Party Themes for Adults: 35 Wacky Fun & Spunky Ideas to Get the Party Going!

Theme parties aren’t just for kids! Have an unforgettable night with our crazy and creative party themes for adults.

Becoming an adult doesn’t mean you have to put a stop to all the fun in your life. Although you may have work, kids, and home responsibilities, you should always make time to squeeze in a little fun every now and then. And what better way to have fun than with some crazy party themes for adults?

What adult isn’t overjoyed by the idea of leaving the kids for a night and heading off to enjoy time together? Not only should you get out and go to parties—you should also host them.

So, let’s bust out our most creative party ideas for a themed night you’ll never forget.

[Read: 22 super fun drinking card games to get the party and the fun times going!]

How to choose a party theme

Adult parties don’t have to be centered on conversation, sophisticated drinks, and dressy attire. How about throwing a theme party for all of your friends?

While themed parties may seem a little too “immature”, they aren’t. They’re not just for kids and drunk college students!

[Read: How to network at a party, talk like a VIP, and interact like a social butterfly]

If you really want to throw an adult theme party, there are a couple of things you need to consider. Maybe you aren’t sure which themes would be mature enough for your friends but still want them to be fun enough to let loose and get a little goofy.

Or maybe you’re trying to work around a budget and a limited amount of space. Whatever you need to keep in mind, here’s our simple checklist of things to consider when choosing a theme for your party:

1. Consider your budget

Before you start, you need to talk about money. Some themes are more expensive than others, and you don’t want to pick one that leaves you with a financial headache.

For example, a historical theme is much more expensive, while an ugly sweater party won’t break the bank.

If you’re on a tight budget, don’t forget that you can also cut costs with a little creativity. You can get creative with your decorations, food, and activities to bring in the theme. You can also ask your guests to bring a dish potluck-style or to help you with the preparations so the fun starts early.

[Read: The lazy twentysomething’s guide to saving money]

2. Think about your space

Another important factor to consider when choosing a party theme is your space. You can’t have a casino party if you’re living in your parents’ back room!

If you’re limited on space, then you may want to choose a theme that doesn’t require a lot of room to move around. There are plenty of themes that can be adapted to smaller spaces, too.

3. Consider your guests

Not all themes are appropriate for all groups of people. When choosing party themes for adults, it’s important to consider the age, interests, and values of your guests.

You want to choose a theme that everyone will enjoy, so don’t pick a pimps and hoes theme if you know your Mom’s coming along!

And remember, it’s not just you that’s spending money. Think about if your guests will need to hire out pricey costumes, too. [Read: The most insanely easy costume ideas for couples]

4. Be flexible

Sometimes, things don’t go according to plan. So if your original choice of theme doesn’t work out, be prepared to change it. Things like bad weather or last-minute cancellations can easily throw a wrench in your carefully-laid schemes.

But if something unexpected happens, don’t stress out. After all, a few unexpected guests or stray raindrops shouldn’t get in the way of an awesome party! There are still plenty of alternative party themes for adults you can pick from.

5. Pick a party theme early

The sooner you decide on a party theme, the more time you will have to plan and prepare. You will need plenty of time to find decorations, food, and activities that fit your theme.

This is especially important with theme parties, which usually take a little more time and effort to put together.

If you decide early, it will also give you time to send out invitations and get everyone excited about the party. And don’t forget to feel the hype yourself! If you’re not excited about your bash, then it will be difficult to get your guests going too.

[Read: How to throw the perfect surprise party for a friend]

The ultimate party themes for adults

There are endless possibilities when it comes to party themes. And with so many choices, it can feel pretty impossible to choose. That’s why we’re here with our list of ultimate party themes for adults!

Check out our suggestions and bear in mind the criteria we talked about above. When you think you’ve chosen your theme, you’ll be well on your way to planning the most perfect party ever!

1. Alphabet-themed

For this one, all you have to do is pick a letter and have that as the party’s theme. For example, you can have a “B” themed party, where everyone brings something that starts with the letter “B”. They can only wear clothes that are a color that starts with “B,” or from a store with a name that starts with “B”!

It’s a very simple theme with minimal work and decorations, but it’s still a ton of fun for you and all your friends. Beer, bananas, bacon, bean dip, brats, and the works! You’ll eat well and have your friends talking about your party for a long time to come. [Read: How to be funny – 28 must-know tips to make people love your humor]

2. Clue

Who doesn’t love a good murder mystery party? We know we do—especially when it’s a game we all used to play as kids. This brings back all the excitement of the game, but elevates it to an adult level, instead of just a board game you play at Christmas.

For this one to work, you’ll need people, envelopes, murder “weapons,” and labeled rooms in your house. When the guests arrive, they will each pick up an envelope that has sealed their fate for the night!

3. Color-themed

Honestly, color-themed parties are some of the easiest to execute and the most fun. Who doesn’t love dressing up in bright colors, and seeing how far you can go with your crazy outfits?

Another great idea for a color-themed party is to have each guest bring a dish… in that color. You could even make numerous batches of different-colored cupcakes for parties like these, or get really inventive with dishes and food dye that don’t usually go hand-in-hand.

4. Decade party

Decade parties are always fun because people get to dress up no matter what year you decide. It’s always the most fun when people choose a year when the fashion was especially outrageous, like the 70s.

But you could also ask people to dress for the decade they were born if you don’t want to have to theme the whole space with a set decade.

You can even have different “prizes” for the person who is the best-dressed for that decade or the person who has the craziest outfit.

5. Tiki theme

If the weather’s right and you want to take things outdoors, what better party than a tiki party? If you get the right props and venue, you can have a Hawaiian-themed get-together, where everyone has to dress up in tiki attire. Pina coladas, coconut bras, grass skirts—what’s not to love?

6. Casino night

Get out those cards, throw down some chips, and let the money fly. A casino-themed night is a really fun idea for adults of any age—as long as they’re old enough to be responsible!

You can play for real money, or just use fake cash and trade your “earnings” in for some cool prizes from the host.

7. Fondue party

Fondue parties have become very popular as of late. More and more people are throwing parties just to celebrate the molten deliciousness that comes in the form of fondue.

Whether you choose chocolate, cheese, or both, it’s never a bad idea to have a huge spread and have people over for the sole purpose of eating.

8. Black tie

The truth is that not a lot of adults get to dress up in fancy clothes and enjoy a sophisticated night out with friends—but they’re dying to.

So set a dress code, gather some fancy hors d’oeuvres, invite some friends, and pretend to live the high life for a little while.

9. Cartoon costume party

Cartoons nowadays aren’t nearly as awesome as they used to be. Throwing a cartoon costume party is an awesome way to not only let the kid in you out a little but also bring you back to a time that was carefree and fun.

Who wouldn’t love to ditch their adult responsibilities for a night and pretend they’re one of their favorite cartoon characters?

10. Literature costume party

Take a cartoon character party a little bit further—instead of cartoons, dress up as your favorite character from a book. Then see how many people can guess who you are. You can have prizes for the person who can guess the most characters!

If you want, you can ask that everybody brings a classic quote to make the guessing a little easier. [Read: 30 most romantic love quotes from books and literature]

11. High school

Take out that old yearbook and do some studying, because, with this out-of-the-box theme, you’re going to be throwing a party where everyone has to dress up as they would have in high school *minus the braces*.

So, do your hair big, get out those old jeans, and get to know your friends as they were back in high school.

12. Pun party

If you really want to be remembered for hosting the most bizarre yet hilarious themed party, then have everyone dress up as the best pun or cliche phrase they can think of. Chain-smoker, one-night stand, wallflower, elephant in the room… you name it.

Whoever comes up with the best pun of the night gets a prize. This theme is always fun and allows you to get creative and silly.

