How to Make Girls Chase You: 20 Secrets To Win Her Heart and Mind

When you get how to make girls chase you, then you know how to get the girl. The chase is everything in winning a girl’s affection and in time, her heart.

When you know how to get the girl, you’ll realize that winning her heart and affection is easy. There’s a reason why women are always viewed as complicated individuals. However, learning how to make girls chase you, that takes a deeper insight into women and their minds.

Honestly, the hard part is breaking down her walls to be comfortable around you – and to get her to chase you! Girls tend to have the hardest time trusting men and letting them in, even if their intentions are good and pure. The chase is all about the element of desire so when you get that from her, she’ll be interested in you.

This is what makes the chase so interesting for both men and women – it’s a challenge to make them fall for you. Desire is the difference between her telling you she’s always “busy” whenever you want to hang out, and her constantly asking you when you’re free and available to hang out with her.

[Read: How to make a girl miss you and think about you all day]

This is also why there are all these rules on how you should never call her immediately the next day or how you shouldn’t be too clingy too soon. Eventually, you’ll realize how absurd these rules are, but they also have a point.

Annoyingly, desire can be a hard thing to harness until you show her you’re worth the chase. If you show her you’re different from the other guys who showed up before you, then you have the beginnings of impressing her and capturing her interest.

[Read: 40 subtle traits of a guy that make him worthy of dating in all girls’ eyes]

Do you have to chase her to win her heart?

The honest answer to this is no, you really don’t. However, there’s a higher probability of her being your girlfriend when she ends up chasing you. There are times when you’re chasing a girl and none of your tactics are working.

You’re doing all the right things – spoiling her with gifts, handwritten letters, and even every grand gesture in the book. This is when knowing how to make girls chase you will come in handy.

It’s a reverse psychology tactic that will make her seek your attention and time instead of the other way around. If you’re desperately out of options or you just want to make her chase you for once, keep reading to find out! [Read: 20 failproof ways to manipulate women into falling hard for you]

20 tips that teach you how to make girls chase you

Have you tried everything to get a girl’s attention and nothing seems to be working? Maybe it feels like you’re losing a battle. You try so hard to play by the book, but she’s losing interest in you as every minute passes. Is it me? Is she out of my league? What things am I doing wrong?

These are the questions that passed by your mind. Don’t worry- we got you! In this feature, we’ll be discussing everything you need to know on how to make girls chase you. [Read: How to get a girl that’s out of your league and leave her smitten]

1. Play a little hard to get

When you act a little bit more difficult to figure out than most guys, the chances are she’ll want you more. After all, you want what you can’t have, right? Women play hard to get all the time and it’s because they already know how this reverse psychology tactic works.

If she knows you’re always available, then there’s no element of desire.

As mentioned earlier, desire is everything in knowing how to make girls chase you. However, be careful not to completely ignore her, or else she’ll get bored and move on to someone else. [Read: How to play hard to get with a girl just right]

2. Be devilishly charming

Don’t underestimate the power of charm in getting a girl to chase you or be interested in you. No, we’re not referring to flirting. *although, that could also work!* If you come across as suave and interesting, you stand out from the crowd, and she won’t be able to get enough.

There’s just something about being charming that girls won’t be able to get enough of. There’s also a big difference between charm and oversleazy so don’t confuse the two! [Read: 14 steps every Prince Charming must follow]

3. Make yourself physically irresistible

We know you think looks aren’t of much value for a woman *at least, that’s what they say*. However, what captivates a woman’s eyes in the way you look.

You don’t necessarily have to be Mr. Perfect, but you do have to look presentable and desirable. Looking clean and organized is simple enough to look attractive enough to make her chase you. [Read: What girls find attractive? 20 things guys do that make all girls love them]

4. Don’t be constantly available at all times

In knowing how to make girls chase you, don’t always be there whenever she looks for you. We know this sounds harsh, but how else will she miss you if you’re always available at the snap of her fingers? Give her the element of desire by not texting right the second that she does, and don’t cancel your plans for her.

If she senses you always cancel your plans to hang out, or blow your friends off just to spend time with her every day, she’ll start to think that you’re desperate. Desperation is the sign of someone that no one else is interested in.

5. Become friends with her friends

Becoming friends with her friends is the key to winning her heart. If her friends are against you, you might as well say goodbye to winning her heart, which is why this is an important factor.

It’s a known fact that if a girl’s friends thinks you’re great and can’t stop talking about you, then she thinks you’re great too. [Read: The most obvious and subtle signs your girlfriend’s friends just don’t like you]

6. Make sure you know what you’re doing in bed

We know you think sex isn’t that important when you’re just winning her, but don’t wait before it becomes an actual problem. There’s nothing worse than chasing a guy for ages, getting to know him, and having sexual chemistry—only for him to then turn out to be awful in bed.

Make sure you know what you’re doing physically and sexually to make her desire you. If she senses that you’re new to this without any idea what to do, this will set her off. A great way to make a girl stay interested is if you make her imagine you in between the sheets, and better yet, impress her in between the sheets too. [Read: 20 sex god moves to attract and seduce women in style]

7. Don’t let everything get to you

There’s nothing attractive about a guy who easily gets triggered or frustrated about things. You need to maintain your cool and put your best foot forward in learning how to make girls chase you.

Instead of letting circumstances, attitudes, or rejection annoy you, let them roll off your back. If she sees you’re a chilled-out guy, she’s more inclined to spend time with you.

8. Inspire her mind

Women crave mental intimacy more than anything. If you get her mind, then you’re already so close to getting her heart. If you want to know how to make girls chase you, don’t hesitate to show your intellectual side.

Engage in a deep conversation, ask her questions, reveal your curiosity for the world – she’ll love this! [Read: 25 deep questions to ask a girl and make her see your intellectual side]

9. Don’t annoy her

If you haven’t heard from her in a while, don’t send a flurry of text messages asking where she is or why you haven’t heard from her. Being perceived as clingy or needy will push her away from you entirely. If she doesn’t answer, don’t take that as a sign to smother her with texts.

Just give her room to breathe – you never know, she might be busy! Don’t be clingy as no one wants to date someone who can’t be left alone for five minutes. [Read: The serious warning signs of clingy guys and why girls avoid them]

10. Be emotionally available

The fastest way to turn a woman off is to be emotionally withdrawn whenever she needs you. Yes, play hard to get and keep it cool, but that doesn’t imply being emotionally detached from her. When she needs someone to talk to, somebody to give advice, or a shoulder to cry on, be there for her.

Validate her feelings and don’t tell her that she’s just overreacting or being dramatic. If she sees you as the kind of man who genuinely cares, she’ll never forget it. [Read: How to be a man the way he really should be]

11. Be loyal and trustworthy

Loyalty and trustworthiness are two characteristics that are admirable to any woman. If you want to know how to make girls chase you, prove that you’re loyal and trustworthy.

When she trusts you, then she’ll eventually give you her heart. If you’re someone she relies on to be honest, you’ll become someone she can’t easily replace.

12. Don’t come across as desperate

If there’s a central theme on how to make girls chase you, it’s to not come across as desperate. You can’t keep pushing yourself towards her, especially when she’s dropping hints for you to back away and give her some space. If she doesn’t respond to your calls, then move on and find someone else. Don’t cling.

