheaply made teddy bear in a claw machine and try not to embarrass yourself with that infamously hard basketball game. [Read: First date moves that will guarantee a second]

#6 Check out a museum. At first thought, museums may sound boring. They can be. But there are tons of different museums to visit. History, art, science, even the botanical gardens are exciting.

This is essentially like going for a walk but with lots of conversation starters.

#7 Try out bowling or mini-golf. Competition is a great way to break the ice and test your boundaries together. Bowling and mini golf are both relatively easy and low energy games. You can poke fun at your date’s lack of aim or show off your wicked skills. [Read: 18 things you HAVE to avoid doing on your first date]

#8 Solve a problem. I do not mean unclogging your bathroom sink. I mean head to an escape room. You will be matched up with one or two other couples and have to solve clues and riddles to get out.

This is not only an ideal way to live out your Da Vinci Code fantasy, but it also gives you a great way to hang out without relying on your ability to think of conversation topics.

#9 Teach them something. Are you a killer ice skater? Are you amazing at baseball? Introduce your date to something new and teach them something you are awesome at. Take them to the batting cages or help them balance on skates.

This shows off your talents without seeming too showy, but also allows your date to see how patient you are. [Read: Fun first date ideas to leave them wanting more]

#10 Let them teach you something. If you aren’t the best teacher, let your date teach you something they are great at. Let them take you to a skate park and teach you a simple trick.

This will show your ability to let go of control and show you how patient and comforting they can be.

#11 Go to the mall. Unsure of what sort of casual first date is right for you? Head to the mall. This will take you back to those good old middle school dates. You can get a smoothie, snag some free samples from the food court, and do some window shopping.

Have a laugh in Spencers, check out the latest technology at Brookstone, and split a soft pretzel.

#12 Try karaoke. Whether you have a great singing voice or not, karaoke is an amazing first date idea. You are not forced to talk too much, but you do get to see if you are comfortable around this person.

Singing is a very vulnerable thing and singing with or in front of someone new shows your chemistry as well as your taste in music.

#13 Laugh. Lighten up and let go of those first date jitters. If you’re looking for casual first date ideas that are fun and a good laugh, head to a local comedy club and crack up. Again, this means you do not need to find a bunch of great topics to chat about. You can laugh together and get an idea of each other’s senses of humor and then react later on in the night. [Read: 15 first date rules everyone should follow for a memorable night]

#14 Volunteer. Be a good Samaritan and have a great first date. Helping the less fortunate not only makes you feel great but also lets you and your date bond. Head to a soup kitchen, go toy shopping and donate to a shelter, or visit the elderly.

These things are needed in all communities, and this a great way to enjoy it even more.

#15 Go to a game. Sports are not for everyone, but going to a national game or a local one can be loads of fun. Enjoy a hot dog, beer, and cheer on your favorite team.

This is a fun and low-key date that gives you a buffer but also gives you time to talk. [Read: How to perfect your first date conversation]

#16 See a psychic. This is definitely something that is personal to many people, but it can also be loads of fun. I do not recommend doling out hundreds on a medium during a first date. Instead, get your palms read at a local shop for about $20.

It may not offer loads of insight into your future, but it can be anywhere from weird to hilarious. It is definitely something unique to do with a first date.

[Read: Signs that point to a great first date]

I hope at least a few of these casual first date ideas caught your eye and will make their way into your next first date itinerary.

The post 16 Casual First Date Ideas that are Perfect for a Dreamy Fun Date is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

16 Subtle Signs He Wants to Make a Move on You and Ask You Out

You’re not sure what’s going on between you two. Everything you need is right in front of you. Time to pay attention to the signs he wants to make a move.

When it comes to guys, they can be a wee bit confusing. But let’s be honest with ourselves—they’re not that complicated. Rather, we make the situation dramatic and complicated. In reality, we’re not paying attention to the real signs he wants to make a move.

You know, the signs that will give you the answer. And that’s partly because most of the time, we don’t want to know the actual answer. Why? Because what if it’s not the answer we were looking for?