13. Ugly sweater party

Who doesn’t love a good ugly sweater party? Well, guess what—they’re not just for Christmas! Head on out to your nearest thrift store and pick up the ugliest sweater you can find.

A fun thing to do with this theme is to have everyone vote on whose sweater is ugliest, then award the winner with a prize.

14. Rockstar

Do you love rock and roll? A rockstar party is a great way to share your love for rock with your friends. Invite your friends to dress up as their favorite rockstars, and then dance the night away to your favorite tunes. You can even set up a karaoke machine so your guests can release their inner Axl Rose.

[Read: Party hours – what your favorite drink says about you]

15. Punk

Like a rockstar party, but a little more rebellious! You don’t have to like hardcore punk music to enjoy getting dressed up in some safety pins and tartan.

However, if you are partial to a little punk rock, get stuck in and set up a mosh pit so that everyone can let off some steam.

16. Goth

A goth party is an opportunity to embrace your dark side. To make the party even more atmospheric, you can decorate with black lights and play some goth rock music.

This is an especially fun idea if you’re known for having a happy, sunny personality. Why not surprise everybody by spending a night as the Prince/Princess of Darkness?

17. Neon rave

It’s rave time! Break out the Day-Glo and pump up the jams for a night of bright retro fun. It’s a unique spin on a typical dance party that makes things just a little more exciting.

Just make sure that you don’t wake the neighbors with your classic acid house beats! [Read: 50 crazy and impulsive things to do with friends that you’ll never forget]

18. Pimps and hoes

This one might be a little more controversial. But if you and your friend group have an edgy sense of humor, a pimps-and-hoes-themed party could be hilarious.

Play some loud music, set up a couple of casino games, and dress up in some serious bling. And remember, boys can be hoes too!

19. Mexican fiesta

A Mexican fiesta is a great way to celebrate your heritage or love of Mexican culture. Dress your guests in sombreros and Mexican attire, and make your own tacos to mariachi music. You can also set up a piñata or two so that everyone can try their luck at breaking them open.

20. Onesie party

With a onesie party, you can be cozy and have fun at the same time. There’s something special about a onesie that makes it much more comfortable than regular PJs.

Once you’re all cuddled up in your onesies, you can play games and watch movies all night long.

[Read: 27 best sleepover ideas and fun things to do while staying up with friends]

21. Celebrity lookalikes

Is there a certain celebrity that people always say you look like? Then why not try and become them for a night?

Get your friends to dress as their celebrity lookalikes, and try to guess who everybody’s supposed to be. You might find some resemblances you didn’t notice before.

[Read: Conversation games – 15 best talking games for fun and lots of laughs]

22. Beach party

Celebrate the summer weather with a beach party! Even if you don’t have a local beach, you can invite your friends over for some fun in the sun at your local park or your backyard.

You can provide some beach chairs, towels, and sunscreen. Then, play some classic beach games like volleyball, or have a sandcastle competition.

23. Pool party

Of course, this one assumes you have access to a pool. However, if it’s a hot day and you know a great place you can swim, then a pool party is an ideal party theme for adults.

Cool off on a hot day by just hanging out, or even introduce a little friendly competition with a swimming race.

24. Red carpet

Feel like a celebrity for the night by rolling out the red carpet. Don your most glamorous attire, and have your friends parade down a real-life red carpet to your door. You could even hire a photographer to act as the “paparazzi” and snap some special pics!

[Read: Hangxiety – 21 signs and how to deal with post-party anxiety]

25. Las Vegas

Viva Las Vegas! This is a perfect blend between a casino and red carpet theme, with a little hint of sparkle that makes it truly unique. Set up some casino tables, such as blackjack, roulette, and craps. Plus, to make the party even more exciting, you can hire a showgirl or two to perform.

26. White party

A classy and classic way to enjoy the summer weather, and you only have to do one thing: wear white! Even the decorations are easy, as all you need is white ribbons, flowers, and balloons.

Just make sure you don’t try and do this one after Labor Day—it’s just bad etiquette!

[Read: Super fun bachelor party ideas that don’t involve strippers]

27. James Bond

The name’s Bond, James Bond. You can’t get a more classy and cool theme than 007. Gather your secret agents, villains, and Bond girls for a night of tuxedo-clad fun. It’s also a perfect opportunity to show off your cocktail-making skills.

Remember—shaken, not stirred!

28. Mardi Gras

Channel the spirit of Mardi Gras on Bourbon Street with a themed party. You don’t need to go to New Orleans to create the party vibe of a masked ball.

Make sure you provide some beads, king cake, and other Mardi Gras-themed snacks. And plenty of whiskey…

[Read: The morning after – how to avoid a hangover]

29. Drag party

A drag party is one of the most fun and flamboyant theme party ideas for adults. Everybody can dress up in drag, and then lip-sync to their favorite tunes in a mini RuPaul’s Drag Race!

Also, you could organize a photo shoot to capture all your glamorous looks. As for decorations, just bust out the sequins and glitter!

30. Death to My Youth party

This one’s a little more high-concept but has a great dark sense of humor. A ‘death to my youth’ party is a funeral-style party celebrating the end of your younger days, with DIY tombstones, a RIP cake, and other novelty decorations to poke fun at your milestone age. It’s lots of fun for big birthdays like 30, 40, or even 50 if you’re young at heart.

31. Masquerade ball

Spend the night as Marie Antoinette with a glamorous masquerade ball. This might be one of the more costly and extravagant party themes for adults on our list, but it’s always going to be memorable. Make sure you make your venue look lush and decadent to match your gorgeous guests.

[Read: Drunk kiss – 15 types, levels of kisses, and the meaning of a drunk makeout]

32. Toga party

Sure, this party theme might have a little of a college-kid vibe. But that could be super nostalgic if you play it right! Plus, it’s super easy for your friends to get hold of a costume—all they need is a bedsheet and some safety pins!

If you want party themes for adults you can throw in last minute or on a budget, this is the one for you.

33. Gatsby party

A roaring 20s party is a great way to celebrate the decade of decadence. Invite your friends to dress up in their favorite flapper attire, and then dance the night away to some of the best jazz music of the era. You can also set up a speakeasy so that your guests can enjoy some “illegal” cocktails.

[Read: How to be witty – 25 ways to win everyone over with your charm]

34. Zombie apocalypse

This party theme isn’t just about getting the chance to dress up in your best, gnarliest zombie costumes. You can also add an element of an escape room, with different tasks to complete, and items to collect in order to “survive.”

If you have a little extra money, then you could even hire some professional zombies for an added scare.

35. Wild West

Time travel back to the Wild West with an old-time cowboy theme. Get your friends to dress up as their favorite cowboys and cowgirls, and then have them participate in a square-dancing western hoedown. Serve themed snacks like chili, Tex-Mex tacos, and fried chicken for extra authenticity.

[Read: How not to be boring and get people excited to talk and be around you]

No matter which of these spunky party themes for adults you decide to go with, just remember to let loose and have some fun! Everybody needs a good excuse to have an amazing party—and these themes are just the excuse you need.

The post Party Themes for Adults: 35 Wacky, Fun & Spunky Ideas to Get the Party Going! is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Tired of Being Single AF: 51 Signs & the Dating Goals and Habits You Need

If you’ve been single for a while now, you might be tired of it. But don’t start thinking that you’ll be single forever—instead, embrace the single life! 

You’re tired of being single—we hear you loud and clear! If you’ve been single for a while, it’s not always because you haven’t found the right person yet or because of bad timing. Sometimes, we’re to blame for our own problems.