One of the reverse psychology tactics you can use on her is to make it seem like you’re not afraid to walk away from her. Again, that’s the element of desire in action. [Read: How to make a girl jealous and leave her begging for attention]

13. Be confident!

Nothing is more attractive than a confident man who’s sure of himself and what he wants. If you show confidence in everything you do, in who you are, how you react to others, and what you stand for, you’ll attract so many women you won’t know what to do with all of them!

Of course, there’s a thin line that separates confidence from cockiness. Be sure not to go beyond that line or you’ll push her away! [Read: The subtle differences between a cocky and a confident man]

14. Treat her with respect

It can be very challenging for women to meet a man who respects her, no matter the circumstances. If you want to know how to make girls chase you, respect her, including her boundaries and her personal beliefs.

Give her space when she needs it, don’t cross boundaries that she’s specified, never demean her, and don’t be aggressive if she’s not doing exactly what you want. [Read: How to make a good first impression on a girl and leave her in awe]

15. Be kind, always

Girls are incredibly attracted to men who are compassionate toward others, keep a positive outlook, and stay good-natured. Your kindness reflects a lot about how you love and care for others.

If you can’t be kind, then that’s an automatic red flag for women. This doesn’t just mean being kind to her, but everyone you come across. [Read: How to impress a girl on a first date & guarantee a second one]

16. Keep it mysterious

You won’t get anywhere if you lay all your cards out in the open. The last thing a girl wants is knowing what to expect from a guy as it bores her out of her mind. What you need to do is to avoid becoming an open book.

Don’t tell her all your funny stories on a first date and don’t show her all your flaws yet. Keep the mystery flowing so she never knows what to expect from you! [Read: How to be mysterious without going completely overboard in the role]

17. Let her dominate every now and then

Look, equality is something that women desire passionately. If there’s anything women hate, it’s men treating her like a child as if she can’t do anything by herself.

Don’t assume that you always need to take the lead, let her do it as well! This isn’t saying don’t be chivalrous, but split the check with her or let her drive! Really, letting her take the lead will make her chase you and appreciate you! [Read: What is chivalry? The real meaning, the knight’s code, and modern men]

18. Sharpen your communication skills

Women are known for being verbal individuals so if you want to know how to make girls chase you, be an effective communicator.

If you’re the type who isn’t verbal with their stories, compliments, or really anything, you’re going to seem bland and boring in her eyes. Be talkative and communicate whatever you want!

19. Make her laugh

Making a woman laugh is one of the most underrated ways on how to make girls chase you. When you make her laugh, she will enjoy your company and want to be around you more often. After all, a man who can make a woman smile and laugh genuinely is a man worth keeping!

Don’t be afraid to use jokes and use even your cheesiest pick-up lines to make her laugh. Trust us, it’ll be all worth it. [Read: How to make a girl laugh, smile and like you instantly]

20. Get busy with your life

Honestly, this works wonders in knowing how to make girls chase you. She expects nothing but the best from you, so when you actually delay responding to her text immediately because you’re busy, that will pique her interest in you. This mystery will keep her on her toes and she’ll be the one wondering what’s happening to you.

Most importantly, it incorporates that element of desire that would encourage her to chase after you. *especially when she’s a little scared that she might be losing you!*

So, how do you make girls chase you?

The key here is to never act desperate and clingy. We’re sure you wouldn’t want someone who never gives you any room to breathe, so why are you doing this to her? Give her the element of desire and most importantly, surprise her.

No, don’t surprise her with gifts and grand gestures.

Rather, surprise her with your intentions. Don’t make your life all about her, but keep it mysterious. Turn down her plans when you’re busy, but always be there when she needs you.

[Read: The 15 atypical secrets you MUST know if you want to impress a girl and make her like you]

Once you figure out how to make girls chase you, everything that follows is a piece of cake! While the chase isn’t everything, it can certainly give her attention to you towards eventually winning her heart.

The post How to Make Girls Chase You: 20 Secrets To Win Her Heart and Mind is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Psycho Girlfriend: 16 Creepy Clues That Confirm Her Insanity

Having a psycho girlfriend is every guy’s nightmare, but how do you really identify the signs? Keep reading to know more before you get yourself stuck!

Have you ever experienced having a psycho girlfriend? If you haven’t, then you’re one of the lucky ones! From the word itself, they can literally drive you to the edge of your sanity!

It’s so important to beware of the telltale signs of a psycho girlfriend, especially if you’ve never encountered one before. You never know, this could be your next relationship and you’d save yourself a lot of mess by reading this!

Psycho, at least in this feature, just means the general expression of being creepier than most girlfriends. It means that a “psycho girlfriend” is someone who is extremely clingy, needy, and probably a bit unstable.

In short, she’ll make your life hell. She’s generally way more attached, clingy, and basically crazy! *and not in an adorable way!*

[Read: The 15 types of bad girlfriends who’ll make your life hell]

Why do psycho girlfriends exist?

A psycho girlfriend isn’t generally psycho because she wants to make your life a living hell. Rather, sometimes she can’t help it – it’s in her nature. Maybe she just gets attached too fast or maybe she wants to have a hold on you forever.

When it comes to psycho girlfriends, maybe they just love you too much to not let you see their crazy *and absolutely creepy* side. In all honesty, it’s inevitable to encounter a psycho girlfriend in your dating life.

You might date someone who wants to see you all the time or you might date someone who basically knows every detail of your life even if you didn’t tell them yet *creepy stalker alert!* Even if this is normal, it’s not exactly easy to deal with. [Read: How to help a possessive girlfriend go from cingy to amazing]

Psycho girlfriend: The 16 giveaways of a crazy girlfriend

Like in movies, victims of psychopaths usually don’t see it coming. But just like in movies, it really is obvious when you come to think about it. Here’s everything you need to know to recognize the signs of a crazy girlfriend.

1. She stares and stalks you when you sleep

You’ve probably woken to her staring at you adorably while you were sleeping. Sure, it’s cute and sweet, but if she does it every time you sleep, then be warned, my man! This is a surefire sign that she’s not just obsessed with you, but a psycho girlfriend.

Yes, it’s completely okay to adore our significant others, but when it comes off as creepy, that’s no longer okay! Those girls are usually the type to not only watch you sleep, but they actually might be keeping a close eye on you wherever you go.

Whatever form of stalking, they’re probably an expert at it. They’re watching your every move so you better watch out. Think: social media, hidden tracking devices, and a host of ingenious spy gadgets that will put James Bond to shame. [Read: The things girlfriends do that make them seem like a stalker]

2. She reads your texts

With a psycho girlfriend, there’s no such thing as respecting your privacy and boundaries. She wants to know everything there is to know about your life, including your private messages. Whether it’s your email, social media accounts, and text messages, she reads everything.

When you try to talk of boundaries, she either manipulates you by crying, storming out, being all hurt, or doing the silent treatment on you. Honestly, dealing with a psycho girlfriend is just so insane but it happens! [Read: How to set boundaries in dating – The 15 rules you must follow ASAP]

3. She knows all your passwords

Obviously, the only way she’d be able to read all your messages is if she knows all your passwords herself. This is one of the big red flags that you have a psycho girlfriend. Not only does she not trust you, but she wants to know everything in your private life.

There is nothing about this that’s healthy. If I were you, I’d stay far away from where she can’t see, hear, or touch you! Why would anyone in their right mind need the password to your Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram? [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship]

4. She hangs out with you and your buddies every single time

Again, a psycho girlfriend doesn’t understand the importance of respecting boundaries. In other words, she’s incapable of this and wants to be with you every chance she gets. She might seem like one of the boys at first – which is very cool and chill of her.