But isn’t it better to know where you stand with a guy, so you stop wasting your time? The answer is yes. Even though I know you’re cringing a bit; you deserve the truth. [Read: How to get your crush to like you back]

How to tell the signs he wants to make a move

If you’ve been banging your head against the wall trying to figure out what’s going on with him, you can give your head a rest. If a guy wants to make a move, he’ll let you know, trust me. He may not tell it to your face, but you’ll be able to figure out by his actions whether he’s interested in you or not.

Once you figure out if he wants to make a move, you decide the next step. Knowing the truth puts the power in your hands, and now you have the time to decide if this is something you want or not. So, let’s get started and show you the 16 signs he wants to make a move.

Be two steps ahead.

#1 You’re feeling the vibes. You have this thing called intuition, listen to it. If you feel there’s some sexual tension between you, there probably is. Now, it doesn’t mean he’s going to make a move, but it does show that he wants you. And, as we all know, that’s a pretty good first step. If you’re feeling the vibes, listen to them. [Read: These signs of chemistry reveal an instant connection]

#2 His body language. When it comes to signs, there’s nothing more obvious than body language. Our body language speaks the words we’re too scared to say out loud. If he wants to make the first move, he’s going to let you know he wants you subconsciously. Whether it’s through hugging, touching, or even eye contact.

#3 He can’t look you in the eyes. He wants to look at you in the eyes, but when he does, he quickly looks away. Now, if you never speak and he’s doing this, then he’s not interested. If you have a good relationship, but he’s nervous to look at you, then he’s trying to calm himself around you. [Read: How to read people and understand what they’re thinking instantly]

#4 He’s nervous. What other reason is there to be nervous other than concealing his feelings for you. If he’s nervous around you, stuttering, sweating, those are signs he’s into you. More so, those are signs he wants to make a move but is terrified of doing it. If you want to take the relationship to the next level, then why don’t you make the first move? [Read: How to ask a guy on a date – The walkthrough all girls need to know]

#5 He’s always there. When you need him, he’s there. There’s no question about it. A man who doesn’t care about you is unreliable; you’ll never be able to depend on him. But he’s someone you can depend on. He wants you to see that he’s a good partner for you.

#6 His friends tease him. When you hang out together, his friends are all over it. They love taking the opportunity to tease him around you. They know he likes you, but he’s scared to make a move. As friends, teasing him is their way of pushing him to make a move.

#7 He’s hyper around you. When you hang out, it’s like he has a sudden burst of energy. And that’s because he’s into you. He can’t even control his excitement. When you spend time together, he’s full of fun ideas and plans. Maybe one of those plans will end with a kiss… who knows. [Read: How to get a guy to kiss you when you want him to]

#8 He’s chatty online. In person, he’s a nervous wreck, but when you talk online, he’s very chatty. The true him comes out when he feels comfortable. He sends you hilarious memes, songs, and can have deep conversations with you. He’s just a little nervous in person to relax and be himself. 

#9 His face shines bright when he sees you. When he turns the corner and sees you, his face goes from flat to a full smile. What can I say? The guy likes you. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t even spend the time to look at you. You make him smile, and all he’s thinking is how he can take the relationship to the next step. [Read: How to tell if you crush likes you with these subtle cues]

#10 He tries to please you. When you’re feeling down, he’ll go out of his way to buy you ice cream or tell you a funny joke to see you laugh. He wants to make you happy, and he goes out of his way to do it. That’s the sign of a man who wants something more than just friendship.

#11 He pays attention to you. When you’re talking to him, he listens. But really he listens. He’s not on his phone, saying “yeah, yeah,” whenever you ask him a question. Instead, he’s engaged and interested in what you have to say. That’s because he likes you.

#12 He flirts with you. Now, this is a big one. Some guys are nervous to flirt with the girl they like, but eventually, it’ll happen. Flirting is the next step, and he wants you to see that he’s into you. If you flirt with each other, he wants to make a move. [Read: How guys flirt – 15 subtle things guys do when they like a girl]

#13 He talks about you with other people. Word around the street is that he talks about you with other people. Of course, he only talks about the good things, and that’s because he’s into you. He can’t even keep his feelings to himself; he needs to share it with anyone who will listen.