Do you really think that if you stopped making an effort in your appearance, turned down dates, and were negative all of the time, your soul mate would magically appear in your life? If you believe that, you are in for a rude awakening. While relationships aren’t always in our control, it’s still up to us whether we choose to get ourselves out there.

So if you’re tired of being single, remember that you attract who you are. Everything, from getting a promotion at work to finding a life partner, takes effort. You’re not going to meet anyone if you’re binging on Netflix every weekend.

Changing your attitude and behavior is the only way you’ll stop being single and get some action in your dating life! Here’s how you can do that. [Read: 42 secrets to be happy being single and alone and lessons it can teach you]

Why have you been single for so long?

Okay, it’s not always bad to be single, especially if you just got out of a bad breakup or are not ready. However, there comes a point when you’re just making excuses to feel better about yourself.

Come to think of it, there are so many ways to date nowadays, whether it’s through dating apps, social media, or simply going to a bar and talking to different people! But if you’re always stuck at home and not socializing, you’ll never date again.

Think carefully about the possible reasons why you’re tired of being single. Why has this dating dry patch gone on for so long?

It’s almost certainly nothing to do with you just not attracting the right person; it could be something deeper. For instance, maybe you’re holding onto past baggage or you have low self-esteem. Once you know what the problem is, you can start to fix it. [Read: Why am I single? The honest answer, 36 reasons & the excuses we use]

The signs you’re tired of being single AF

If you’re only just realizing you need to change, let us help you out. There are some pretty solid signs that say you’re tired of being single and you’re ready to mingle. How many of these do you recognize?

1. You fantasize more than you live

You tend to dwell on “what if” scenarios far more than you live in the real world. Most probably, you also fantasize about your imaginary partner and think about all the fun stuff you could do together.

No matter how much you fantasize, it won’t do you any good in terms of dating someone. If you’re tired of being single and are desperately imagining dating someone, snap out of your illusions and do something about it in the real world! [Read: 64 best places to meet men and ways to find your perfect attractive, eligible guy]

2. You’re always hooking up

Do you find yourself trying to convince your play buddy to stay the night? What about inviting them out for a date that doesn’t involve getting naked? Here’s a thought: perhaps you have come to a point where hooking up doesn’t do anything for you, and you yearn for something more.

Yes, hookups are fun and games. Until you get tired of it. [Read: Sleeping together but not dating – A really good idea or a bad one?]

There will always come a point when you become exhausted from the casual setup of hookups, no matter how good they are in bed or hot they are. Hookups will never provide the same fulfillment that a committed relationship will.

3. Jealousy rears its ugly head

You despise all your friends who are in happy relationships and can’t help but turn green with envy every time they regale you with their relationship stories.

You can’t help but feel sorry for yourself and you tend to wonder why the universe is so unfair. [Read: 46 secrets to stop being jealous for no reason and learn to live envy-free]

Well, maybe it’s not that the universe is unjust. Maybe you just don’t make enough effort to change your life. Relationships are hard work, which isn’t limited to landing yourself on a date or meeting a cute stranger.

You need to do the work to get what you want, just like anything else in life. So if you’re honestly tired of being single, stop feeling jealous of all your friends and just get yourself out there! [Read: 28 thirsty signs you’re sexually frustrated, horny, and need sex ASAP]

4. You whine about it

Everyone, from your BFF to your cleaning lady, knows that you’re tired of being single. Watch the words you end up saying to yourself because more often than not, it ends up being true.

You get nothing from complaining about how tired you are of being single, but you get something if you do something about it. All you’re doing by complaining is bringing a lot of negative vibes into your life, which you don’t even need. [Read: 46 tips, rules, and relationship advice for women to have a great love life]

5. You call up exes

Thinking about your ex and wondering what went wrong is perfectly normal. But if you go the extra mile and call them up to rekindle the romance, you have certainly gone too far. This isn’t a good habit to maintain, especially when you keep complaining you’re tired of being single.

Being stuck on an ex and chasing after them will do you no good. Your relationship ended for a reason, and it’s best to move forward with acceptance and clarity. If you need closure, then get it. But don’t keep chasing after them. [Read: Resolute ways to resist the urge to call your ex]

6. You’ve forgotten how to share

Being single means having everything to yourself. From hogging the blanket to ordering takeout for one, there’s no need to share anything if there’s no one special in your life.

Once you start resenting others for assuming that you’re down to share something *whether it’s splitting the check or enjoying a buy-one-free-one savings*, you should realize that you’re not being cheap—you’re just getting too comfortable being single.

There’s something fulfilling about sharing things with a partner, so the fact that you forgot how to share means you’re missing the dating scene quite a bit. [Read: 16 silly bad habits that can hurt your relationship]

7. You detest weddings

It’s not just weddings that put you off—it’s any event or gathering that showcases couples, love, romance, and everything that you don’t have. It’s pretty normal to feel this way, significantly more when you’re growing tired of being single. So don’t worry, you’re not alone in this feeling!

The best thing you can do is *try your best* to be happy for the bride and groom getting married and use that wedding to get yourself out there! It’s considered a social event, so you never know, right? [Read: When will I find love? 25 secrets that WILL help you find the one]

8. You agree to blind dates and online dating

It’s a general belief that, once you resort to blind dates and online dating, you’re desperate. This isn’t true for everyone, of course, and is definitely a nasty stereotype, but if you can’t find yourself a mate and have to resort to these options, you must really want to find a partner quickly.

After all, it’s the most convenient way of getting yourself out there. If you really can’t help it and feel like you’ll find someone through these options, why not? It’s better than binging Netflix all day and doing nothing for your dating life. [Read: Why dating apps and online dating sucks and 37 secrets to make it fun and flirty!]

9. You get emotional

Chick flicks, love songs, couple-themed memes, and other mushy love stuff make you want to lock yourself in an underground bunker and die. Not just that, any image with those annoying #RelationshipGoals hashtags makes you want to flush your phone down the toilet.

There’s no reason to get so emotional—unless you’re way too tired of being single and want a change. If you get triggered by these things, it’s time to make a change and maybe change your relationship status from single to dating! [Read: Why am I so emotional? Emotional stability and 27 secrets to balance life]

10. You’ve relaxed your standards

Remember when you were picky about who you wanted to date? Well, those were the good ol’ days. Now, you find yourself relaxing your standards so much, that you’re willing to settle for anyone—as long as they are single and somewhat into you.

This is an obvious indicator that you don’t want to be single any longer and are looking to date someone… anyone, for that matter. [Read: Higher standards – Why going low only leads to lousy relationships]

11. It’s no secret

The people in your life most probably are aware that you’re single and looking for someone. You boast about it whenever you get the chance, whether it’s through social media captions or your stories.

Sure, there’s nothing wrong with declaring that you’re ready for a relationship and a family, but is announcing it on social media really the appropriate thing to do? It brings us back to our first sign of not living in the real world. [Read: 19 clear signs you are ready for a serious relationship]

12. You’re starting to agree with your mother

Her incessant chants of, “you’re going to die alone” and “where the hell are my grandkids?” no longer annoy, but motivate you. Once you start making sense of your mother’s nagging, you know that it’s probably time for you to seek out a mate.

So that should be motivation enough to try harder in finding someone and seek love the best chance you get! Nobody should be doomed to die alone, you know. [Read: Harsh dating tips you need to accept to make dating work for you]

13. You’ve been on a dating website or app for way too long

Look, there’s no measurement for how long you should be using a dating app or website. However, if you’ve been doing this and you haven’t landed a date with the potential of developing a relationship with them, it’s a sign you’re tired of being single *and have been single for way too long*.

So stop depending on dating apps and go to a social gathering, attend a work event, and meet someone in person! Maybe dating apps aren’t your thing, and that’s completely fine! [Read: Bumble vs. Tinder – Which hot dating app best fits your love needs?]