However, you’ll find her true colors start to reveal when you tell her you’re going to have a boys night without her. She’ll then go into suspicious mode. The suspicious girlfriend mode is when she asks you if there are other girls with you and if you say no, she probably won’t believe you.

Afterward, she’ll gaslight you into thinking it’s your fault rather than hers. She’ll cry, make you feel bad, and eventually, you would have to bring her along just so she feels safe.

5. She is very subtly manipulative

A psycho girlfriend knows the tricks because she uses them all the time. She can manipulate you into any situation she wants. This is one of the most frustrating things about dealing with her.

Even if you want to break up or leave her, she’ll manipulate you the best way she can. The worst part? It’s a manipulation that’s going to work. [Read: 16 tactics of psychological manipulation expert manipulators always use]

6. She calls in to “check on you” in the middle of the night

Your girlfriend has mastered the art of being psycho in the most subtle manners that you don’t even notice when it’s so obvious.

Your girlfriend could pretend that she’s just calling or facetiming you because she misses you, but she’s just checking if you’re not talking to other women. Sounds absurd, right? That’s because she is! [Read: 20 glaring signs of a control freak]

7. She texts you using different numbers to bait you

If your girlfriend has completely lost it, she’ll likely text you using different numbers, pretending to be a different girl, and see how you’ll react to each one. It’s insane how she’ll go through such great lengths to test your loyalty and love, but she’ll definitely do this.

This is just proof of her psychotic and unstable nature. The thing is, she might pass this off as a joke, and you might end up believing her! [Read: 10 reasons she has trust issues and 10 ways to fix them]

8. She’s on a first-name basis with your parents – and she texts them regularly

It might be a dream come true to have your girlfriend become close to your parents. However, it’s also a concrete sign of a psycho girlfriend, especially when you’ve only been dating for weeks! Nobody in their right mind would do this, so it’s pretty obvious that she’s not thinking clearly.

9. You always catch her looking at you from behind your back when you think you’re alone

We know you think this scenario only happens in the movies, but it’s more common than you think! There’s a difference between her adoring you from afar and just plain glaring at you, seeing what you’re up to.

How long has she been standing there, staring at you while you were on the computer? How long has she been eyeing you from behind while you were talking on the phone? If you don’t find this even the slightest creepy, something’s wrong with you.

10. She’s Facebook friends with almost half your college class – and she’s never met any one of them

Don’t you think it’s a little borderline crazy when she’s friends with half of your college friends without even meeting them? Even if we live in the digital era, this is still unusual behavior!

Why does she need to be sending memes with your college crush? Why does she feel the need to add every person you have on your friends list? Psycho alert! [Read: 15 signs your girlfriend is past crazy and clearly insane]

11. She posts statuses pretending to be you on your social media accounts without your knowledge

If you don’t see this as a concrete sign of a psycho girlfriend, you need to open your eyes to reality. She knows your passwords, which means she can easily pretend to be you and post statuses.

Are you okay with her changing your profile picture to her own face? Are you really entirely okay with her actually posting a sweet poem to herself from your own profile and pretending it was you who wrote it? Are you 100% fine with her using your account to like her own posts?

No matter how adorable she’s making it seem, there’s no excuse in the book that makes you think this is okay! [Read: 15 types of bad girlfriends who will make your life hell]

12. She’s completely delusional

We all mistake one thing for another from time to time, but a psycho girlfriend makes a habit out of this. Maybe you’re just waving to a friend or smiling at a meme while texting, but she makes it out to be something else entirely.

She doesn’t believe you even if you persist that it’s not what she thinks. It’s either she has a thing for drama or she’s really more psychotic than she’s letting on.

13. She’s extremely jealous to a fault

Jealousy and envy are both normal emotions in a relationship, but when she constantly gets jealous of practically everyone, this isn’t normal behavior. When her jealousy is making the relationship toxic and intolerable, then something’s definitely off.

Maybe she doesn’t want you talking to any girl at all or she gets jealous of any friends you have. Do you honestly think this is normal behavior? It doesn’t matter how pretty she is, the bottom line is that she’s psycho! [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship & learn to overcome it]

14. She has a story

There’s always a story behind every psycho girlfriend. After all, nobody grows up being psycho as if it’s part of their nature. Observe carefully her past, her family, her childhood – everything. Most often, the way she thinks and behaves all comes from the way she was brought up.

It might not make sense to you, but she might have a terrible past that caused this obsessive behavior. Of course, it’s still not an excuse for her actions, but it helps you understand things from her point of view. [Read: What are daddy issues? 19 ways to identify them in your girlfriend]

15. She never made you feel safe

A psycho girlfriend does a really good job at making you feel anxious and paranoid of basically everything. She constantly accuses you and causes drama in the relationship that safety is no longer an option. In fact, you can’t even remember the last time you felt safe and secure in a relationship with her.

You always expect things to go for the worst – that’s how crazy she actually is. Whether it’s manipulation, accusing you of something you never did, unwarranted jealousy – bring it on. [Read: How to feel secure in a relationship when you feel insecure inside]

16. She makes it impossible for you to leave

The last and final straw of dealing with someone psycho is when they make it almost impossible to leave. You have to basically force the facts in her face just to stop her from existing in your life. She’s so obsessive and manipulative that she thinks she can get away with having you forever.

This is why she’ll gaslight you whenever you get upset just to get the upper hand in every situation. In order to leave her, you really need to cut her off completely in your life and make sure she gets what you’re saying – that things are over and you’re breaking up with her. [Read: How to break up with a narcissistic girlfriend and fly out of her cage]

So, how do you deal with a psycho girlfriend?

Don’t ever go around thinking that you can change a psycho girlfriend into someone good for you. She’s so used to manipulating and gaslighting others that it’s going to be a burden for you to try and change her mind.

The only way to deal with her is to accept the facts and end the relationship for your own sake. Of course, some guys are okay with dating someone psycho. In that case, well, good for you!

[Read: 20 signs of a bad girlfriend and the easiest ways to spot them instantly]

When all is said and done, there are a lot of clues you can observe to know whether you are in a relationship with a psycho girlfriend. Remember they’re masters at manipulating you into getting what they want. Their insanity is so subtle that you never really notice it until you observe things a little more closely.

The post Psycho Girlfriend: 16 Creepy Clues That Confirm Her Insanity is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Tell if a Girl Is Flirting With You: 20 Signs You Can’t Miss

It’s not the easiest thing to know how to tell if a girl is flirting with you. Is she just being friendly with you or does she want something more?

You might not realize the importance of knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, but it’s a significant skill. Otherwise, you might mistake her friendliness for something else entirely and embarrass yourself.

If you’ve got your eye on a cute girl, you obviously want to know, as soon as possible, whether she feels the same way about you. There’s a thin line separating friendship and flirting, and if you don’t know how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, then you might lose your chance on a date!

While flirting isn’t everything, it’s a pretty strong indicator if someone likes you or not. In fact, flirting is one of the few things you do to let someone know you like them.

[Read: How to flirt with girls – 25 effortless secrets to win any girl over]

Why is knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you important?

When you know the signs, you can take it as a stepping stone to make a move on your crush. Maybe she laughed at one of your jokes or she keeps unintentionally touching your arm. You can use this as an assurance that she doesn’t just see you as a friend and wants to be something more.