#14 He makes jokes about the future. No one is going to talk about the future unless they want a future with that person. If he’s cracking jokes about being your boyfriend or doing things in the future, don’t take it lightly. Those jokes mean something to him on some level. Now, it doesn’t mean he’s going to ask for your hand in marriage, but he is into you. [Read: 30 subtle, obvious and really sexy flirting tips all women should know]

#15 He tries to impress you. When you’re around, he talks himself up. He wants you to see that he’s a real man; a man you can depend on.

[Read: The signs he likes you but is afraid of rejection]

If you want to know what’s going on in his head, read the signs he wants to make a move. Though you can’t read his mind, you’ll be able to figure out your next step.

The post 16 Subtle Signs He Wants to Make a Move on You and Ask You Out is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Seduce an Older Man

There is the old saying that “age is just a number.” But when you find that you are into older men, how do you navigate the situation? Are you an old soul? Do you sometimes feel like you are bored around your peers or that you do not have much in common with them? You […]

The post How to Seduce an Older Man appeared first on Luvze.

Is He Leading You On? 16 Definitive Signs He’s Playing You for Fun

As someone who has been led on by guys and has even led on a few guys in her time, I am uniquely qualified to answer the question, is he leading you on?

The thing about being led on is that when it’s happening you have no clue. You’re hopeful and excited, never even considering the question: is he leading you on?

If you’ve ever been led on before, you know that the end result is anything but hopeful or exciting. In fact, it feels like you’ve been royally screwed over. And that’s because you have.

When someone leads you on, they are not treating you with respect. They play games with your emotions with little to no sympathy for the pain they cause you.

This is why it is important to be able to spot the signs that he is leading you. Is he leading you on or is he genuine in his intentions? Put a stop to it before you get hurt. [Read: How to play the player and return the favor like a boss]

What does being led on really mean?

Before we get into the signs he’s leading you on, let’s make sure you really know what being led on means. It isn’t always black and white and can be confusing. So, I’m going to lay it out there for you.

When someone leads you on, it means they are giving you false hope. Some consider flirting with someone that buys you a drink a form of leading someone on. In my book that is a little too petite to be considered leading on.

In my book, being led on is when someone gives you hope, indirectly or directly, that they are interested in you when they know they do not plan on following through.

[Read: 11 obvious signs that he’s just using you]

You can be led on and then ghosted. You can be led on and then stood up. Or you can be led on and then dumped or used and always let down.

I’ll give you an example of being led on from my own personal collection of experiences. I was talking to a new guy for about two weeks. Early on I asked him flat out what he was looking for. He told me he wanted to take things slowly but was ultimately looking for a relationship.

After that, he continued to push that point home by telling me what we would do on future dates, how he was nervous I wouldn’t like him once we met, and how happy he was he met me.

I being the person I am was skeptical, of course, and as it turns out, rightfully so. Out of the blue one day, he texted me that he was sorry but had no desire for anything serious. He led me on for weeks. He didn’t give a reason or make an excuse.

Now, I appreciated the honesty. It was certainly better than all out ghosting, but that is what leading on is.

Sure, he could have his own reasons like he met someone he liked more, lost interest, was scared of our connection, blah blah blah. But, in my book 9/10 times when someone leads you on they planned on dropping you from the start.

Sure sometimes they want something out of you like sex or companionship. Other times they just do it to do it. But no matter the reason, it sucks. You deserve to know when it’s going to happen. [Read: 10 signs he’s not playing hard to get he’s just playing you]

Is he leading you on?

Why do you think he’s leading you on? What led you to this article?

Whatever it is, I can confidently say that there is about a 90% chance your gut feeling is spot on. If something feels off and you’re questioning his intentions, you probably should be.

Now, I hate to be a Debbie Downer, but those are the odds. Sure, sometimes we overthink and have trust issues, but if you feel like he is leading you on, he probably is.

Is he leading you on? Well, trust your gut, ladies and gents. And if you still want to be sure you can feel good about dumping his ass, read on.

Signs he’s leading you on

If he shows these signs he is leading you on. Are there excuses that could be made and arguments that could prove me wrong? Sure. Why waste your time when you deserve better?

Here are the signs he’s leading you on.

#1 He said he wasn’t looking for anything serious. This is something a lot of us tend to ignore. Some guys straight up tell us that they are leading us on. We either ignore it or deny it.