14. You feel overwhelmed with relationship talk

It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed with relationship talk, especially when others ask how long ago was your last relationship. Every time you tell people it’s been three years since your last relationship or six years, you end up feeling overwhelmed by how long it’s been.

You start contemplating everything in your dating life, including the few to several attempts that never made it into an actual relationship.

15. People assume you’re not available

There are two types of single people in this world—one who keeps turning down people, and one who dates every breathing person on the planet.

If you tend to be the first one and you’ve been doing it for a significant period, people will assume that you definitely aren’t single and ready to mingle. Everyone, including your loved ones, assumes that you’re just not interested in a relationship. [Read: 18 signs a person is meant to be single and you like it that way!]

16. You’re tempted to date your one-night stand

Whether it was a one-night stand or a friends-with-benefits situation, you’re so desperate to date someone that you’re willing to turn your casual fling into something more. Even if you don’t feel anything for them, you don’t really care—you just want to date someone.

This kind of desperation is what it feels like to be tired of being single. You settle for even your hookups to make it into a dating relationship.

17. You can’t recall your last genuine kiss

It’s easy to kiss without emotions, as you do it all the time with casual flings and hookups. But what really matters is the kiss that made you feel something. The type of kiss you see in movies where there’s nobody else in the room but them and sparks start to fly when your lips touch.

It might seem a tad dramatic, but it’s what a kiss with emotions feels like! So if you can’t recall the last time you felt that way, it’s because you’re tired of being single. [Read: 29 sensual, romantic secrets to kiss someone passionately and deeply]

18. You detest love songs and movies

Watching The Notebook or A Walk To Remember with your friends over the weekend? Pass, you’d rather watch a sitcom instead, or maybe an action film.

That’s how much you detest anything and everything that resembles love and romance. This is because they remind you of everything you could possibly want in life but aren’t achieving. [Read: Love sucks! 36 reasons why we hate it and yet crave for it]

19. You blog way too much

When you look at your personal blog, it all has hints of your personal experience of love and relationships, including breakups and relationship advice *even ones you can’t seem to follow for yourself*.

If you’re blogging way too much, it could be because you’re using it as a way to express the fact that you’re tired of being single. Writing and blogging about your emotions is a great release, after all.

20. You’ve tried every hobby on the planet

Whether it’s dance class, painting a canvas, learning how to knit, or even making a decent video, you’ve tried everything! This is normal when you’re trying to reinvent yourself after a breakup but do it too long, and you end up doing every hobby that exists.

So if this is the case, you’re clearly just tired of being single and trying to fill the time that you want to be spending with a partner. [Read: Why does everyone hate me? 69 things you do that people probably don’t like!]

Are your ingrained habits keeping you single?

It’s very possible that the habits you have and don’t realize are actually the very things that keep you totally single. Yes, you could be sabotaging yourself without even knowing it.

So, let’s check out some of the habits that you really need to recognize and kick out of your life. [Read: 18 bad habits that’ll make your partner want to leave you]

1. You think you’re not good enough

If you have been single for a while, there’s a very good chance that you have this awful habit of telling yourself that you’re not good enough for that cute barista, that hot accountant at work, the gym instructor with the abs of steel, or for anyone else, for that matter.

If you think you’re not good enough, then every potential partner who comes your way will also think that you’re not good enough, too.

Confidence is key when trying to score a mate, so be sure to exude it from every pore. It doesn’t matter if you’re not the sexiest, funniest, smartest, or best-looking person in the room.

All that counts is how confident you are about how you look and feel. It will shine through, and you will be the flame that draws in all the moths. [Read: How to feel more confident in your body and fall in love with you]

2. You think you don’t deserve a relationship

You’ll be surprised at how superstitious some people can be. If you think some misdemeanor in the past is the reason you’re single, you need to snap out of it. The universe isn’t punishing you, but it’s quite possible that your mindset and superstitions are!

3. You think you’re not ready

You need to stop telling yourself that you’re not ready for a relationship. By constantly telling yourself that, you’re just messing with your mind and turning that nonsensical thought into reality.

Of course, digging yourself out of the darkness after a hard breakup is very difficult. However, you must relearn how to put yourself out there and leave the past behind.

Heartbreak sucks, but you cannot let it hold you back from finding someone new. If you keep clinging to the past, you will never experience a brand-new future. [Read: Self-love secrets after a break up and ways to raise your broken self-esteem]

4. You’re obsessed with timing

Many people use “timing” as an excuse for not getting into a relationship, but most are kidding themselves. There’s no such thing as “the right time.” There are some exceptions, of course, and those include still being married, going bankrupt, or dealing with mental issues.

Any excuse other than those signifies cowardice.

Life is short, and you don’t know if you’ll even have tomorrow to play with. It’s all about ups and downs, and there will never be a time when everything is absolutely perfect. If perfection is what you’re waiting for, then you’ll be single forever.

Stop hesitating when it comes to matters of the heart because if you don’t jump in, you’ll never know just how great it could be. [Read: Fear of rejection – 56 signs, causes, and ways to overcome and get over it]

5. You’re a gossip-monger

As the saying goes, “What Susie says of Sally says more of Susie than of Sally.” No one wants to date someone with a big mouth and a bad attitude, so be sure to vanquish that habit today.

Keep your life and the lives of those around you drama-free, and you’ll find that potential partners will be more eager to date you.

6. You’re too picky

Stop finding fault with everything and everyone. Being high-maintenance is not a good look on you or on anyone else, for that matter. If you’re picky, you’re going to drive some real gems away. Finding fault in everything and everyone will only work against you.

For example, if you complain about how someone dresses or what they do for a living, you can rest assured that you’ll be single for a long time. No one will be good enough for you if you don’t let the little things go. [Read: The 41 best qualities of a good man that sets him apart from lesser men]

7. You have impossible expectations

Sure, everyone wants to date someone super-hot and famous, but that’s not going to happen. Snap back to reality, and stop envisioning the impossible.

So what if they’re a little soft around the edges? They have a good heart, and will always be kind to you. So what if they talk too loudly in restaurants? They’re funny and make you laugh.

There’s nothing wrong with setting standards for yourself, but you need to seriously keep your expectations realistic if you don’t want to be single for the rest of your days. [Read: 19 unrealistic expectations in love we want to believe but shouldn’t]

8. You don’t know what you want

Life is for the living, and there’s no point in wasting it by blindly making your way through life. Set clear goals for yourself, and figure out what you want.

Do you want to be with someone who wants to live a nomadic life of travel and adventure? Do you want to settle down with someone who wants a family? Are you keen on dating someone who’s fine with an open relationship? Do you only want a “fun buddy?”

Sort out what you want, and the rest will come easy. [Read: Lower your expectations – the best way to find love or compete BS?]

9. You’re unhappy with yourself

If you’re unhappy with yourself, you have to realize that it is obvious to those around you, including potential lovers.

It shows in the way you act, talk, and walk. Who do you think potential dates are going to flock to at a party: the one sitting with hunched shoulders in the corner or the one smiling and dancing on the dance floor?

Unless you can learn to love yourself and be confident with who you are, you will never be able to fully love another. Potential partners can sense that, and trust us when we say that no one wants the drama of having to deal with your emotional baggage.

10. You reek of desperation

It’s obvious in the way you interact with potential partners, and you can be sure that desperation stinks way more than sour milk. Reign your desperation in, and act like you could have the pick of anyone in the room.

If you truly believe that, then everyone else will too, and you’ll find it much easier to score a date. [Read: 36 soul secrets to find your soulmate, draw them closer, and meet them soon]

Dating goals to have when you’re with someone new

If you’re tired of being single, it may be that when you do meet someone, you make mistakes that ruin it from the start.