While she might not say it directly, her actions and body language speak louder than words ever can. If you know how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, then this can be really great for your dating life!  After all, you can spot the concrete signs when a girl is hinting at you to make a move. [Read: Should I ask her out? 30 signs she’s waiting for you to make a move]

How to tell if a girl is flirting with you – Is she really flirting or friend-zoning?

It’s not the easiest thing to tell if a girl is flirting with you. It’s so easy for guys to ignore the signs of a girl flirting with them, even when it’s so obvious – all because they assume it’s just her being playful or friendly.

Understanding whether a girl is flirting with you or just being friendly can be tricky.

You want to know whether she has put you in the “friend zone,” or if there is potentially something more. So, if you are wondering if she’s flirting with you, then look out for these signs!

1. She touches her hair

Hair touching is a good sign a girl is flirting with you. If she constantly plays with her hair even when she’s by herself, twisting it between her fingers, flicking it to the side, or tucking it behind her ears, this body language shows she’s a little self-conscious.

However, if you notice that she’s always touching or twisting her hair when she’s talking to you or near you, then she’s flirting with you. This is one of the concrete things you should know when learning how to tell if a girl is flirting with you.

Touching her collar bone or neck means the same thing, so look out for this! [Read: Are you boring her? 20 clear signs that she’s not interested]

2. She maintains eye contact

Eye contact is one of the obvious signs of flirting. After all, why would she hold strong eye contact if she simply sees you as a friend? This holds true whether you look at each other from across a room, or whether you chat with her directly.

If she pauses and looks into your eyes even when she isn’t saying something, she is definitely trying to let you know that she is attracted to you. The eyes are the window to the soul for a reason.

3. She laughs a lot

It’s completely normal for girls to laugh all the time, but if she laughs more when she’s around you, then she’s flirting. In learning how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, notice the sound of her laugh and if it’s the same with you compared to others. Is it a higher pitch?

Does she always laugh at your jokes? Does she find you funny? When she does laugh, does she deliberately put her hand on your arm? It’s these things that can indicate whether it’s flirting or just friendship.

Girls love guys with a sense of humor, and her laughter speaks volumes about the way she feels about you! [Read: How to be funny and make any girl love your company]

4. She touches you

Whether you believe it or not, she’s really not that clumsy if she’s constantly touching you. The most obvious sign in knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you is when she actively breaks the touch barrier.

If she reaches out to touch your arm or your hand or even bumps into you playfully or always giving you cuddles, these are surefire signs she’s flirting with you and wants to take things further.

5. She always responds

If you text her or contact her in her socials and she always responds to you quickly and consistently, this could no longer be signs of friendship. When a girl likes you, then you have her full undivided attention.

She won’t miss a beat texting you and getting the chance to talk to you. If she always responds to you and doesn’t keep you waiting too long, it means she is into you and flirting with you for sure. [Read: What to text a girl – Dos, dont’s and all the secrets to follow]

6. She gets in touch first

If she doesn’t wait for you to message or call her and is the one taking the initiative, she is trying to tell you she likes you. When knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, a girl who likes you isn’t afraid to make the first move.

She doesn’t hesitate to call you first, text you, or even invite you to hang out. This is the 21st century after all, why shouldn’t she made the first move if she likes you, right?

7. She’s keen to meet up

Does she always suggest meeting up with you? Even if you bump into each other in a chance encounter? If you find she’s always looking for ways to meet up even when there weren’t plans, then she’s into you!

It could be a school project or maybe she left something at your place *even when that’s not true*. [Read: 15 subtle signs a girl wants your attention and really likes you already]

8. She makes fun of you

This is such an obvious sign of flirting, but a lot of people mistake this for friendship. When she goes out of her way to tease you and make fun of you, she’s obviously flirting with you!

Don’t hesitate to tease her back if you do like her. Both boys and girls use the teasing technique to show a person that they like them. [Read: 18 easy ways to tease a friend and flirt without making things weird]

9. She turns the conversation to something more sexual

Is she always making your conversations about sex? Or ‘joking’ about what a good couple you would be? Unless you’ve never flirted before or live under a rock, this is obviously flirting!

Friends don’t just joke around sex for absolutely no reason. She could be hinting around to be more than just friends. [Read: 7 signs a girl gives away if she wants to sleep with you]

10. She compliments you

If she always says she likes the way you look or compliments you on your intelligence, humor, talent, etc., it’s because she thinks you are great and hopes you will ask her out.

In knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, watch out for how she compliments you. If she does this specifically to you and not to anyone else, she definitely likes you! She’s trying to earn your attention through compliments.

11. She invites you to compliment her

If she flirts with you, she gives you plenty of opportunities to compliment her. She’ll say things like “What do you think of my hair?” and “Do you like this top?”

If you like her back, take the hint and tell her how nice she looks today or notice the changes in her appearance. This would definitely make her day! [Read: How to seduce a friend subtly and find out if she’s into you as well]

12. She tickles you

She wants to touch you but she doesn’t want to make it too obvious that she likes you, as she isn’t sure how you will respond. So, what is the obvious thing to do?

Tickle you, of course! The best thing about this is it doesn’t reveal her cover – unless you notice it, of course. She could be just playful but more often than not, she’s trying to subtly flirt with you. [Read: 15 body language cues a girl gives away if she likes you]

13. She borrows your clothes

Does that favorite hoodie of yours always seem to be around her shoulders instead of on you? Girls do this all the time and you can see this behavior when girls borrow their boyfriend’s clothes to feel closer to them.

If learning how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, notice how often she borrows your clothes *and basically everything you wear*.

14. She tries to make you blush

Contrary to popular belief, boys blush too! If she says or does things to try and make you blush, she’s kind of testing the waters.

Especially when she’s known you for a long period, then her trying to make you blush will be easy for her when she knows what things make you smile and make your heart flutter.

If you do end up blushing, this is her assurance that you feel the same way! [Read: Chick magnet alert: What makes a guy the total package?]

15. She gets dressed up around you

A girl always dresses to impress, especially when she knows she’s going to see her crush. In knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, watch how she dresses around you and observe the outfit she wears around you versus other people.

If she’s more fashionable around you, then she’s trying to get you to notice her!

16. Her voice gets lower

Women’s voices get lower when they are attracted to someone and flirting with them. Make sure you look out for this, and if you notice her voice changing when she speaks to you, it’s probably because she is flirting with you.

This is an underrated sign of flirting, but it’s definitely an indicator! [Read: 20 physical signs of female arousal to recognize the horny girl mode]

17. She acts coy

Does she go all cute, shy, and demure around you? She clearly wants you to see her as sweet and girly. If you notice her act differently *specifically more feminine around you*, then she might like you more than you think!

After all, why else would her behavior change if she doesn’t like you? [Read: How to ask a girl if she likes you *without really asking*]

18. She flirts with other guys around you

This isn’t an obvious sign of flirting that guys are aware of, but women use this tactic all the time! After all, jealousy and envy are both such powerful strategies in flirting with your crush.

This may sound counterintuitive, but one way she may well be flirting with you is by going up to other guys and flirting with them instead! Especially when you notice her giving you glances even when talking to another guy, she’s trying to get your attention and make you jealous. [Read: 30 wicked things most girls do to make a guy jealous and get his attention]

19. She asks you lots of questions

When a girl likes you but doesn’t want to make it obvious, the focus of the conversation is you and nobody else. She wants to get to know you deeply to be able to connect with you better.