When a guy says this but then starts treating you like he wants a relationship we assume he changed his mind. But you cannot assume. No matter his actions, if he said he didn’t want something serious then treats you like he does, he is leading you on openly. [Read: Why do guys ghost? 15 common reasons why they turn into cowards]

#2 He’s newly single. Not every newly single guy is a player, but there is a good chance a guy who is fresh out of a relationship isn’t looking to settle down. Even if he claims to be over his ex and didn’t plan on leading you on, it will likely turn out that way. Stay alert.

#3 He doesn’t keep in touch. A guy who is leading you on only gives you the perfect amount of attention so that you seek him out. He wants you to think he is interested just enough so that he doesn’t have to make the effort. [Read: 10 reasons a guy could be ignoring you]

#4 He’s too charming. Anytime you feel like he is too charming or suave or smooth, he probably is. When a guy is truly interested he gets nervous, yes even the most confident ones too. If everything he says is so perfect, it is not because he’s perfect. It is because he is great at playing you to get what he wants.

#5 He likes you too much too fast. I’m not saying you don’t deserve someone that likes you, but when someone likes you loads without even knowing you, it is weird. Guys seem to think this is the best way to grab your interest.

And we do tend to fall for it. Instead, question what this guy really knows about you. Does he really like you? Does he really want you to like him?

#6 He doesn’t live up to his word. Words only go so far. If he makes plans and cancels them or says he’ll call you later and doesn’t, he isn’t as invested as he claims to be.

#7 He’s confusing. If you’re talking to a guy who makes you question everything he is probably leading you on. He wants to find a balance of keeping you interested and keeping his distance so he doesn’t have to take accountability for hurting you later on.

If he’s making you feel crazy its because he’s trying to. [Read: Blowing hot and cold? 3 stages to explain why he’s doing that]

#8 His story changes. Did he first tell you he was free every Thursday but when Thursday rolls around he has plans? Did he tell you he would text you at 8 but when 8 o’clock strikes he doesn’t reach out and doesn’t respond to you?

If he can’t keep his story straight, it’s because he is lying and probably to more than one person.

#9 It is a struggle to make plans. A guy who is leading you on will be a nightmare to make plans with because he is waiting for something he considers to be better to come along and wants to string you along as a backup.

#10 You’re always waiting for him. Are you always waiting for him to text you? Are you waiting for him to be over his ex or to have time for a relationship? If he is keeping you waiting, not only does he not consider your time as valuable, but he doesn’t consider you as valuable either.

#11 He always turns the conversation to sex. A lot of guys that lead you on are looking for one thing. Sex. And if that’s what you want, great. If not, and he knows that, he will string you along until he gets what he wants.

If you just send him a cute selfie or outfit photo and he turns everything into something sexual, he is most definitely leading you on and getting impatient while doing it. [Read: The signs he just wants sex and is using you for his enjoyment]

#12 He doesn’t go anywhere with you. A guy who is leading you on puts in the exact amount of effort he needs for you to remain interested. He will say the right things, but will not do anything he doesn’t want to.

That means he likely won’t take you dancing, out for dinner, or even drinks. He’ll stay local.

#13 He uses the same lines. If he repeated himself a lot, there is a good chance he is leading you on. Maybe he uses pet names too early or repeats something he knows you responded well to before.

This is not because he is sweet or a good listener. He is lazy and doing the absolute least to impress you.

#14 He says “he is not like other guys.” If a guy says this, you should run away ASAP. He is most definitely leading you on.

#15 He overreacts to your worries. If you’re a mature person and share your concerns with him and he gets defensive or guilts you for questioning him, he is leading you on. And he is good at it. [Read: The 12 clues your guy is just using you]

#16 You just get a vibe. Sometimes you just feel it. When something is off and you can’t put your finger on it is just because he hasn’t shown you he is leading you on. Your intuition was made for this.

[Read: Is he a player or a gentleman? 13 clear giveaways]

Is he leading you on? Sadly, if you came looking for this article, he probably is. But, don’t worry. You can do better and you will.

The post Is He Leading You On? 16 Definitive Signs He’s Playing You for Fun is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.