Setting dating goals keeps your mind on track and stops you from jumping to conclusions. It can also help you choose the right person, rather than someone wildly unsuitable. So, what are some things you should be keeping in mind?

1. Date someone who respects your time

A lot of people don’t realize just how important this expectation is. Our time is limited—we shouldn’t waste it. Therefore, you should date someone who respects your time and is aware that you’re giving up a lot by dating them.

If you’re dating someone who hardly gets back to you at all or in a timely manner, they’re certainly not worth it. Find someone else who will respect the time you give them. [Read: 22 early warning signs of a bad boyfriend you need to leave ASAP]

2. Find someone who shares your core values

You don’t need to have everything in common with the person you’re with. You can enjoy different types of music and movies and still have a successful relationship. That is, so long as you have the same core values.

One of your dating goals should be to find someone who shares your deepest beliefs. These are things like religion, your morals, and the things you value most.

The things that make you who you are and direct your life should be shared with the person you’ll end up spending forever with.

3. Date someone in it for the same reasons

You just can’t ignore when the person you’re dating isn’t on the same page as you. Put your expectations out there right away. Tell them you want someone who’s in it for the real thing.

You’re ready to find the one and you need to make sure they want to, too. If you just date anyone and hope that they want the same things as you, you could end up really hurt.

Eventually, you’ll find out they’re just looking for some fun in the bedroom. [Read: 42 signs you’re not ready for a serious relationship and how to let them know]

4. Date someone who has passions

It doesn’t really matter what those passions are—so long as they’re healthy and moral. You just want someone who is passionate about something. Make one of your goals to date someone like this.

It’ll help show you who they are. Since our passions speak volumes about us, this is important.

5. Find someone interested in your interests

This isn’t to say that they have to have the same hobbies as you. Actually, they may not even understand a hobby of yours at all. This is more of them finding interest in the things you love and care about.

You’re likely to pick up new hobbies and interests as life goes on and you need someone who is supportive of those things. It doesn’t matter if they don’t understand them. That’s why this should be on your list of dating goals. [Read: 35 new relationship advice and tips to avoid common mistakes couples make]

6. Date someone who isn’t shallow

First of all, shallow people are a huge turn-off in general. However, you definitely need to have the expectation of dating someone who isn’t shallow. Find someone who cares about the deeper qualities of a person.

Because beauty on the outside is fleeting. You’re adorable and good-looking for only a short amount of time; you will age. So you want to have someone by your side who still thinks you’re amazing because of what’s underneath the surface. [Read: Why inner beauty is more important than looks]

7. Find someone who adds value to your life

If you’re the only person bringing anything good into the relationship and you’re receiving nothing, it’s a recipe for disaster.

A successful relationship is a two-way street. You both need to give and take. If they’re getting way more positive things from you and you’re getting nothing in return, it just won’t work out.

8. Date someone who envisages a similar life to you

This is something that needs to be high on your list of dating goals. You should be looking for someone who has the same vision of what a happy life looks like.

If you disagree on this, you’ll never be able to actually live a happy life with them without being unhappy about certain things. [Read: 250 fun, deep relationship questions for couples to feel closer and more loved]

9. Find someone who makes you laugh

Life can get really tough and you will be faced with hard times. You need to find someone who can make you laugh and who you can laugh easily with.

During the toughest times, you’ll need that person to help lift your spirits. We cannot emphasize enough how important this is.

10. Date someone you can have deep discussions with

At the same time, you also need to find someone you can get serious with. All jokes and humor won’t cut it in the real world. Your expectations need to be deeper than that. [Read: 40 very deep questions to ask someone before you get close to them]

You need to be able to talk about the difficult stuff and the meaningful things in life. Finding someone who can connect with you on a deeper level and who you can actually talk about meaningful things with is crucial to finding the person to spend your life with. [Read: Couple goals – 58 fake and real ideas you MUST add to your relationship goals]

But… maybe you want to stay single in the end

This might sound a little off-center, but hear us out. You see, once you’ve been single for a while and then you eventually start dating, you might realize that you miss your single life after all!

Trust us, it happens! If that’s the case, you need to focus on yourself and stay single until the mood takes you and you want to find a serious relationship to finally settle into.

But always remember, you don’t have to be with someone to have a good time. [Read: What is serial monogamy – how it works and 23 signs of a serial monogamist]

1. Don’t think about the invisible clock

There’s no clock. Okay, women have a biological clock, but other than that, there’s no clock. You don’t have to get married by 28 nor do you have to buy a house by 30. There’s no clock, people!

Just go with the flow and do things on your own time. [Read: 58 of the best and worst reasons to get married and signs you’re not ready for it]

2. Make a list of things you want to do

Make a list of everything that you want to do. Maybe you want to travel to Europe or Japan. Maybe you want to take salsa dancing lessons or maybe you want to learn how to do graphic design. Write it down.

Make that list as long as you want, we don’t care. The point is, use this list as motivation for you to enjoy this single life. Focus on you.

3. Don’t be closed-minded about relationships

If someone asks you out, go out on a date with them. You see what you’re looking for in a relationship and the type of person you need.

This is the time when you should be exploring, so don’t be a Debbie Downer when it comes to finding love. [Read: 33 easy ways to meet new people and widen your social circle effortlessly]

4. Look at the flaws of your past relationship

Work on what was wrong in your past relationships. We know you don’t want to admit it, but you’re flawed. That’s normal.

So, take some time in looking at what you did in the past and what you want to change about yourself. Now’s the time to do it. [Read: 30 secrets to start over a new life and leave your past for a new adventure]

5. Develop strong relationships with your friends

When you’re single and crying every night alone, well, of course, you’re not having a good time. Invest your spare time hanging out with friends and family. Go out to the bar, try out a new restaurant with your buddies, or go to Mexico for vacation.

You’re single, you have time. A lot of time. So, use it. When you’re in a relationship, your friends and family are going to be put on the back burner, you know that. So, spend this time with them.

6. Think of being single as a positive lifestyle choice

Being single is really fun… if you’re doing it right. If not, you’ll end up dating someone similar to your ex. Then it’s just the same cycle all over again.

If you take the time to think of this as a learning experience about yourself, well, then you’re taking this time with a positive mind which is what you need to be doing. Think positive, and good things will happen! [Read: Why does dating get harder when you reach your 20s?]

7. Tune out the negative

Your grandparents may be asking you why you’re single and all your friends may be getting married but that doesn’t mean you need to go down that road just yet.

You need to just remove all the nagging from friends and family and just focus on yourself. This negative energy isn’t doing anyone any good.

It’s definitely not going to make you find someone any faster. So, just chill out. If someone you like pops up into your life, then go with it. [Read: Single and ready to mingle – how to let the world know you’re ready]

8. Do whatever the hell you want

Want to eat ice cream for dinner? Do it. Want to have a one-night stand? Swipe that Tinder. You do whatever you want.

That’s the beauty of being single—you have ultimate freedom. We know relationships can be nice, but for now, you’re single, so go wild.

9. Focus on your passions

Whatever it is that you love doing—painting, dancing, singing, writing—just do it. One of the secrets to knowing how to stay single is to distract yourself with things you enjoy doing.

Now is the time when you’re not distracted with dating and the whole she-said-he-said bullshit, so just focus on what brings you happiness.

Throw yourself into your passions. You’ll notice how amazing the outcome is. And it’s not for someone else, it’s for you. [Read: 32 secrets to be present and live in the moment when life is speeding past you]

10. Continue being sexually active

Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you’re dead. So, either bulk up on the sex toys or find a friend with benefits to sleep with whenever you feel the urge. Maybe then you won’t feel so tired of being single!