When she asks you questions and it seems like she’s genuinely interested in your life, she might already be flirting!

20. She remembers the little details

The same way you remember even the little details of someone you like, the same goes for her. If she remembers what your favorite coffee is or what you did last weekend, it might not just be the friendship she’s expressing.

In knowing how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, watch how she remembers the small details of your life. [Read: What women find attractive: 16 traits girls instantly fall for]

So, how to tell if a girl is flirting with you?

If you know the signs, then you’d be able to tell the difference between a girl flirting with you and expressing her friendship.

More often than not, she laughs at your jokes, breaks the touch barrier, gives you compliments, and basically does everything to get your attention. After all, when you like someone, you want them to notice you as much as possible.

[Read: What to do when a girl likes you – The right steps you need to make YOUR move]

So there you have it—if you want to know how to tell if a girl is flirting with you, the key is to pay close attention! You might think it’s just friendship, but she could already be subtly letting you know that she’s into you. That’s your window of opportunity to then make a move!

The post How to Tell if a Girl Is Flirting With You: 20 Signs You Can’t Miss is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Do You HAVE to Be Your Group's Alpha to Look Good?

When you go out with the guys, do you need to be the alpha male? What if your girlfriend is there and she’s watching – will she lose respect for you if you’re not alpha?

On my article about screening vs. qualifying, reader therock asked about the necessity of being the alpha male:

Hey Chase,

I'm not sure there's an article about this specific issue on the site so I thought I'd ask.

I noticed a curious thing when I'm with my girlfriend in a social circle situation.

Say we're all going to get pizza, all close friends, including my girlfriend.

Now there's always someone who's in the lead.

Simple stuff like where to go, what to check out, etc

While I'm clearly in the leadership position with my girlfriend, I find myself in a situation where we're both being led by another guy.

I'm much more of an interpersonal leadership kinda guy. One to one with a girl I clearly lead. But in groups, it's a bit different.

I considered trying out leading he group but found it counter effective for these reasons:

1. One guy's gonna come out of top and if it's not me, I lose even more power points for trying AND failing.
2. Most of the time the guy was doing an excellent job at leading the group. He knows the best restaurants, knows where we'll have a good time (he knows the city much more than the rest of us). So no one's complaining. I've had situations where other guys made leadership faux pas and i jumped in, doing what's best for the group.
3. The leader is my friend, not hostile and never pulls crap like trying to flirt with my girlfriend.

My question to you: is it mandatory that I always lead any group I find myself in with my girlfriend?

What is its impact on attraction?

And what can one do to minimise the effects of being led by another man in front of his girl?

This is a good question, and it's a common one for guys who're starting out.

The answer is a bit nuanced, too.

Do Guys Like to Cuddle? 19 Truths You Never Before Knew

It’s a fact that women love cuddling as it’s a great sign of affection. It also makes you think what does cuddling mean to guys? Is it love or just casual?

Maybe it’s society or men’s ego, but they never seem to admit they like cuddling. It really leaves you wondering – what does cuddling mean to guy? Do they do it just to make women happy, or because they genuinely want to? The answer to this might surprise you, or maybe it’s something you’ve known all along.

No matter what a guy says when you ask, do guys like to cuddle, they all like cuddling when it’s with someone they care about and want to be around. They can act as tough and manly as they want, but at the end of the day, they love nothing more than for you to curl up in their arms and rest your head on their shoulder.

They might not say it often, but they appreciate the feeling of being cuddled, especially with someone they love. In fact, sometimes they even love cuddling more than women. *but they’d never say this, of course!*

[Read: How to cuddle with a guy: Snuggle secrets you HAVE to know]

The benefits of cuddling

There are so many benefits you get from cuddling alone. It doesn’t just feel good, but it seriously benefits your physical, emotional, and even mental health. After reading this, you’d really want to cuddle with someone!

Cuddling relaxes you, deepens the bond you have with your significant other, and even reduces stress and blood pressure. Not to mention, it helps you cope with difficult emotions like anxiety and depression.

When you’re having a bad day or you feel your mental health declining, don’t hesitate to cuddle your favorite person! This must also be why men *secretly* love to cuddle as well. [Read: How to spoon right – 11 tips to make spooning more intimate]

Where did the notion of men not liking cuddling come from?

Men are generally perceived as individuals who don’t like showing or even feeling their emotions. When they show vulnerability *even in an affectionate gesture like cuddling,* it can affect their reputation of being masculine.

Society thinks that when men admit they like cuddling, they’re weak, pathetic, or feminine, when this isn’t true at all. Men are allowed to like cuddling just as much as women do, especially with the several benefits it gives your body. [Read: The very surprising benefits of cuddling and how it makes your life better]

Also, when you cuddle your partner more often, you make them feel loved, which is one of the keys to a long-lasting relationship. In answering the question, what does cuddling mean to guys, it’s as simple as an act of love.

For men, cuddling gives them a space to be themselves without any judgment or criticism in being vulnerable – that’s what it really means.

The truths you never knew about why guys like to cuddle

We’ve established the fact that guys like to cuddle with someone they really like. But why is it they actually enjoy cuddling? Do they just like having someone hold them? Do they feel more loved? These are questions you’ll get more answers to as we read this feature on what does cuddling mean to guys.

1. It allows them to be vulnerable

Guys really like to appear like a solid piece of man handling anything life throws at them. It seems that guys will do everything as to not be or appear vulnerable, but they’re human and they have their moments.

What cuddling mean for guys is that it’s a space to become their vulnerable selves without judgment. They like the sense of peace they have during a good cuddle session. [Read: 16 non-sexual touches that make two people feel connected and loved]

2. They like making you feel safe

Part of the masculinity of men is wanting to protect you and keep you safe. When they cuddle with you, they know you feel safe and secure in their arms.

Even if there aren’t any real dangers, guys perceive cuddling as a way to protect you. In addition, they also know it makes you feel loved, so when they cuddle you, it’s also a sign of affection and warmth.

3. It makes them feel important

If you’re curious on what does cuddling mean to guys, it gives them a sense of importance. When you cuddle someone, it’s one of the most intimate acts you can engage in with your partner that isn’t about sex – it’s just about being there.

Although it isn’t obvious, it makes them feel important and as if they’re the only person that matters in that moment. This is one of the most underrated reasons why guys are lowkey fond of cuddling. [Read: 15 sweet ways to make a man feel needed and wanted]

4. They like close contact

When you cuddle with someone, you’re making direct skin-to-skin contact with them. This is the reason why cuddling is such an intimate act, not just enjoyed by women, but men as well. There’s actually a scientific reason for this, too.

Cuddling releases a chemical called oxytocin *the feel-good hormone* making them feel happy. After all, would you miss out on the chance on being filled with these happy hormones? [Read: The health benefits of hugging thta’ll make you want to cuddle more]

5. Men even sleep better when they cuddle!

It’s not just coincidence that you fall asleep faster when you’re cuddling someone, but it’s actually proven by studies. Especially when you fall asleep next to someone you love, even better!

6. There’s no pressure involved with cuddling

Cuddling is literally the simplest and most innocent thing you can do with someone without worrying about your insecurities and flaws. If wondering what does cuddling mean to guys, they don’t have to feel pressured to perform their best *unlike sex*.