Just make sure you’re always being safe!

11. Don’t glue yourself to social media

There’s something great about social media: you get to show off your single-ness. But on the other side, it seems that social media loves to poke fun at single people. They deem single people as pathetic and depressing, but that’s not true.

There’s no self-pity associated with the single life. So, if social media is being a damper on your time, just put it to the side. [Read: Social media detox: 13 ways to wean yourself off of social media]

Don’t allow your single tiredness to push you into the wrong relationship

Being single is all about being young, wild, and free. But it’s not something you can keep doing for an extended period.

It’s easy to get used to being single, realizing that nobody can break your heart or disappoint you. However, it also prevents you from experiencing love or togetherness with someone special.

The other thing to remember is that when you’re tired of being single, you might just jump into the first relationship that comes your way. Don’t do that. Wait for the right person, and trust us, it will be more than worth your time.

[Read: When will I find love? 25 secrets that WILL help you find the one]

If you’re tired of being single, don’t rush it and only date when you’re ready. The single lifestyle isn’t so bad!

The post Tired of Being Single AF: 51 Signs & the Dating Goals and Habits You Need is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

Tactics Tuesdays: Verbal Buy-In During Sexual Escalation

Another way to get intimate with women. Rather than just feeling them up and undressing them, you can prompt them to verbalize desire for you instead.

In my article on pussy-centric escalation, a commenter asked me for examples of getting verbal, logical buy-in to your escalation to intimacy. I recommended this for any girl who seemed like she was either on the fence or could cause trouble (e.g., an orange flag girl, etc.).

So let’s talk verbal buy-in during your sex escalations!

Verbal buy-in is anything you are doing to get a girl to affirm that yes, she really wants this next step in the seduction to occur.

You’ve no doubt heard of the social justice / feminist / egalitarian concept of “affirmative consent”, yes? You might’ve thought it a terrible, seduction-killing concept. But believe it or not going for verbal buy-in as you seduce is basically just this: it is the same concept as “affirmative consent”, just gussied up and made sexier.

I’m going to show you how to do this today, and add another powerful tool to your sexual escalation arsenal.

41 Honest Reasons Why You Have No Friends That Care & Steps to Fix It ASAP

Are you the kind of person who has no friends? If so, you might wonder why. If you change your behavior a little, then you might be a lot less lonely. 

Our world really values people with extroverted personalities and social skills. But maybe you feel like you missed the memo on that one. You might be home alone night after night, with no friends, and with no one to call or text. While you might like it that way, it does get lonely… doesn’t it?

If you like yourself and your life the way it is, keep doing you! But if you think that you’d be happier with even one or two friends, keep on reading. In this feature, we’ll cover maybe why you don’t currently have friends and what you can do to expand your social circle.

[Read: 27 fun ways to make new friends and mistakes to avoid + the best social apps]

Is it normal to have no friends? 

While you might think that everyone else is a social butterfly and you’re the only one without friends, you’d be surprised! Generally speaking, it actually is relatively normal to have no friends. In fact, a report from 2019 found that about 20% of people have no friends. 

And in 2021, another report found that 36% of people feel seriously lonely. So, if you don’t have friends, you’re not the only one.

Some are just not good at meeting people. And others… aren’t. Whether that’s because they’re shy, introverted, socially anxious, or just lack the social skills to make friends. Or all of the above. [Read: Good friends are like stars – 18 ways to build lasting friendships]

Whether or not it’s normal to have no friends is a very individual thing. If you tend to be a loner, then it’s perfectly normal and you might enjoy the fact that you don’t have any friends.

Are you happy with your life or do you feel lonely? Is there a good reason you don’t have any friends? If you aren’t happy, then you should try different things to meet new people.

The dangers of loneliness

Isolation is a problem for a lot of people. And that’s because with isolation comes loneliness. See, humans are naturally social creatures, so we’re not really designed to be completely socially isolated. [Read: How to not feel lonely – 30 ways to chase the lonely blues away]

Maybe you don’t have any friends. Maybe you don’t even have one person who you rely on or vent to, and maybe you’re perfectly happy with that. But if you’re feeling lonely and isolated from the world, it can have seriously bad effects on you, including your physical health.

Studies show that loneliness can increase a person’s likelihood of developing dementia, heart disease, stroke, mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety, and even premature death. So if you’re feeling lonely, it’s not something to take lightly.

While some people might see loneliness as a trivial or childish feeling, it’s actually something we should all take very seriously.

Reasons why you might have no friends

Sometimes it’s difficult to figure out why you have no friends. Everyone is different, so not all of these reasons are going to apply to you. But if you read them and say to yourself, “Oops, that’s me!” then you should start taking a good, long look in the mirror.

With that said, here are some possible reasons you might have no friends. [Read: How to make friends in a new city – 15 ways to feel at home again]

1. You try too hard, and it shows

Are you constantly pursuing people to meet you, even when they don’t seem too keen to make time for you? Or, when you meet a friend or a group of friends, do you constantly try to get everyone to stay back, even if it’s very clear that they’re bored stiff?

You come off as too clingy and needy.

Spending time with a new friend may matter a lot to you, but when you try too hard, you could come off as a clingy and annoying person. [Read: Clingy friend – what makes people needy and 22 ways to fix the friendship]

2. You have a hard time picking up social cues

Is the person you’re talking to getting bored? Do you even realize this is the third time they’re looking at their watch? 

Just because you think you’re having a fun time doesn’t mean everyone else is. Pay attention to the behavior of people around you when you talk to them. And maybe change the conversation the minute you see others becoming distracted.

[Read: 45 happy ways to keep a conversation going and be a lot of fun to talk to]

3. You don’t have friends because you read between the lines

And, you read it way too much! You constantly assume the whole world revolves around you.

So, your friend shared a quote on Facebook? Wait, does that have something to do with you? Was there a secret message addressed to you? Is he or she trying to say something to you? Stop!

Stop trying to constantly assume that there’s a hidden agenda or meaning behind everything a friend does or says. It might sound harsh, but not everything is about you. [Read: Losing a friend – 30 ways to face the pain of best friends drifting away]

4. You create psychological barriers

Do you ever hold back a thought because you think you may sound silly for saying it? And most importantly, do you feel uncomfortable around your friends? 

If you do, your body language may be picked up by your friends’ subconscious minds and make them feel uncomfortable and restless around you.

5. You’re a boring conversationalist

Maybe you don’t have any friends because you speak about things that just don’t interest the people you’re around. And when you do, you just don’t know when to stop. Just because something interests you doesn’t mean the whole world should be fascinated by it! [Read: How to be funny – 28 must-know tips to make everyone love your humor]

Here’s a cue—if a friend listens to what you have to say without making any effort to add their own views, in all probability, they’re just waiting to run away from you.

6. You’re toxic

You’re a toxic friend. Sure, we sound harsh, but maybe you need the harsh truth.

You always leave people in a bad mood, and then you say goodbye, and your friends are happier when you leave than when you’re around. 

It could be the things you say, or the choice of words you use to say something, that just makes people want to curl their toes around you.

It’s hard to admit that you might be a toxic friend. But it’s absolutely necessary if you want to change your ways and hold on to friendships. [Read: 34 signs to know how and when to end a friendship that’s toxic and hurting you]

7. You’re in the wrong crowd

Sometimes, annoying people don’t like you even when you’re really nice, and that’s probably because they have a preconceived notion about who you are. 

This could be through rumors or based on your not-so-secret past. You can’t change that, and the effort you’re going to take to make them believe you’re a really nice person is just not worth it. [Read: Critical lessons to deal with judgmental people]

8. You’re right. You always are.

At least, that’s what you think! You argue over the silliest of things. You think an interesting argument is the perfect way to keep a conversation alive. [Read: Bad friends – 25 types of friends you MUST delete right now!]

Do you have the urge to contradict people aggressively over the smallest of things, perhaps to prove them wrong or to make yourself feel better?

When people give up arguments within a minute or two while talking to you, it’s not a case of you making a strong point. 

9. You forget your friends when you don’t need them

Do you really pay attention to your friends? Or do you just ignore your friends and their calls/texts when you’re having fun with someone else? Do you avoid your friends when you start dating someone new? [Read: People pleaser – 21 signs you’re one and how to stop people pleasing]

You really need to think about this one. You may not realize it, but you may be taking your friends for granted and assuming they’ll always stick around for you, whether you have time for them or not.

10. You’re insecure and jealous

You have trust issues and feel threatened each time your friend meets someone new. You subconsciously make it a point to make your friend feel bad for ignoring you or spending time with someone other than you. When you’re jealous, it always shows. 

Your friends will absolutely hate being around you, especially when you try to make them feel guilty for meeting or spending time with others instead of you. [Read: 46 secrets to stop being jealous for no reason and learn to live life envy-free]

11. You’ve jumped or dropped a social status

Did your startup make it big and now you’re really rich all of a sudden? Your old, poorer friends may start ignoring you and think you’re a rich show-off all of a sudden. 

That’s because they feel threatened by your new-found success. [Read: How to stop being jealous of someone else’s success]

And in the flip side, if you were a richer person a year ago than you are now, there’s a good chance that your old friends may think lowly of you and bitch about you behind your back.

You’ll be the social pariah because you’re “not good enough for them” anymore! You can’t do anything about it, so just find yourself a few new friends who’ll appreciate you for who you really are. [Read: 36 life lessons to instantly transform your life and draw in happiness]

12. You’re fake!

You’re so fake you make Barbie look real! And everyone around you can see it. You may think you’re very smart and can cover the fact that you’re a liar who says nice things just to get things done. 

However, if your friends see through your behavior, you’ll be losing friends like you were squeezing sand in your hands. [Read: 33 secrets to be true to yourself and 15 signs you need to unfake your life!]

13. You’re too demanding

You have a lot of expectations of your friends, and voice your displeasure very vocally when they can’t do something for you. 

For some reason, you have this notion in your head that friends are out there to help you and it’s your right to ask them for help when you need to get something done. 

It probably worked well in your school days, but you can’t really expect friends to make time for the silliest of your whims all the time! [Read: How to make more friends when you’re feeling lonelier than ever] 

14. You’re not making the effort

Are you really trying to meet people, or are you sitting at home waiting for the miracle gods to stir up something for you? 

Making friends requires a lot of effort, just like working or making money. The best part about making friends is that it has an exponential effect!

When you make one friend, that person will lead you to two more. Those two will lead you to four more, and so on! [Read: 19 signs of a taker in a relationship and ways a giver can stop being so giving]

15. You’re selfish

No one wants to admit that they are selfish, do they? But maybe you need to take a good long look at yourself.

Do you always want to do things your way? Is your attitude always, “It’s my way or the highway?” This just doesn’t fly with most people. Because how would you feel if you never got anything you want? Exactly. 

So, don’t do that to other people. If you do, they won’t want to hang around you. And then you’ll continue having no friends. [Read: Are you selfish in the relationship? 19 signs you’re being a user]

16. You’re too introverted

Now, this isn’t something you can change very easily. We are who we are. 

Some introverts really do go into hermit mode, and they never contact people. After a while, their more extroverted friends take it personally, or at the very least, give up on them. 

It’s not fun having a one-way friendship. You have to give, at least a little, in every relationship. So, try to reach out to people more, and maybe they’ll start coming around again. [Read: 26 social mind tricks to be more outgoing, friendly, and talkative instantly]

17. You don’t take personal responsibility

There is nothing worse than someone who thinks they can do no wrong. Think about it—do you like people who never take responsibility for their part in something? Of course not! And what’s even worse is if the person blames you.

So, if you’re one of those people who is always dodging responsibility for your actions, or if you’re making up lies to avoid getting caught, then why would someone want to be your friend? 

Most people would drop you like a hot potato. [Read: 73 red flag narcissism signs and traits or a narcissist to read them like a book]

18. You’re Debbie Downer

Every time you are asked, “Hey, how are you doing?” you always respond with a laundry list of things that are going wrong in your life—no one likes that. 

People will eventually get to the point where they can’t stand your negativity. Sure, we all have problems. But do you really need to unload all of yours on your friends? All. The. Time? No, you don’t!

People like being around positive people. So, if you’re a Debbie Downer, then that’s probably why people around you slinked away one by one… until you finally had no friends. [Read: Negative Nancy – what makes one, 18 traits, and ways to deal with their attitude]

19. You’re a drama queen/king

Some people just crave attention and drama. They just do. They can’t truly connect with other people because they are too busy getting wrapped up in drama.

But if you’re one of these people, maybe the reason you have no friends is because they just can’t stand your drama anymore—especially if it involves them. [Read: Drama queen alert! Definitive ways to calmly deal with the diva]

20. You’re a liar

Who likes a liar? No one. Obviously, no one knows you’re a liar at first. It might take them a while to notice it. But they eventually will notice, and they’ll ditch you sooner than you can blink.

So, if you have a tendency to lie, ask yourself why you do it. No one likes to be lied to. Try to figure out why you do it, and then maybe you’ll be able to start building meaningful friendships. [Read: How to stop lying, to yourself and others around you]

21. You’re chronically late

Don’t get mad about this one, but this is a lot of people’s pet peeves. And we’re not talking 5 or 10 minutes late. 

We’re talking about the kind of late where you sit for an hour or two waiting for someone to show up at a restaurant. And then they waltz in with no apology. 

Other people’s time is valuable. Don’t be selfish and waste it! If you’re late, then try harder to be on time. It’s rude to keep people waiting, and it could be a reason you have no friends. [Read: Never make someone a priority when you’re only an option – the truth]

22. You’re a flake 

The flaky friend is one who makes plans with you and either forgets or bails on you at the last minute. You can never count on them.

You don’t take them seriously when they make plans with you because you know they’ll never follow through. 

Why would anyone want to get together with someone they know won’t even show up?

23. You take things too personally and can’t forgive

If you are the kind of person who blows up at other people because you take things too seriously and too personally, and then you hold a grudge forever, it would be hard for anyone to stay friends with you.

If you get mad at people for stupid stuff, stop doing that. And if the other person apologizes, accept that apology and don’t hold a grudge.

You don’t want people walking around on eggshells around you. That’s not a real friendship.

24. You’re an energy vampire

If you’re a Debbie Downer, then you’re also an energy vampire. In other words, you suck the life out of people. You pull on their energy so much that they feel drained in your presence. 

They don’t feel uplifted and happy, they feel like they have to go recharge their batteries because you just sucked everything out of them.

Here’s what to do if you have no friends

Now that you know why you don’t have any friends, what are you going to do about it? Are you just going to sit at home and complain about it? You could, but what good would that do? [Read: 33 easy ways to meet new people and widen your social circle effortlessly]

Here are some things you can try:

1. Ask friends if they have any mutual friends you can meet

You might worry about coming over as desperate by asking your current friends if they have any friends you can meet up with, but it’s about how you word it!

Mention that you want to expand your circle and explore new interests, and there’s sure to be someone who knows another person into the same things as you. 

Remember, if they’re a good friend, they’re not going to ask why you want to expand your circle anyway!

2. Don’t be afraid to talk first

How do you go about making more friends? By talking and making yourself seem approachable! If you’re in a coffee shop and someone next to you is alone, pluck up the courage to make the first move and start the conversation. 