They can’t do it wrong, they can’t be bad at it, and there’s no one to judge their cuddles like there can be in any other aspect in dating you. [Read: How to feel more confident in your body and fall in love with you]

7. They like the level of intimacy it offers without sex

Contrary to popular belief, not all guys want sex all the time. Sometimes, they just want to be intimate with you without sex – which is basically what cuddling can provide.

They like the closeness they get without having to take each other’s clothes off. [Read: Skin hunger and the human need to touch someone so badly]

8. They like the comfort

When asking what does cuddling mean to guys, it’s the most comfortable you can do with someone. There’s just something so relaxing and comfortable about a mundane act like cuddling.

It might not look much, but it feels like everything! Cuddling relaxes guys. They find it really comfortable to be tangled up with you on the couch watching their favorite show.

9. They feel manly

Not much makes a guy feel manlier than supporting the weight of their woman as she lies on top of them—other than her being naked, we suppose.

As mentioned earlier, it makes a man feel like he’s protecting her as he has his arms wrapped around her. It couldn’t possibly get any more manly than that. [Read: How to attract men though his manliness – The secrets no one ever talks about]

10. They like making you happy

It’s not exactly a secret that women are huge cuddlers so when a guy loves you, he’ll naturally want to cuddle with you. When you’re happy, then he’s also happy – and this is what love is all about. Love is about making your partner as happy as they can possibly be, whatever it takes. [Read: 15 what-if questions to ask your boyfriend to grow closer]

11. They love you

It doesn’t get any more real than this, but a guy cuddles with you because he loves you. Unlike sex, you really don’t get anything out of cuddling. So if he does this with you, then he loves you! You can now stop doubting what does cuddling mean to guys, especially when he does this out of love.

12. It’s an incomparable feeling

Even if it’s not as intimate as sex, it’s really something that nothing else can compare. This is why when they’re cuddling with you and you maybe rub his back or just play with his hair, it’s so satisfying yet underrated. It’s probably why guys love cuddling so much.

13. They can share everything

When asking what does cuddling mean to guys, it’s not just something you do in silence. Oftentimes *especially when you love the person*, you can’t help but cuddle and talk to them about everything.

Whether it’s deep conversations or laughing about the silliest things, this is definitely what makes cuddling so exceptional. Maybe that’s why guys feel so safe when cuddling – they can share everything and won’t be judged for it. [Read: How to get a guy to open up and share more with you]

Reasons he might not like to cuddle

If you don’t think these reasons apply to the guy you’re currently seeing, there are a lot of reasons why guys don’t like to cuddle.

1. They don’t actually like you that much

We know this stings, but it’s the harsh truth. When you’re asking what cuddling mean to guys because they keeps avoiding it with you, it might be caused by a lack of feelings.

If a guy doesn’t like to cuddle, it could have to do with his feelings for you and not the actual cuddling itself. Guys would be crazy to turn down cuddling, after all! [Read: 12 science-backed clues to know if a guy likes you for sure]

2. They’re too hot

There’s literally a time and place for everything. It’s completely understandable when they don’t want to cuddle when the sun is practically raging with heat.

Cuddling already warms you up by combining body heat, but when they’re already really hot, they’re not going to want your 98.6-degree body all over them. It’s probably why cuddling is best done in a hotel room and maybe not at the beach.

3. Their limbs are falling asleep

As much as you want to stay in a cuddling position forever, you really can’t. Girls have the luxury of usually getting to lay on top of their boyfriend because they’re smaller. But this also means a guy’s limbs bear the brunt of the weight and end up falling asleep.

Don’t take it against them when they puts their arms off your head – maybe their arms just hurt *but they adore you too much to say so!*

4. They’re guarding themselves because of something that happened

When asking what does cuddling mean to guys, maybe they do have feelings for you – but they’re still traumatized by the past. Some guys have serious intimacy issues because of a past relationship or a traumatic life experience.

Most probably, it’s because of an ex who made them think that every relationship is going to turn to flames. After all, it’s really easy to get attached to someone after cuddling *which is probably why people avoid doing it after casual sex*. [Read: 13 weird, unique ways to build intimacy with your partner]

5. They’re just not a fan of close contact

Some guys, actually, many people in general, have issues with being in close contact and staying attached to each other during intimate moments. Maybe they get claustrophobic or they just don’t like being touched constantly, but don’t take it personally.

They can still have feelings for you, but not be a fan of cuddling. There’s nothing wrong with them. It’s just a personal preference changing with time, but oftentimes it won’t. [Read: How to cuddle: Cuddling positions to be a loving cuddler]

6. They don’t want a relationship

Cuddling is often seen in relationships, and if they’re just not ready for that kind of commitment, they’ll do everything to avoid this. It’s a pretty direct and straightforward message.

If they refuse to cuddle with you, they’re avoiding any complications such as you becoming attached or developing any unwanted feelings. Their intentions are purely casual and they don’t want things to be more than that. [Read: He likes you but doesn’t want a relationship?! How to deal with this]

So, what does cuddling mean to guys?

More often than not, guys cuddle with you because they love you and they want to enjoy a mundane yet intimate connection with you.

When they cuddle with you, it’s a safe space to be vulnerable and be themselves without fear that society’s going to judge them. It’s also a way for them to make you happy in a simple manner.

[Read: Does he love me? 37 signs he’s past like and totally in love with you]

The big, grand mystery of the question “what does cuddling mean to guys?” has finally been answered. So, did you know the answer all along or did what you find actually surprise you this time?

The post Do Guys Like to Cuddle? 19 Truths You Never Before Knew is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Romantic Orientation: The Most Common Ones All of Us Must Know

The majority of the population might know the different sexual orientations, but what about romantic orientations? Keep reading to find out more about this.

There’s a huge difference between who you’re sexually attracted to, and romantically attracted to. With romantic orientations, this refers to who you tend to develop romantic feelings to.

For instance, you could identify as asexual, but your romantic orientation is towards both men and women. Knowing your romantic orientation can help you connect with yourself better and be more aware of your current relationships.

Your sexual orientation may play a huge role in your relationship but your romantic orientation is an even bigger part. This also helps you avoid offending anyone as you can make all the wrong assumptions. [Read: 15 signs you’re asexual and don’t like getting laid as much as others]

Why is knowing romantic orientation important?

Without knowing your own orientation – and others as well – you could end up mislabeling people. You could assume that you’ve always been straight your whole life without knowing why you only get attracted to the same gender without wanting sex with them.

Even as you’ve tried same-sex relationships, it never works out the way you want it to. This is because you’re more focused on sexual orientation rather than romantic orientation.

When you let yourself learn more about why the people you connect with sexually are different from who you’re attracted to, it explains a lot about who you are – including the way you love.

Romantic orientation is just as important as your sexual orientation. And together, it forms the bigger picture of your needs and wants in a relationship.

Sexual orientation vs romantic orientation: what’s the difference?

Don’t feel bad if you thought they were the same thing.

The truth is, many people don’t realize that there are different types of orientations. Sexual orientation refers to who you’re physically attracted to. In other words, who you see yourself getting into bed with.

On the other hand, romantic orientation refers to who you develop an emotional or mental connection with. You can absolutely have sex with someone without having romantic feelings with them, which is where the difference between both sexual and romantic attraction lies.

[Read: Building a romantic connection through emotional attraction]

What are the different types of romantic orientations out there?

Again, it’s so important to know the different romantic orientations, not just for yourself, but for others as well. It can help you better understand the bigger picture of relationships as a whole. Here’s everything you need to know about the different existing romantic orientations.

1. Aromantic

This is one of the romantic orientations that tend to feel excluded or misunderstood. We always have the assumption that everyone likely has romantic feelings, but this isn’t always the case.

For an aromantic, they have absolutely no desire to form a romantic connection with a person and they can’t feel that emotion at all. In fact, they might’ve even grown up wondering if something was wrong with them.

They just don’t feel that romantic connection with anyone, however, they can still feel a sexual connection with someone. With this being said, even if they can’t develop romantic feelings for anyone, doesn’t mean they can’t have strong friendships.

This is simply limited in the romantic sense and not so much in the platonic sense. [Read: Aromantic dilemma – 16 myths and truths about their love]

2. Biromantic

We’re sure by now you’re picking up that many of these romantic orientations are very similar to the names of sexual orientations. This would mean this one is when someone is attracted to both men and women romantically.

As a biromantic, you can develop strong romantic feelings for both men and women without the implication you’ll develop a sexual connection with them as well. Again, both orientations are very different that way. [Read: Biromantic vs. bisexual – how to understand the difference]

3. Heteroromantic

This romantic orientation means that you’re attracted to a different gender than your own. This is also oftentimes paired with a person’s sexual orientation, but not always.

More often, someone’s sexual orientation can be bisexual or even fluid while their romantic orientation remains heteroromantic. It’s completely normal to have one romantic orientation that’s completely opposite from your sexual orientation.

4. Homoromantic

As a homoromantic, you’re romantically attracted to the same gender as yourself. If you identify as a woman, you’ll likely have romantic feelings for women as well.

Again, the notion is that you’re a homosexual, but this isn’t always an accurate assumption. You can be romantically attracted to the same gender while being sexually connected to the opposite gender. [Read: Homoromantic – The facts you need to know to really understand it]

5. Panromantic

If you’ve heard of pansexuals, then you should atleast have the slightest clue of what a panromantic is. This romantic orientation might not be as common, but it means they’re romantically attracted not to the gender, but the personality.

No matter what gender they are, there’s absolutely no bias. A person’s gender has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not they will feel romantically connected with them. [Read: Panromantic asexual – the truth you need to know]

6. Polyromantic

It’s easy to get polyromantics and panromantics confused, but they’re very much different. The fact is, being polyromantic is when someone can form a romantic attraction for multiple genders, but not all of them.

There’s still a gender bias with this romantic orientation unlike that of panromantics. Even if they’re attracted to all genders, that still doesn’t make them panromantic. [Read: Polyromantic relationships and an easy guide to simplify a confusing label]

7. Gray-romantic

Gray-romantics can be often confused for aromantics for an adequate number of reasons. As a gray-romantic, you rarely feel romantic attraction for anyone, but it’s there. They don’t experience it very often and when they do, there’s no rhyme or reason to it.

You might’ve grown up not feeling any sort of romantic attraction until it just happens. Those who are gray-romantic don’t know what makes them feel romance every now and then.

It can be completely sporadic and there’s not a single trait nor person who can make them feel it. In the same sense, it can also be confused with demiromantics, which we’ll get to in a bit. [Read: Graysexual – what it is and the common qualities of graysexuality]

8. Demiromantic

Demiromantics can feel romantic attraction, but only when they’ve developed a deep emotional connection with someone. This means if there isn’t a connection, they likely won’t have feelings for that person.

It takes them a long time and a deeper understanding of an individual before they can have those types of feelings for them. Both demiromantics and demisexuals are linked together, but they aren’t always the same. You can feel a romantic attraction with someone without still wanting that sexual aspect as a demiromantic. [Read: The most important traits that make someone a demiromantic]

9. Sapioromantic

If you’ve always been romantically attracted to intelligence and knowledge, there’s a term for that – sapioromantic. Its counterpart is sapiosexual, which refers to only being sexually attracted to someone of intelligence or intellect.

This romantic orientation means that you can’t just be with anyone – you need to have a mental connection with them. This means you fall in love faster when someone shows you a part of their mind. [Read: Are you a sapiophile? 13 traits that make someone a lover of wit]

10. Autoromantic

This romantic orientation might seem unusual to you at first, but there’s actually a term for developing romantic feeling for one’s self – an autoromantic. You develop feelings for yourself more than anyone else.

Even as you’ve tried to develop feelings for other genders or sexualities, nothing comes close to the feelings you have for yourself. It’s an underrated orientation, but it’s very much valid.

11. Androromantic

As an androromantic, you tend to develop romantic feelings for those with masculine features. You’re probably thinking this means that they only fall for men, but this isn’t the case. They fall for any person, no matter the gender, who has masculine features.

12. Gynoromantic

Gynoromantics are the opposing side of androromantics, where they develop romantic feelings for those with feminine features. For instance, they may fall for a man who has soft features and basically anyone who has feminine qualities in their body or physical appearance.

13. Pomoromantic

Not a lot of people know this romantic orientation, including its sexual orientation counterpart. Pomoromantics don’t identify with any of the romantic labels, whereas pomosexuals don’t identify with any of the sexuality labels. In other words, they refuse to be categorized in labels.

[Read: 17 modern dating terms to help you master the evolving dating game]

How romantic orientation often works

The thing about romantic orientation is that it’s usually coupled with a person’s sexual orientation. That means if someone is heterosexual, they’re usually heteroromantic, as well. The gender they prefer sexually is oftentimes the same gender they have a romantic attraction for.

Or at least, that’s what everyone else assumes. However, this isn’t always the case. You can have feelings for someone and have a different sexual attraction to someone. That doesn’t make you unusual or weird, but that’s just your sexual and romantic orientation being at play.

This is also why instead of being monogamous and having only one life partner, they have two or three or even more. It’s not cheating, especially when both parties are aware of the conditions of this kind of relationship. It might seem complicated to you, but for others, that’s the only way to satisfy both their emotional and sexual needs.

[Read: Different types of attraction and which is vital for true love]

What you should remember about all orientations

Even if you don’t understand some of the romantic orientations *or even sexual orientations*, all of them are valid. You might not resonate with it, but it’s important to learn about them. Otherwise, you might offend someone you come across that has a different romantic orientation than you.

Even on your personal front, if you’ve ever been confused about your romantic orientation, this could really explain a lot of things about who you are and why you function the way you do in relationships.

[Read: List of sexualities – What you need to know about each orientation]

Romantic orientation isn’t something many people think about or consider. Even if it isn’t as known, it’s just as important as sexual orientation or your gender. It explains the way you develop attraction and feelings for someone, after all.

The post Romantic Orientation: The Most Common Ones All of Us Must Know is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

How to Get Over Your First Love with a Happy Memory

Your first love is the one relationship you’ll never forget. But it’s not always the love that lasts, so you need to know how to get over your first love.

It’s so important to learn how to get over your first love. Why? Your first love is something you’ll remember for a lifetime. And many do say that your first love never dies, but honestly, this saying isn’t really true.

Rather, first love is the one that will break your heart. If you’re unlucky, it’s the one experience that will teach you that love isn’t always perfect. Sometimes, it’s full of pain and an all-consuming feeling.