Most of the time, the other person is waiting for you to break the ice because they’re too scared to do it themselves. Go on, be brave! [Read: Why is talking to people so hard and 57 secrets to talk to anyone and charm them]

3. Be open-minded

Just because someone doesn’t seem to be your ‘type of person,’ that shouldn’t stop you from having a conversation! Don’t be closed-minded. 

Have a conversation and see if there’s any type of common interest. Even if there isn’t, you might learn something from this person or find a new interest.

By sticking to the same types of people, you’ll never expand your horizons. Life will get a little boring. The best friendship groups cover a range of different personality types and quirks. [Read: 20 secrets to stop being selfish and ways to stop hurting and using others]

4. Become engrossed in your hobbies

The more time you spend on your hobbies and interests, the more you get out and do things with them that may leave you open to meeting other people.

For instance, if you’re into comedy, perhaps you’ll find the confidence to go to an open mic night. 

From there, you’ll meet other budding comedians or fans in the audience. [Read: How to be nice – 20 easy tips to make everyone love being around you]

5. Never say “no” to an invitation

Okay, maybe never is a stretch. But do your best to avoid saying no. By accepting invitations, you’re opening up the possibility of meeting new people and a boost to your social life in general.

Drag yourself off the sofa and go! You can easily meet potential new friends in places you might not realize, such as waiting for a drink at the bar.

6. Don’t become a social media hermit

If you have people on there that you don’t see generally, why not arrange to meet up? See if you can turn your virtual friendship into a real-life one instead. [Read: How to be a good friend – 49 traits and friend codes that define a real pal]

You probably became friends with this person in the first place because you knew each other in the past, or you have common interests, which are both precursors to great friendships!

7. Try volunteering at local events

Not only will you get a feel-good boost and load up your karma points by doing a good deed, but you will also meet lots of new people who are interested in the same cause as you.

There will be other volunteers there. Perhaps their reason for attending is the same as yours, to meet new people! Even if you don’t meet a potential new buddy, you did a good deed. [Read: Negative thinking – 32 signs and ways to stop and get rid of negative thoughts]

8. Be the one to suggest a coffee chat

Be the one to make the first move and initiate a conversation with someone in a coffee shop, a bar, or waiting in line for the bus. You could also be the one to suggest meeting up for a coffee chat one day or heading out for a walk. Whatever works for you.

In some cases, make it clear that it’s the friendship you’re after to avoid the other person getting the wrong idea.

9. Do the maintenance work

It’s all very well and good learning how to make more friends in the first place. But remember that friendship requires work! Remember to talk to this person regularly and socialize! 

It’s no good having a few chats and assuming they’re now part of your group. Don’t neglect your new friendship bond and find they’ve started ghosting you. Put in the work!

10. Assess your social situation 

Some people don’t have friends because they recently moved to a new city and haven’t established new friendships yet. That doesn’t make you unlikable—you’re just new where you are, so it’s normal to have no friends.

When someone lives in the same place their entire life, of course, they’re going to have friends. But if you’ve moved around for most of your life, it’s more difficult to create lasting friendships. 

Maybe your parents were in the military or just moved the family around a lot. As a child, you might not have developed the crucial social skills that it takes to cultivate a friendship. 

In fact, moving around might have frustrated you so much that you stopped making an effort to meet people because you knew you were going to leave eventually.

11. Work on your social skills

Not everyone is a natural “people person.” For some, social skills come easily, but for others, they don’t. 

It could be because you’re an introvert or maybe you were home-schooled and never had the opportunity to interact with other people very often.

Whatever the reason, your social skills might need to be worked on. [Read: Social cues – what it is, 22 universal behaviors, and how to respond to them]

You need to learn the art of making small talk, listening, asking questions, and initiating conversation. These skills will help you make new friends because you will come across as friendly and interested in getting to know people.

12. Ensure that you’re open to new friends

A lot of people get stuck in their comfort zones. [Read: Powerful steps to break out of your comfort zone]

And there’s nothing wrong with that—unless, of course, you want to make new friends. You’re going to have to step out of what you normally do and be open to meeting new people.

It might be difficult for you to do this. Maybe you’re shy, introverted, and a homebody. Well, that will create a barrier for you to meet new friends. 

In fact, you might consciously think you want friends, but perhaps subconsciously you really don’t. [Read: Social anxiety vs. shyness – 37 signs, differences, and ways to overcome them]

You might not even know why you’re not open to meeting new people, so you need to explore that if you want anything to change.

13. Connect with existing contacts

One great way to make new friends is to meet friends of friends. As the saying goes, “Birds of a feather flock together.” In other words, if you like someone you’re friends with, it’s likely that you will like their friends too. And then you can add them into your life.

Even if you don’t even have one friend that can introduce you to new people, brainstorm and think of who else you could ask. It’s likely that you have a job, so along with that comes colleagues.

So, ask a colleague to go to lunch or have a drink after work. Or maybe you have a sibling or cousin who has a lot of friends. [Read: Opposite sex friendships – 24 rules, boundaries, and where things go wrong]

Reach out to them and ask to hang out. Tell them that you’re looking to meet new people, and they’ll most likely be more than happy to help you out.

14. Use modern technology… the right way

Before the internet, people actually had to go out and meet their friends organically. But now, you have dating apps, social media, and other ways you can use technology to meet people.

In fact, some people have “significant others” that they met online but haven’t even met in person yet!

There are also friend apps that you can use just like dating apps but to find platonic relationships. This is an easy way to match up with someone who has the same interests and personality as you do. [Read: True friendship – 37 real friend traits and what it takes to be a good one]

15. Make friends at work

Unless you work remotely from home, you probably work with people. It doesn’t matter where you work, just start to get to know your colleagues. 

It might be uncomfortable for you to strike up conversations with them, but it won’t make them uncomfortable. Most people enjoy talking and getting to know new people. So, you have to just reach out and take a chance.

Ask them how they like their job, where they live, if they have any kids, or what their favorite flavor of ice cream is. [Read: Self-centered people – 40 signs and ways to change yourself or deal with one]

Offer to buy them a coffee, or suggest that the two of you go out to lunch together. Baby steps like this can lead to great and longlasting friendships.

16. Join groups

What kinds of things are you interested in doing? Do you like hiking, dogs, yoga, biking, or playing board games? It doesn’t matter what it is, but you should try to join some groups so you can meet like-minded people.

One great place to find groups is Meetup.com. They have groups for everything imaginable under the sun. [Read: 33 truths to overcome regret, deal with our bad choices and learn from it]

All you need to do is to search for whatever interests you and you’ll more than likely be able to find a group that you can join.

But if you’re looking to join other kinds of groups such as a business one, there are plenty of networking groups that you can try as well. Going to meetings and luncheons gives you the opportunity to meet new people you’ll likely get along with.

17. Walk a four-legged friend

There are two things that always get the attention of strangers: babies and dogs. You have probably noticed that whenever someone has a cute dog, people will stop, pet the dog, and talk to the owner about it. [Read: Asocial vs. antisocial – the similarities end with the name]

So, if you have a dog, don’t just walk them alone in the woods because you won’t meet anyone that way. Go to a park or downtown in your city where there are a lot of people out and about.

Even if you don’t have a dog, you might consider getting one. Not only is a dog a good companion for you, as you can see, but it can also help you meet people too. It can make striking up a conversation easy.

[Read: Why do I push people away? 37 signs, reasons, and ways to stop pushing]

This was probably not easy to read. But if you want to figure out why you have no friends, then it all starts with examining yourself, changing who you are, and only then, will people want to be around you.

The post 41 Honest Reasons Why You Have No Friends That Care & Steps to Fix It ASAP is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.