If you’re that unlucky, your first love makes you want to avoid love altogether. Your first love may have started like a fairytale, but before you knew it, one bad thing may have led to another, and then another.

Until both of you have no choice but to part ways. Most likely, your experience with first love has ended badly if you’re reading this.

[Read: The reason behind why love hurts so much when it goes bad]

Why does first love end?

As much as we’d like to think first love lasts forever, it doesn’t always happen that way. First love ends so we can learn from it and apply it to all our future relationships. You might’ve given your all and it hurt like a bitch when it ended, but that’s the reality of life.

There’s no changing the facts – your relationship is over and you need to learn how to get over your first love. No matter who broke up with who, maybe it ended so you can grow from the pain, or maybe the love wasn’t enough to make the relationship work.

First love is basically your first experience of what falling in love is and the sad truth is, you always expect the best outcome. We never see it coming when the relationship ends in a fraction of a moment and when we’re forced to face a reality without them.

Nobody tells you that you have to learn how to get over your first love because it most likely never works out. [Read: How your first love affects all your future relationships]

How to get over your first love

There’s no concrete way on how to get over your first love. This kind of pain is so excruciating that it feels difficult to bear. However, you just take it day by day until one day, you don’t miss them as much anymore.

If you’ve just broken up with your first love, you know just how terrible it can feel. It’s like your heart is shattered into a million pieces, and you don’t care about anything but getting rid of the pain.

I know every fiber of your fiber wants to get them back and do everything just to make them choose you again. Sadly, this isn’t the reality and you need to face this unbearable loss. The good news about this is that you’re not alone.

Even if your heartbreak convinces you that you are, trust me, you’re not. We’ve all been there, and as painful as it may feel today, it will all pass and you’ll feel a lot better and happier sooner than you think.

Just take it gradually and no matter what, don’t be so desperate in numbing your feelings. You need to feel them if you want to move on.

[Read: 13 things you MUST know just as you enter a relationship with someone]

The 10 steps that WILL help you get over your first love

As painful as the scar of first love may seem, it will heal. Remember these steps, and you will have everything you need to know on how to get over your first love.

1. Don’t try to forget it

First experiences are always special and memorable so don’t hate them or forcing yourself to forget them. Even if it’s tempting to forget even the good moments, appreciate everything while it lasted.

You’re never going to get another experience like this one, and forgetting it completely isn’t a good idea. As the saying goes, it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

The pain may be fresh in your heart today but soon, you’ll forget all about it as long as you let the wound heal naturally. Also, you tend to move on harder when you try your hardest to forget them. [Read: First broken hearts club – How to move on when you experience heartbreak for the first time ever]

2. Realize it’s not the end of the world

Heartbreak does this thing where it convinces you that it’s the end of the world, even when it’s not. As cliche as this sounds, the sun will rise again and so will you. Yes, it hurts. But guess what, you’re still alive and kicking.

If you can make up your mind to stand up and face the world, you’ll find it easier to cope with the pain. At the end of the day, there’s more to life than just falling in love.

3. Get help from your friends

The number one rule is to never dwell in isolation when moving on from your first love. If you want to know how to get over your first love, then surround yourself with friends and loved ones.

They’re the people who will remind you that you have still have so much love in your life, even if things didn’t work out with one specific person. Most importantly, they’re the people who will listen to you cry and talk about your first love for hours relentlessly.

Spend time with them or speak to a trusted friend about how you feel. Sometimes, even talking about it can help you feel better. In this sense, you shouldn’t also use your heartbreak as an excuse for being a bad friend.

Be nice to your friends even when you’re going through something – they deserve at least that. [Read: How a friend can help you through a breakup with minimal drama]

4. Keep yourself occupied

Honestly, the best way on how to get over your first love is to keep yourself occupied. Distract yourself from your first love by doing things you really enjoy. Your first heartbreak can feel like a critical illness.

What works for most people is keeping yourself so busy that you don’t have the time to miss them or even think about them. The next time you start to feel the pain, take that as an opportunity to go for a run, take a trip outside, or even try a new hobby.

As long as you’re distracted, then you’re good *as long as they’re healthy distractions.* You’ll feel like you can never get back on your feet again. It’ll feel bad, but you’ll feel better sooner than you think.

5. Don’t try to get back to your partner

Your first love doesn’t always have to be the true love of your life. You need to realize that it ended for a reason. By chasing them or begging for their love, you’re just proving even further why the relationship can’t work.

If you want to know how to get over your first love, don’t come crawling back to them the second that you miss them. It might hurt, but the pain of enduring and forcing that relationship will hurt even more – I assure you that. [Read: 20 signs your ex wants you back and can’t stop thinking of you]

6. Look at it as a learning lesson

At the end of the day, you have two choices – dwell on your heartbreak or use it to grow for your next relationships.

Every relationship that fails is an opportunity to become better so when you do meet the right person, you’ll be ready. Look at your breakup as a learning lesson and feel good about the experience instead of hating it.

7. Pick flaws

We tend to focus more on the good rather than the bad moments, making us believe that the relationship was absolutely perfect. However, if you want to learn how to get over your first love, you need to open your eyes to both their strengths and weaknesses.

Now that the relationship is over, spend a few days immediately after breaking up recollecting where things went wrong in your first relationship. It also helps you understand your own flaws and what you really need in a partner that they weren’t able to provide.

Learn from the experience, appreciate it, and then move forward. [Read: 30 relationship rules and advice to have your best ever love life]

8. Avoid your ex

I know you can’t even think of this, but right now you’re in a state of addiction. All you can see, think, and feel is them even when they’re no longer around anymore. You reminisce the memories you once shared and everything around you reminds you of them.

You think you need your ex, but yet, you know that even looking at your ex-lover will only make you feel worse. It’s a vicious cycle. There’s absolutely nothing you can gain in seeing or being close to your ex.

If you think you can even be friends with them, you’re setting yourself up to fail – again. Stop coming up with every excuse to contact them or see them and stop stalking their socials. Just stop, okay? You’re stronger than you think you are. [Read: How to stop thinking about someone you still like]

9. Understand what love is

Now that you’ve been in a relationship for the first time, you now know what love is. With this experience, you know what love should be and what it’s not.

Until you actually fall in love with someone, you’d never really know what all the fuss is about. You realize that maybe love doesn’t always conquer all and maybe the universe lets you meet people just so you can learn something significant from them – not necessarily because they’ll stay forever. [Read: How to love again after being hurt]

10. You’ll get over it

Time heals everything. You may feel like the world’s collapsing on you right now, but trust me, it will all pass. Everyone feels like their first love is a pain they will never recover from, but they end up moving on anyway.

In learning how to get over your first love, you’ll eventually discover your own strength and resilience in something as unbearable as heartbreak. You’ll get over your first love. But you won’t forget that person. And you don’t have to.

[Read: The 10 types of love you’ll experience in your lifetime]

So, how to get over your first love?

Your first love is the person who introduces you to the face of love, but they’re also the one behind a lot of unexpected pain and heartbreak. Life isn’t like the movies and we don’t always end up with our first love – and that’s okay.

[Read: 14 things you must keep in mind if your ever bump into your first ex]

When learning how to get over your first love, these tips are the key to moving on. You don’t need to do something as drastic as forgetting them completely, but you can better manage your heartbreak. Before you know it, you won’t miss them as much anymore.

The post How to Get Over Your First Love with a Happy Memory is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.